Chapter 10

"Cas" I repeated watching the man in front of me crumble. He was fragile looking with eyes wide and body shrunk. As his brother left us alone, I felt myself drawn to him, instinctively holding him in my arms. His body was silent and without shuddering. Whatever he was thinking now eluded me.

"You heard all that." Cas said plainly. He didn't wrap his arms around me but just reciprocated by letting me hold him.

"Yeah… I heard a loud noise from in here. I thought something had happened. Well, something did but…" I trailed off feeling his breathing ease as we parted from each other once again. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to- Cas, I shouldn't have done that. I knew you weren't ready for all this but I just… I wasn't thinking, I was tired and-"

"Dean it's fine. I think it is better now that Gabriel knows. Of course, Gabriel is Gabriel…" His voice grumbled hoarsely and I caught the way his lips turned up so slightly into a smile. "Maybe I should be the one apologizing. I'm sorry, I should have warned you about my brothers at least. Or I should have at least told my brothers no but Michael can be abrasive and straightforward in his work-"

"Cas"

"-and I'm sorry I got you caught up in all of this, I didn't mean for thi-"

"Cas." I interjected again. He stopped to blink at me and I couldn't resist cupping my hands around that scruff on his jaw. "I love you. Now stop apologizing." I kissed him hard, letting my lips collide with his until I could taste him. I could never compare anything to kissing Cas. Not anyone or anything, because nothing felt this good or this right. I let my thumb glide across his chin until I heard the door from the bedroom open from the living area.

I let go of him and leaned against the counter casually as the other sleepy Novak brother entered the kitchen. Upon seeing me he straightened himself a little more and tried to subtly fix his bedhead even though I noticed.

"Dean! You stayed the night?" The man said with a smile that made me all sorts of uncomfortable.

"Yeah, Cas is a good buddy of mine. He lets me crash while I'm here so…"

"Good good. My brother: always the helpful hand." I watched as he took one of the plates behind Cas and start eating. He watched Michael carefully but turned and took the other plate of food and reached it toward me.

"I'll make another for myself, don't worry." He said before I could decline.

Michael pulled me into the other room where Gabriel was lounging on the sofa where I had slept for a fraction of the night. He shifted to let his brother sit but I opted for the recliner away from the two for comfort.

"So Dean, I know it's a bit early, but I do want to discuss a potential opportunity. I believe you know what I am talking about knowing Castiel and all," I nodded my head forcing a mouthful of toast to prevent saying anything, "Yes, well, I would like to hear you sing if that is no trouble. My father's industry has heard well from you and is willing to offer quite a deal."

I shifted in my seat as I swallowed. Though I was set on refusing the offer, I felt too obligated to listen to what he had to say. "Like what?"

"Let's just say, you won't be needing to 'crash' in places for very much longer. We are prepared to sign you with quite a sum of wealth after we hear you sing. But that's just a pre-requisite of sorts."

Of course, I could get that with Benny too right? Sign with people like him in Tennessee. Something inside didn't let me inform Michael of his competitors. Nothing he could offer me could compare to The Grand Ole Opry.

"You should play tonight at that bar…" Gabriel chimed in getting up and then quickly sitting back down holding his forehead.

"Oh. Yeah I could do that…" I remembered that Cas had told me about Ellen's apology and it had me a bit excited as well as nervous. Frankly, I missed her and it was just another thing that lifted the heaviness that had been surrounding me lately.

"Perfect. I look forward to watching you." He said with a well-trained smile that could only be motivated by selfish intentions.

The meal on my plate disappeared quickly letting me excuse myself from Cas' brother's company. I found him in the kitchen still preparing his own food with a nervous pep-in-his-step. "You okay?"

He made grumbled noise with his throat without looking at me. "Yeah, what did Michael say?"

"Just an offer and that I need to play for him. I'll call Ellen later."

"She really loves you Dean. She'll be so excited to hear you again you know." He said finally turning to me and leaning against the edge of the counter.

