Joss opened her eyes and gave the room a blurry look around. She heard gentle sobs and then her mother and son were in her line of sight. "Hey," she croaked, which was barely audible but seemingly enough for her mother and son.

"Mom, oh god," Taylor leaned over, rested his head into her neck and cried.

"Oh my baby is awake!" her mother sobbed as she leaned over on the other side.

"Momma, Taylor," she whispered as her own tears welled up in her eyes. She had missed them so much. Joss weakly lifted her arms and wrapped them around them, wanting to comfort them as they were crying. "I've missed you two so much," she said rough with feeling.

"We missed you more, mom," Taylor said, muffled, his face still buried in her neck as she felt his tears wetting her skin. Joss just laid there basking in the feel of her mother and her son in her weak arms. After several minutes they both pulled back and her mother wiped her eyes for her so she didn't have to struggle to reach up weak hands to do it.

"Jocelyn, you gave your boy and me quite the scare. When Detective Fusco called me up to tell me you really were alive I think I started to live again," her mother admitted.

Joss smiled softly as she kept a weak hold on her son's and momma's hands. "How long have I been out?" she asked.

"Two days but the doctor wanted you to rest. They found a bladder infection but otherwise you were checked out clear besides from being severely dehydrated, you were one step away from your organs shutting down and you've been on an IV since getting here. You and that other woman are lucky to be alive. You are so lucky that a Detective Riley wanted to go over your case, having found something that didn't make sense," her momma said softly.

Taylor smiled. Detective Riley, aka Mr. Badass, he had missed him so much. He was still very much the same as he remembered him before he disappeared with a cryptic 'I'll be watching, Taylor' and that was the last he saw or heard from him until two days ago. He couldn't thank John enough for bringing his mother home. Taylor didn't remember hugging someone so hard as he hugged John when he entered his mom's hospital room, finding John sitting there with her.

Joss didn't know who Detective Riley was but she was glad because he had told Fusco about it who then told John. John. Where was he? She blinked as she looked around her hospital room. "Where's John?" she demanded.

Her mother stroked her face as her heart monitor went crazy. "Baby girl, relax, John who?"

"I think she's looking for Detective Riley." Taylor supplied. And Joss eyed her son in confusion. "John Riley, the man that saved you…" her son said.

Riley?—Detective Riley, John was a detective now? "Yes, him, I want to see him…now," she said. "Where is he?"

"He was forced home by friends. That Detective worked tirelessly to bring you home," her mother said.

"Can you tell Fusco for me to ask Detective Riley to come here? I need to see him, please," Joss asked her son.

"Sure, mom," Taylor said as he patted her hand and turned to go do as she asked.

Joss turned to look at her mother. "So…uh, what happened?" she asked, needing to know what the cover story was so she could play it up.

"You were held against your will by that home-grown terrorist group Decima that had an FBI agent on their side, the one that kidnapped you. They had been plotting on attacking our country from within and they had held you and that other woman who worked for the government against your will," her mother said. Joss nodded.

"Everything is a blur," she lied.

"It's okay, darling, it's alright, you don't need to remember anything. Just know that you're safe now," her mother said with a gentle kiss to her cheek. "Everything will be better now. I promise you."

"Thank you momma, I just need to see John and I'll feel better."

Her mother smiled. "He is an extremely handsome man," her mother said knowingly.

Joss smiled gently. "He is," she agreed.

"When you're released from the hospital, I'm going to make a giant meal that this John is invited to and you're going to eat heaping piles of food to fatten you up again, baby girl. You're thin from your ordeal but momma's cooking is the remedy." Her mother fussed with her blanket before kissing her on the cheek.

"I love your cooking." Joss admitted as she yawned heavily.

"Go to sleep, Joss,"

"I need to see John," she argued.

"Dream of him, you need rest to continue to get better. And he'll be here when you wake."

"He's all I dreamt about for months," Joss whispered as sleep tried to tug her away, missing her mother's smile, and she finally let it.

