A/N: Okay, I know that there is no way that Jack would ever leave even part of his team alone with a Goa'uld (even a crazy one like Thalia), nor would he agree to have a sleep over in her temple. But, trust me, just play along and see what kind of fun they have!
When Jack and Teal'c arrived back at the temple, they were directed by Thalia to the room that the others were in. Daniel had finally dried off enough to not shiver, Janet was checking and re-checking her pack, and Sam was doing a sweep of the small room.
"Lucy, we're home!" Jack called as he and the Jaffa walked in. *Whoa. What happened to you?* He asked mentally to Daniel as the younger man shook his head violently, trying to dry it a bit more.
*Thalia has a mean sense of humor*. Daniel replied, shaking once again and covering the Colonel in water droplets.
*Hey, watch it!* "So, where are everyone's quarters?" Jack asked, looking around the room.
"These are our quarters. Thalia wants to keep us together for 'observation while we recover.' Sam informed him. Jack nodded. He actually preferred it this way, so that he could keep an eye on his team easier. He winced as he heard Sam, Daniel, and Janet's mind begin to talk over top of one another about various things.
*Naquada. Maybe she knows where some is or...*
*Needles- 16 gauge, 14 gauge, 20 gauge, check...oh, and the really really big one to scare the Colonel with...* This, of course, was Janet and Jack glared at her, then turned to listen to Daniel.
*I wonder if she is responsible for the Chinese finger trap... maybe that was someone else...*
"Guys! Stop it! You are giving me a headache." Jack said, and the three stopped as much as possible. He glared hard at Daniel as the man thought, *Maybe she would find taping Jack's mouth shut amusing. I know I would.*
"Alright, well, obviously we have our equipment back. What about our weapons?"
"She kept those, but said she would return them to us at a later time." Sam said. Jack nodded, none too happy about being weapon-less. However, since the rest of the team didn't seem perturbed by it, he relaxed slightly.
"Ok. Well, then what do we do here while we wait to become normal again?" the Colonel asked, already getting bored.
"Don't know, sir. I guess just... Err... Hang out." Sam replied, sitting down next to her pack. Jack took his time to notice the room. It was much like the main room that they had all arrived in, but without the gaudy throne and it held 5 beds all pushed closely together. Retrieving his own pack from the corner, Jack claimed a bed closest to the door and laid down.
"Well, I want one person on watch at all times. Teal'c, then Daniel, then Doc, then Carter, then me." He said, getting comfortable on the bed. They all nodded and chose a bed to lay down on. It didn't go unnoticed by anyone that Daniel and Janet chose beds next to each other, placing Sam beside Jack, and Teal'c got the last bed. He wouldn't use it anyway, so they weren't concerned. Teal'c took up watch in the far corner of the room, facing towards the door and the team as the rest fell asleep.
As Daniel settled in for his watch a couple of hours later, he sat down in the same corner that Teal'c had vacated. He was tired but used to having to be awake and alert at odd hours. Just as he was getting comfortable, he heard a noise come from the other side of the room. His ears perked up (Hey, mine can perk up...cant yours?) as he strained for the sound.
"Daniel? Where are you?" he heard Janet call from the darkness.
"Over here." He whispered and waited as she navigated over to where he sat. She plopped down beside him and leaned back against the wall. "Can't sleep?"
"No." Janet shook her head. Daniel studied her closely and saw the dark lines under her eyes. She looked like she was either about to pass out or cry.
"You ok?" He asked, already knowing the answer.
"Yeah, fine. Just...can't sleep." Daniel remained staring at her as her eyes closed.
*I would give anything to have her lean against me.* He thought to himself, glad Jack and Sam were asleep and couldn't hear him. He knew they were asleep because of all the wild and weird things going through his mind.
*Run away, bunnies! Run away!...*
*London bridge is falling down...*
*Run bunnies! The bridge is going to collapse! It is supposed to be made of Naquada, I don't understand! RUN!*
*It isn't made of Naquada, it is made of bananas! No wonder it is falling down!*
Daniel nearly laughed out loud as their dreams mixed and became one. He was pulled out of his reverie, however, when he felt a solid weight ease onto his shoulder. Looking down and over, he saw that Janet had indeed fallen asleep on him. *Hmmm, maybe she heard me*. he thought. Not arguing, he carefully wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Janet murmured in her sleep and snuggled closer.