"I know. It's not really her though, it's everyone else Cas. This is a small town; how long do you think it'll take until word gets around… I just don't want you getting hurt." My hand fell against his shoulder.

"Dean, I've survived off of hurt. Anything further is just annoyance."

The smell was all too familiar to me as I entered the smoky room filled with the dull roar of bar hoppers. I stepped in behind Cas who immediately seemed to move away to greet a face that I had missed too much. Ellen wrapped her arms around my shoulders as I approached much slower. I thought as if everything should be different, that there would still be façade surrounding this place with a stigma that had been left permanently. But the smiling woman let the most welcoming feeling come over me like I was back from a long trip.

"I'm so happy you're back, Dean." She squeezed tighter around me before letting go. I was about to say something back but another figure caught my eye as they walked up slowly behind Ellen.

"Bobby…" I looked at him in awe. The man hadn't changed a day since I had seen him last other than a few added wrinkles and a little something else that twinkled in his eye. He just stopped before us so Ellen could let go of me.

Of course it was intimidating. I didn't know what Bobby thought of me; the father I never had and the man who was there when I needed someone most. He looked down at me with a wall of intensity that I couldn't see through. "Dean." He said with the commandeering voice he had as he nodded his head. His hands flew open, arms out wide.

I couldn't contain my smile as I nearly threw myself at the old man, nearly knocking off his hat. It wasn't a big thing, but it felt big to me; just his approval was enough. "H-Hey Bobby, how's it been?" I asked trying to recollect myself. "How're you and –uhm?" I didn't exactly now how to control myself from the spurts of happiness that came through but Bobby just laughed it off as he patted my shoulder.

"S'been good Dean. Really good… I'd ask you the same but I think I got just about what I can handle. Got an earful from Ellen. Trust me." He winked and looked off to the side and I followed his gaze. I watched as Cas sat next to his brothers at the bar talking to a stranger on his other side. Bobby kept his eyes on the man as he scratched his beard but looked around the Roadhouse for a second before looking back at me with a smile.

Bobby had sat me down at one of the tables and it was there that I listened to his hunting stories with his buddy Rufus and rants about his boss who was apparently an absolute dick. Cas still seemed to be a subject too early to be discussed yet. I didn't blame him though, so I let him wrap his head around it for a while if he ever wanted to talk about him. But, when his name was mentioned… Bobby just smiled.

He started talking about retirement when I noticed he kept glancing around. I'd known the man my whole life and we knew each other's tells like a deck of cards. His fingers tapped against his cold draft before he finally leaned closer to me.

"There's something that you should know Dean…" He whispered low like a secret. "Uhm…"

"Bobby, if it's about Ellen, I already know that you and her are-"

"No you Idjit! It's not about Ellen… It's about…" He put his hand on his mouth like he was searching for the right words to say. My heart started to race like there was something wrong.

My eyes beat him to the answer though. They were fixed on the tall man wandering from the bathroom. The man who locked gazes with me and who thought that shouting my name happily with a wave from across the room was completely okay. That bitch.

I was out of my seat in a second after my jaw snapped shut. My legs took me to him faster than I thought I was capable of going as I threw my arms around my brother and pulled him against me. I admit that I was never a hugging sort of person, but the sight of Sam right here in front of me in the weirdest of situations nearly sent me into a frenzy.

"Sammy…" I gasped over his shoulder like I was afraid he would slip away from me again. I didn't care who gawked at me because this was my brother, and I hadn't seen in him in so long. Too long. When I finally let go of him, his old nostalgic laughter shook his body as he smiled down at me with those big eyes. "What the hell are you doing here?!"

"I'm on a… a break Dean. Just thought I'd come down here and surprise you. And Ellen and Bobby… Man, I heard about all this publicity! Dean that's great!" His big hands were clasped onto my shoulders and I felt a little more at peace with him here.

The atmosphere felt like time had slowed when Sam and I sat down to talk. I leaned forward on my barstool over a beer as we talked about his life at school. I was completely entranced and unaware of my surroundings until I felt Ellen nudge me and say that I had a few minutes until I should start playing so the crowd wouldn't mob.