Two days. Joss was back in his life for two days, sleeping, but still she was back. In those two days since they found and rescued Joss he had finally did as suggested: gone home and slept. He slept for a little over thirteen hours before his bursting bladder woke him. He had been irritable to find fresh bandages on his healing wounds which meant Shaw had let herself in to attend to him while he slept. He was a light sleeper and he wondered if she put something in his drink to make him dead to the world.

And every time he went to the hospital to see Joss she had been sleeping. He was afraid she wasn't getting better so he barked at the nurses to keep better watch over her. But Joss's mother, Alice, who was a sweet older version of Joss explained to him that Joss needed rest to recuperate. She was a chatterbox but most likely due to nerves. Taylor was at his mom's side the entire time. Paul had explained the situation to the school and got him a week off to be with his mother. John didn't remember the last time he had been hugged so hard as he was by Taylor. John had blinked the tears away as the kid thanked him for bringing his mom home. John would have walked to hell to find her and bring her home. Taylor knew that.

But since he was told to not come back to the hospital for a few hours, that the nurses needed a reprieve from him, it left him with nothing to do. Sitting with Joss, being with her was all he wanted. He needed to tell Joss how he felt no matter the rejection. But to do that he needed to do something else first and since he had some time on his hands before he let himself back into Carter's room, despite the nurses aggravation, now was good as any time.

John knocked on Iris's office door and felt like a lump was in his throat as he tried to work out what he wanted to say and when the door opened and she stood there the lump grew larger. "Hey," she greeted slowly.

"Hello Dr. Campbell, may we speak?" he said and winced inwardly at how formal that sounded. His phone buzzed with an incoming call but he let it go to voicemail as this needed to be done.

She flinched at the use of her professional name. "By all means, Detective Riley," she reciprocated coolly as she stepped back to let him in and closed the door with more force than needed. "Dr. Campbell?—am I really back to being just your shrink?" she wondered aloud, crossing her arms across her chest. John was retreating further and further from her and she wasn't sure she knew how to stop it. She didn't know what had happened between the time he told her he wanted to share everything with her and their next meeting, but apparently a lot. Because ever since he left that fateful day and she had nervously waited to know if he was alright, a roadblock had formed between them. And she wasn't sure she was ever going to be let through.

"I'm sorry, Iris, I just…" he trailed off helplessly. How did he tell her about Joss? How did he tell her about anything without hurting her?

"You can tell me anything, John," she said with a soft touch to his arm and he stepped back.

He looked down. "I don't want to hurt you, Iris."

"You won't…"

"I will because you care about me," he said.

Iris shook her head. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"It is."

"I beg to differ, John," Iris argued and he just stared at her. "Tell me what you need to and we'll go from there," she offered, seeing emotions swirling in his eyes, pain etched hard lines on his handsome face.

"You always knew I was holding things back from you," he began.

"Yes," she admitted.

"There was something I was hiding from you, but more importantly from myself for a very long time," he said as he looked her in the eyes. "Something that took me a long time to realize and when I did I didn't know what to do about it."

"What is it, John?" she asked gently. Whatever it was might be why he shut her out.

"Remember that detective I told you about," he started hesitantly.

"Yes, Detective Carter, you lost her and couldn't save her and it ate away at you," she recalled, that was the first real thing John had told her during the mandatory sessions and she had seen the vulnerable man underneath the façade he wore.

"For a long time I never could understand what the gaping hole her loss left in me meant. I didn't know what it was until I worked a cold case of hers," he said, turning to look away as he paced her office and ran a hand through his short hair. "I didn't know I was in love with her until it was too late," he admitted as he stopped in front of her desk and eyed the picture of Iris and her cat. "I loved her from the moment I met her and it took me until over a year after her death to even realize it."

"Oh, John, I'm so sorry," she said softly. "Is she the reason you pushed me away?—because you were afraid to move on from her?"

"Yes," he agreed as he turned to face her. "I love her."

"John, she died, you once admitted to me that you don't know how to grieve, so let me help you," Iris said gently as she approached him. She wanted to help him so much. She was in love with John, had fallen in love with him over the course of their sessions.