"Daniel pillow. Nice. Can't wait..." Janet sighed, unknowingly having told Daniel more than he ever thought he would hear. He pulled her closer and held her as he relaxed into his watch.
*Definitely the best watch I have ever had*. he thought.
Thalia watched from the other side of the room with a grin. She had had very little hand in what had just played out but was grateful that she has come up with sleeping powder all those centuries ago. Janet had been fully awake, but not for long with Thalia around. Maybe tomorrow night, she could get them even closer, just like the other two. Glancing over at sleeping officers, she moved their beds closer and grinned as they moved to spoon their bodies together. Yes, tomorrow was going to be interesting.
The next morning, Jack laughed as his team rose from sleep.
*God, where did the truck that hit me go?* Janet thought, raising slowly.
*Coffee. Need coffee. Daniel want happy juice.* the archeologist grumbled mentally.
*Great, he has reverted back to caveman speech. And HE'S the linguist.* Sam rolled her eyes at her friend.
"Morning campers! Coffee is already on and the power bars are waitin' for ya." Jack said cheerfully.
*Someone shut him up!* came three voices, but Jack just grinned wider.
After everyone had had their fill of the life-giving beverage, they pondered what to do next.
"I would like to talk to Thalia and find out her significance in our history a bit more." Daniel piped up.
"Yeah, and I would like to get some more soil samples since we weren't out this far last time." Sam added. Jack nodded at them.
"Ok. Teal'c, you go with Carter for her samples. Daniel, you take Doc with you and be careful around the Goa'uld. Everyone stay in radio contact. I am going to look around the temple." Jack said. Everyone nodded back at him, still sleepy, and finished their breakfast, during which the three telepathic ones grinned at Janet.
*No wonder so many teams get sick, having to eat this stuff every day!* she grumbled, poking the power bar thoughtfully.
Daniel and Janet packed everything away before setting out to find their host- no pun intended- as Sam and Teal'c set out for their samples. Jack reminded them to check in every half hour, then set out to look around the temple. He checked every room that he could access, finding very little of use other than a bathroom-type thing, for which he was very grateful for. After looking for well over half an hour, he came upon a room that seemed to be a type of lab. He moved to one of the large shelves and carefully removed an item from it. He tinkered with it for a few minutes, trying to figure out what exactly was, when suddenly it jerked- coming to life.
"Welcome, Jack O'Neill. How may I help you today?" came a feminine voice from the now glowing machine.
"Um..." was Jack's educated answer.
"I see this is your first time. I am a Mental Dream Maker. I can read your mind and create any simulation you wish to participate in. Shall we start slow? Please relax for a moment." Jack didn't have time to react as his world went black and the machine began to hum loudly. As the world became bright again, he found himself reclining back in a chair beside his pond in Minnesota.
"Wow! Cool!" he exclaimed. He could feel the fishing rod in his hand and the warm breeze against his face. "I could get used to this!" he said and closed his eyes.
"Perhaps we should take it up a notch, shall we?" came the voice again. Jack looked around, but froze when he felt a tug on the fishing pole. He began to reel it in, fighting against the moving weight on the other end. He pulled on the rod furiously, and with a final tug, heard a plop at his feet. Looking down, his mouth fell open in shock. There in front of him, twitching, was the largest crappie that he had ever seen.
"Whoa! That was awesome! I've never caught a fish before!" he cried, looking at the fish that was easily the size of a large shark.
"Congratulations, Jack O'Neill. Now, should we increase?"
"Hell yeah!" he said excitedly, wondering what could possibly be better than all of this.
"Wow, Jack! Great catch." Came a definite female voice from behind him; one that he recognized all too well. Spinning around, he couldn't help but grin like an idiot.
"Sam?"
On the other side of the temple, just outside, Sam was blushing furiously, whilst inside, Janet was wondering just how to get Daniel up off of the floor. He was, by now, rolling around, laughing hysterically.
"Oh my God!" he cried out when he heard Jack greet the dream-Sam. Tears began to roll down his face.
*Shut up, Daniel!* Sam yelled mentally.
*But Sam…!*
*No 'buts'! You will NOT mention this to anyone, ever- do you understand?*
*Awww...Fine. But I am sooo going to tease him about the fish.*
*Oh, don't worry. I will be right along with you there!*
Jack had finally turned the machine off before anything else could happen. He set it back in its place and turned to another contraption. Carefully picking it up, he examined it thoughtfully. Finding a button, he pushed it. The machine hummed for a moment before projecting an image, a very familiar image.
