Hey everyone. Just a few words before you get into the chapter. First, thank you for all your reviews on the last chapter. I realize I've been taking a ridiculously long time to get back to you. Up until now I've waited until just before I update to reply to you but since it's taking awhile to get chapters out I'm going to try and get back to you sooner, like within a few days of you reviewing. I'll be getting some holidays soon so I'm hoping to be able to get a lot of writing done then. Also, I just wanted to mention that while the past few chapters have been fairly restricted in setting in that they take place mostly in Zack and Cloud's apartment, the plot is going to pick up after this chapter and we'll see the introduction of more characters, old and new. Thanks again for your patience guys and for sticking by me and continuing to read and reveiw. It motivates me big time! ^^
Songs: Our Last Days as Children by Explosions in the Sky, Re: Stacks by Bon Iver, Des Moines by Halloween, Alaska, and Writings on the Wall by Album Leaf.
Chapter IX
I wanna go home to Gongaga. To Gongaga. Gongaga. The words were repeating over and over in Zack's head. Even as Cloud began to describe some of the things he remembered from Gongaga. It took Zack a moment to make himself believe he heard right. And finally, as he let himself hear what Cloud was saying, all the details he was giving about his own hometown, he found his mind filling with questions. How could Cloud think he was from Gongaga? How could he know so many details of the place? Should he stop him? Tell him that he's mistaken, that he's not really from where he thinks he is?
He should have said something. Should have been truthful. But instead, he said nothing. He just couldn't bring himself to do it. For the first time since Cloud woke up from his coma, he was remembering something good. Something comforting. He listened absent-mindedly, nodding softly against the top of Cloud's head just under his chin, all the while he went over and over how this could be happening. He had told Cloud about Gongaga on many occasions while he assumed Cloud was unconscious. So he must have heard those things. But why did he believe they were his own memories?
It hurt Zack to imagine what Cloud would think when he realized what he remembered never happened, not to him anyway. He could imagine how sad it would be when his friend realized he had no hometown. It had been destroyed along with the only member of his family. He almost wished Cloud never did remember.
He felt himself get emotional suddenly as he listened to Cloud describing the house he grew up in. At the mention of the yellow door, he was struck with tears. They slid down his cheek silently, getting absorbed by Cloud's hair. He wished he was at home, with his parents, in that house. But he wasn't.
"Sounds nice, doesn't it?" Cloud questioned then. Zack forced himself to respond, keeping his voice steady so as not to let on what he was feeling.
"Yeah…it sounds great," he agreed. "You should probably try to sleep now, buddy," he suggested then, rubbing Cloud's back a little.
Cloud was quiet a moment, like he wanted to protest. But he gave in with a small sigh. "Yeah," he said at last before shifting himself out of Zack's hold slightly. Zack wiped his cheeks quickly before Cloud could see he'd been crying. Fortunately, the dark of the room masked it somewhat. Cloud turned over onto his other side slowly, facing away from Zack. He took a deep breath before saying something else. "I'm glad you're here, Zack," he said softly. Zack suspected Cloud was meaning something deeper than just being glad to have him in the room.
"Me too," Zack replied softly. He kept his eyes on the back of Cloud's head for what felt like forever. He felt a little relieved when he realized Cloud had finally fallen asleep. He turned onto his back then and placed his hands behind his head. It had been a long day and with the way things were going they were only going to get longer.
000
"The trail is going cold," Cissnei remarked from her place at the table where her colleagues had convened that Sunday morning for one of their discrete meetings. Discrete, meaning secret and completely illegal. No one said anything. They knew she was right. "I thought for sure Zack would have attempted to see Aerith by now," Cissnei added as she studied Tseng's face from where he was sitting at the end of the table. She was well aware of the amount of time their leader was spending with the girl. His rationale was that he was hoping to increase the chance of running into Zack but she suspected it was something else. It almost seemed as though he was trying to spend as much time as possible with her before Zack returned to her. The irony of the situation was that Tseng's presence at the church may have cost them their one chance of catching up with the ex-SOLDIER. That wasn't something Cissnei knew, or any of the others. Only Tseng was aware of that fact. He hadn't been able to shake the feeling that Zack had been at the church that one night weeks ago and had seen he and Aerith on the steps together.