She had become everything she always promised herself she wouldn't be, she became a cliché and she loathed herself for falling in love with a patient. She tried to hide from it, keeping a cool professionalism, shelving her feelings for John away until she couldn't anymore. She even tried running from it as she ended the sessions with him, which hurt John because he had thought it was because he frightened her. It would have worked had she just not gone to see him in the bullpen and saw that gorgeous blond hugging him long and intimately. A tight ball of jealousy swirled deep inside her as she acted on impulse, storming towards him, determined to make him understand why she needed separation from him. But all the reasons why not faded away when she was with him. Her heart wanted John no matter what the consequences were (and they were hefty). And now, here they were in a complicated and tangled mess. John had emotional problems, trouble getting close, but if she could help him work it out then maybe they stood a chance.

"Iris, she's alive." Iris stopped in her tracks. The look in his eyes and the hopeful look on his face confirmed it, it was true. This woman that he loved was alive. "It's a long story but she was held against her will and we found her. She's a little worse for wear but she'll make a full recovery."

"I'm glad she's alright," Iris said sincerely, their situation put aside immediately. Iris never wanted anyone to suffer. She wanted to help people, which was why she loved being a psychologist. Iris would offer to counsel her but found the idea of counseling the woman John loved too much since she loved him as well. "Does she feel the same way about you, John?" Iris asked, trying to grab a hold of her inner calmness as she felt her heart slowly splintering.

He looked away. "I don't know. But I can't do this to you, Iris. I love her."

Iris felt her heart break as she blinked a few times to keep the tears at bay. "I see," she managed, unsure of what to say right now. She didn't think she could say anything because she felt like her heart was beating out of her chest. She hadn't known how in love with John she was until this moment.

John looked at Iris and felt his shoulders slump. He hurt her. "I'm sorry."

She swallowed hard. "You should tell her how you feel, John." she grasped a hold of her professionalism. "Don't hide it from her," she said as sternly as possible. "If I was her I would want to hear you tell me you love me," she said and all semblance of professionalism gone without a trace as the tears she fought so hard to keep at bay slipped out.

"Iris…" he said helplessly.

Iris shook her head. "John, it's not your fault."

"I'm sorry, I never wanted to hurt you."

Iris shook her head. "You didn't, John. You always think you're this monster, but you didn't hurt me. Circumstances stink but you didn't do anything wrong. We love who we love, I told you once before that love is a basic human need and if there is anyone out in this world that deserves to let himself feel it and have it returned it is you, John," she said heartfelt as she brushed the unwanted tears away. It wasn't his fault she fell in love with him over the course of their sessions. There was something about this man that spoke to her and maybe if they met in a different place and different time maybe she would have been the one that had earned John's love. "I think you should go now. I really need to be alone," she said softly. She preferred to fall apart and mourn the loss of something she never had without him watching.

John nodded and she grabbed the doorknob and opened the door for him. He walked to the door and paused for a moment unsure of what to say or do to help the pain he caused before he exited and closed his eyes as he heard a muffled cry coming from her as she closed the door. He slowly walked down the corridor. His phone buzzed and it was Taylor.

"Hey," John murmured.

"Who shot your best friend?" Taylor wondered.

"What?"

"Nothing, you sound upset, that's all, John."

"I hurt someone," he said softly.

"I bet it wasn't intentional. You wouldn't hurt anyone intentionally, John," Taylor said.

He sighed. "Intentional or not I still hurt her."

"Her?—you were seeing someone?" Taylor asked with a frown.

"Not really seeing. It was complicated." Everything in his life was. He tried to get close to Iris but he failed miserably because he hadn't been able to let go of this kid's mother, who was now alive once more and probably wanted to go back to being just friends. He wasn't sure he could be content with that. Not after everything that had happened since she's been gone.

"Well my mom is awake and asking for you," Taylor said.

"She is?"

Taylor grinned, hearing the happiness in John's voice and knew immediately why this woman and John failed. John loved his mom. He should feel bad for the other woman but he didn't. His mom's feelings mattered more to him than some stranger.

"Yea, she was really adamant about seeing you. Can you come?" Taylor asked.

"I'll be there in five minutes."

AN: I know you guys don't like Iris but I wanted to give a definitive end to Iris/John before John/Joss came face to face. Next chapter is full of Careese as they finally come face to face while Joss is not half-dead :D

Thanks for reading!