Disclaimer: and a pretty white pony, and a Mercedes for my Dad, and….
Infusion of Gurdyroots and Dirigible Plums
Teddy was getting bored. After the first week of vacation, what with being congratulated by everyone for his standout marks in Charms and Defense Against the Dark Arts, scolded by his grandmother for his awful marks in Potions and Transfiguration, and lauded by George Weasley for having actually passed everything, things had started getting tedious. Victoire was away with her family on holiday, and wasn't returning until later that day, and there's only so many time you can read "Neddy the Kneazle" to small children without being driven insane.
On the second week of July Teddy was sitting in his room, looking mournfully at the rainy day outside, when he heard a knock at his door. "Come in," he said gloomily, expecting Albus to brandish that dratted picture book at him yet again. He was pleasantly surprised when Martin breezed in, Bridget following in his wake.
"Hi, mate," said Martin cheerfully. Bridget waved at him, smiling. "Your Grandma sent us each a letter saying you've been sulking. So we thought we'd better see what's up."
They both sat on the edge of Teddy's bed. He grinned. "Nothing major. Just bored. I mean, Victoire's away and she's the only one around my own age, so-"
"Ah," said Bridget teasingly, "Victoire." she pretended to faint as Martin roared with laughter.
"Shut up," said Teddy, blushing. "Anyway, she's coming back today, so Gran shouldn't have worried."
"Today?" Bridget asked eagerly. "Maybe that means we could visit Mrs. Scamander once she's back! Do you know where she lives?"
"Yeah, Harry told me," said Teddy. "And it took a lot of cunning to make him tell me without suspecting anything weird, I can tell you."
"We had full confidence in you," Bridget assured him. "So, we've all seen the story, right?"
"Right," Teddy and Martin answered. Martin's copy of Beedle the Bard had looked incredibly tattered and well read by the end of the term; the three friends pored over the Tale of the Three Brothers every spare minute. "I wrote Victoire and she's read it too," Teddy added. "I decided not to bring it up with Harry, though. Too risky."
"Why, exactly, do you think Luna will know about it, though?" Martin asked worriedly. "I mean, I thought you had never heard of anything about the Elder Wand before this, so how can you know who to talk to?"
"Several reasons," said Teddy, who was prepared for this query. "One, this Elder Wand is a really weird story, especially if it's true, and apparently Luna believes in some really weird stuff. Like Blibbering Humdingers and Crumple-Horned Snorkacks. Don't ask," he advised, as his friends' eyebrows raised. "Two, she doesn't sound like the type of person who wouldn't tell us something because we're too young. And three," Teddy paused impressively, "The one time I met her, she had the same symbol on the front of her robes as the picture in the Tale of the Three Brothers!"
There was silence as his friends digested this. Then Bridget opened her mouth, but before she could speak, a cry came from outside the room.
"Teddy! Where are you?"
He recognized that voice; he got up quickly, and was met at his door by a vision of loveliness.
Victoire had always been beautiful, but Teddy had forgotten how stunning she was. She had grown, too, and the result was breathtaking.
Victoire was tall and slender, with waist-length hair of a shimmering, reddish gold. Her big, purple-blue eyes radiated happiness as she threw herself on him in a bear hug. His dazed mind noted the golden glow which shone from her, bathing all she was near in light. Her purple traveling robes brought out the colour of her eyes even more, and though she wore the most friendly, down-to-earth smile in the world, it dazzled Teddy until he was sure the vision standing before him was nothing less than an angel.
"Teddy? Hello! Wake up! Is that what moping does to you?" Blinking, Teddy became aware he had been staring. He blushed.
"Sorry, Victoire, it's great to see you again. It's just… you look different."
"Don't worry, your leetle friend is 'aving the same trouble," said Fleur's amused voice as she wrapped Teddy in a hug. Teddy looked round; indeed, Martin looked as though Jane Adderly had just proposed marriage to him. His eyes were bugged out, his mouth ridiculously open.
"Well, I weel let you get acquainted. Eet eez lovely seeing you again!" Fleur swept away as Bridget held out her had to Victoire.
"As these boys probably aren't going to wake up any time soon, I guess I'd better say hello. I'm Bridget. Teddy's told us a lot about you, and you overhearing those things about the Elder Wand. I suppose you've heard of the plan to go to Luna Scamander?"
Victoire nodded eagerly, apparently quite at ease with Bridget's forward manner.
"We were thinking we'd do it today if that's all right with you. I mean, the more we find out, the better, right?"