"I say we move on," Reno suggested as he spun around in his chair slowly. "Screw pretty boy and his girlfriend," he included.
"Aerith really has nothing to do with this," Tseng muttered, drawing a brief inquisitive look from Cissnei.
"I wasn't meaning her," Reno clarified. He'd been referring to Cloud. "We don't need 'em," Reno added. Cissnei scoffed and turned to argue but Tseng spoke before she could.
"We do need them, Reno," the dark-haired leader said as he rose from his chair and began a slow pace behind it. "They are our leverage."
"And just what do you think is going to happen if we actually do find them?" Reno inquired sharply. "Fair's going to tell you where to go, that's what."
"Perhaps," Tseng replied simply. "But we have to try to reason at least. For now, we do the jobs we're supposed to be doing, but keep an eye out for any possible signs of Zack or Cloud. There's no reason to believe they've left the city—"
"No reason to believe they're still in it either," Reno countered.
"Are you capable of shutting up?" Cissnei questioned fast.
"Nope," Reno replied with a smug grin.
"The meeting is over," Tseng said then, ending their brief stare down with each other. The small group of Turks filed out but Cissnei stayed behind. Tseng wasn't even aware she was still present until she spoke, bringing him out of his short trance as he was gazing out one of the ceiling to floor windows in the room.
"It must be strange having to keep this all secret from Elena," Cissnei commented as she leaned back against the table and crossed her arms. Tseng glanced at her over his shoulder. "You've been partners a long time."
"Yes, we have."
"Explain to me again why it is that she's not involved in this."
"She can't be trusted," Tseng explained. "She's too devoted to the president. She's far more impartial than we are. She does her job the way she's supposed to."
"There's nothing wrong with questioning the system," Cissnei argued.
"Yes there is. We are paid not to question it. What we are doing is synonymous with treason."
"Treason? A little extreme don't you think?"
"That's what it is."
"Maybe," Cissnei finally agreed reluctantly. "But it's also the right thing to do."
000
Zack looked back at the clock on the wall above the T.V. as he was throwing together a sandwich. Not much of a breakfast food but it was closer to lunch anyway. He'd woken early and could count on one hand the number of hours of sleep he'd gotten. Cloud was still asleep and looked like he could be in that state forever. He was so quiet when he slept. And still. Something that never ceased to freak Zack out a little bit. He almost preferred it when Cloud was sick and trembling or shivering. At least he would know his friend was still breathing. He peered into the bedroom as he was passing with his sandwich, headed for the couch. Cloud was still lying as he was when Zack had woken hours earlier. He was on his stomach, his one arm under the pillow the side of his head was resting on.
Zack exhaled forcefully as he sat down. He glanced up at the clock once more. If Cloud didn't wake up on his own shortly he was going to have to wake him up. He needed his medication. Something he probably should have gotten a few hours earlier but Zack hated the thought of seeing that look of distress peeking out from under his friend's accepting expression when he realized it was time for another set of injections.
Zack waited another half hour before picking himself up from the couch and heading into the bedroom. He flopped down on his side of the bed, making the mattress bounce purposely. He watched Cloud as he sat with his back leaning against the wall behind him. He heard his friend inhale deeply, his back rising slowly. Besides shifting a little, he didn't seem to be showing any intention of rising.
"Spiiike…" Zack murmured softly. Cloud was still. "Spikey," he said a little louder. When Cloud still made no movements, he began to whistle a SOLDIER Academy song. After a few seconds, Cloud stirred, pulling his arm out from under the pillow under him and turning over slowly. Zack let his whistling fade out after a moment. He smiled brightly.
"What was that?" Cloud questioned.
"My, uh, poor attempt at whistling the proper notes to a song?" Zack suggested with a light laugh. Cloud didn't laugh. He was squinting a little as though he were trying to remember something.
"What song?" he asked.
"It's an old SOLDIER song," Zack revealed. "Do you remember hearing it?" he asked hesitantly.
"I dunno…" Cloud said as he appeared to be thinking. "Maybe." He propped himself up on his one elbow. "I still don't remember being in SOLDIER."
