Chapter 10

Cuddy couldn't believe her eyes. Staring at her office, she was greeted by the obvious presence of House. Moving further inside, she put her stuff on the sofa, and then started compulsively straightening all the pictures on the wall.

Her attention was caught by the lack of items on her desk. She noticed straight away that her keyboard was missing. Seeing the ransom notes in its place, she abruptly walked out of the office and headed for Wilson's office.

Pounding on the door, she waited for him to answer. Inside, Wilson sighed. There was no point in hiding.

Opening the door, he was met with the calm, sinister smile of Lisa Cuddy.

"H-hi Cuddy…" He stammered. "Did you like the concert?"

"Yes Wilson, I did like the concert. I was not aware however, that it was the final touch to a morning of mayhem!"

"Like I said Cuddy, it was the only way to keep House from going crazy! It worked though! He didn't do anything completely crazy! Just harmless… stuff!"

Wilson could see the wheels turning in Cuddy's mind as she thought it over.

"You're right… but I still need to murder House. Would you be a dear and tell me where he is?" Her sweet tone added to the aura of danger she was carrying.

Wilson hoped he wouldn't pay for it dearly later. "Possibly the roof…"

"Thank you" She said, still smiling sweetly, only her eyes were flashing dangerously.

She closed Wilson's door and went after House. Wilson sighed in relief. Don't kill me, House!

House stood on the roof, leaning on the railing, looking out over the view offered to him. He couldn't shake the image of the way Cuddy was smiling up at him and her nod at his expression of love for her.

Smiling, he watched people out the front of the hospital. He closed his eyes, feeling the breeze and listening to the traffic when he caught the sound of heels, clacking on the stairs.

Opening his eyes, House looked over at the doorway, preparing for her wrath.

Storming through the doorway, she spotted House standing there, his clothes rustling in the breeze, his eyes highlighted by the bright blue sky behind him.

She momentarily froze, completely drawn to the image of him. She saw him smirk. Pulling herself together, she walked purposefully over to him.

"So… busy day, huh!?" She asked dangerously calm.

"Yep!" House replied back with a cheeky smile.

Cuddy wasn't expecting that. She couldn't help the smile that crossed her face.

"I KNEW it!!! I knew you couldn't stay angry at me!!!" House declared, proud of himself.

"Just tell me one thing… Did you or did you not watch porn in the doctor's lounge?"

House sighed "No Cuddles, we did not. Did you hear what I said the password was though?" he added with a grin.

"No…" Cuddy said hesitantly.

House leaned in and whispered it in her ear. She almost forgot to listen, instead focusing on his proximity, his scent and his breath tickling her ear.

He leaned back and Cuddy took a second to process what he had said. Cuddy tried her absolute best to not laugh at his evilness. She couldn't help the small smile that escaped.

House laughed loudly at her amusement.

"Oh good, so the doctor's lounge was free from your madness."

House shifted uncomfortably "Umm.. yeah, sure."

"House… what did you do?"

"We may have… TP'd the doctor's lounge…" he admitted.

Cuddy's jaw dropped "YOU DID WHAT!!!??"

House shrugged "At least we didn't steal the TV or something…"

"Oh yes, speaking of stealing, can I have my keyboard back?"

House smirked. "Why Cuddles, did you read the demands?"

Cuddy sighed. "Fine, you can have time off clinic duty for 3 weeks but you also have to clean up the doctor's lounge."

House thought it over. Holding out his hand he said "Deal".

Shaking it, Cuddy mentioned the other demand House had neglected to mention.

"What about us?"

House looked at her "I meant what I sang, Cuddy. Give me your heart, make it real. Or else, forget about it!" He told her seriously, not about to give up his pride as well.

Cuddy looked at him seriously and nodded, giving him a small smile. House relaxed noticeably and smiled back, more broadly.

"So, wanna grab dinner with me after work?" He asked.

Cuddy laughed at his tactlessness. "Sure House. But first, you have to clean up the lounge!"

"But the contract didn't say when I had to do it!!" House whined.

"No… but your girlfriend said that you have to do it now otherwise you'll be dining alone, mister!" Cuddy taunted him, poking him in the chest.

House smirked at her choice of words. It was nice to hear her call herself his girlfriend.

Nodding once, he gave her one last once-over and headed for the door.

Stopping, he turned. "Oh yeah, since I know you'll be thinking of a way to get back at Wilson, meet me back up here at 5.00 when he leaves."

Cuddy raised an eyebrow in confusion, but nodded her compliance.

Without another word, House left, heading for the lounge, his head and heart a lot lighter than they'd ever been.

~5.00pm that afternoon~

Picking up his briefcase, Wilson left his office and went straight for the elevators. He usually waved goodbye to House, but after selling his buddy out on his hiding spot, he knew he wasn't House's favourite person at the moment.

Passing the nurses station, he saw Brenda looking desperately for the last 'birthday box'. Feeling sorry for her, he went over and said "Brenda, stop and sit down for a second, it'll come to you."

Walking away, he gazed over his shoulder and watched as Brenda sat down in a tired heap, her head resting in hands. She suddenly jumped up. Reaching under the chair, she extracted the last of the black boxes from hell. Throwing it to the ground, she jumped on it, crushing it.

Wilson laughed and left the hospital, heading for his parking spot.

From the roof, House and Cuddy watched as Wilson got into his car.

"What are we supposed to be watching for?" Cuddy asked House.

"Shhh… just watch and listen." House replied, looking expectant.

They watched as Wilson reversed smoothly out of his spot. The relative silence was split by the sound of a car horn blaring. Cuddy looked around quickly.

"What the hell? There's no one else around him! So who beeped!?"

House was chuckling at his brilliance at this point. They continued to watch as Wilson eventually started off again, stopping to let a car which had right of way go ahead of him. Again, there was the car horn. Cuddy noticed that it went for as long as Wilson's brake lights were on.

Turning to House she asked slyly "You wouldn't happen to know why a car horn goes off everytime he brakes, would you?"

House couldn't hold on any longer. He burst out in raucous laughter, slapping his hand on the railing, his laugh getting louder and longer as he heard Wilson breaking repeatedly.

"He was pissing me off today for a bit, so I rigged his brakes to his car horn…" House couldn't finish what he was saying as another fit of laughter took over as Wilson's horn went off again.

Pissing themselves laughing, they both realised that this was the perfect end to a crazy day.

Wilson was seriously confused, but he knew the culprit. Reaching the end of the car park and signaling to turn on to the main road, he cringed as his horn went off as he pressed the brakes.

Suddenly, House's need for a tool box and his new 'horn-basher' nickname earlier made a whole lot more sense.

I'M GOING TO KILL YOU HOUSE!!! Wilson thought murderously, gnashing his teeth together. He knew he halfway deserved it, but then again, he didn't really.

Bloody House! He pulls off a morning of pranks, holds a concert and still gets off the hook… as well as getting the girl of his dreams!!!

Moving onto the main road, braking and cringing, all to avoid smashing into the car ahead of him, Wilson could think:

Damn that clever bastard.

He looked in his rear view mirror at the image of PPTH shrinking in the distance. Feeling some small accomplishment when he saw it.

At least the hospital is still standing…

THE END