Chapter 10

Saturday November 16, 6:00PM

Denver Colorado

The click, click, click of the bedside clock sang out into the little room, signaling each minute as it fluttered from future to present to past, and yet each moment was just like the second before. There were no changes. There was no hope. There was no devastation. There was just moment after moment of endless waiting. It was torture.

Sully leaned back in the hard wood chair, his knee moving up and down to a steady rhythm he kept in his head. His body was numb; his muscles had fallen asleep long ago, leaving just his mind to work over the past few days. There had to be something he could have done differently. Somewhere there was a small decision that had been made that could have prevented all of this. There had to be, otherwise this was merely the work of the Fates. This had been their destiny. Somehow this thought, the thought that all those moments they'd shared, all the feelings he felt pointed to this moment and this moment alone was unbearable. Sully was disgusted with himself. He was disgusted that he couldn't fix this; that he couldn't make this better for her… for them, but more than that he was disgusted that he sat here, in this room with Matthew and Colleen each lost in their own thoughts. They each were living in their own private Hell, transversing the what ifs of the worst-case scenarios. They each were suffering together, but desperately alone, and Sully didn't know how to change that. He didn't know how to unite them in their pain. Michaela would know. The thoughts were there and gone before he could prevent them, leaving an aching hole in his chest. What would you do?

Turning his head from where he was staring hopelessly out the window, Sully scanned the little bed as if looking for the answer to his question.

Earlier that morning Dr. Bernard had whisked Dr. Mike into surgery, hoping that they could remove the damaged kidney before the inflammation spread into her blood stream. As of now, no one was sure if they had succeeded or not, but there was hope. Michaela's temperature had all but gone away, settling in at a slightly elevated 99 degrees. However, it had been eight hours and there was no sign of her waking up. Bernard didn't seem to be too worried. "Her body has been through a lot. Sleep is its way of recovering from all of this," he had said when he came to check on them, but that didn't prevent them from worrying. That didn't keep Sully's mind from wandering back to the year before when he watched Brian lay in a coma in Dr. Mike's little upstairs room. Sully narrowed his eyes to the steady rise and fall of Michaela's chest. Just keep breathing. Fight for us.

A sudden creak broke the usual silence that had filled the room for the past three hours as Matthew stood. Anxiously, he shoved his hands in his pockets before pacing the floor. He was just as uneasy as Sully, feeling as though he had let his siblings down yet again. Walking toward the wall, Matthew stopped and turned before making the track once more across the room. The lazy spell that had permeated the room seemed to be broken with the alien movement, grating on nerves as the sound of his footsteps pounded against the floor.

"Matthew sit down!" Colleen snapped raising her hands to her eyes. Her head was beginning to ache. She was hungry and sleepy, and the little cot that one of the nurses had brought into the room a few hours ago looked so tempting, but she just couldn't bring herself to rest.

"I can't just sit there anymore."

"Walking around isn't going to fix anything!"

"Well it's not going to make anything worse."

"It's making me worse!" Colleen cried into the stuffy little room, her voice squeaking at the end and making Sully flinch. Rising from his chair, Sully tempted to smooth the situation over. He made his way over to Matthew, placing a gently hand on the boy's back, he spoke to him in hushed tones.

"Why don't ya get outta here for an hour or two? Get ya somethin' ta eat maybe get some rest."

"I… I can't Sully…I ju-" Matthew paused mid sentence, his eyes shifting to a point beyond Sully's shoulder. Sully watched as the boy's lips curled into a thin smile. "Ma!" Matthew cried out, brushing past Sully and coming to rest at Dr. Mike's side. As Sully followed Matthew's eyes to the little bed, he felt tears spring to his eyes and heard himself actually laugh.



"Ma!" Matthew repeated once more grasping desperately at his mother's soft hand.

Michaela turned her head toward the gentle coaxing and drank in the familiar features of her son's smiling face. She returned his smile. "Hey." She whispered hoarsely, taking the opportunity to look around the little room. She was like a newborn, experiencing the world for the very first time. Yes, her head was a little foggy, but she could think clearly and she no longer felt like she was trying to move through mud. She was feeling so much better.

"Dr. Mike!" Colleen's head suddenly appeared in Michaela's line of vision, causing her to smile more.

"Oh Colleen…" She reached out to cup her daughter's cheek. "It's so good to see you." Laying still, she accepted Colleen's kiss on her cheek.

"You don't feel like you're running fever anymore." The young girl determined, smiling broadly. Matthew felt his heart soar.

"How are ya feelin'?"

"Much better actually. How are you?" She reached out and tapped him on the cheek before splitting her attention between him and Colleen. "You look tired."



"Really? Cause it don't feel like it." Matthew brushed off his mother's worried gaze, sharing a secretive look with Colleen.

"So you say…" Michaela smiled at her children. They were so brave. She couldn't imagine being any prouder of them, but they had help. Furrowing her brow she struggled to look around the room. "Where's Sully?"

