Another update - kind of fluffy! Hope you're all enjoying my fic! Your reviews have been so awesome so far and every comment means a lot! Thank you and happy reading!

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"In freedom, most people find sin."

Augustus Waters

I don't see her disappear.

At first, I stand there, leaning against the bar with Isaac, necking another shot. When I go to slam the empty glass on the counter, I see her.

Hazel Grace Lancaster stands in the darkened corner of the room, looking mildly uncomfortable and out of place, her fingers winding around her oxygen tube. She stares at the people on the dance floor, a mixture of envy and disgust in her gaze.

I can't help the grin that spreads on my face. It's been a few weeks since I've last seen her, and God knows I've missed her witty comments and serene yet playful smile. She is beautiful, and I enjoy looking at beautiful things. I admire her for a moment before turning to the bar man and ordering another set of drinks.

"Dude," Isaac says, casting me a side glance. "Why have you got this stupid-ass grin on your face?"

I shake my head. "No reason."

When I turn back around, she's gone.

A forewarning shiver slithers up my spine, alarm bells ringing in my head. I nudge Isaac.

"What?" He asks, necking his shot.

"She's gone."

"Who's gone?" He sounds impatient now, but I think he hears the panic in my voice because he pays me full attention now. "Gus, what's wrong?"

I gesture over to the corner where she had been stood. "Hazel. She was just there a second ago."

"She's probably walked away."

"You're not understanding, Isaac." I say, pushing my weight off the bar stool. "No girl with lung cancer can move that fast."

I make my way across the club, pushing and shoving past the other dancers. Isaac calls after me but I don't have time to answer. A horrible chilling sensation has crept over me and I know something is wrong. I keep my eyes peeled for Hazel, in case I am over-reacting, but I don't see her. I didn't expect to.

It takes me another minute to push past the crowd, by which time Isaac is at my side. "Dude." He says, trying to regain my attention.

I am in the corner. I am in the dark corner of the club and she is not here. She is nowhere to be seen. I turn, my eyes seeking the glitter of the purple dress she'd been wearing. I can't see her.

"Isaac, she's fucking gone."

Isaac exhales and I know he is worried now. He knows I don't swear often. He knows I am serious.

"She might have gone out the fire exit." He points to a dull green, glowing sign just five metres away, tucked into an alcove. It is an emergency exit and it's been left ajar.

I yank Isaac's shirt, pulling him along with me as I stride towards the door. He doesn't protest. A sick feeling is building in my stomach and I am grateful that the alcohol hasn't got into my blood stream yet. The last thing I need right now is to be drunk.

I push open the door and stagger out.

It takes me less than a second to process what's happening. Hazel's eyes find mine and they widen with relief and alarm. She struggles against the man that holds her, releasing his hold on her mouth to cry, "Gus!"

I don't know which of us leap into action first, me or Isaac, but suddenly, at the sound of her desperate voice, I see red.

"Get your fucking filthy hands off her, you asshole!" I shout, launching myself off the steps and into the alley. The man steps away from Hazel and she falls, her weight no longer supported. Beside me, Isaac is bellowing a stream of profanities at the man and we stalk him as he backs into the blocked end of the alley. I lunge at the man, and he holds his arms up to block my punches. I want to at least get two clean hits. One for me, and one for Hazel Grace.

Isaac pins him down and I hear a crack as Isaac's fist connects with the guy's nose. A flash of crimson and then blood is everywhere.

"You think praying on a girl with cancer makes you a big man, huh?" He growls, hitting him again. "It doesn't make you strong. It makes you weak. She's a fucking seventeen year old, dying girl! You cold-hearted, cowardly bastard!"

Hearing Isaac defend her seems to awaken the senses in me. I turn around and leave Isaac to the man, sprinting back down the alley towards Hazel Grace. She lies there, still, and a lump forms in my throat.

"Hazel Grace?" I say, kneeling down beside her. Her cannula is dislodged from her nose and I carefully reattach it, inserting the nubbins. "Can you hear me?"

"Augustus..." She whispers and she raises a shaky hand to wipe at her eyes. "I'm fine. I...I don't know how it happened. It was my fault. I was so stupid."