You weren't, Zack thought. Another bit of information he hadn't yet divulged to his friend. Now would have been a good time to tell him. He was bound to find out eventually, either by remembering or by some fluke coming across a news article that identified him as a PFC of the army. Yes, he should tell Cloud that he was never a SOLDIER. And that he's not from Gongaga. And that he no longer has parents. And that he never had any friends growing up, except the one, who actually wants to see him but he won't know her anyway so it'll just freak him out. And that the one person he should be able to trust is the one letting him live the lies.
He smiled then before reaching over to the side table for one of the syringes. He was going to have to find someplace to get more syringes soon. He'd been reusing the same ones for awhile now. The medicines themselves were also getting low. "Well you're not missing out on much," he claimed as he was filling the syringe.
"Maybe if you talked about what it was like..." Cloud suggested hesitantly. Zack flinched inwardly. He didn't want to talk about SOLDIER. He didn't even really want to think about it.
"Yeah," he said a little more quietly than he'd been meaning. He cleared his throat. "Yeah, sure." When he became aware that Cloud was looking at him expectantly he added, "Someday soon."
Cloud nodded, though there was a bit of disappointment in his expression.
"Here," Zack said as he reached for Cloud's arm.
"Can I?" Cloud asked, wanting to give himself the injection.
Zack passed the syringe over to his friend, feeling a little unsure if Cloud really did want to do it himself or just didn't want him to. Cloud pulled his one sleeve up on his shirt. Right away they both spotted something around the ports in his skin.
"What's—are you still bleeding?" Zack questioned, reaching out to take Cloud's arm.
"No, it's…dry," Cloud replied, scratching a bit of the blood off his skin. "It's probably from yesterday." He hoped. Zack let go of his arm and sat back against the wall behind him again. He averted his eyes as Cloud proceeded with his injection. As he finished the first one, Zack reached for the next bottle of liquid on the table. "So, how come you didn't get any?" Cloud asked. Zack turned back to him.
"Any…?" Zack inquired, handing the next bottle over to his friend. "Oh," he added as he realized Cloud was referring to the ports. "Uh, I dunno. Guess you were just a little more special," he explained with a tight smile.
Cloud made his second insertion with the needle, wincing against the sting. "You sure it wasn't something to do with me being…inadequate or something?" he asked.
Hearing Cloud use that word, 'inadequate,' conjured up distinct memories of Hojo and his way with insults. He'd certainly used the term on more than one occasion to describe his friend.
"Why would you think that?" he asked back.
"That was the reason wasn't it?" Cloud avoided revealing if he'd actually remembered Hojo's words.
Zack released a breath. "No. That's not it at all, Spike," he assured him. It was true that Hojo may have seen Cloud as inadequate but that's not why he'd had the ports implanted. If his memory served him correctly, and there certainly wasn't much he didn't remember clearly of their captivity. "It's 'cause you were better," he stated. Cloud scoffed and shook his head in clear skepticism. "Hey, I'm not lying," Zack assured him.
"How am I better, Zack?" Cloud asked sharply. "You're stronger, bigger—"
"Taller," Zack jumped in jokingly. Cloud didn't really seem amused.
Sighing, Zack tried to persuade his friend further. "Look, you've managed to do things no one else could. I mean, I know you don't remember it but you took down the 'great' Sephiroth. That was something I couldn't do. I know it's not really a good thing but, you were more important to Hojo and his…goal."
Cloud looked at him. He held a hand out, waiting for the third bottle of liquid. Zack handed it to him slowly. There was silence between them a moment while Cloud filled the syringe. Finally, he responded.
"So. Because I killed Sephiroth?" he inquired.
Zack thought about it. No. It wasn't because he killed Sephiroth. Not only because of that. It was because of Jenova. And the clear influence she had over him. But he couldn't tell Cloud that. He never would. There were a ton of lies he wished he could gather the courage to set straight but this wasn't one of them. He didn't even want the notion or the idea of Jenova in his head. She'd had enough of his time in the lab.
"Yeah," Zack agreed, smiling again. "Yeah, exactly." He got off the bed and stretched. He glanced back at Cloud. "You gonna get your ass out of bed for awhile? Before it's time to get back into it?"
