WATCHTOWER

OCTOBER 25, 2016, 0847 PMT

Tigress

The time here has been passing by leisurely for the time being in the Watchtower, comparable to watching Earth slowly rotate from above. It's not easy being back up here so soon, especially when members from the Team and League walk around and stare at you as if you're some complete stranger. The looks were annoying, but I don't care. I take pride in what I did, so their thoughts about me don't matter. It has been months since I was last in the Watchtower, easily recalling myself on the day I entered the systems database without authorization. I never expected myself to be back here anytime soon or if at all, to conclude I wasn't here for the simple matter of my own choice and here for one reason. The original seven members of the Justice League, with the addition of Kaldur and Nightwing, await inside the conference room discussing my future with the Team, if I still have one. Because of how much time it's taking to decide my final conclusion, I speculate the decision is a hard-fought tough one, but with fair judgment. With my recent behavior, trust issues, and the loss of loyalty to the League and the Team, I figure me being booted would be a simple give and go. Then there was a discernible change in the complete opposite of my recent self; a part of me that was known to be non-existent for people I who know me, a different side of myself in which I didn't know about. There has to be some consideration for my reasons to why I did what I did to bring Wally back. Even if their final the decision is pessimistic, I'd leave on a good note knowing someone in there is on my side to understand my reasoning.

Unlike everyone inside the conference room, my future with the Team is second in place to mind. Sure it'd be nice to know the answer so I can close the door and stop my bothersome nerves from going demented throughout my body from the little anxiety I feel, but my thoughts continue to spiral on Wally. It's almost been a full week since I last saw him when he left me to live with his parents back at Central City. There was a time where I hoped he'd come back after a sudden change mind, but I've been left with nothing. There were times throughout the days where I'd expect a letter from him, maybe a phone call, or unexpected text...but then again, what was I thinking. He made his choice and though it's hard accepting him never coming back, I've officially closed that chapter of him in my life. When I think of what I've been through for the past couple months, my mind goes into a dark place. A place I tend to lock with a mental object of a key where I store all of the memories, the good and the painful ones, I've endured throughout my lifetime and lock them away in the back of my mind. With his death making the top of the list and his memory never unfolding, striking me to the heart and seemingly like hitting my soul, it was easy access to have everything spill. I can never unleash the darker side of myself again. I'm not my dad, I'm not what my mother used to be, and I'm not Jade. It's not who I am.

Nightwing and I once had a conversation a week after Wally's death. In order to help me cope and try relating my situation with one of his own, he brought up his similar experience about once losing Robin II. He never mentioned anything about Batman having to cope and grief while dealing with the loss of his protege at the time, but knowing that Robin II was one in the family and losing him to, if not, the most notorious villains of all time was hard to handle. He brought up a small story about the Joker's past and if I can remember his exact words, '...Anyone can go mad after one bad day.'. Like Nightwing always is for his companions, he was trying to be there for me. He's been a hero longer than any of us on the Team, so he's witnessed changes in those he knew during the span that have lost their loved ones. He installed those words in my head so I wouldn't do the same. But I let myself slip. Like walking up a rocky hill, I skipped a step and stumbled in my own wrong doings. That mindset has to stay in my head for as I keep my career going.

So even when Wally died and I brought him back, I couldn't completely bring him back and I cant change what's already done. Sometimes I find questioning myself is everything I did really worth the trouble I'm in now that he's departed? I don't think this as a negative thought full of regret, but it's something I wonder constantly. All I can do now is make my future better for me and regardless of the decision the League and Team makes for me, I'll choose my own path from this point. My time to leave the 'Artemis life' behind altogether is now. I thought I did this months ago, but I went against my word and ended up leaving myself thwarted. I just never realized how much a death of a loved one can put an affect through most people until you actually experience it yourself. As a hero, I always have that of having the ability of saving everyone, no matter the situation they're in. But I didn't save Wally. I wasn't damn near close.

My selfish and guilty thoughts are pushed aside when I notice a black shadow of figure presenting itself while approaching me from my left side. I keep my head leveled facing the ground. Whomever it was, he or she doesn't interest me enough to take a glance of who it is. I keep my arms crossed over my chest, leaning my back against the wall next to the automatic sliding door giving the entrance to the conference room.

"They've been in there a long time." A teenage voice says from aside. Once he spoke I knew it's Kid Flash and I don't take the need on acknowledging him. "You seem neutral. Are you nervous?" I shrug my shoulders in response after giving him a quick glimpse of the worry I lack to visibly show in my eyes. "You aren't worried at all? Not afraid like a little bit?"

I take another quick glimpse at him, finally able to block the full remembrance of Wally in my head since Bart has taken over his mantle. I didn't have to confuse him with Wally anymore though he resembles him almost exactly the same with his costume on. To answer his question, honestly, I'm not. I've already prepared myself for whatever their decision would be. "It is what it is. I can't change whatever decision they make."

He looks over his shoulder as if he were checking to make sure nobody is close nearby. "If I were in there with them, I'd give you my vote. I know I said this before, but what you did...I think it was pretty amazing. All the sacrifice, the hard work, the dedication you put through...I don't think anybody here in the Watchtower has the guts to do everything you did. Even though he doesn't remember anything, thanks for bringing him back."

