Chapter Ten

DAVINA

It felt so good to just stand under hot water and let my body breathe in steam. At least I had control now—well, some. She was still there, hiding beneath the surface of my consciousness. A painful lump had formed in the back of my throat and I wanted to cry my eyes out. The absurdity of it all was that I wasn't even sure why.

Was I feeling sorry for myself? Was that it? Or was I just getting over the shock of trauma?

This much I knew: I was an emotional mess and my confusion wasn't helping.

Tears hazed my vision as I gave up the fight and just let them fall, at least they'd blend in with the shower rain. It was difficult to digest everything that happened in the past hour. All I wanted to do was leave this place and return to my mundane existence, even if it meant that I could never have Klaus to myself. My body and mind had been stolen from me and it was all my fault. I knew that I had brought this on myself. I had to prepare for Klaus and Elijah's interrogation. I couldn't let them know that I was the one who had done the spell and brought Tatia back. As wrong as it was to have done what I did, my survival was on the line. If they cast me out of their protection, the covens would kill me. I didn't want to be a dead witch, rotting away in some gloomy crypt.

I was suddenly startled when I heard a knock on the bathroom door.

"Are you all right in there, darling?"

It was Kora.

"Uh, yes! I'll be right out!"

Shit, I must've lost track of time.

How long was I standing in here?

~oOo~

I finished showering and as soon as I stepped out of the bathroom, Kora was waiting for me.

"The Master was worried." She smiled, almost in a guilty way.

"He's no 'master' of mine." I walked past her, feeling bad for making a rude impression.

"Regardless of his wishes, dearie, he will always remain as Master to me."

I rolled my eyes, thankful that my back was to her.

"I took it upon myself to put your things away. Your clothes are in that wardrobe closet, and the remainder of your things are in the chest of drawers over there." She pointed.

I didn't realize that he'd brought a suitcase full of my things. Freya must have packed.

"Master Mikaelson will be expecting you shortly in the library."

"I don't know where that is."

She smiled understandingly and said, "Viktor will be waiting for you down the hall on your left. He will be your guide."

"Viktor?"

"The butler."

Just how many people were staffed in this mansion? In such a short amount of time?

I shouldn't have been complaining. I'd spent nearly a year in some dusty old attic in a rundown church; this place was a fancy hotel in comparison.

After I dried myself, I changed into a knee-length skirt, white top and faded denim jacket before I slipped on a pair of ankle boots. I didn't bother blow-drying or styling my hair, nor did I put any effort with makeup. All I did was tie my wet hair in a messy bun, and presto, I was ready.

~oOo~

Viktor had been exactly where Kora said he'd be—in uniform and all. He wasn't a very tall man—probably mid-50s. A thick mop of greying hair covered his head, twisting in little curls at the end. What stood out the most was his kind blue eyes.

Unlike Kora, he didn't talk much. I followed him down a winding staircase, through hallways left and right (which seemed to take forever), until we reached a set of dark mahogany doors.

"The Master is inside waiting for you." He opened the door and gestured that I step inside.

"Thank you," I said.

Viktor bowed his head before he shut the door, leaving me to face this monstrous room and Elijah by myself.

I'm so not used to this, I thought, wondering if Tatia could hear my stream of consciousness.

I was in pure and utter awe. The library was gorgeous. The walls were covered in shelves full of books, leading to a second level. The ceiling was covered in stained glass, allowing natural light to shine through in a medley of colors. I had entered a wonderland of literature, breathing in the scent of old books and burning wood.

A roaring fire was dancing in the fireplace; I found him sitting in an armchair with a book in his lap and a drink in his hand, right across from it.

He looked up at me and I froze.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better." I rubbed my arm nervously.

"Come." He faintly smiled. "Sit."

I beckoned my legs to move, but they felt like heavy cement blocks. Somehow I managed to make it to the armchair and sit on the plush red cushion.

Elijah sat across from me, staring, studying me—presumably.

"Kora prepared some tea." He gestured to a silver trolley on my right.

"I'm good. Thank you."

I couldn't understand why my heart was racing. It wasn't fear that I was feeling, though I should've been scared. I should've been terrified. He was a monster in human skin.

Elijah parted his lips to speak.

"I would have taken you back home today, but since Tatia is still in there…"

I nodded in understanding. "I get it. It's totally cool."

Was it? Someone else was sharing my mind, influencing my feelings. There was nothing "cool" about it.

"Davina, before we go any further in this conversation, I must ask… were you the one who conjured Tatia's spirit from the dead?"

I had to lie. I had no choice.

