A/N: Lookie what I have here! It's the new chapter! Hooray! Now we're getting really into it. As always, I love reviews! They make me update faster.

Disclaimer: Me'sa no Stephenie Meyer, me'sa Jar-Jar-Binks!

Err... Well, not really. I'm not a bestselling author, nor am I a computer generated character, who lives on Naboo.

BPOV

"Bella?"

It was Jacob.

"Bella!" Jacob hurled himself at me, instantly enveloping me in what would have been a bone crushing hug, had I not had skin of stone. He was so astonished and hysterical with joy, he didn't notice how unusually cool my skin was, or how abnormally quickly I had been running.

"Bella, you're alive!" His giant, warm body began to shake, and I heard the unmistakable sounds of crying coming from him. Jacob sunk to his knees, pulling me down with him, and cradled me in his arms. I felt his hand stroke my hair, and I reached my hand around the back of his neck, pulling myself even closer to him. We just sat there on our knees; sat there and clutched each other. Jacob began to rock me; forward and back, forward and back, as if I were a sleeping baby. "You're alive Bella. You're alive." he sighed, over and over.

"We were so worried!" Jacob gasped, finally breaking out of his trance. "We thought Victoria had gotten you! When you disappeared, and no one could find any trace, we-"

"Jake!" I interrupted him, my heart breaking at the news I had to tell him. Why, why, why did this happen? We would have been so perfect for each other. Our future would have been beautiful. It would have been perfect. That happy future had been ripped from my clutches. I could barely bring myself to say the words that would bring Jake's happy moment to a violent end, so I spoke in barely a whisper. "Jake, Victoria did get me."

"What?" Jake asked, confused by what I had said.

"Victoria. She did catch me." I sighed, my heart sinking into the pit of my stomach.

"But you're still alive! Did she let you go!? I mean, you couldn't have escaped!" He said, shocked, as he untangled our limbs. He sprung to his feet, pulling me up with him. He held me at arm's length, so he could look me in the eye. I looked up at him pitifully, staring into the depths of his wide brown eyes. Suddenly, they widened in realization; he had finally seen that my eyes were blood red. The color of a vampire's eyes. The color of a killer.

"No." He whispered under his breath, his enormous frame beginning to crumple. He stepped back in shock, his face twisting with sorrow. The pain in his eyes…. It was unbearable. It punched a hole straight through my heart. The pain I felt when Edward left? I would take that a hundred times, over this agony. At least then it had only been me who was suffering, and I was not the one who was causing others pain. Jacob staggered back several steps, tripping over his own, oversized feet.

I'm sorry Jake! I'm so, so sorry. I screamed internally. Why couldn't I get myself to say it out loud!?

"Jake… I-"

"NO! No, no, no, no, no!" Jacob screamed turning and punching a tree in half with anger. He took a few rasping breaths, desperately trying to regain control of his rampant emotions, and failing miserably.

"Victoria didn't! She can't have! Please, tell me I'm wrong! Tell me anything! Anything other than what I think."

"Jake-" My perfect voice cracked, the familiar stinging sensation behind my eyes, returning. "I wish I could, but I can't. It's exactly what you think." Jake sunk to the ground, and buried his face in his hands. I could hear his every breath; each one slow, and purposeful. He was trying to keep himself from crying again. He sat like a statue, his eyes glazed over, staring off into the distance.

"Jake…" I whispered, trying to get him to look at me. "Jake, are you ok?"

Oh, Jake! What have I done? He looks freaking comatose!

"Jake, I'm so sorry!" I sobbed, desperate to get anything out of him. He hated me. I knew he would, and I should have been more prepared for the staggeringly painful sting of rejection.

You knew this would happen, idiot. I shouldn't have come back. I can't expect Jake to completely alter his view on vampires, just because I've become one. I need to leave. This was a horrible idea. I need to run; run and never, ever look back. Run forever. Everything will be ok, as long as I keep running.

"Sorry?!" He spat back at me, looking up. "What do you have to be sorry about!? You didn't choose this, and it sure as hell isn't your fault! This is my fault! I should have told Embry to run patrol alone! I should have stayed with you. I'm the one at fault here. What happened to you; what you suffered because of me…" He shuddered, covering his face with his hands again.

"So, you're not mad at me?" I gasped. I had been terrified that he would despise me! He turned, looking at me like I was insane.

"MAD at you?! I'm not mad at you!" He scoffed. "I'm just so happy you're alive! Or…. Well, you know what I mean. I am FURIOUS at that redheaded bitch. She will not be around much longer, if I have anything to say about it."

"Oh, Jake!" I yelled, throwing myself at him. I couldn't contain my joy any longer, and I tackled him to the ground; hugging him in an Emmett worthy fashion.

"Whoa!" He yelled, surprised by my violent hug. He landed flat on his back, and I curled into his side, just taking comfort in his presence. He slowly realized I wasn't going to do anything else to him, and Jake put his hand on my back, gently tracing the length of my spine with his hands. We lay there, listening to the sounds of the forest, and staring up at the night sky.

Yeah Bella… Enjoy it while you can. A little voice in the back of my head whispered. Sooner or later he'll get used to the idea of you being alive, and then he'll remember that you are his natural enemy. You are not meant to be together. If you had, you wouldn't be the monster you are now.