"Hey! It is me! Can you see me? Great! Let's go find some pie! Where is everyone el...?" Jack quickly pressed the button again, practically throwing the machine back onto the shelf like it had burned him.
"Urgo. You have URGO here? How?" he demanded to the ceiling.
*Who did you think created the 'error', Colonel O'Neill?* Thalia asked mentally.
*That was NOT funny!* came three voices, making the Goa'uld grin to herself.
Picking up one more device, Jack pushed the button on top.
*Colonel O'Neill, that is not a wise...* Thalia started, but knew it was too late when the machine began to glow. *Never mind.* she sighed and sat back.
Jack saw the box glow, but it shut off immediately. Shrugging, he set it down and reluctantly left the room, making a mental note of where exactly it was.
*Alright, campers. Meeting in our room, 15 minutes.* Jack thought, knowing Sam and Daniel would hear him.
The team met up on time in the room and Jack surveyed his team, including Frasier.
"Ok. What did we all find?" he asked.
"Well, Teal'c and I did a few tests of the soil, but didn't find anything unusual. No traces of Naquada or Naquadria." Sam said, the turned to Daniel.
"We found that Thalia has been around for centuries, inciting random inspiration throughout history. Did you know that she is responsible for fireworks.? She thought that..."
"Daniel. Anything that helps 'us'?" Jack stopped him.
"Um, no. Not really. But she is trying to help us with stopping the telepathy." The younger man replied.
"Good. Anyone else want to add something?" Jack asked, looking around.
"Well, I do have a question. A rather important question that may be the key to many mysteries of the universe." Daniel piped up, looking seriously at Jack. "Jack...how did it feel to catch your first fish?" he asked, breaking out into a wide, teasing grin.
"You heard that?" Jack cried and Daniel nodded.
"Yep. ALL of it."
"All of...oh...OH! Uh-oh." Jack said, glancing briefly at Sam. "Why you!" Jack moved to strangle Daniel, but the younger man grabbed his arm first. Before anyone could react, Jack was screaming; but not in pain, in...laughter? The longer Daniel held onto his arm, the harder Jack laughed.
"Let go!" Jack cried and Daniel released him. Jack immediately calmed down. "What the hell was that?"
"That, Colonel O'Neill," Thalia said as she appeared before them, "was the Laughing Machine. You picked it up in the lab before I could properly warn you."
"A Laughing Machine?" Daniel asked, poking Jack, who squeaked.
"Stop that!" came Jack's response and he looked at Thalia. "What is a Laughing Machine?"
"A Laughing Machine is a device that, when activated, the person who activated it becomes very ticklish and prone to laughter. It can be stopped at any time by simply turning off the device." Thalia explained, watching as Jack slapped Daniel's shoulder hard. Every couple of seconds, the linguist was reaching over and poking Jack, causing him to squeak in laughter.
*Stop it, or I will tell everyone what and whom you were dreaming about this morniiing.* Jack threatened. It wasn't very intimidating, however, since Daniel poked him again, and he let out a squeak at the end. Daniel just grinned toothily at him.
*Oh, you mean about "bunnies" and bridges made of bananas?*
*Shut up, Daniel.* came Jack and Sam, and he grinned even wider.
"Ok, can we just turn the thing off before I..er..laugh myself to death?" Jack pleaded. Thalia nodded. No one noticed her twitch of the hand though, and she moved back to watch her work. She loved giving people ideas.
"Before we turn the device off, sir, I think it is important to do an experiment," Sam said, sauntering up to Jack, who was eyeing her warily. Before he could respond, Sam grinned evilly and threw her arms around Jack, who screamed in laughter. Daniel grinned at Janet and Teal'c and nodded. The three were soon joining in on the torturous hug. It wasn't long before Jack collapsed, now screaming with laughter and wiggling in a very un-Colonel like way, trying to break free. Just as he was convinced he was going to pass out from lack of oxygen, they stopped. The rest smiled down at him, and stood, letting him recover.
An hour later, the device had been turned off and Jack was back to normal- although Daniel continued to poke him occasionally. Jack glared at him, but Daniel just gave him a deceivingly innocent smile and waited to poke him again.
A/N: Fair warning, guys- there is only one chapter left after this one. I hope you are still enjoying everything, and to those that are leaving reviews- THANK YOU!