AN: Why the reply button is like the greatest invention ever? You guys get to tell me when something's a little off, point out things that should be explored further. Take for instance this chapter. This chapter has a big old part of Mari in it, who had a thing with the whole adoption thing (okay yes I summed up a much bigger convo into that). Made me realize we needed to see much more of Max and Kendra's convo regarding that aside from Kendra's: "This had to have been in the works for awhile," she continued to look dismayed. You didn't just get a kid overnight. So therefore we are getting more of that in this chapter and I hope it encourages you all to comment on things that you think should be further explored. Though I didn't have them explore this topic as much as Mari and I did in our emails because well as you know Max, she's a quick and to the point girl. No need for dilly dallying unless it has to do with her relationship with Logan. :-P

Thanks for reading guys!

Part Ten

Monday:

"And here we are again," she said on a sigh to the baby in her arms as she listened to click of the door, probably one of the loneliest sounds she'd ever heard as she was sealed into her prison for yet another day.

It amazed her how quickly her home could become that cell. A spacious luxury penthouse…

Maybe that's why Krit wouldn't stop visiting, maybe he got that. Got how similar these red walls could be to those gray…

Still annoyed the crap out of her, but it did touch something within her at the same time.

"Now what should we do today?" her voice held a slight lilt as she spoke to him.

She could do it, she could be the mom she'd always wanted for him. At least that's what she kept telling herself over and over again. Problem was she still didn't want to be a mom. Ever, to anyone. She wanted to turn that part of her off. The part that could care…

Off to everyone, but Logan. She couldn't imagine not wanting to love him. She'd rather a day with him followed by a lifetime of misery than a lifetime of being alone as whacked out as that sounded.

She was guessing if they hadn't figured it out in the twenty years they had Jace how to turn that off than it was pointless of her to wish for it.

"Everyone else falls in love with you," she whispered in a light tone making sure he had no idea what she was saying.

He blinked at her, a sleepy blue.

"They all just fell in love with you," she stroked his cheek and smiled as he turned for it. She wondered how long that reflex lasted. Maybe she hadn't read that book as carefully as she thought she had.

Suddenly it felt as if her arms started to burn and she was nearly ready to start gasping for air as the weight of him became too indistinguishable from her dreams. He was in the bouncer on the coffee table within seconds as he looked up at her looking almost confused as her arms were clenched up towards her and her hands opened and squeezed shut on their own several times before she got control of herself again.

She slunked down to the black couch and shakily inhaled as she pulled her legs up and lowered her head. She had to learn how to get control of herself again!

The dreams had just seemed to wash over her. That flood of love and caring and utter peace, followed by horrific pain before she had even a moment to savor the warmth of the previous emotions. Hearing that cry disappearing down the hallway….

She looked up with watery eyes, not at Will, but clear across the room, staring at the wall above the tv as she started to beat down the emotions that threatened to overwhelm her.

Once calm her eyes returned to Will. She smiled looking at him. "It should be so easy to fall in love with you," she whispered to the sleeping boy. He was cute, she could see that. He'd been cute from the start, skipping the homely stage as if something within him knew he needed every advantage he could muster.

He'd be a heartbreaker as Original Cindy predicted if he continued on this way. The dark hair, blue eyes and olive skin. Probably end up a decent height since…

She took a breath and shook away that thought, not allowing her mind to go there.

A heartbreaker nevertheless especially growing up around Logan. He certainly had the sexiest and most charming personality she ever experienced; of course considering how often he drove her to thoughts of pulling out her hair…Well there was a reason why they called them heartbreakers.

"I'm gonna figure this out," she promised herself and the infant. She had to figure this out.

"Maybe when we actually blow this joint we should check out some of Marianne's classes." Her mind rebelled at the thought of that. All those happy moms and babies… "At least that way you can see what I'm supposed to look like."

Her mind started to mentally go through the flier Marianne had given her. The list of activities that made Max's stomach turn. "Maybe the yoga class?" she offered remembering a separate brochure from Marianne's gym. It like the baby massage was supposed to further or in her case initiate the bond between mother and child. But at least with that there would be something else to focus on besides Will. "Think we both know I could use some inner peace," she said with a shake as she stood having enough of reflection for the day, hell possibly the year.

She paused in the doorway of the office staring at the computer wondering if she should try to find something to make herself useful, but then thought of that thin wisp of a document tucked in along with all of their personal documents, just like hers as false as it could be on official paper.

Name: Cale, William Samuel

Father's Name: Cale, Logan Christopher

Mother's Maiden Name: Guevara, Maxine Anne

She frowned just as she had when she'd read it. She hated seeing things tacked on to her name. How many different names had she seen tacked on to the end of hers? How many different first names had she forced herself to adjust to?