"Are you serious?" I frowned, pretending to look hurt by the accusation. "Why would I ever do something like that? I hardly even know you. I never even knew who Tatia was until she shared her memories with me and I put two and two together."

"Forgive my boldness. It was not my intention to offend you. It's just…"

He started to explain what happened during the night of Freya's ritual, after I became possessed.

"The spell," he continued, "it was supposed to direct Tatia's spirit into the body of the person who carried out the resurrection ritual."

When in doubt, deny.

"I don't understand why her spirit entered my body. I had nothing to do with the ritual. I've been staying under your family's protection and I've always been grateful for that. I've never had a hidden agenda against you or anyone in the Mikaelson family—ask Marcelle! He knows me best."

I felt horrible for dragging Marcelle into this. He would've been so disappointed in me if he ever discovered the truth.

Elijah was quiet for a moment, which gave me hope. Maybe I was convincing after all.

Did I feel bad about what I did? Yes, very. If I could've taken it back, I would've. I'd done something stupid and it almost cost me my life—possibly still could've.

"Please believe me, Elijah. I would never do anything to harm you or your family. I see you all as my allies. The only enemies I have are the witches in the French Quarter, not the Original vampires."

This wasn't a lie. The only person I felt threatened by was Elena. She came out of nowhere and took Klaus away from me, right when he and I were getting close.

"I believe you," he finally said, shifting in his seat. "Quite frankly, I tried to analyze everything myself, and nothing added up. You have no motive. I think we have a bigger enemy lurking in the shadows. Someone who is targeting me, not my brother."

"I'll do whatever I can to help, you know that."

Crap. I'd really gotten myself into a mess.

"I appreciate it, but it appears you need help the most right now."

I frowned in confusion.

"Tatia is still in there. Your mind and body belongs to you, not to the ghost of my first love. I know this may be hard for you to believe after everything you saw, but I love her, Davina. As tempting as it is to ask for your help in finding a permanent host for her, I cannot bring myself to do that. She deserves a second chance at happiness, but not this way. It would be extremely selfish of me to bring her into the world of the living just so I could ease my troubled conscience and atone for my sins. I don't deserve redemption."

You do, a voice whispered in my mind.

I hadn't said it.

It was Tatia.

My heart gave a painful squeeze as tears brimmed my eyes.

"Are you all right?" asked Elijah, looking seemingly distraught.

"I'm fine." I laughed, staring up at the ceiling to push back every drop.

"What's wrong?"

I shook my head, silently begging he would change the subject.

But he didn't.

"She heard me, didn't she?" he said, a hint of hope in his voice.

I got up and stood in front of the fireplace. I couldn't look at him. Not when she was making me feel this way.

"Davina, look at me please."

No. I can't.

I could no longer hold my stubborn tears as they poured down my face.

Please go away, Tatia.

I miss him, she whispered.

"Davina." He gently grabbed my arm, and that's all it took. The river had run wild.

I spun around and faced the one vampire I should've fled from.

"I wish I could explain why I'm crying like an idiot out of the blue, but I have no explanation, okay? She's in there inside my head and she's manipulating all my feelings. It's torture, Elijah! I just want it to stop!"

I lied again. The real torture was being inside Tatia's head, witnessing the bloodbaths in his dungeon of horrors. Experiencing her emotions was a piece of cake in comparison. I guess I just hated feeling any compassion toward him. He didn't deserve it. Logically, I knew what he was and what he had done. I should've loathed him. But I didn't, and that was only because of Tatia.

"I'm so sorry." Elijah softened his gaze.

Seeing the kindness in his eyes… it shocked me every time, because I could still remember the cruelty that lived within them; the sick, sadistic pleasure that swirled in those glistening, dark pools. Where was that cruelty now? Did it still exist? Was he hiding it?

I desperately searched for that monster as tears kept rolling down my cheeks uncontrollably.

Where are you? Show yourself.

But I couldn't find him. Either the monster had been killed, or was just asleep.

"I'm truly sorry," he repeated.

"Who are you apologizing to?" I said.

"To you."

My heart shivered when he touched my face and wiped my tears with gentle thumbs; the same hands that had tied her up and flogged her. The same hands that had slapped her in the face and bruised her black and blue.

"I hate you for what you did to her."

His hands fell away from my face as pain poured from his eyes. "I know. I hate myself more. Believe me."

I hugged myself and tried to find some sort of equilibrium.

"I'll make this right," he murmured. "I promise you. I don't deserve her forgiveness or yours, but I'm a man of my word. I will free you from the chains of my past, Davina."