Matthew turned quickly to where he left Sully by the door, but the older man was no longer there. The door, however, stood open in his place. "I bet he'll be right back. He'll want ta see ya feelin' better."

"Yea," Colleen agreed, "If you think we look tired you should see him. I don't think he's slept in the past forty-six hours." Giving in to temptation, she leaned in and gave her mother another quick kiss to the forehead.

"I'm sorry I was so much trouble."

"You're not any trouble. We're just glad ta see ya feelin' better." Michaela could see the dark cloud fall over Matthew's face as he remembered the past three days. She had no idea what had happened, and had a feeling that she would never know everything that went on, but that was over now. Now only brightness lay ahead. Squeezing Matthew's hand, she smiled at him, understanding that fear in such uncertainty.



"Ma!" A new, sluggish voice fluttered into the room and Michaela felt her heart flutter. Looking up, she say Sully appear in the doorway carrying little Brian close to his chest.

"Brian…" Michaela felt her cheeks burn she was smiling so brightly. Gracefully, Sully moved to the little bed and, pulling the sheets back, deposited the young boy next to his mother before covering them both up again. Pausing for just a moment, his eyes locked with Michaela's. It took every effort in his body to pull himself away. There was time for this later, right now she needed to see her children.

"Ma, I was so worried." Brian whispered into her ear, snuggling close to her side. Michaela stiffly wrapped an arm around him, pulling him closer as she spoke.

"Let me look at you." She lifted her hand to the bandage that wrapped around his head. "Does this hurt?"

"Not much anymore." Brian yawned. "The nurse just gave me some more medicine. She said I could go home tomorrow."

"I think we'll all be going home soon." Matthew said smiling at his little family, together once more.

"You look sleepy." Michaela poked on her son's cheek, tucking the blankets around his little body. In all honesty, her eyes were getting heavy as well.

"Uh huh…" Brian murmured causing everyone else to laugh. Turning to Matthew and Colleen, Michaela raised her brows a little.

"Do you think we could all rest now?"

"Yea" Colleen smiled, laughing actually, before kissing her mother one last time. It was over, she could barely believe it. Standing, Colleen turned to face Sully, who was hanging back watching them interact. She smiled at him. Yes, they would all be able to rest now. They would sleep as they never slept before. Just as everyone was settled, though, Brian, with eyes half closed, turned to Sully, yawning as he spoke.

"Hey Sully. Ya didn't tell me how the story ended."

"Story?" Michaela's eyes rose, searching to be filled in. Brian, of course didn't miss a beat.

"Yea, Sully was telling me a story last night. It was about a Cheyenne named Young Bear an' there was a stampede. He was the only one who lived, but he was hurt real bad." Sully took a few steps closer to the bed, adjusting the sheets around Brian and his ma as he thought of the end of the story. As he began to speak he looked not to Brian, but to Michaela, choosing to tell her the end of the story instead.



"He eventually made it home, safe and sound. His ma was still waiting on him; she had never given up on him. She always knew he would come home."

Yawning once more, Brian closed his eyes. "That's a good ending."

"Yea, it is."

The sun had long set behind the shadow of the tall mountain, illuminating the sky in a bright blue while the world beneath began its descent into the dark night. However, this was not a damaging darkness, this darkness would heal, replenish.

It was the first time in nearly six weeks Michaela was home, and it felt good. She hadn't realized how much she had missed Colorado Springs. She missed the people and the laid back day-to-day activities. She missed the mundane chores that filled her life, and the comfortable little bed with the warm blankets and soft pillows. She missed her home. Leaning with her back to the homestead, she watched as lightning bugs drifted in and out of her line of sight. Somewhere in the distance, she heard an owl hoot. She tried to hear and see everything that surrounded her that made this home as she struggled to ignore the slight pain radiating from her midsection. She had done well today. No medicine at all, the willow bark helped most of her discomfort and although she wasn't capable of doing many chores, she had managed to spend most of the day out of bed. Yes, today was a good day. Perhaps she'll take a little laudanum before she went to bed.

Hearing the door shut beside her, she didn't have to look to know that it was Sully. The children had long since retreated to bed.

"I thought you'd be needin' some of this." He said, handing her a cup filled with tea, willow bark tea. "Ya sure ya shouldn't be sittin'?"

"No, I want to stand a little longer. Once I go to bed I'll get stiff again."

"Ya have ta start everythin' over again." She turned her head to him and smiled.

"It's getting easier." She reassured. Michaela watched as Sully looked down to his own teacup before speaking. Something was on his mind.

"Ya know everythin' I told ya was true. I meant all of it."

"And I meant everything I said as well." Sully looked up to meet her gaze, leaning his shoulder against the same wall as she.

"How exactly do we do this?"

"Courting? I suppose we'll start slow, take it a little each day."

Sully smiled. "It'll be like startin' over again."