She always seemed to finally be adjusting to them just when Manticore would get on her tail again and it would be new once more.

She'd gotten used to Max Guevara though, just not the rest of the letters she'd put down on her application form for Normal.

Most people had middle names, just like how most people had last names. They were a necessary part of blending in and girls were not named Max, she'd learned that pretty quickly as well.

That document though with its 6lbs and 3oz and 6:17PM…

Made them seem like they'd waited nine months for that day to arrive, that Logan had been by her side as she brought their child into the world. That document was the furthest thing from the truth.

It reminded her of how Kendra just wouldn't let the subject go…

"So did you buy him or what?" Kendra asked after Logan had gone to bed as she fed Will his bottle.

"What?" Max asked looking over confused.

"Give Max the baby 'cuz you've just earned an Original Cindy beat down," Cindy said looking at Kendra while pointing at Max.

"What people don't just get babies overnight," she defended.

"It wasn't overnight," Max stood to go take the baby.

"Yea," Kendra said looking up, "like I'm stupid enough to let him go now. So explain to me Max, very slowly exactly how you got this kid and how I'm just finding out about him now."

"Logan got him," Max said sitting, "I don't know the details I wasn't there. It was in the works for awhile, but we weren't sure if it was going to work out, so it just made sense to keep our mouths shut."

"So you didn't buy him?"

If ever there were a time to admit that Will truly belonged to her, this was it. She let that moment pass. "Like I said I don't know the details," she shrugged.

"Buying a fuckin kid," Original Cindy muttered under her breath as she continued to shake her head.

"It was a good question," Kendra defended once again. "Max," Kendra's voice softened as she leaned in a bit, "don't take this the wrong way, but why the hell did you adopt a kid? You guys haven't even been together a year."

"Plenty of people have a kid within a year. Look at Tina and Corey," she referred to the young couple in her old building who all wished had waited a bit longer, preferably until they moved out of the building or at least that had been the world in the halls every time she visited.

"Yea people fuck up or impulsively decide to have a baby, not go out of their way and adopt."

All questions that needed to be answered Max realized with a calm thought and was annoyed with herself for yet again not having the lie prepared.

"Please that first year counts," Cindy said dismissing Kendra's claims, hoping to either put the girl off or buy Max more time.

"It just seemed kind of stupid to wait," Max said standing as she saw Will had tapered off from the bottle after barely an ounce. Her hands slid around him, Kendra too interested in the response to react.

Max cradled the baby close to her as she took the short walk to grab a diaper to toss over her leg before returning to her chair and lowering the baby down to her lap to burp him. "We almost really blew it last time," she said simply as she looked across at her friend.

Both girls just waited for more as their hearts slightly tore at how close they'd come to actually losing her and the gift it had been for her to return.

"Better too soon than never at all right?" she shrugged. "We just didn't want to fuck it up again."

Kendra launched herself across the small space and slung her arms around the side of Max, carefully not to jostle the baby whose back Max was patting, "You guys could never fuck it up. You're supposed to do the friend thing for awhile. You just caught me off guard a little with him," she said releasing Max from the hug and squatting down to Will's level.

"Gotta tell you something Kendra," she gave a watery smile, "he kinda caught me off guard too." She couldn't lie to Kendra, she couldn't fake day in and day out to her friend, if not for the fact that she was her friend, than the fact that she'd never fall for it.

Kendra pouted as she hopped up a bit and once more wrapped her arms around Max. "You're going to be fine. You're going to be a great mom Max."

She wanted what Kendra said to be true, but somehow she doubted it.

A great mom needed to feel and she couldn't. She kept trying, but it wasn't working.

She was driving Logan insane, her sister wasn't talking to her, her brother was driving her insane and suck in the middle of it all was an innocent little kid who did nothing wrong expect get stuck with her DNA.

-o-

-o-o-o-

-o-

Wednesday:

"Afternoon Maxie," Krit called out coming into the kitchen as she was testing Will's bottle as he was cradled in her other arm as he was crying at the top of his lungs at her for not having his bottle prepared ignoring the fact that he'd decided he was hungry an hour earlier than usual.

"Aww, awww, hey there little guy," he said rushing towards his nephew and quickly scooping him away, "is your Momma being slow? I gotta let you in on something, learn now that it's all females and not just her," he snatched away the bottle Max held out for him.

"Your uncle on the other hand," he said as the baby latched on, "gets the job done quickly."

"Maybe you shouldn't teach him that that's a good thing," Syl replied dryly as she walked into the room effectively canceling out Max's smile over her brother's insanity.

"Don't listen to her," Krit said in hushed tones to the baby.

"Max," Syl nodded towards her.

"Syl," she nodded back.