"Of course," Victoire said. "I'm glad there's someone talking sense here; Teddy needs it." She shot a grin at Teddy, who was busy trying to wake up Martin from his trance. He wasn't sure why, but it made him slightly angry at his friend that he was so obviously goggling at Victoire. He had always seen boys going into trances at the sight of her, but he somehow felt a little possessive. He was saved from his confused thoughts from Martin coming back to the real world.
"Er… Hi, Victoire! I'm Martin. Nice to meet you!" He attempted a charming grin, that faltered dangerously when she smiled at him.
"Nice to meet you, Martin. Teddy's told me about you. I think it's cool how you're so good at Potions."
Martin blinked at her, and seemed to visibly swell. "Well, thanks. It's pretty easy, as long as you know what you're doing, and-"
"Maybe we should go now," Teddy said hastily, convincing himself the only reason he was breaking up the conversation was to spare Martin any embarrassment. He refused to admit to the tiny ember of anger that had flared when Victoire complimented Martin's Potions skill.
"To Luna's? What does your grandma say, though?" Victoire asked shrewdly.
"Er, well, I was thinking, maybe, we could just, you know, pretend we were going to one of your houses or something, you know, because I don't really think-"
Bridget grinned. "Don't worry. Victoire wouldn't tell, would you?"
The smaller girl looked up at her in fury. "I'm no sneak! Of course not! What do you think I am, Mummy's little girl?"
Surprised and angry, Bridget opened her mouth to retort, but was interrupted as Teddy shuffled them hurriedly down the hall and into the sitting room, calling a hurried, "We're going to Martin's Mum's place, Gran, probably won't be back in a while, Victoire's coming with us!" over his shoulder. "The address is 'Incredibus Cove'," he informed the rest of them in a whisper. "We'll travel there by Floo powder."
He tossed some of the glittering stuff in the flames. As they turned green he stepped inside, shouting, "Incredibus Cove!". Keeping his eyes open, he spun around and around, past fires and grates and-
Thunk.
Teddy fell to the floor and rolled out of the grate as Martin, Bridget, and Victoire jumbled into him, one after the other. He finally managed to push himself up onto his feet, aching where his friends had accidentally hit him.
"Oh," said a dreamy voice from nearby, "Guests!"
Teddy looked around for the source of the voice. He seemed to be standing in a room filled with brightly coloured chairs, tables, and many, many papers. The room was painted a sunshine yellow, with bright oranges, reds, greens, blues, and purples making surprisingly beautiful murals of strange creatures. Animals were wandering everywhere; some like the Kneazles, Puffskeins, Crups, and Fwoopers, were standard wizarding pets. Others- Nifflers, Runespoors, and Jobberknolls- were less common. In fact, Teddy didn't even recognize some of the animals leaping about.
The voice was coming from an over-stuffed armchair which had its back turned from the fireplace. A figure rose from the shockingly neon green chair and turned to face the children, artfully avoiding stepping on the many pets gamboling around her.
Teddy had thought he'd seen some strange things in his life, but never had he seen something as strange and wonderful as Luna Scamander.
She was of medium height, with dirty-blonde hair pinned up messily at the back. Her eyes protruded a bit, and that feature, combined with her pale eyebrows, made her look permanently amazed. She was wearing light blue robes several sizes too big with bizarre objects pinned on; something that looked like an onion, several fangs, a pair of Spectrospecs, small charms made of different types of medals, a cucumber, several tiny manuals, and photographs. She had earrings on that looked like orange radishes and a Butterbeer cork necklace round her neck. Her wand was stuck behind her ear. Birds were perched all over her, Augureys, Diricawls, and Snidgets, littering her attire with feathers. Yet, for all that, Luna was still beautiful. Her eyes, silvery and mysterious, gave her an ethereal look, and her slender grace made you think of a ballerina. The good looks she possessed were of the kind rarely seen; the more you looked at her, the more you saw to be enthralled with. In her own way, Luna had a beauty to rival Victoire's.
"Why do you have a cucumber?" Asked Victoire, by way of a greeting.
"It's in case a Kappa tries to kill someone, Victoire," said Luna seriously.
"How do you know her name?" Teddy asked, too shocked to be polite. Luna turned her pale, startlingly beautiful eyes on him.
"Because she looked like Fleur Delacour," she informed him, smiling a little. "And you're Teddy Lupin. But I don't know who the other two are," she added, suddenly frowning. "Unless… Susan Bones was in the DA with me, and you look like her." she told Martin, who looked taken aback.
"Yeah- I'm Martin." He shook her hand, eyeing her as though she should have been in St. Mungo's, getting a god course of shock spells.