"Yeah, I guess," his friend said as he reached over and placed the syringe down on the night stand. "I'm sorta starving."
"Well I'll make you something," Zack offered. "What do you want?" He headed out to the main room.
"What do we have?" Cloud called after him. He lifted himself off the bed, standing straight for only a brief moment before a rush went to his head and he had to sit back down for a few seconds. He rose a little slower on his second attempt, shrugging off his momentary weakness. He pulled his sleeve down on his one arm and headed out of the room after Zack. His friend was leaning over in front of the open fridge, rummaging for something. Cloud stopped in front of the fridge door and rested his forearms on it. Zack popped back up with something held in his fingers. It looked like a bean.
"Here, try this," Zack said. Cloud took the bean from him and looked at it. "Taste it," Zack urged. Cloud raised an eyebrow.
"Raw?" he questioned.
"Sure. Didn't stop you before!"
Cloud's inquisitive expression stayed in place. "Before?"
"Yeah. You were practically popping them like candy in Nibelheim," Zack divulged as he leaned back against the fridge with crossed arms. Hesitantly, Cloud placed the bean in his mouth and bit down on it. Zack watched his face, partly expecting to see a spark of recognition. There wasn't one. "Well?" he asked.
"It's alright," Cloud replied before reaching into the door of the refrigerator and picking up a jar of applesauce.
Feeling a bit disappointed in Cloud's lack of recognition for one of his favourite foods, Zack moved away from the fridge and started putting together a sandwich for his friend.
Cloud may not have had any flashbacks regarding the bean but he had something of the like while holding the jar of applesauce. It was weird. He didn't see anything. No images in his mind or anything of the sort. He thought suddenly that he could smell pine and campfire smoke. And the sounds. He could hear the crackle of the fire. And Zack's voice. He seemed to be trying to decide on something. Mashed pear?
"Zack," he spoke up, still staring at the jar.
"Hn?" Zack hummed in acknowledgment.
"Did you…give me baby food?" Cloud asked, tearing his eyes off the applesauce to look at Zack. He saw the side of his mouth turn up a little and his eyes shift.
"No…" Zack lied. He glanced at Cloud to see a look of mild disgust.
"Gross," he muttered as he set the applesauce back in the fridge door.
"Hey, there's nothing wrong with it. Some of it's actually pretty good," Zack claimed.
"You tried it?!" Cloud pushed the door closed. "Couldn't help yourself?"
Zack shrugged. "Well, I'll tell you, it was a hell of a lot more convenient than continuing to mash food myself to try getting you to swallow down. And you should know you actually enjoyed some of it. Particularly the peas for some strange reason." He turned and held out a plate with the sandwich on it he'd just put together.
"Thanks," Cloud spoke softly.
"No problem," Zack said in return.
"Not for the sandwich," Cloud countered. "I mean, yeah for the sandwich but for…just—"
"Yeah," Zack said in understanding. He reached out and messed up the front of Cloud's hair. "Like I said, no problem."
000
"Joey!" Tifa called from the front of the bar as she was putting away some glasses. She sighed in annoyance when she received no reply. "JOEY!" she nearly shouted.
"Whaaat," Joey answered finally, as he walked through the doorway from the back room carrying two cases of beer in his arms. Outside of herself, Joey was the only one working at Seventh Heaven. She'd hired him to help her out with washing dishes and keeping tables clean and glasses filled. He was great in that he put up with her and her crappy pay. She wasn't bringing in a ton of profit so she couldn't afford to give him much. He didn't seem to mind. He was a high school dropout and she'd basically taken him off the street and had even forwarded him some money when he first started working so he could afford some place to stay.
"I need you to watch the place while I head out for a bit," she said in slight urgency.
"Head out?" he repeated her words as he set the beer cases on the floor behind the bar. "We're opening in like an hour and a half," he pointed out.
"I know. I doubt I'll be very long. But if I'm not back at eight then you can start without me. I'm sure you can handle the first customers." She highly doubted there would be more than one person in the bar before 9:30. Besides, it was a Sunday night. Not exactly their busy night. She grabbed her sweater from the back room.
"Well, where you going?" Joey asked as she was headed for the door.