I've never heard her like this. She sounds so forlorn, so tired and fragile. Anger rears its ugly head and it takes every ounce of willpower not to let it spill into my voice.

"Did he hurt you?"

"Um..." She sits up, her voice barely a whisper where she is trying to inhale enough oxygen to let her breathing return to normal. She raises the skirt of her dress and though I want to avert my eyes, I can't. I need to know if she's injured. I need to know if the sick psychopath caused her harm.

Several purple finger marks line the tops of her inner thighs, already forming into bruises. She winces as she prods one and I swallow my fury.

"Just bruises." She says, and I know that she is relieved by that. "If you hadn't have come here..." A sob escapes her throat and I gather her into my arms, my blood boiling with rage at the damage caused to her. I let my fingers brush through her pageboy hair cut, my lips touch her forehead and I hold her close. I don't want to let her go. I don't want to see her like this again.

Hazel Grace Lancaster

Augustus holds me, his muscles taut with rage, and says nothing as I cry. I feel stupid and weak and pathetic, but the shock just seems to take control. We don't speak even as Isaac approaches.

"Where is he?"

"Out cold." Isaac says and I hear a note of self-satisfaction in his words. "The monster deserved it."

I hear – rather than see – him crouch next to me. "Hazel?" He says and his voice is suddenly a lot kinder. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

I close my eyes, fresh tears forming. I can still feel his hands on me. I feel dirty and used and worthless. I swallow my tears and look at him.

"Thanks, Isaac." I say, forcing a smile. "Thanks for being there."

He touches my cheek, a brotherly gesture, and then says, "I'll call the police."

"No!" I say, shaking my head. "Isaac, no, please don't. I don't want my parents to hear this. I just told them how happy I was. I don't want them to drag me home under some exaggerated illusion. They'll think he's still after me. They won't realise that it was just a one-off, wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time kind of situation."

Augustus speaks, his chest vibrating against my cheek. "You should tell them anyway."

I'm not sure which 'them' he's talking about, but I shake my head anyway. "No." I say, setting my jaw. "I don't want anyone else to know about this. I want to carry on living my normal life. Please, respect that."

Isaac hesitates and I know that Augustus holds his breath in thought. Finally, Isaac's shoulders drop. "Fine." He sighs. "The guy has had a punishment anyway."

Augustus lets out his breath, the air tickling the top of my hair. "How badly did you do him in?"

"Pretty badly, dude." Isaac grins, brushing his shirt off. It's completely pointless; it's covered in blood. "I doubt he has any teeth left and I'm pretty sure he'll be temporarily blind for a while."

The boys laugh and I can hear the release in their voices. They're both just relieved that I am safe, that they got to me on time, before anything worse could happen. The sound makes me warm inside and my lips curve into a real smile and unexpectedly I am laughing too. Though I think mine is of shock. Augustus arms tighten around mine and he presses his face into my hair. I cling to his shirt, the both of us laughing in shock and relief, as he holds me.

Isaac goes back to the college dorms. Apparently, I ruined his night and he isn't feeling the fun anymore. I did try to apologise but he waved it off.

"You didn't ask to be dragged out a club, kicking and screaming, and then sexually abused in an alley." Isaac points out. I wince at the words 'sexually abused,' thinking them too harsh, but then I realise that is exactly what happened. It may not have been rape, but it could have been, and it was sexual abuse against my consent. The shock has worn away and now I just feel cold and empty inside.

"Do you want to go back to college?" Augustus asks me. I shake my head.

"I can't go back just yet. I need to calm down."

We leave the alley – and the unconscious pervert – behind as we head out into the street. Augustus wraps his brown jacket around my shoulders, worried at my constant shivering. It smells clean and masculine – like him. I bury myself in it, wrapping it around myself as I inhale the scent the same way a drowning man would suck in his first breath of air.

Augustus wraps his fingers around mine, squeezing firmly, as though he is afraid of letting me go. We walk the streets of the city, observing it's half-awake atmosphere. The night's sky makes all the lights seem that much brighter and at some points, I find myself squinting.

"Okay?" Augustus asks me, his blue eyes concerned. He's checking on me, ensuring I'm alright.

"Okay." I respond. I smile at him, trying to show him how content I am to be in his company. There's something about his presence that calms me, soothes me.

"I'm sorry that happened to you."