"And… you seem to be like Wilkie Twycross." She told Bridget. "He taught me Apparation. He wasn't a very good teacher. I didn't like him much," she added thoughtfully.
Bridget nodded. "You're right. I'm Bridget." She took Luna's hand and grinned.
Luna beamed back. "Sit down, everyone. I love having guests."
All four sat down on an incredibly long, purple sofa, feeling rather disoriented. Victoire leapt up with a startled shriek from her place next to Teddy, having accidentally sat on a Mackled Malaclaw. Luna rescued the crab-like creature, sat down on the floor in front of them, and smiled up.
"You can sit on the couch, too," Teddy offered, feeling guilty, but Luna shook her head.
"Oh, no, the Wrackspurts don't find you as easily when you're sitting on the ground," she said cheerfully. "Now, what can I get you?" she pondered aloud. "How about an infusion of Gurdyroot?"
"That sounds good," said Bridget, who seemed to have taken an instant liking to Luna. "Really good. We have a few questions though."
"Questions?" Luna didn't seem perturbed in the least. "Of course. What questions do you have?"
"Well, you've got to promise you won't tell Harry or anyone else what we're about to say," said Teddy, hoping he wasn't being rude. He shifted uncomfortably, and his hand brushed someone else. Looking quickly down, he realized he had accidentally touched Victoire's hand. He looked away, trying not to blush. Why was Victoire making him feel so embarrassed?
"Will it hurt him, what you are about to say?" Luna demanded, suddenly much fiercer and less dreamy than a moment ago. She scanned the crowd of children like they had been personally responsible for the killing of the animals her home seemed to be a haven to.
"No," Martin said hastily. "Of course not. We only don't want them to know because they'll tell us to shut up and mind our own business, and we hate that. We want to help Harry."
"With what?" asked Luna, relaxing and now simply looking vaguely interested.
Victoire recounted what she had overheard, and how Bridget had discovered it was the Elder Wand. Luna tilted her head, frowned slightly, and pressed her orange-radish earring to her temples.
"My father believed in that greatly," she announced finally. "The Deathly Hallows. And I believe Harry Potter united all of the Hallows when he defeated Voldemort."
Teddy felt the world spin as he sat, stunned. Harry? The same Harry who, three days ago, snorted tea out his nose when his two-year-old daughter mispronounced Quidditch pitch? Harry was the master of Death?
"A-are you sure?" he stammered at last.
Luna fixed him with a pale stare in reply. "Yes. I am sure. There are many rumours about Harry Potter. Being the daughter of the editor of the Quibbler, I can usually tell whether or not rumours are true. I have been under the Invisibility Cloak. I saw Harry take the Elder Wand from Voldemort. It only stands to reason he has the Resurrection Stone."
His mind whirling, Teddy protested, "But his wand is holly…"
"You can have a wand and not use it," Luna pointed out mildly. "I suppose people are trying to steal the Deathly Hallows from Harry, now. That isn't very good, is it?"
"Probably not," agreed Martin slowly, as if talking to a very deaf person, staring at her in disbelief.
"Well," she said, seemingly not at all agitated at the thought of unbelievably powerful objects being forcibly stolen from one of the most famous wizards of all time, "I suggest we think about what to do. I will call my husband."
She got up, humming and waltzing her way carefully around the floor. Disappearing into the kitchen, which they could barely see through the open door at the other end of the room, she called softly, "Rolf? We have visitors! Nice ones! They want to help Harry Potter!"
A fine, hearty, cheerful baritone voice answered her. "Well, then! I must meet them, Luna-my-love! Onward ho!"
There was the sound of boots clumping down stairs, then Luna glided back towards them, her husband following closely. Rolf Scamander wore brown robes, which stretched across his huge chest. He had enormous hiking shoes on, and they stuck out from under his robes. He was very handsome, in a bearish sort of way. His tanned skin, coupled with his brown hair, moustache, beard, and eyes, looked a little overwhelming next to his wife's paleness. However, the couple had a rightness together; Rolf might have looked like King Arthur, but there was something slightly zany in his warm eyes.
"Hello, my little Rosalind," he crooned, picking up a Runespoor. "Bite your right head off if you want to. I don't like it either."
He looked up, noticed the little crowd sitting on his couch, and smiled. "Ah! And this is-"
"Teddy, Victoire, Bridget, and Martin," Luna supplied, pointing at them each in turn. "And they've come here with a problem." She admirably outlined the circumstances which had so concerned them. "What do you think we can do?"
"Well," said Rolf thoughtfully, stroking his beard, "There's only one thing I can't believe."
