You know what, I don't own Full metal Alchemist.

Mustang didn't sleep well that night. The look in Riza's eyes scared him a little. She was so focused, like she knew they didn't have much time. But as for what she was so crunched for time was a mystery to him. By the time he did fall asleep it was only a couple of hours till he had to wake up. Groggy, he dressed and made his way to her room. He knocked softly, not knowing if he should just go in like he usually did. A 'come in' greeting came from the other side of the door and he made his way in.

Riza was sitting on the bed with only a towel on her upper body. She still had her pants on, but the seemed to be pulled very low on her hips. Mustang just stared at her, not able to process what he was seeing. The scene suggested that she was a little more desperate for comfort that he original thought, but he would never take advantage of her like that. He told her that he would never use her when she was in pain, and he meant it.

"Riza, I don't really think this is the best idea…"

"Do you remember when I was badly hurt, and was bed ridden for weeks?"

"Of course I do. You got cut by that tree and I wasn't here to help you. Why do you bring that up?"

"I lied to you. There wasn't a tree that fell on me. And no matter what you would have done, I would have gotten hurt while you were away. If you hadn't left that time, then it would have been when you went on a supply run to Central. There wasn't anything you could have done. I was going to be in pain regardless."

Mustang's jaw wasn't sure which action was appropriate. It wanted to drop open at the words his blonde was saying, but he didn't want her to think he couldn't handle whatever she was telling him. There was more to it, and he had to know. He went over to her and knelt down, taking her hand that wasn't clutching the towel around her shoulders.

"What happened Riza?"

"You'll see."

Riza stood up only turn around. She put her knee on the bed and proceeded to lay on her stomach, just like she did when he had been hurt. She spread the towel out so that it could easily be removed and brought her arms up to her face. Her face turned to face Mustang, and she gave him a nod, telling him to remove the towel. Mustang approach the edge of the towel with care, almost as if he didn't want to know what was underneath. Slowly he pulled back the cloth, eyes brimming over with tears when he realized what the hell had happened to his blonde.

"That bastard. That fucking bastard."

All down her back, from the nape of her neck to the very low hem of her pants, was his life's work. Heavily encrypted notes about Flame Alchemy. They took up her entire back, forever scarring her. He slowly touched it, being ever so gentle. At this point he didn't even give a damn that the secrets of Flame alchemy were sitting before his eyes. All he could see was Riza being laid on her stomach while her father took a tattoo needle to her back. Of course he waited for Mustang to be out of the house. If, no, when he heard her screams he would have found what the bastard was doing and probably would have numbered his days right then and there. How could he do this to his only daughter? She was so innocent. She never hurt anyone. Sure, she loved to shoot, but it was out of a fierce protectiveness. It was almost as it her guns made her a mother. She cared for others by ensuring their safety. And she did that with her guns. No, there was nothing that this women did to deserve this. On top of the pain of a huge tattoo such as this there was also the fact that she would now be a target if it ever got out what has encrypted under her head. She would have to go into hiding, never allowing herself to be caught. She couldn't even escape by dying, because then it would be all too easy for them to get the information when she wasn't moving. Dammit! This was like giving her a death sentence. How could he do this to her!

"Riza. O god. If I had known I would have…"

"Roy, I told you. There was nothing you could have done. Father would have waited till you were gone for some reason or another, then he would have…"

"GOD DAMMIT I WOULD HAVE TAKEN YOU AWAY FROM HERE."

His outburst startled her. She did think he would be so upset. She actually figured he would be glad that he could finally be able to learn the lost art. But his tears, they were over her? She attributed them to being happy to finally see the research notes. Yes it hurt like hell to get the tattoo, but she didn't know he cared that much.

"It really wasn't that bad. It took so long to heal because there was so much."

"How long?"

"How long what?"

"How long did it take to tattoo you?"

"O. uh, well. We started at sunrise two days after you left. He worked until it was time to go to bed that night. It went on like that for four days. He already had the notes in his mind, but because he was remembering instead of copying it took longer to make sure he had everything right."

"Did you agree to this?"

"Well, yes and no. Father asked me if I was willing to keep his life's work a secret. I told him of course. That is when he showed up with the needle and ink. He told me I could scream if I wanted to, that listening to me scream was his punishment for putting this on me. I didn't scream at first though. I didn't want him to feel bad. But after a few hours it got to be too much. He go to my spine and I let out a blood curdling scream. He almost had a heart attack right there. But he didn't stop. He kept going and I kept screaming. He had me answer the phone ever night when you called, so that you wouldn't suspect something was wrong. At one point I decided it was too painful to walk, so that is when he started to answer, claiming I was sick."

Mustang didn't know how to process this information. The only think he could see was his blonde, writhing in pain, all the while her father kept a focused look on his face. It made him want to puke.

"There is some pens and paper in my desk. You can get started decoding now."

"What makes you think I am going to study this? This is torture. I will not benefit from this."

"You can't do that!"

Riza turned over quickly and looked Mustang straight in the eye. His face was one of defeat, as if someone had died that he could have saved. She took his face in her hands and forced him to look in her eyes.

"I suffered this. I went through weeks of pain for this. You will not tell me that I went through this for nothing. There is no one else out there I would trust with this. You are the only shot for this scar on my back to mean something. Please tell me my father didn't put me through this for nothing! Please!"

Mustang just stared at her. He couldn't possible benefit from her pain. And yet, she had a point. If no one ever used the knowledge contained on her back then the pain she endured would be for nothing. He debated this for a long while, weighting each pro and con.

"Roy, please. Please."

"Okay. I'll study it. But you have to promise me you will never show anyone this tattoo. No one must know that this is here. You will be a target. I will keep the secret. You never have to worry about that."

