Okay, since this is the second update in the space of about 12 hours, I get the feeling that people are going to read this chapter thinking it's chapter 9. So...

THE FOLLOWING IS THE 10th CHAPTER OF THIS STORY, IF YOU HAVE NOT READ CHAPTER 9 (MY GOD, OR FATE, OR WHATEVER) THEN YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON. PLEASE GO BACK ONE CHAPTER AND MAKE SURE THAT YOU'VE READ THE PREVIOUS ONE.

For those of you that have read chapter 9, please enjoy the penultimate chapter.

"JD, there you are." Carla said. She and Turk had been searching all over the hospital for him after his reaction to Mr Ockswell's sudden death. The roof was her last shot, and it paid off; she had opened the roof door to see him sitting on the ledge of the roof.

"Turk." she shouted down the stairs behind her. "I found him, he's here." A few seconds later Turk emerged from the door. He caught sight of JD's position on the edge of the roof, and the cold, miserable expression on his face.

"Dude!" he suddenly yelled. "Don't do it! Don't jump!" Carla smacked her husband's arm.

"Don't be stupid, he's not going to jump……are you?"

JD answered by merely shaking his head. The two made there way over to him. He didn't look at them, instead turning his gaze to the Christmas lights of the city below.

"Hey." Carla said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I know this is a shock, and that you really liked Mr Ockswell, but we're here for you. Right, Turk?"

Turk nodded in response.

"Thanks." JD replied. "But Elliot kinda beat you to it."

"What do you mean?" Turk asked.

"She, er, talked to me after it happened."

"So…you're saying you're okay?" Carla asked uncertainly.

"As okay as I'm gonna be. But that's not the reason I'm out here."

Carla and Turk waited in silence for him to tell them, but he never did. He got up off the ledge and started pacing back and forth.

"Buddy?" Turk asked after a whole minute of pacing.

"It was so stupid." JD finally spoke. "We were having a nice moment, she'd comforted me and brought me back down to earth……and I just ruined it. Arrrgh! I'm such an idiot."

Turk looked completely lost. His wife, on the other hand, was starting to get what JD was saying.

"Bambi…" she started. "…are you saying that you did what I think you did."

Again JD didn't answer, instead he stopped pacing and looked right at Carla. His eyes confirmed what she was thinking.

"You told her?!" she gasped. He nodded, and Turk looked between the two.

"Told who what?" he asked, but JD and Carla ignored him.

"I don't know why I did it, I just did." JD spoke to Carla.

"Did what?" Turk asked, raising his voice this time.

"One minute we're talking about Mr Ockswell, and the next I'm kissing her." JD said and began to pace again.

"You kissed her!!" Carla gasped again.

"Kissed who?" Turk yelled.

"That's not all." JD said in a low voice, stopping his pacing once again and turning away from them to look off the roof. "I told her…everything; and she ran."

"No!" Carla gasped for a third time.

"Okay! Will somebody please tell me what the hell is going on?" Turk demanded.

"I told Elliot that I was in love with her, Turk," JD said, turning back to face him. "and she ran away from me."

Turk's jaw dropped. JD's words seem to hang in the air.

"But…I thought that was just a rumour that the nurses made up."

"Quiet, Turk. I'll explain later." Carla said and moved closer to JD but he stepped back.

"No, this is completely you're fault." he said.

"My fault?"

"I knew this would happen. I knew she would freak out, I told you she would. But, no, you just kept pushing me, telling me 'open up to her'. I can't believe I listened to you, I…"

"Bambi." Carla cut him off. Her voice was firm and showed that he had to listen to her now. "I know you're hurt right now, so I'm going to ignore what you just said. Now, look at me." He did. "Tell me exactly what she said."

JD thought back to that horrible moment. "She…She said that we had been down this road before and that we knew where it ended, and I said that this time I wasn't afraid and…that I loved her. Then she started saying she couldn't."

"Couldn't what?" Turk asked.

"I don't know, that's all she said: 'I can't, I can't'. That's when she bolted."

"And when you kissed her," Carla asked carefully. "did she kiss you back?"

JD had a sudden flash back to the intoxicating feeling of her lips moving on his.

"Yeah, she did." he answered.

Carla nodded like she suddenly understood what happened.