"What?" asked Luna, sounding mildly hurt. Teddy didn't think it was that hard to predict; Deathly Hallows, after all, are not something you hear about every day.
"I just can't believe that you haven't given them Dirigible Plums," the big man said. "It will help them except whatever comes along."
"You're right!" cried Luna. "I'll go get some from the garden. I know- why don't we give them a Kneazle?"
Rolf nodded with great enthusiasm. "Go along there, dear. I'll give them Portia!"
As Luna bustled out, muttering something about earrings and she couldn't believe she hadn't thought of it, her husband beckoned them closer. "You all know about the astounding magical abilities of a Kneazle?" he whispered conspiratorially. When they all nodded, he brought out a small, cat-like creature with light grey fur flecked with black. "This is Portia. We are giving her to you. Kneazles are incredibly helpful when you are in peril. Luna helped me with my research on this. Portia is a remarkable animal. Take her."
There was such goodwill in Rolf's eyes, and such longing in Bridget's, that Teddy couldn't refuse. "Thank you," he said quietly. "I think Bridget will take care of her." Bridget scooped the purring Kneazle up into her arms, looking delirious with happiness.
Luna rushed back in through the kitchen. Her arms were full of the orange radish-like objects that were hanging off her ears. "These," she said, her eyes bulging excitedly, "Are Dirigible Plums. They will help you accept the extraordinary. Earring for the girls-" she passed the dubious-looking Victoire and Bridget a pair of Plums on hooks each, "And necklaces for the boys!" Martin and Teddy accepted the plums on a string, trying not to laugh. They would look ridiculous if they wore those to school…
"Will you stay for dinner?" Luna asked politely. "We're making Gulping Plimpy casserole with broccoli. Even Witch Weekly called it a 'very interesting concoction' when they interviewsd us! Will you try some?"
"I'm sorry," said Teddy, looking at the clock on the wall and feeling suddenly alarmed- it was much later than he had thought. "Gran doesn't know we're here, so we'd better be heading back soon."
Luna and Rolf nodded sadly in agreement. "Better not upset Andromeda," Luna conceded, but insisted that they have some Infusion of Gurdyroot before they go.
Rolf hurried away to get the drink, calling excitedly over his shoulder, "I made it! Luna says I'm getting better!"
"He is, too," Luna informed them, pride evident in her voice. "At first it tasted horrible, but now it's perfect."
Rolf strode back in, scattering the birds zooming around as he levitated a teapot, mugs, sugar, and spoons toward the cluttered table in front of the sofa. "Here, help yourself!" he called. Teddy picked up the teapot and poured the purple liquid out for everyone. It seemed cool enough to drink, so he took a sip.
Then he sprayed it out over the table. It hit Luna in the face.
"I'm so sorry!" Teddy gasped, horrified. After all they'd done, too. "I'm-I just wasn't prepared for the flavour to be that- that- intense!"
It had been the worst thing he'd ever tasted. But they didn't need to know that.
"It's all right," said Luna, vanishing the purple juice on her face with a wave of her wand. "It takes some getting used to. Do you want to leave, now? You're all starting to fidget."
"I'm sorry- it's just, we're worried that our families will get worried, and the we'll get in trouble, and-"
"It's quite all right," Luna said serenely. "The Floo powder is on the mantle. I will owl you soon. Take care of Portia."
Bridget gave one parting smile as she stepped inside the green flames, her new pet clasped in her arms. Martin and Victoire followed. Pretty soon, only Teddy remained. "Thank you," he said, "For all that you've done."
"Oh, you are very welcome, Teddy," said Luna happily. "I'm always glad to help you. Your father and mother were lovely."
Teddy blinked back the sudden tears, decided not to respond because of the sudden lump in his throat, and stepped into the flames. "Milky Way Place!" he choked, wondering why he didn't mind Luna talking about his parents. Yes, it upset him, but he was also glad she mentioned them. She understood. She was like no-one he had ever met.
He was just glad Victoire hadn't seen his moment of weakness.
Okay, thanks again for all those who reviewed- they make my world go round! Yay! And, for the first time, I am holding a vote.
Should Victoire Weasley be in Ravenclaw or Gryffindor? The reason Ravenclaw is a serious contender is because a) Fleur sat with the Ravenclaws during the Triwizard Tournament; b) having a main character in a house other than Gryffindor would be an interesting change from the norm; and c) those password questions to get into the Common Room would be really fun to write. I think the pros of Gryffindor are obvious.
Anyway, a big huge chocolate cookies with chocolate chips and chocolate icing to everyone who reviews, and add a big glass of chocolate milk to anyone who reviews AND votes.
I love you all!