"No problem. Last thing I want is to be pursued for this shit."

"Go ahead and lay back down."

Riza went back into her default position, knowing that she was going to be like this for some time. Mustang got off the bed, and she assumed he was going to get the pens and paper out of the desk. But when she didn't hear the drawers open she lifted her head to the side to see what he was doing.

"What are you doing? Why are you taking your shirt off?"

"Because. You have to lie there half naked for the next few weeks. I know that can't be very comfortable. So also long as you have to be naked, I will be too."

The statement was simple enough. Equivalent exchange in some twisted way. She was barring her secrets to this man, so he was barring his secrets to her. When she saw him undo his belt she stated to speak up.

"Uh Roy, I only have to take my shirt off. What are you doing?"

"When have you not seen me with my shirt off? If you are barring your self, I will too."

All she could do was stare as he removed his trousers, standing there in his standard issued military boxers. But soon he wasn't even wearing those. He was standing there, just as exposed as she was. He came down to the side of the bed and knelt down next to her face.

"Don't worry. I have no intentions of taking you. I would never use your pain for my benefit. I just want to bear some of the burden here. You can't be the one making all the sacrifices. I will share in them."

With that he gave her a quick kiss and rose. Turning around he proceeded to the desk to retrieve the study supplies. He then came back to the bed and picked Riza up to slide her a little to the side. He sat himself on the bed next to her, his head facing her back and the top part of his thigh touching the side of hers. He then touched her back, trying to decided the best place to start. When he finally found a good place he was about to get started when a thought occurred to him.

"Riza, you have seen me study before, right?"
"Yes. All the time. Why?"

"Well, when I get going i seem to get lost. I'll probably be all over your back, trying to put the code together. So I am sorry in advance if I do something uncomfortable. If this gets to be too much, just tell me. We can stop and rest."

"Okay. Will do."

That's when Mustang got going. He went back to his starting point and couldn't seem to keep his fingers off of her. They were constantly running from one stop to the other, trying to proverbially connect the dots. Riza laid there, mesmerized. She had many nightmares of Mustang doing this. Of him hovering over her, treating her like a book with important information he needed to know instead of the woman she was. But it was as if he knew exactly what would make her feel at ease. As he raise up and looked for a new spot, his body would brush up against her. Every movement sent shivers up her spine which she was pretty sure wasn't helping with the reading. It wasn't like she had dreamed. It was better. He was respecting her body, leaning down to kiss her softly on the back when she started shaking too much. His touch was also gentle. It was almost like as he researched her he was also caressing her.

After around three hours she needed a break. Her back was aching from the position she was laying in and she really needed to see his face. She found an opening when he lifted his hands to write something down, so she rolled over on her back. The bottom half of her was covered, but she was still exposing her front. But he didn't stare, he simple looked her in the eye and asked if she was tired. She answered yes and he got up from the bed. He set the paper on the desk and came back over to lay with her. She was on her right side now with her back to the wall, so Mustang laid on his left side facing her. He asked if she was cold and then felt her arm. Apparently she must have been, cause get leaned up to get the covers that had been cast to the ground. He wrapped them over around her and then brought her closer to him, hugging her and resting his chin on top of her heard.

"Aren't you cold too?" Riza asked him. He simply shook his head 'no' and smiled at her.

"You have been moving around in the open air without any clothes on, and you want me to believe that you aren't cold?"

"To tell the truth, I feel like I am on fire."

"Huh?"

"You really can't tell? I though it was way too obvious."

Having a flashback to human anatomy class a few years ago, Riza put two and two together. And that sum added up to one really big four (more like eight and three quarters, but who's counting?) She suddenly felt very warm herself, and pulled the cover down a little.

"Like I said, I will deal. You already suffered your share of the pain. This is mine."

"Okay. Thank you. For everything, really."

"What do you mean? If it weren't for me you wouldn't have to go through all this."

"Nonsense. And that is not what I am talking about. Remember when I would wake screaming? I told you I was dreaming of my attacker, but that wasn't completely true. I did dream of him, but he was in the position your are in now. He was looking me over like a book, trying to decode the secrets my father left. And then when it got too much for him, he took out his frustration on me, using his hand to hold down my face so I couldn't breathe."

The only thing Mustang could do was hold her closer and kiss her forehead. When she stared shaking like she was going to cry he lifted her head so that he could calm her fears. Her mouth was already open, so Mustang went ahead and made entrance. She was shocked at first, but soon she melted into him. She allowed herself to form to his physic, while his hands searched hers. As soon as she was calm he pulled away, giving her the most loving of faces. She closed her eyes, and as if a huge weight had been lifted she drifted off to sleep.

Once she was snoozing Mustang got up and went to the bathroom. He was not going to take her, not like this. He would suffer through the frustration and endure the pain, especially if it meant easing hers. He reluctantly made his release, knowing that even he wouldn't be able to last long if he didn't vent somehow. He went back to his blonde and turned her on her stomach so that he could begin the research again. He would try to do as much as he could while she was sleeping. Hopefully with him touching her in her sleep she would be able to sleep nightmare free. And maybe some of the guilt could lift off his shoulders.

He watched her peacefully, wishing with all his heart he could go back in time and save her. How many more people were going to get hurt waiting for him to grow up? He had to stop wasting time and man up. With new fervor, he continued studying his blonde's back, knowing that with this knowledge he was going to make a change for good.

Hey, its pinkeminamae. i just wanted to touch base with yall for a second. You know that I am following the canon as close as possible, right? which means that if you know anything about this show you know what happens next, right? RIGHT? Gah! I've been having so much fun writing this, but now we are getting into the nitty-gritty. This is were the downward spiral happens folks. Just be prepared, okay?