He places his right hand on my left shoulder in the end in display of comfort. I smile in return from his appreciation. If there were more people who'd be thankful like him, I'd feel a lot less dingy. I don't get the chance to welcome him due to our attention being caught short from the door sliding open next to me, presenting the Flash.

"We're ready for you Artemis." He welcomes me, his face full of seriousness and his voice as plain as the plainest it can be.

I look back to Kid Flash with a slight grin on my face, though at heart I'm a little anxious to know about my future. "Wish me luck?"

"You don't need it." He responds quickly, throwing his smirk back at me.

I follow the Flash from behind to enter the usually secluded conference room. Inside my eyes first set on the famous o' mighty table everyone mentions at one point during duty. At least it presence itself in such a way with the other six founding members of the Justice League sitting in a three sixty degree circle, otherwise it'd just be a normal table. Once the Flash steps aside for me to get a better all around view, everyone's heads turn to face me. I never had all of this attention put on me in one sitting and the atmosphere almost feels hostile. This escalates my nerves a smidgen. Nightwing and Kaldur stand to my far right, next to each other without the slightest expression on their faces. It's impossible to even guess what the outcome is. It's almost comparable to the feeling of being held at a parent teacher conference meeting, except the teachers aren't wearing costumes. The door behind us closes unexpectedly, giving me another dosage of nervousness and shivers throughout my body. I do my best to not present myself rattled. Superman rises from his seat with his arms leading behind his back.

"Welcome Artemis." He greets me strongly after breaking the silence. I didn't know how to present myself to a serious and situational meeting about me, so I neither wave or return his 'hello', only staring at them all. He continues, "Let's cut to the chase and begin with saying it's obvious we all know why you're here. You've taken it upon yourself conducting on several activities in the past that have caught up with you and you've been held responsible for your actions that have resulted with severe consequences."

Batman rises from his seat next, standing next to the Man of Steel. "We as a whole have discussed on your future with the Team. Judging from your recent actions we've taken a vote, excluding the Flash for being a unit in the family, but this includes Nightwing and Kaldur."

"I have something to say before you announce your decision." I interrupt them, removing my Tigress mask completely from hiding my face. "I don't regret anything I did in the past. I know what I did was wrong and I know I've lost my trust and disloyalty towards all of you, but what I did needed to be done regardless for my sake, his, or anyone else that cares about Wally. I would think you guys would be grateful for bringing a lost comrade back, one of our own, but this isn't the case. You're focusing on the bad instead of the good." I set my sights to the Green Lantern. "I never used my knowledge against you. It was never my goal to put myself in a position as it were to seem like I were to betray you. I was a single patriot and carried the mission out like one. To get Guy Gardner in trouble was not my intention either, but he agreed to help me after I asked for his assistance." I pause for a moment to return my frustrating sight back to Superman and Batman. I can feel the grip tightening on my mask. "I didn't go on with my mission the right way because I knew you would reject my idea, so I went along with it on my own. Before I came inside while I was waiting out there, I was thinking about what would be the most likely result for my future on the Team after you'd make your decision. I realized that you guys can't tell me my future. I'm the only one who can shape my life and make my own future. From here on out, I'm quitting the Team effective immediately. You don't have to worry about me making anymore mistakes like this again."

The room stays quiet, even the sound of my heartbeat can't be heard from my own ears. Neither one member from the League is surprised or foiled from my decision, maybe a sharp head turn from the Martian Manhunter, but otherwise their mouths are shut. Batman glares at me subsequently with Superman glancing at a baffled Wonder Woman. I look over to Nightwing, though his jaw had dropped just barely and Kaldur lower his head towards the ground, the two seem balked by my decision. I meet eyes back with Batman, still his glare quite focused on me for the long run. We turn into what looks like stare off for what goes on for seconds, which appear to be almost like hours, until he breaks the contest by blinking first. Though the sense of freedom and security sets in, I give no sign disrespect by leaving with a smile. Right then and there I turn away, heading for the door.

"Wait." A voice says from behind. I turn around to the Flash catching up to me from my backside. He too looks to be despondent by my decision, but it's set and done. There's nothing that can change my mind now. He places his hands on top of my shoulders and pulls me into an unexpected, but warm and gentle hug, the feeling strong enough to express his thanks and gratitude.

"Thank you."

I too return the hug also, wrapping my arms around his body for a brief moment, then letting go to make my way outside on my way to the Zeta-Tube. I turn my attention to Nightwing and Kaldur once more, giving them a farewell nod before I'd fully exit the conference room. It's a good feeling knowing I was able to get the last word in against the rest off the higher-ups. Once the door opens and my exit is set, I leave nothing behind but my confidence.

Wherever Wally's mind is, I'm sure he'd want me to move on with my life and be happy. My one mistake is that it took me a while to get the clear picture. The mind bugging part about the entire ordeal is how my one hopeful plan didn't go one hundred percent the way it was coursed. But he's alive now and it's great to know something good came out of the entire process, even if Wally isn't himself anymore. In either case and for the better of my future, it's about time I finally looked forward to pursue my forthcoming goals that I set aside a while back. Letting go of the past is what's best and leaving it behind is difficult, but the memories I share will always be remembered. As long as I live, Wally will always have a big piece of my heart.