Sorry for not updating in a few days- work has been crazy!

Chapter 10

C.C. went on with her wedding day morning, despite the fact that she had gone to Niles room to reconcile and found it empty. She had never expected him to NOT show to her wedding.

There were many things to think about that day and she soon found herself occupied with flower delivery, dress delivery, and getting to the salon to have her hair done. She decided on a simple french twist with a white tigerlilly in the crease. She couldn't help but think about Niles as she prepared herself for the big day. What was he doing? What was he thinking? What bothered her most was not knowing whether she'd see him before her move to England.

"I don't think I can live without seeing him one last time. He is my best friend for crying out loud, why did he desert me on one of the biggest days of my life?"

C.C. knew the real reason, Niles was in love. Hell, maybe she was even in love with him, but she knew that relationship would never last. He'd be the butler and she'd be the rich socialite. What would her colleagues and friends say when he accompanied her to dinners and she had to introduce him as her partner, or husband? The repercussions seemed to weigh heavily on her shoulders as she dragged herself into mental despair. She wouldn't see him except on the few visits she made home to see her family and the Sheffields. Now that they had had their fight they might not see each other at all, or talk. He wouldn't bring her donuts and coffee to work early in the morning ever again. She wouldn't find comfort in his very blue eyes. She would have dark haired, brown eyed children instead of blonde haired, blued eyed children- Wait, was she even going there? No.

"No. I don't want Niles' children, I want Chandler's! I'm marrying Chandler because I love him more than anyone in the world!"

Except Niles.

"No, MORE than Niles."

Except you're lying to yourself, C.C.

Two sides of her brain fought, and she felt the prick of a migraine starting in her left temporal lobe. She was knocked out of her thoughts by the hairdresser, "How do you like it?"

"Like what?"

The woman raised her eyebrows, "Your hair?"

C.C. turned to look at herself in the mirror, "Oh yes, its lovely. Thank you."

Her makeup was done, and she soon found her sister and cousin pulling her into her wedding dress, OOHing and AHHing as the zipper was pulled up and shoes were slipped on. Her Grandmamma came into the dressing room of the church with a box. She sat down and called C.C. over to her to speak with her alone.

"You know C.C., I've always had a special place in my heart for you. I wanted to give you these things before your wedding as a gift- I want you to have them before I am gone."

C.C. felt emotions rushing to her eyes, "Oh grandmamma, you really don't have to give me anything.."

"I know, but here they are. Something old.." She handed C.C. a beautiful silver mirror that was handmade and had the initials CCB on them. "This was given to me by your grandaddy- at one point it was your great grandmamma Chastity's. On our wedding day, he swore he would love me and tell me how beautiful I was everyday- but the mirror was there if I had any doubt otherwise."

C.C. gasped, "It has my initials on it!"

"Well, not for long! What is this Chandler chaps last name? Evans?"

C.C. smiled sadly, "Yes."

"Hm. Too bad his last name doesn't begin with a B!" Grandmamma reached into the box again, "Something new, I got these pearls for you to wear, I figured you can't go wrong with pearls on a wedding day." She slipped the pearls around her neck and C.C.'s hand came up instinctively to lightly touch them as she stared at herself in the mirror. "Something borrowed.. I decided on one of my embroidered hankies- every bride needs one you know." C.C. folded it and tucked it in the top of her dress, "And I had the hardest time trying to figure out what to give you that was blue, but then I realized I already gave them to you years ago.."

C.C. looked questioningly at her grandmother, 'What is that?"

Grandmamma leaned in with the Babcock smirk on her face, "Your eyes, doll!"

C.C. hadn't expected to lose it, but right when her grandmother left the room her eyes burst into tears and she felt like running. It didn't feel right. None of it. Her grandmamma and grandaddy Babcock had lead a life of love that she knew she couldn't live up to.

Niles had left that night shortly after leaving C.C.'s bedroom door. He couldn't stand next to her as she married Chandler. He loved her, and try as he might to distract himself with wedding plans, nothing would spare the heartbreak he felt. When he left the mansion, he decided to go stay at a close hotel until he could decide what to do.