"Yes, but it'll get easier." Michaela matched his smile, understanding that they had just come full circle. She gazed into his eyes, losing herself in the joy that he gave her. She wasn't even aware of the way she leaned into him, her lips unconsciously seeking his or the way his head ducked to her, but she was aware of the precise moment their lips touched. Sparks shot through her body, warming her from the inside out as she leaned further into his embrace. Michaela could feel his strong arms wrap around her waist, steadying her on her feet as his soft lips pressed against hers. His harsh whiskers tickled against her soft skin. His familiar scent of buckskin and cedar surrounded her holding her in a safe embrace of its own. Neither daring to go further in such unfamiliar territory, they both broke apart ,smiling contently at the hopes that were turning into dreams before their very eyes.

Sully laughed. "Ya better get inside 'fore your ma comes lookin' for ya."

"Ugh," Michaela groaned in protest, "Don't remind me."

"It'll do ya good. She'll be a lot of help while she's here."

"I know. I just… I was hoping for more time so that we could talk" Leaning down, Sully gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"We'll have all the time in the world," he said, mentally adding, 'we have the rest of our lives.'

Michaela became aware of a vague tugging at her side and the cool air hitting her arm. Groggily opening her eyes, she found Sully and Matthew leaning over her.

"What's wrong?" She whispered, half afraid that she once again was running fever. I don't think I can do all this over, she thought helplessly.

"Nothing." Sully was quick to answer. "The nurse said it's time for Brian ta go back downstairs."

"Colleen and I'll take him down." Matthew whispered, shooting a smiling look to Sully before gathering a still sleeping Brian into his arms before turning for the door, leaving Michaela and Sully alone. Matthew knew Dr. Mike had been so anxious to see Sully when they started this journey. She had waited long enough.

Michaela turned to Sully, struggling against the fogginess of sleep that muddled her mind and tried to remember everything she wanted to tell him. "It's good to see you."

"I could say the same for you."

"How did you know to come?"

"Horace got a telegram. They sent out the passenger lists to several of the surrounding towns. He found me in town." Sully watched as Michaela's forehead wrinkled, trying to peace this information into what she already knew. Shifting his weight on his knee, Sully's mind keyed in on this one interesting topic. What did she know. Narrowing his eyes, he tried to judge whether or not to ask this question. He didn't want to cause her any more pain than necessary, but he couldn't resist.

"What's the last thing ya remember?"

"I…" She struggled through the images that flashed before her eyes, struggling to put them into order, to form a story out of the scenes. "I remember Colleen and Matthew leaving for the dining car. We just had a few more minutes left before we would be in Denver. We were almost home. I… I think I fell asleep because I remember the train whistle blowing, and then everything was turned upside down. Everything seemed to crush around us and I couldn't find Brian. It was the most horrendous sound." Michaela moved to brush at a tear running down her cheek. "And then it was all over. It was so quiet, and then I saw…" She paused as she turned to look at Sully. "I saw you. That's the last thing I remember. I saw your face."

Sully fought the lump tighten in his throat. He felt his heart beating in his chest. He never imagined he could love someone this much. Sully could not imagine never having this moment with her; he struggled to bring himself from the dark territory he was walking. No more what ifs, everything would be ok now. Pausing for just a moment until he was certain he could speak he placed a kiss into the center of her palm.

"You rest for just a few more days and then I'm gonna take ya back to Colorado Springs, to the homestead and the clinic. I'll take you home."

Michaela felt her body tingle, as he spoke. He trusted him completely, leaving him to make all the necessary decisions. He would take care of them; he already had, and she would always be in his debt. However, none of that mattered now. They're journey was over; she could see the light at the end of the tunnel and it was beautiful. Now, looking into the deep blue of Sully's eyes, Michaela realized that there was a fatal flaw to his words. She had anticipated the soothing warmth that would envelope her body and set her soul at ease when she stepped off the stage and looked at the Colorado Mountains. She had expected this feeling when she finally made it home, but it had come early. Finally understanding what her heart had been trying to tell her all along, she held Sully's gaze.

"I think I already am home." She watched as the smile on his face spread. Leaning in to her, he placed a gentle, soothing kiss to her forehead before pulling away.

"Ya need ta get some more sleep." He chuckles as he watched her yawn, her body reacting to its premature wakening. "See?"

"I believe you're right." She whispered her eyes dropping closed as she scooted around the bed, hoping to find a comfortable position. Squeezing his hand, she knew he wasn't going anywhere. He would stay right by her side. Content that all was well, Michaela once again let sleep pull her 

away, but this time it was a healing sleep, one that provides strength and promises happy endings. However, just before she released herself into Morpheus' power, her mind struggled to complete one last thought. "Oh Sully I waited to tell you so long." Her words garbled together, causing Sully to chuckle. She was adorable.

"What did you want to tell me?" With one last effort, she struggled to open her eyes. She wanted this to be right, no doubts in either of their minds. She smiled broadly at his dancing eyes.

"I love you too."

The End

Thank you guys for being so patient with me. I hope you enjoyed it!