"I'll never understand why the human race feels the need to apologise for something that isn't their fault." I say gently.

"You make a sound point, Hazel Grace." He grins. "But I still wish it didn't happen to you."

"It happened to me because I was the only one in that club that wouldn't be missed if I was abducted." I stop and sit on the kerb of the pavement, watching the traffic go by. I get a few beeps from taxis and such like, but otherwise the drivers ignore me. After a while, Gus sits beside me, his arms resting on his knees. "All the other girls had friends, boyfriends, siblings they could go back to. I had no one who would notice I was gone."

"I noticed." He responds, his blue eyes staring into mine. "I always notice you."

"I am so thankful that you did." I whisper, staring as the traffic whizzes by. "Thank you for doing that for me."

He chuckles, running a hand through his mahogany hair. "At this point, there isn't much I wouldn't do for you, Hazel Grace." He says, "For better or for worse."

A small stretch of comfortable silence lasts between us. "Mum called."

"Earlier?"

I nod. "She wants to meet you."

I can see the slow, satisfied, crooked grin spread across his face in the corner of my eye. "Does she now."

"Hmmm." I say, non-committal.

"How did she even know who I was?"

"I may have told her that you dragged me to the top of a cliff-"

"Kicking and screaming."

I nod. "And you took me to a barn dance-"

"Technically, I didn't take you. You met me there."

I roll my eyes. "And then you took me to an empty theme park at midnight." I finish. "And to top it all off, you've spent the last four weeks distracting me from my learning by that freaking pen of yours. She was curious to say the least."

He laughs, the sound rich and full. I giggle alongside him and then we're both crying with laughter, in hysterics, sat on a city pavement in the early hours of the morning.

After finally sobering up, Augustus nods. "Well, my parents' wedding is on the Saturday at the end of the February holidays."

I nod but I'm disappointed. He can't come.

"So I guess I can stay at yours for half of the holidays if you promise to stay at mine for the other half."

I gape at him. "What?"

"Mum and Dad said I was allowed to bring a guest to their wedding." He smirks. "The invitation specifically said, 'To the best son in the world, Augustus Waters, you are hereby presented with an invite to our exclusive wedding in Dubai and are eligible to bring just one guest only.'"

And then somehow, the tickets are in his hands. I blink, completely shocked, unable to process what's going on.

"I've had them on me for quite some time now." Augustus admits. "I wanted to ask you back when we went to theme park but...it wasn't the right time."

"Now is?" I ask but the words don't come out. "What about Isaac?"

"I don't want Isaac with me. He hates weddings anyway." He murmurs. "No, I wanted you."

He hands me the invitations and I read the fancy, luxurious writing on the thick, cream card. The invitation doesn't declare all that Augustus claimed but they were addressed to Augustus plus one.

"Have you asked your parents?"

"Yup." He nods, appearing laid back. "They were surprised, to say the least, because they'd never met you before. But they supported my decision, if that was what I wanted. They're curious to meet you now."

I don't say anything.

"So, Hazel Grace," He clears his throat, and his eyes are nervous. "Do you want to go to the wedding with me?"

I bite my lip, prolonging my answer for as long as possible. "Okay." I say, smiling. "But only if you meet my parents first."

He grins and the happiness he shows is genuine. He runs a hand through his tousled hair, lying back on the pavement. He is careful not to stick his legs out into the road, though. "Okay." He says. "Hazel Grace, you have a deal."

Augustus and I walk around the city for most of the night, talking together and admiring the sights. We grab coffee from the twenty-four-hour cafe and roam the place, laughing and enjoying each other's company.

"It's going to rain." I say, staring up at the dark clouds rolling in front of the moon. Just as I tug Augustus into the nearest burger-bar, thunder cracks and rain falls. Eighties' music blasts from the juke box, and red and white striped tables dot the room, completely empty. The style retro and hip. Augustus, completely at ease, calls out to the dozing woman at the counter.

"One classic burger and one veggie, please!" He calls and the woman mock-salutes him, eyeing him up flirtatiously.

"Coming right up!" She seems to slide to the kitchen and it takes me a moment to notice that she is on rollerblades.