"Both of you fuckin get over it," Krit rolled his eyes as their brother and not the boyfriend/friend stuck in the middle.

"Over what?" they turned and asked in unison.

He looked down at his nephew, "Second life lesson, avoid females."

-o-o-o-

Bath time would never get old Max thought with a smile as she slid down into the bubbles. Logan kept sending her off to the bathroom every time he couldn't send her off for a ride, it worked, not as effectively, but it worked. So she'd retreated having no desire to play nice with her sister. Bubbles, oil, and salt, the perfect blend for her and Quackers, the yellow duck Logan had bought for randomly one day all while she laughed in the background at the stand.

Yup just her, the bubbles, music and Quackers, with just the occasional sound effect of 'boop' from her as she'd tap him on the head and send him into the water only to come up bobbing.

"This is the life," she said just before she slid under the water as everything else was drowned out.

-o-o-o-

"Oh sorry," Syl said as Max walked out of the bathroom and into her room covered only by her towel.

Max shrugged as she walked past her sister who had been gazing down into the crib.

"Krit was being loud. Didn't want to keep the kid up," she explained.

"He's pretty good except for sudden noises," Max offered in response. "Might want to turn down that blanket and just use the thin one," she said as she pulled upon a drawer, "he'll overheat." She and Cindy had learned that one the hard way.

"Oh," Syl nodded and turned back to do just that. "He's cute," she said offering up as another bridge as her sister dressed.

Max smiled, "OC says he's going to be real popular with the ladies."

Syl looked over for that a bit confused.

"Doesn't get why anyone would want to be with a man," Max explained just as Cindy had explained it to her.

"Ah," she turned back and nodded. "Yea I still can't figure out the draw."

Max shrugged, "Eh I've got no complaints." Once upon a time Logan might have made her consider putting her head or his through one of those paper walls, but that seemed like another lifetime ago.

"Yea you've made that kind of obvious," Syl replied with a sisterly smirk.

"Hey when you've got a good thing," Max replied with a shrug.

She wasn't going to make this easy, Syl thought, regretting how harsh she'd been the first day that had caused this distance between them. "He seems happy, Will that is," she tacked on the end as Max had looked a tad confused and started opening her mouth.

"Oh," Max nodded, that made more sense. Happy and Logan maybe weren't the best words to pair together. Logan and coping maybe? "Doesn't take much to make him that way, fed, burped and clean and he's good to go."

"Yet he has more stuff than me," Syl smiled. Logan's safe house had stuff. She had clothes, her bike, Fluffernut and Krit, whom she'd mistakenly let name their cat. She looked back down at Will, if they ever had kids he was getting no say in them whatsoever.

"He's got more than half of Seattle," Max replied dryly.

"I think Krit wants one," Syl suddenly offered up hoping to draw her sister out.

Max looked a little stunned by that, then thought about how eagerly her brother leapt at everything baby related. "And what about you?" she asked leaning up against the dresser.

"We don't have the life for a kid," she shook her head, "we'll probably never have the life for a kid." She looked back down at Will and wondered if she'd ever have that. Have all of this. The home with their things, their permanent things. One home for years upon years. A place to raise kids to live one of those normal lives.

"Not like anyone does nowadays," no one she knew with a kid had a kid knowing they could always take care of it. They'd just hoped love might actually be enough. Sometimes it was.

Syl continued to look unconvinced as she looked down at Will searching out what little bits belonged to which sibling. It was a little hard to do on someone as young as him. She just kept seeing her sister, her very hurt sister in him.

"Worse things than Krit procreating, like Sketchy."

Syl smiled, "He's not that bad."

"Sketch or Krit?" Max asked with a smile.

"Sketch," Syl turned and smiled as she shook her head, "Krit should probably never be allowed to ever have offspring. Nutters proves that," their cat was a maniac thanks to Krit who thought it was fun to teach him to pounce on anything that moved including her feet.

"He take his whole bottle?" Max asked not really sure where she was supposed to take this conversation as their conversation dropped off.

"There was a little left," she frowned, "actually probably less than that since I think half of it ended up down Krit's shirt. Speaking of which Krit borrowed one of Logan's."

Syl laughed when she caught sight of Max's scrunched up face, "Found something that's tight on Logan so he doesn't look like a kid wearing his parents clothing."

Max's hand rose up and covered her mouth as a short burst of laughter emerged as she imagined just that.

"Damn," she said as she started towards the crib as Syl turned to the suddenly crying baby, "like I said sudden noise."