The night was filled with tossing, turning, restless sleep. He woke up the next morning hugging his pillow. He had terrible dreams of chasing C.C., the train of her wedding dress just out of reach as she ran. Just toward the end of the dream however, he stopped running and she turned around thirty feet ahead. He saw something in her eyes that spoke louder truths than she would really admit.

"She does love me, I know it." He walked down Fifth Avenue, watching people pass by- some in a hurry, some strolling with their partners, some were obviously tourists by the way they stared in awe at the buildings and statues around them. He came to the entrance of Central Park, and with nothing else to do he entered.

C.C. ran down the steps of the church fully dressed in her wedding gown toward the park ahead. Life sucked. Everything SUCKED! Her life had always been one big joke- Niles was right.

Even on what should have been the happiest day of her life she was running. She walked a ways until she came to a bridge and stared out, feeling absolutely hopeless. In one hour, guests would be arriving, expecting to see a lovely, happy bride make vows to the tall, dark, handsome man at the alter.

Back at the church, Chandler arrived in tux, nervously wringing out his hands. C.C. had not called him that morning and it was very odd. He hadn't called her, not wanting to disturb whatever women did to get ready for their wedding, "D.D., have you seen C.C.?"

D.D. looked very distraught, "Well, I think she is just a little on edge about everything going on. Its a lot for her to take in you know, the wedding, the move to another continent," D.D. whispered under her breath to herself, "Sleeping with one man for the rest of her life.."

"D.D., WHERE is she?"

She moved her weight from one foot to the other, "Well, she sort of ran outside to the park- don't worry! I think she just needed some air.."

Chandler walked out of the church and toward the park. He followed the main path until he came to the small pond and saw her leaning over the bridge. Her eyes were downcast and her hands were folded, she was obviously wrapped up in her thoughts because when he walked up to stand beside her she hardly even noticed.

"Hello, C.C."

She was startled and turned to look at him, "Oh, Chandler. I didn't expect you to see me before the wedding. Nanny Fine says its bad luck to see the bride.."

"Well you're obviously shaken up, or upset?"

C.C. sighed, "I'm just shaken up a bit, its all a lot to handle, you know? I mean, I am so happy to be marrying you, I just needed some time to think."

Chandler couldn't help but notice the hesitation and sadness in her voice when she told him she was happy to be marrying him. Deep down, he had felt all along that her heart didn't really belong to him. He had hoped that his love for her would be enough for the both of them. At this point, though, on their wedding day, he realized he was being unfair to her- she wouldn't TRULY be happy with him. When he had first met Niles, he knew there was no way that there could ever be anything between them, but in the last month he had seen something light up in both of their eyes as they looked at each other, spoke with each other, or even spoke OF each other. When he had to take the phone call at the rehearsal, he had come back into the sanctuary and paused. There was Niles and C.C. standing at the alter, hands in hands, looking at each other like they were the only two people in the room.

"C.C., don't you think its time to be honest with yourself?"

C.C. looked at him with furrowed eyebrows, "What are you talking about, Chandler?"

He smiled softly, "You know, I came back into the rehearsal last night after the phone call from Charles and saw the way you looked at each other."

C.C.'s defenses went up, "Chandler, you have no idea what you're talking about, I have absolutely NO feelings for Niles.."

Chandler raised one brow, "Oh yeah? And how do you know I meant Niles? I could've been talking about anyone there.."

C.C. gave up. Putting her face in her hands she let go of the air that was stuck in her lungs.

"C.C., its okay. I love you, but I want you to be happy. Its not enough for one person to love, it has to be coming from both people or else its a disaster from the start. I see the way you look at each other, the way you interact. I know he is a butler, but for Gods sake, its the 90s!"

C.C. rolled her eyes, "My family doesn't care what decade it is. What they care about is money, status and control."

"Screw them, C.C. I thought you were stronger than that. You've made a way for yourself. Start learning to stand up for what makes YOU happy. God, I can't believe I'm trying to talk my fiancee out of marrying me, how pathetic is that."

C.C. laughed for the first time that day.

"Go find him, C.C."

ahh things are finally looking up! Comment, review! Thanks!