"I have to see someone," she answered vaguely. "I'll see you in a bit."
She unlocked the door and headed out. She hadn't planned on waiting so long to leave. In fact, she'd almost convinced herself she wasn't going to leave at all. But at last minute she made the decision to go. To do what she needed to. She was going to see Cloud.
Two sectors over, Tseng was driving himself down to see Aerith. He rarely drove himself anywhere, except when he was heading down to the slums. The fewer people who knew about his ventures down below the plate the better. It had been weeks since he'd seen Aerith. In fact, the last time was the night he swore he'd almost had Zack Fair in his reach. As much as he'd hated to admit it earlier, he and the others did need Zack and Cloud involved in their plans. Problem was, the boys had no reason to want to help the Turks. Tseng still hadn't come up with an incentive. At the moment he was more focused on tracking the boys down. He would worry about convincing them later.
He had never met Aerith at her house, though he knew well where she lived. She'd insisted on more than one occasion, when he'd suggested they meet at her home or a new location, that they should keep their meetings confined to the church. He knew it was her way of compartmentalizing. He was not worthy of having a place in her everyday life. He couldn't blame her. He wasn't sure he deserved a place in her everyday life.
He parked up the street from the church and walked the short distance. He didn't want his car visible. Just in case. In case for some reason Zack Fair decided to show up.
He didn't bother knocking on the large doors of the church. Aerith had told him before to just walk in. He did so now, entering quietly. He spotted Aerith lighting candles near the back. She threw him a small smile in greeting.
"Haven't seen you in awhile," she commented.
"Work's kept me preoccupied," Tseng replied as he approached her.
"That's good."
"It is?" he asked as he watched the soft light of the candles in front of her flickering against her skin.
"Yeah," she said without looking at him. "It's good that you're keeping busy."
He hesitated before saying what was on his mind. "Even if it means I can't visit as often?" he inquired, watching her carefully to see what sort of answer would be visible in her body language. She appeared neutral at first, then her shoulders sagged slightly. She turned toward him, setting down the one candle in her hand before coming toward him.
"You know that I enjoy seeing you, Tseng," she began. "But…"
There was a but.
"But I just think…I think I need some time to myself, you know?" she revealed to his disappointment. "You've been here for me since…well for a long time. You've been a good friend."
She was going to say since Zack 'died.'
How should he reply? He didn't know what to say to that. Yes, there was a professional reason for his visits, but there was a personal one too. He smiled tightly. He lowered his eyes just slightly, noticing something glimmering against the skin of her chest. A pendant hanging from a thin chain.
"I haven't seen that before," he noted aloud. She looked down at the necklace she had on. It was the one she'd found outside the door of the church a few weeks earlier. She was sure it had been left by Zack, though he was gone by the time she found it. "Is it new?" Tseng questioned.
"Uh, yeah," she confirmed. Tseng nodded.
"From your mother?" he inquired next. His question seemed to be hiding some secret suspicion, or at least that's what it felt like to Aerith.
"Yes," she replied as she looked into his dark eyes. "From my mother." She smiled a little to mask her discomfort.
He certainly did have his suspicions. He suspected the necklace was not from her mother, but from none other than Zack Fair. But of course he had no proof. Only his gut instinct. He had a problem now. One perhaps he knew he would have eventually but had hoped to avoid. She could very well know where Zack was and knowing their history and how much she cared for Zack, it was highly unlikely she would ever divulge his whereabouts. She had said they were friends but clearly she didn't trust him. He didn't really trust her either. What kind of friendship was that supposed to be?
"I see," he said softly then. "Well…if you wish to not see me, I shall respect that."
Aerith looked a bit ashamed then. "Sounds terrible when you say it like that. I-I'm sorry—" she began but Tseng help up a hand and stopped her.
"Please. Don't apologize. It's entirely understandable," he said with a slight bow of his head. "You know where to find me, should you need anything at all," he offered. Aerith smiled once more.
"Thank you, Tseng. Thank you for understanding," she spoke gratefully.
Nodding once more, Tseng forced himself to tear his eyes off her and make his way back to the church entrance. As he was heading away from the church he felt a stir of emotions. He had to admit, in the past he'd been jealous of the relationship between Zack and Aerith. Now he felt something different. He hated Zack, if only a little. He found himself in an unfortunate position. The Turks needed Zack alive, while personally he wished that were not true.