Shut up! I yelled at it weakly. Jake still loves me! We can be happy! He's immortal too, you know.

Yeah, but he's still part human. What happens when you get too thirsty? What if you take a note out of Jaspers book, and make a leap at Jake? How would you live with yourself?

I wouldn't… Besides, he smells awful! Not like food at all.

What if you weren't careful, and hurt him? He may be strong, but what if you hurt him?

I won't hurt him! I can't.

Oh, but you could, and you would. Are you going to force Jacob to be 17 forever? Would you make him repeat high school with you for eternity?

No! I cried, horrified at how seductively correct the voice sounded. He wouldn't have to repeat high school. We could go to college sometimes. We wouldn't even have to go to school! We could live out in the middle of nowhere, away from everyone!

So you're going to take him away from his family? You know that Sam won't let you live on the reservation, even if you are careful. You can't take Jacob away from his friends, and his family, and his duty to the pack.

I was silent.

Besides, are you going to take away his chance for children? Jacob would be a wonderful father. You can never provide him with that. Face it; you're not good enough for him.

But he loves me…

If you really loved him, you'd leave, and give him the chance at a normal life… Give him a chance at life, with a girl who deserves him…

The voice faded away, disappearing like smoke into the wind. The only thing left was the horrible sense of dread. It was right. I would be a monster if I did that to him. I laid on the ground, curled in Jake's arms for a long time, mulling over this revelation.

"So, where have you been?" Jake whispered, interrupting my thoughts, and gently stroking my hair. I looked up at him, and was startled by look he was giving me. He met my eyes steadily, his face filled with such an expression of love, and adoration, that it nearly took my breath away.

"You know, I'm not sure." I whispered back, unable to take my eyes from his.

Look at that face. He loves me so much…. I can't hurt him.

"The best guess I can make," I continued, swallowing the lump in my throat. "Is that I was somewhere up in Canada. Alberta maybe. It took me almost two days of constant running to get back here, from wherever I was. I… err… woke up in a clearing, and there were two men there. They thought I had been injured. They kept trying to help, but-"

"Bella…. You didn't-" Jake sat up; horrified at the false conclusion he had drawn. He searched my eyes again, as if searching for some evidence of a meal.

"No! Of course I didn't!" I slapped him lightly on the shoulder. Or, at least I thought it was lightly. Judging from his wince, I guess it wasn't. "It was really hard to resist though. Eventually they left, and as soon as they did, I bolted off in the other direction. I ran away for hours and hours," I sighed, nestling closer into his warm body. "So I might have run right back into Washington for all I know. After I decided to come back, I just followed my trail back to the clearing, then followed Victoria's trail back here."

"You could follow it?! Sam tried at least ten times to follow that trail, but it never went anywhere!" Jacob exclaimed, shocked that I was able to find my way home.

"Yeah, it was easy! You guys couldn't follow it?"

"Um, no! Otherwise I would have come and found you! You wouldn't have had to wake up alone."

"Oh." I said. That was weird… I had no trouble following it. "Well, maybe it was like doing a maze backwards. It's easier to find your way to the entrance, from the end, than it is to find your way to the end, from the entrance."

"I guess that makes sense." Jacob sighed, conceding. He lay back down on the ground, and pulled me back into his arms. "You know Bells..." He sighed, looking up at the dark, cloud covered sky. "I used to be terrified of you becoming one of them. I thought it would suck-no pun intended- every good thing about you away, and that you wouldn't be Bella anymore. But, it's not that bad… you're still you! I mean, you're kinda creepy looking right now, and the whole wanting-to-eat-people-all-the-time thing isn't that hot, but you're still you!" I hit him again, and stuck my tongue out.

"Oh, and you're definitely embracing a different wardrobe." He smirked at me, as he ran his eyes over the shredded button-up I was still wearing. "That part, I like."

"Ha-ha, you're so funny." I rolled my eyes at him, and stood up in a flash. "I need some new clothes. No way in hell I'm wearing this longer than I have to. That's actually what I was on my way to do, when you so rudely interrupted me!" I put my hands on my hips, and mock-glared down at him.

"Now," I teased, turning to walk away. "If you'll excuse me, I am off to go get some more clothes. I prefer not to have creepy werewolves leer at me."

"Alright, alright. Wait up." Jake called, hopping to his feet before I could take another step. "I'm coming with you. I guess I can help you get more clothes, although I do like the homeless look you have going here. Very hip." He laughed at me, and walked over to where I was standing, tapping my foot in impatience. He stood directly in front of me, and as he looked down at me, his teasing manner suddenly vanished.

"Bella… You don't know how glad I am that you're alive. This past week, thinking you were dead, has been hell." Jake whispered, in a raspy voice.

I looked up into his face, and saw a steely determination form in his eyes. He slowly placed his hand on the side of my face, and stroked my cheekbone with his thumb. The look in his eyes both scared and excited me, and the sensation of his hand cupping my face sent chills of pleasure up my spine. I held my breath as I gazed into his eyes, transfixed by the love I saw there. Very slowly, he leaned in, and gently kissed me. I sighed, and kissed him back, raising my arms to wrap them around his neck.

How can something that is so perfect, and so right, make me feel this awful about myself?

Because, you can't hurt him. If you loved him, you would leave. Leave, and not let him follow.

End Notes: Leave someone, because you love them... Now where have I heard that before? Hmm....

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