"Bambi, she's just scared. She's exactly where you've been for months. She'll come around."

"You really think so?" he asked. She nodded in reply.

"Just give her time." she added.

A hand waiving in front of her face brought Elliot back to her senses.

"Barbie? You wanna stop daydreaming?" Dr Cox said to her. "I swear to God, some times I think you are just the female version of Newbie…wait, that directly contradicts my 'You're a girl' insults…forget I even said that. Anyway, are you gonna do some work or what?"

As Dr Cox walked away, Elliot ran her fingers through her hair and tried to focus. It was pointless though, her mind was determined to continue to reply the incident in the supply closet.

JD isn't in love with me. Mr Ockwell's death just has him freaked out. I shouldn't dwell on it……or that kiss. I forget how amazing of a kisser JD is and I…NO! Don't even think about the kiss…or the fact that you kissed him back. Why did I ki-- Arrgghh! Just put it out of your mind. It's probably best if you stay away from JD for the next couple of days; give him time to realise he doesn't really love you.

"Barbie, I need you to find Newbie for me." Dr Cox yelled from the other end of the ICU.

……………FRICK!

"It'll all work out, Bambi." Carla said to JD. Turk smiled at him in a reassuring way. Before JD could say anything else, his pager went off. He looked at the message.

"It's Elliot." he said in disbelief. "She wants to see me downstairs!"

"What did I tell you?" Carla said. "Well, what are you waiting for? Go talk to her!"

JD gave one last smile to his friends before sprinting to the roof access door. In a flash, he was in the ICU. His eyes scanned the room till he saw her by the nurse's station, writing on a chart.

"Hey." he said when he reached her. Her eyes moved up from the chart to his, remained there for a second, and then returned to the chart. JD's brow furrowed in confusion. It didn't look like she wanted to talk.

"You paged me?" he asked her to make sure.

"Dr Cox is going to talk to Mr Ockswell's family;" she said, without looking up at him. "he wants you to go with him."

JD's heart sank; that was the reason she had paged him.

"Elliot I--" he started, but she quickly cut in.

"He's over there." she said, pointing to Dr Cox standing outside of the patient's room, firmly keeping her gaze in front of her. Cox was currently motioning for him to come over. With a heavy sigh, JD had no choice but to walk over to his mentor. As soon as she was sure he wouldn't hear, Elliot let out the breath she didn't realise she'd been holding, and watched him walk away.

Later, after the horrible and extremely difficult task of talking to Mrs Ockswell and her two now fatherless sons, JD felt he owed Dr Cox and apology. Once the Ockswell's had left, they were the only people in the room once occupied by Mr Ockswell.

"I'm sorry…about before, they way I reacted." JD said.

"Don't worry about it, Newbie. Happens to the best of us now and then."

"Even you?"

"No, but only because I am the absolute best in the entire world."

"But what about that thing with the three patients and the organs from the patient with rabies where they al--?"

"That was an isolated incident." Cox said. "The point of this conversation is that what happened was no big deal."

JD smiled in appreciation and made a move to leave, but was halted by his mentor's voice.

"Newbie."

JD turned and saw Cox looking like he couldn't believe what he was about to do.

"When things like this happen," Cox said, indicating to the empty bed. "it reminds you how easy life can be taken away. This, combined with a conversation between me and an annoyingly persistent nurse, means that I have to say something."

"Oh my God! You're dying!" JD suddenly said.

"No, I'm not dying you idiot!" Cox snapped. "I just…d'you remember a couple of months ago when we were both given stupid theories from that God-damn shrink? Well, what he said to me…what I've been trying to prove wrong…is…he said that, for all my insults, rants, and the general irritation caused by everything you do, I actually don't…totally…completely hate you."

JD felt a grin creep onto his face. Perry cleared his throat and continued.

"So, for future reference, when I'm calling you girl's names, questioning your gender, criticizing every decision you make, and generally making it look like I don't care about you or Barbie or Ghandi or anybody else, just remember that that's really my way of saying that…I do care."

"Thanks." JD had to say.

"No problem, Newbie."

A few seconds of silence followed, before JD broke it.

"Wanna hug?"

"I don't care that much, Kristin." Cox said, walking out of the room, knocking into JD's shoulders as he went.

Just thought I would have been a nice moment……oh, well.