000
Zack couldn't help himself. He glanced over at Cloud for about the billionth time in the past hour. His friend had been asleep since around 4:30. There was no keeping him awake and at the moment he was taking up the majority of the couch. He was sleeping, yes, but that wasn't to say he looked peaceful. Far from it. He was sweating and his face donned a slight frown and every few minutes he swore he could feel the vibration in the couch as a tremor ran through his friend. Zack couldn't help but worry. He felt like he was looking at signs of mako-sickness flaring up again. It made no sense though, as Cloud was back on the medications that suppressed the sickness. He should be improving. Not getting worse. He decided to wake Cloud up and get some words out of him. Get him to share a little bit of what he was feeling.
He patted Cloud's one leg and called his name to him a few times before Cloud stirred. He seemed a little confused when he opened his eyes. He looked over at Zack before beginning to pull himself up.
"You okay, buddy?" Zack questioned.
"Yeah," Cloud breathed, nodding. "Just a dream," he added.
"Oh," Zack replied. "Okay, not really what I was meaning."
Cloud looked back at him in confusion. "What?" he asked.
"You don't look so hot," Zack clarified. "Or maybe too hot," he added. "I dunno, you're sweating an awful lot."
Cloud looked down at himself. "Yeah," he agreed. "I am." His breathing was a little quicker than normal.
"Hey, if you're not feeling well, you can tell me," Zack urged. When Cloud said nothing, he made a suggestion. "Maybe you should call in sick to work tomorrow." Cloud looked at him as if that were the worst thing imaginable.
"No, I'm fine," he replied firmly. Really, Zack should have known it was a dumb suggestion. Cloud actually liked working. Or needed to work. Maybe both.
Cloud set his feet on the floor and rested his arms on his knees for a moment before rising.
"Where you going?" Zack questioned.
"Be back in a minute," Cloud replied without looking back at him as he headed for the bathroom.
Nearly fifteen minutes passed and Cloud still hadn't returned. Zack lifted himself off the couch and headed for the bathroom. He was about to knock on the door lightly when he heard a sudden knock at the door to the apartment. He turned to look at the door, his heart beginning to beat faster almost instantly. Who would be knocking on their door? Nervously, he approached it, staring hard at the solid wood, trying to imagine a figure on the other side. Perhaps it was Shell, their landlord. Or maybe the Turks had found them. Would the Turks knock?
His speculations found him standing in front of the door unmoving and unsure of what to do. When another few knocks sounded, he nearly jumped. He made the last steps up to the door and stopped, placing his one hand on the doorknob and the other on the lock.
"Who is it?" he managed to question. There was no reply. He struggled with making a decision on what to do but inevitably unlocked the door and opened it slowly. Standing on the small landing outside the door was Tifa Lockheart. Zack's eyes widened slightly in surprise before narrowing as anger began to set in rapidly.
"Oh, no no no!" Zack exclaimed in his quietest voice possible. He attempted to close the door but Tifa pushed her foot forward fast, keeping it from shutting all the way. "Tifa, no, you can't be here," he said firmly.
"I'm not leaving until I see him," the defiant dark-haired girl stated. Zack glanced back nervously over his shoulder. Cloud must have still been in the bathroom.
Exhaling in obvious annoyance, he stepped toward Tifa onto the landing, pushing her back as he closed the door behind him, leaving it open just a crack as he held onto the doorknob tightly. "How the hell did you find this place?" he asked barely above a whisper.
"Uh, I followed you," Tifa answered pointedly. "I'm not letting you keep me from seeing my friend, Zack," she added matter-of-factly.
"I already told you, he's not ready to see you," he returned harshly.
"Will you stop whispering?" Tifa replied. "Just let me in. So I don't have to kick your ass to get by you."
"Well…that would be pointless because…Cloud's not here," Zack claimed dumbly. He knew it was a lame answer. Didn't stop him from trying it out. Tifa's expression told him it hadn't gotten him anywhere. The muffled sound of a door opening and some coughing was an indication to Zack that Cloud had come out of the bathroom. Tifa was about to say something but he stopped her. "Just! Stay here," he commanded.