Rain patters outside and Gus smirks at me, a mischievous glint in his eyes. Before I can blink, he pulls me out of the cafe and into the rain. Instantly, we're both drenched.

"Gus!" I gasp, feeling the cold hit my skin. I gave him back his jacket a while ago, much to his protests, and now the freezing water soaks my skin. My short hair plasters to my face, droplets sliding off my nose.

"Hazel Grace," He says, "We are not so superior that we shall avoid that which the world offers us. When the world offers you rain-"

"You make wine."

"I thought that was the case for making lemonade when life gives you lemons." Augustus pulls me close, my body touching his. His shirt clings to his chest, his hair dripping water onto my face as I stare up at him.

"What else do you expect me to make with rainwater, Augustus Waters?" I ask and he looks down at me, and his eyes are so soft and his hands are so gentle against the curve of my spine that he takes my breath away. He is so beautiful, so damn beautiful, and I'm just me. Kind of like the way a potato is just a potato and is nothing compared to a shooting star – just a dull nothingness in comparison to something that's infinite in its beauty.

He doesn't respond. He just twirls me slowly and I turn under his arm, a puzzled smile on my face. "What are you doing?"

"Dancing with you." He replies, a smirk curling at his lips. "Because it would be such a waste to let that music play to no one and it is also a waste to let this rain fall unnoticed. You know what else would be a waste?"

"No."

"It would be a waste of an opportunity – choosing not to stand here, in the pouring rain with you."

My chest tightens at his words and I beam at him, unable to ignore how attractive he looks, soaking wet, his hot breath visible in the air. His clothes cling to him, emphasising his lightly-muscled figure and his skin is cold but comforting. He twirls me and sways me and we dance in the pouring rain, kind of like the couples do in movies. He doesn't kiss me, but we come close, his head against mine as we inhale each other's scent. We dance and dance on the pavement outside this retro burger bar to the eighties' music in the bucketing rain until the waitress calls us in irritably, a hand on her hip.

Inside, Augustus manages to coax a towel from the waitress and we both fruitlessly attempt to dry our sopping hair. We munch on our burgers and I am ravenous. It's not the best veggie burger I've had but I don't care. I only care about the boy sitting opposite me, digging into his burger, lounging lazily against the chair.

Eventually, he puts his milkshake down. "Hazel Grace," He says, swallowing. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because you're beautiful." I smirk and he rolls his eyes at my attempt to quote him.

"You never told me what you were afraid of." He says after some time. "I told you about my fear of oblivion. You never told me yours."

I take a deep breath, thinking through my catalogue of fears. It's a pitiful list, but then I guess that's a side effect of cancer. A side effect of dying. What is there to be afraid of when you know it's all going to end anyway?

I lean forward, my heart beating erratically. I say the words almost against my will; they slip out of my mouth and suddenly I can't stop.

"I'm afraid of dying." I say, "Not because death itself scares me, or because I'm afraid of the pain or whatever it is that comes after life. I'm afraid of dying because I'm scared of losing you. Wherever I go, you won't follow. And I'm afraid that I'll never again feel the rest of my short life the way I feel when I am with you."

He stares at me and I bite my lip, looking at my meal with distaste. I'm not hungry anymore. I push it away and Augustus' hand sneaks forward to steal one of my fries.

"You understand how fond I am of you, right?"

"Gus..." I close my eyes. "Please don't make me feel any worse than I already do."

"Grief doesn't change you, Hazel. It reveals you." Augustus murmurs. "I cannot claim the same. The turmoil of grief I will feel when I wake up to a world duller than it originally was because you are not in it...I can't describe it. The pain will be astounding."

"That's the thing about pain." I say, quoting him. "It demands to be felt."

"It's true." He inclines his head. "But without pain, how could we know joy? Though it is true that they are completely different things, I know that without the pain of your illness, of the knowledge that one day, you are not going to be here...without that pain, I could never fully feel the joy that comes with spending time with you."

"You never know what you have until it is gone."

"Except with you, I fully realise." He leans forward, his hand touching a wet lock of my hair. "You give me the worst pain in the world, and I know there will be more. But you also give me the greatest joy there can be. I can't compare it, Hazel Grace. You are the shining light in the bleakest of darkness. And that radiance," He says, inhaling slightly, "Is all I can see whenever I look at you."

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