JD left Mr Ockswell's room and walked right back over to Elliot.

"Listen, we need to talk." he said to her.

"No we don't." she answered swiftly. "You need to spend some time alone and realise that you're just in shock. You're not thinking straight. Mr Ockswell's death has left you scared."

"Elliot, for the first time since I met you, I'm not scared……I really do love you."

"No, JD, you don't." He could see she was trying to shrug him off and ignore him by focusing on the chart in front of her.

"Well, it doesn't really matter whether I love you or not, does it?" JD asked bitterly. "Because you obviously don't feel the same way."

"I didn't say that!"

The words seemed to fall out of her mouth before she had even thought of them. JD stared at her in total shock.

"I don't know why I said that." she tried to cover up.

"Then take it back."

She couldn't. For some bizarre reason she couldn't take that sentence back.

"Elliot," he started, taking hold of her hand. But she quickly jerked it back.

"JD, please!" she whispered

'Please'? She's pleading with me?

"I can't deal with this right now." she continued. "Just…leave me alone for awhile."

She was gone faster than he could stop her.

"Didn't go well?" came Carla's voice from behind him.

"No, she asked me to leave her alone."

"She's just scared, Bambi. Give her time."

"Yeah." he reluctantly agreed.

Carla suggested he go home and get some rest, it having been a long day for him. His shift had actually ended over an hour ago, so he did as she said. Once he was gone, Carla went looking for Elliot. She found her just about to go into a supply closet, but Carla grabbed her and pulled her to an empty doctor's lounge.

"Talk to me." She said to Elliot.

"About what?" Elliot replied, playing dumb.

"You know what. JD poured his heart out to you, why did you run from him."

"Because I didn't know what else to say," Elliot admitted, but then told another lie. "I'm not in love with him."

"Give me a break!" said Carla, not in the mood for the whole denial thing. "You don't think I see the way you look at him when you think no one's watching? You don't think I see how comfortable and free you act when you're with him?"

"You're imagining things. I had to tell him the truth."

"The truth is that JD is the one guy you have never had to put up a façade with, never had to pretend to be someone else with. You love him and you know it. Now, you aren't usually afraid of committing so, what I can't figure out is why you're holding back, why--"

"Because I am not gonna get hurt again, alright?" she cried, catching Carla off guard. "Remember the last time this happened, Carla. When JD suddenly declared his love for me? Do you remember what happened? I got my heart broken. And over the last few months, even though I've tried to deny it, I've felt my feelings for him growing stronger than ever. But I just can't bring myself to take a chance on him again. If he suddenly decided 'Oh, hey, guess what? I don't love you!' again, I don't think I'd get over it this time."

Elliot didn't even realise tears had started to pour. She collapsed on the couch, feeling suddenly drained of energy. Carla sat next to her.

"He was scared." she said to Elliot. "Petrified, actually. And he told himself that he was only idealising you; he was trying to protect himself, just like you've been doing. But this time…I really believe he's ready. He's seen somebody that used to be so alive suddenly die, and he's realised that life is too short. As for you, you can fill out as many magazine quiz's as you want, but you'll never find your soul mate if you don't take a chance "

"Carla, I can't put myself through that again, I won't, I--"

"Elliot," Carla said soothingly, feeling Elliot getting worked up again. "telling me all this isn't going to help you. You need to talk to him."

"You're right." Elliot agreed after a few seconds. "I owe him that. Where is he?"

"He just left" she answered.

"I'll just call his cell and see where he is, then." she said, getting out her out cell phone and dialling his number.

"Hello?" JD answered.

"JD……it's Elliot." she said awkwardly.

"Elliot?"

"Yeah. Listen, we, um, need to talk. Can you come back to the hospital?"

"Of course," JD said. "I…it's just…"

"What?" Elliot asked.

"Nothing, I…I wasn't paying attention and I accidentally took a wrong turn…I'm on the freeway!"

Elliot couldn't help but laugh, and JD joined in. He went on though, "But I'll be there as soon as I--"

JD never finished that sentence, and next thing Elliot heard was a deafening crashing sound.

"JD? JD? JD?!!" she screamed frantically into the phone.

The line had gone dead.

The 11th and final chapter will be posted tomorrow, on Christmas Day. Reviews would be an amazing Christmas present HINT.