Punk chapter: 1st person pov warnings: PROFANITY

Mr Punk, are you going to answer it?

...

Mr Punk?

...

Punk?

...

Phillip, answer the fucking phone! Or throw it against the wall that seems reasonable too.

Fuck.

Yeah.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckingfuckfuck.

It'll be-

Fucked. Fucking fucked.

How the fuck did I fuck this up? I should have fucking told him last night, I should have fucking told him instead of staring at him like a fucking moron.

Like someone in love, Mr Punk.

A FUCKING MORON. Love, fuck. Fuck! This time yesterday we were having banter, only a little banter but banter all the same, we haven't had banter in so fucking long. Fuck, I fucked this up. I should never have started this. I'm never going to have banter again. I should have just dealt with my own shit and not force it off on him.

Fuck him, fucking asshole! How fucking dare he call me a fucking whore? Fuck him! Fucking cunt, fucking self-righteous asshole!

I shouldn't have let him kiss me, I can't ever think when kisses me. Fuck, he's never going to kiss me again; I'll never have his hands in my hair, on my face again. Fuck. I want him to kiss me again. I want to not be able to think because all I can taste, all I can smell, all I can feel is him. Fuck, I'm an idiot. How the hell did I ever expect this to turn out right? How in the hell did I think you wouldn't screw me over.

"PUNK! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!" He's here, fucking banging on my fucking door. Fuck off, just fuck off Colton; I have nothing to say to you. "PHIL OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR, FUCKER!" I can't do this now, I can't. Give me some time; let me think about this, Scott. Colt, just go, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease just go away.

Where are you going, Mr Punk. Are we answering the door? No? Okay, the bathroom and I don't think punching the mirror is going to help, Punk.

Shut up! You just fucking shut the fucking hell up! You aren't helping.

He's still out there you know. Hear him talking? This is probably something you should be listening to, Mr Punk.

I don't fucking care. I don't care. I don't want to hear anything he has to say to me. I'm a fucking whore after all. How fucking dare he call me that? WHORE! I am not a fucking whore! How fucking dare he belittle me, my feelings, by accusing me of using him as practice. I fucking loved him.

Love him, Mr Punk.

Look, I don't want to talk to you right fucking now.

You do know that this is basically talking to yourself right?

I'm not fucking insane, I know.

Really? You just punched a mirror and you talk to yourself, clearly the hallmarks of sanity.

Fuck, it all seemed like it was going right, he looked happy. He kissed me, he looked at me, he fucking looked at me like I was something important, like I was the most fucking important thing in the World, like if he had to choose between me and the Fed, he'd choose me. Fuck, I've lost him, gone forever, nothing, not friends, not best friends, nothing. He's never even going to glance at me again, never mind look at me.

He's still out there.

What the fuck do I say to him? No, Colt, I'm not a whore, I'm an idiot, I'm in love with you, I think I've been in love with since the first time you held me in my sleep, I'm a fucking coward who never had the courage to tell you, I'm a fucking asshole who assumes that you understand me when clearly you don't and I'm sorry. For all I know, he might want to punch me in the fucking face, who the fuck wants to find out their best friend is in love with them? Who the fuck wants to find out that their fuck buddy wanted more than just a fuck?

He loves you, though, remember?

Does he though? I thought he understood me, I thought I understood him but obviously I don't. I don't understand the first fucking thing about him, clearly. What the fuck was I thinking assuming that he'd get that I wanted more? Fuck, just because I think in a bed, the missionary position is the standard for romance doesn't mean everyone else agrees. He was probably just fucking humouring me. The fucking asshole was probably just using me to get off. He's the fucking whore, not me!

Mr Punk?

I was so sure, so fucking sure I was right. I was so fucking sure that this wouldn't blow up in my face, that I was going to get this one thing right.

Punk?

I never do though, I always fuck things up. Always the things I want to be true the most, they're the ones I'm the most wrong on.

Punk, Phil?

Always so fucking blind to the truth.

Don't cry, Phil, it'll get better.

I was so fucking sure he loved me.

bitter-alisa:Colt was an idiot but he'll get better, we're on the home straight now, he's going to sort things out, eventually. I don't think this is as angsty as I wanted it to be to be honest. :-/ Thank you for the compliment to my smut... I was kind of worried that rimming might turn some people off when I was reading it through. I'm inspiring? Me?! :D Yay! :3

Guest: I think the Punk chapter may be a little bit of a let down. No matter how I wrote it I couldn't get him to do an alternate track to chapter 9, so we just went with the aftermath. (I do like Punk in chapter 9, he was fun to write.)

InYourHonour: A few well choosen words can be worth more than an entire novel, as a reviewer I write novels (ask bitter-alisa) and sometimes I think they get a little much. Your little reviews never fail to make me smile! Especially as you were the first person to review this story, I was completely sure no-one would even look at it, so you have a special spot in my mind.

agd88: Thanks for the encouragement! Hope it lives up to expectations!

alizabethianrose: Gimme a bit, it's a long story, its going to take me making notes to review Twisted Seduction properly! Thanks for your words of encouragement and praise, I'm super flattered! Although don't read this at work! I don't want people getting fired because of me!

The original write-up of this chapter, started at 07:00, was much longer but after several hours of editing, rewrites, cigarettes and hot water, it got striped down to under 1000 words, at 17:27. Punk chapters are hard work.

As I said the end is nigh, so if anyone has any requests or suggestions for what I should do once I'm done here, I'll take them because as of right now I have nothing! :D