-o-

-o-o-o-

-o-

Monday:

She was guessing that ball she'd wished for back in Manticore wouldn't have entertained her as much as she thought it would have. TV with every station you could get in Seattle. Computer with not only access to the internet, which continued to boom although the majority no longer owned them, but pointless computer games meant to pass the hours. Books: novels, short stories, plays poetry. Treadmill, elliptical and weights. Fully stocked fridge. A bathroom that would make most of Seattle weep with envy. And the only thing that held any interest to her was the bottle of Jack kept in the cabinet. She was debating just pulling it and a glass down and tossing the onesie on the kid that said, 'My Momma drinks because I cry' in case Logan came home while she was passed out.

Of course she wouldn't.

Hmmm maybe the better statement would be: she hadn't yet.

But oh she was getting there.

She groaned and hopped off the stool she'd been sitting on for a whopping ten minutes reading one of the magazines out of the stack Logan had bought for her. Magazines along with some comic books, mad libs, crossword puzzles, Su Doku…

He asked about maybe a paint by numbers or one of those teaching videos, offered to pick up a guitar, the knitting he'd suggested, she'd threatened to stab him in the eye with a needle if he ever even thought about it again.

He was cute and considerate, but damn she was bored and not bored for human contact, at least none but his because EVERYONE kept visiting. She just wanted out.

Maybe calling Marianne wasn't such a bad idea though.

Hey baby poop had to be more interesting than who was wearing what in LA, well those who could afford to wear anything aside from threadbare hand-me-downs.

Kendra had somehow managed to land a short term gig as a translator for a local law firm who was in negations for something with a Japanese client, but had stopped by once after work last week and once again during the weekend. Original Cindy and Krit had both come over a handful of times, Syl that once and Marianne had made a quick stop by on Friday to try to entice Max into coming to a baby massage class. Max had actually wished she'd been able to say yes.

But she kept smiling, and laughing, and joking and acting as if she wouldn't step in from of her clone again if given the opportunity.

She paced into the living room and spied the phone on the coffee table.

She could call Prescott start crying and he'd demand Logan go home and stay home until she felt better.

She wouldn't though.

Not yet.

She checked on Will who was happily dozing in his basinet. Gave a little flick to a pastel star hanging above him as she looked at him and wished she could sleep half as much as the kid, that would certainly help pass the time.

Sam had come by on Sunday and checked him out as best as Sam could as he continued to search for a doctor he deemed trustworthy of knowing their secret.

Sam had said just what the books had been telling them so far Will was perfectly normal. He was starting to follow things with his eyes which was a little advanced for his age but not uncommon.

He couldn't have chosen less sleep to be his little uncommon quirk? Could he?

She frowned and walked away. Picked up the book she'd tossed on the table awhile ago. The Di Vinci Code, not that interesting since she'd watched the movie a few years ago. She groaned as she fell back on the sofa and smothered a pillow over her face as she let out a louder one. Her hand reached out and grabbed the remote before she even remerged and she rolled over as it flipped on.

She stayed like that for a half hour refusing to give in to the urge to move. She was going to fall into the Peterson's soon if she paced anymore and she somehow doubted their downstairs neighbors would simply say hello as she landed on their cat.

The door opened. Shit, was the only thought that ran through her head and she shot up as she flipped off the tv and caught her reflection in it, seeing what she already knew was there. Her hair a tangled mess, spit up on the corner of her shirt, along with a splash of coffee at the bottom, hell she hadn't even brushed her teeth after eating that entire container of garlic humus as her lunch.

While she might have nothing to do she was sick to death of changing and fixing herself up since she was only seeing the person who kept doing these things to her.

She knew it was Logan easily from the sound of the exo as he made his way towards the living room.

In Logan's defense he didn't flinch at the sight of her, just smiled as brightly as he always did.

"Hey," she said walking and not running over like she wanted to, "I wasn't expecting you home."

"I can tell," he smiled.

She lifted up and pecked his lips.

His hand came around and held her up as he sniffed, "You start eating whole cloves of garlic?" Once more in his defense he gave her another quick kiss since he still had her thre.

She laughed and lowered down, "Not my fault you're the one who does the food shopping."

"Speaking of which," he smiled, "I brought you a surprise. Stay put," he smiled.

She pouted as he walked away.

"What the hell is that?" she asked a moment later, hearing what sounded like her bike being pushed and started walking towards him.

A stroller.

Another stroller.

One of those jogging ones in various grays and black with just a touch of orange piping.

Why the hell did they need another stroller? She thought still frowning at it, they couldn't even use the one they had.

He was smiling brightly by the time she finally got it and looked up.

He just barely managed to stay upright as she launched himself at him.

Just barely managed not to bust his ass sometime later as she pushed him into the guest room.

"I thought you were desperate to get out of here," his voice was breathy as he was pushed back on the bed.

"It can wait a few," she said with one of the first truly honest and happy smiles he'd seen in awhile.