"But—" she struggled to get in her words but he extinguished her attempt.
"Just wait!" he urged. "I'm gonna talk to him. Tell him you're here. Just wait out here, alright?" He eased the door open behind him gently. "Just wait," he mouthed once more, making sure she was actually going to do as he requested before re-entering the apartment and closing the door behind him. Cloud looked at him from where he was standing in the kitchen, leaning over the sink. He seemed a little pale and shaky. Tifa fell from Zack's mind as he looked on his friend.
"What's wrong," he questioned as he approached Cloud fast.
Cloud swallowed before answering. "Nothing," he replied at last.
"Spike, it's not nothing, what is it?" Zack pressed on.
Cloud turned his back to the counter. "I just…" He trailed off as he appeared to be thinking. He seemed to mentally shake away whatever he was thinking before saying "I just kinda feel like crap." Zack studied his expression. Cloud shook his head then. "I need some air," he declared as he went for the door. Suddenly, Zack remembered what was on the other side of that door.
"Cloud, wait!" he blurted out, but it was too late, Cloud had opened the door and found himself face to face with Tifa still standing just outside. Tifa's eyes widened slightly in surprise at seeing him. Her expression softened and she smiled.
"Cloud," she breathed out. Both she and Cloud exchanged roaming gazes over one another. "You're really here," Tifa added in mild awe. She laughed a little. "You're different," she said as she took a step toward him. As she did so, he took a step back. The gesture didn't seem to faze her as she continued toward him. He continued to put space between them as she did so. Zack was watching closely, nervously, trying to read what Cloud was feeling. He watched as Tifa raised a hand, presumably to touch the side of his face. Cloud reacted quickly to that, ducking away from her and backing up fast, hitting the side of the couch before rounding it. He looked at Zack then.
"Who is she, Zack?" he asked, his voice filled with apprehension and a hint of fear. Zack opened his mouth to reply but Tifa beat him to it.
"It's Tifa, Cloud, Tifa Lockheart," she said calmly, though something in her voice indicated she was about to become more insistent. Cloud only shook his head, returning his eyes to Zack.
"Zack," he spoke uneasily.
"Cloud," Tifa said as she attempted again to get closer to him.
"Who are you?" Cloud threw back at her, his tone suddenly tinted in subtle anger.
"You really don't remember me?" she asked, taking another few steps toward him. It visibly made Cloud uncomfortable.
"I don't know you. Stay back!" he ordered abruptly, causing her to stop in her tracks. "I don't know you. I don't know you." He repeated those words several times, his voice beginning to waver with emotion.
The look Zack received from Cloud at that moment told him he wanted to be as far away from Tifa as possible. He wasn't going to deny his friend of that. Tifa had had her chance.
"Alright, Tifa, it's time you leave," he stated boldly as he approached her, taking her arm as gently as he could muster at the moment.
"Wait!" Tifa protested as he tried to lead her to the door. "Cloud, you don't have to be scared—"
"You got what you wanted, Tifa, now it's time to go," Zack urged. He pushed her through the door, following her out and pulling her down the stairs with him to ground level.
"Zack! Stop!" she demanded, though he ignored her. She pulled out of his grasp then when they reached the bottom of the stairs. "What the hell is wrong with you?" she asked angrily.
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Zack countered. "Did you think I had no reason for not wanting you to see Cloud right now?"
"I'm sorry, alright? But I had to see him, I'm sorry you can't understand that."
Zack gave her a harsh look.
"You think I don't understand?" he blurted in disbelief. "Believe me, Tifa, I understand. I know what it's like to want to see someone when you can't! To wait years just to see that person! Only to realize—"
Zack stopped himself before he could say anymore. Tifa stared back at him in slight shock. She knew that somehow the topic had shifted away from her and Cloud. Zack shook his head in frustration before heading for the stairs.
"I'm not just gonna give up on him!" Tifa called from behind him. He paused. "That's not what you do when you care about someone," Tifa added.
Zack exhaled slowly. He glanced over his shoulder just slightly befre speaking. "Go home, Tifa," he commanded softly. With that said, he headed back into the apartment.