"So, you're not with Lisa anymore?" Sam said bringing me back. "I uh- tried to call you know. I wasn't planning on this to be a surprise. I didn't know that you were-"

"Yeah it's… Yeah. We just couldn't deal with all this anymore. She wanted me home and I just wasn't. Leave it at that." I said feeling the thoughts creep in again. It wasn't so much leaving Lisa as it was Ben. The kid didn't deserve that.

"Okay, but I'm just saying Dean, it's alright. It's your music-"

"I said drop it." I didn't want to go any further.

Sam sat quietly but I could feel that damn stare he used on me when we were kids when he basically manipulated me every which way. Thankfully he respected me enough to actually let it go though. Maybe it was the beer that was getting me all excited but I felt a little regret for snapping at him.

"Mr. Fizzles senses a little ten-sion." I heard a high pitched voice sound from behind me. I turned to face a sock puppet almost pressed against my face.

"What the-"

"Sounds like someone might have a little drinking problem." The sock's makeshift-mouth moved with the ear piercing voice. I followed the arm that was shoved up into the contraption to a scrawny man with an expectant look on his face.

"Dean. This is my… friend… Garth. He came with me from school. He's my uhm- roommate." Sam said apologetically.

"Huh… I thought you would be taller." Garth said in his normal voice.

I couldn't really believe what I was looking at but it gave me a strong feeling of confliction. I didn't know if I wanted to punch his teeth out or run away. Either way, we stood there for a good awkward few seconds before I just left to the stage.

I could feel someone trail behind me as I made my way through the crowd and before I made it out, a gentle hand spun me around. Cas stood there and just sort of smiled with his hand resting on my shoulder. Of course we couldn't do this here and Cas knew that but… I kind of wanted to. He had a way of making me feel like this.

"Dean. Uhm… Break a leg. And don't worry about my-"

"Cas. Look. I know what I want. And it's not gonna be with them okay? I'll just put on a show, alright?" I leaned in closer to him placing my hand on his shoulder too, "For you." I whispered into his ear.

People were too preoccupied with themselves in the crowd to notice if anything was different about our exchange but that was probably because they were also all drunk. One of the members of the mass of people bumped right into me.

"Woah woah… man. Sorry 'bout that. Wait. Dean Winchester?" I looked at the smaller man for a second and realized that it was the kid who worked at the gas station. And he was completely blitzed.

"Hey, uh-"

"Ash. Remember I was- The uhm… gas guy." He erupted into roaring laughter leaning on my shoulder for support. Cas looked at him and I could read his expression as humored but he eventually pulled away with a look back to me over his shoulder. "You playing tonight?!" Ash brought me back to earth as he stood straight.

"Yeah. I am. Right now actually." I said trying to get around him. He sort of slurred something while mumbling but I couldn't really catch it. I could only smile and nod before stepping up on the stage platform.

My guitar case was waiting for me next to the stool. I pulled the instrument out and placed it on my lap and the room seemed to shush itself as I got myself ready. It felt a little bit like home again as I looked out at the crowd.

"How's everybo-" I paused a moment because the mic in front of me didn't echo my sound. I played with it a little but it didn't really work until I saw Ash from the crowd yell.

"I got this! Everyone! I got this!" He wandered around to the speaker that the mic was plugged into and bent behind it. Another second later he was stumbling back to his seat throwing a thumbs up to me.

"Hello?" I said testing the sound. It was working perfectly fine now so I gave the man a little wave of appreciation. "So, I guess I'll try that again. How's everybody tonight?!" The building nearly shook with shouts and applause. Even though there were a lot of people, it wasn't as full as the last time I was here but I guess I sort of expected that. "Well I'm happy to be back. I guess I'll start out with a song we all hopefully know. Get this started…"

I started strumming fast and the cheers came again under the sound of my guitar.

Well, I quit my job down at the car wash,

Left my mama a goodbye note,

By sundown I'd left Kingston,

With my guitar under my coat…

It even amazed me that I could remember these songs with such a lack of time to rehearse them. But muscle memory was in my favor as I savored the way my fingers glided across the strings without messing anything up. And it was fast; so fast.

Nobody wanted to hire a guitar man.

The crowd erupted every time I finished a verse and I couldn't really help myself from getting caught up into all of it. Despite everything that had been going on recently, this is where I knew I was alive. On stage. There were lights from the stage but I could see a certain face looking back at me with a smile under a light over the bar. Cas sat on his barstool next to his brothers who were also fixated on the performance.

With a swingin' little gui-

My heart nearly stopped and a choke sound left my body as the piercing sound of one of the strings on my instrument broke and curled. I could hear people in the crowd talking but it wasn't them that had my attention. Behind Cas I saw an unforgettable pair of eyes staring back at me a few seats away from him. His expression was emotionless as the color of his sulfur-yellow eyes darted to the man I loved and then back at me. I knew very well what he could be thinking.

I watched the way he sipped on his glass still un-breaking his gaze at me. There was a hand on my arm and there was Ellen coaxing me back.

"Hey, Dean-honey. It's alright we'll get that fixed right up." She said grabbing the guitar from me. I watched her do it but I just couldn't distinguish what was happening around me until I looked back and the man was gone from his seat. Was I seeing right?

"S-sorry about that everyone. Just uhm… technical difficulties. Aha, you know." I tried not to sound nervous as I grabbed the guitar from Ellen before walking off the stage. It seemed like the atmosphere came back to normal but the unsettling feeling inside of me was still there. I walked right up to Cas to see if he was alright.

"Dean, don't worry about it, happens to everyone." Gabriel said as I walked up to the group. It looked like he was well on his way from being buzzed already.

Cas looked at me though and the way his eyes changed meant that he knew something was wrong. "What's going on?" he asked me but I could only shake my head in the presence of his brother Michael who didn't seem to realize anything was actually wrong.

"I just need some new strings. They're in the impala, wanna come help me?" I asked and he nodded as we both left, weaving our way through the crowd. I kept looking but I couldn't see that yellow-eyed man anywhere among them.

The air outside was cold enough to see my own breath. I clambered down the steps with Cas as I popped the trunk to the car. "Dean, are you alright?" he asked leaning against the black exterior.

I looked at him a while trying to let myself relax, digging for the strings. "No. I just- remember the day I left Cas? There was that guy. He told Ellen. And I think I saw the man who found us. He's in the Roadhouse-"

"Hey, Dean! You okay?" Sam came stomping down the steps towards us and I could see him look at Cas. "Oh… uhm…" He said to him.

Cas didn't look uncomfortable but he just extended his hand to my brother politely like nothing was wrong. "Hello, I'm Castiel Novak."

"Hello. I'm Sam Winchester, Dean's brother."

I could feel my chest prick with nerves as I watched the two most important people in my life meet each other for the first time. "Sam! Dean's told me a lot about you! It's wonderful to finally meet you." Cas said very professionally but also sincere.

"I'm sorry, and you…"

"Oh, I'm a- a friend. Of Dean's." Cas smiled shoving his hand back in his trench coat pockets.

"Oh, okay. I'm sorry I just haven't heard a lot. Well, I haven't heard a lot from Dean either so…" He chuckled indicating towards me. I wish that could have expelled some of the heaviness that was linked back inside.

The moment shattered as a scream sounded inside the Roadhouse. Sam's friend with the sock puppet ran out at us with shear panic across his face. "Fire! There's a fire inside the Bar!" He yelled still running until he got to Sam.

"What?! From where?" I asked him shoving the guitar into my trunk as people started running out in hoards.

"I don't know! First everything was fine, but then the stage just suddenly burst! It's spreading fast!"

I was already tearing through the people who were blocking my access back inside but was knocked back as a powerful explosion shook the building, sending a powerful ball of fire through a window on the upper level.

I couldn't believe this was happening.

Notes: Sorry about the wait. Aha again. Just busy but I'm getting them done and I'll promise you that I'm going to finish this!

Songs: Guitar Man by Elvis Presley