Part 2
A Heart Full of LOVE
The next two weeks were spent bingeing the entirety of Steven Universe, with the episode order being decided by Ash, to whom Sai had given a list of episode synopses. The order that Ash felt best had been something like: "The Return," "Jailbreak," "Political Power," "The Message," "Giant Woman," "Future Vision," "Marble Madness," "Warp Tour," "Rose's Scabbard"… in other words, the watch order was driven primarily by Ash's refusal to watch things in chronological order, and her desire to gain context for Jailbreak. She hadn't even admitted that she was going to finish the show until they were halfway through the second season.
It was the third season before she bothered watching things chronologically. Even so, she'd already watched the last episode of seasons three through nine, just to assure herself that the show wasn't headed for a downer ending, and then contrasted the final episode with the show's pilot just to check the quality of bookends.
"Sai."
"Ash."
"Your character was inspired by Bloodstone."
"Most likely."
"By Ronaldo Fryman."
"Ronaldo's my favorite character for a reason, Ash."
By the fifth season, she was well and truly hooked.
Sai just sat there, more than happy to fangirl with Ash. The Romulans watched mostly in silence, though they did stay and watch, rather than leaving to pursue their own interests.
When they'd gotten through the ninth season, Ash spent nearly a day afterwards in dumbfounded amazement.
"Sai," she said, eventually.
"Yeah, Ash?"
"I was insufferably rude to all of them," she said, her eyes unfocused in mortified flashback. "And I'm never going to get to apologize."
Sai patted Ash's arm. "I'm sure they'll forgive you."
"Yes," said Ash. "Of course they will. Doesn't mean I feel any better about it."
They watched other shows after that, including a few of the sillier episodes of Star Trek TOS from Ash's home universe, but none had the emotional impact of Steven Universe.
Though, they did offer their own amusements.
"Ash."
"Yes, Sai?"
"You didn't tell me that the Vulcans were space-elves."
Ash blinked.
"You didn't tell me that you were a space racist."
It was through this digital marathon, however, that they started to really get to know the four Romulans.
How Dionysus loved dramas and mysteries, and enjoyed talking over the characters when he spotted plot holes.
How Diaspore loved anything that was an adaptation or infotainment, and who seemed to enjoy nothing so much as a good documentary.
How Athena's favorites were usually comedies, and not necessarily highbrow ones at that. She was the best at replacing dialogue or theme songs with parodies or jokes.
How Mesolite's enjoyment of things was usually directly proportional to the number of explosions they contained. She was the best of them at video games.
They'd been able to rest, to take a load off. To get to know the kids and such. They even got bored enough to start going through Sai's collection of abridged series.
Many words could be used to describe that experience, but the most accurate was probably, 'meta.'
Though that's not to say that the whole thing was all sunshine and rainbows, either.
"Sai, Four Stories Short got a movie in this universe."
"Watch it?"
"Watch it."
Two hours later:
"That was the worst movie I've ever seen," said Sai, aghast.
"Including Alien Three?" asked Ash.
Sai shook her head. "Ash, I've never seen any of the Alien movies."
Ash was taken aback. "Not even the first two?"
"No. Why did you see them?" asked Sai, perplexed. "They seem a little… dark for you. You're usually into camp, right?"
"The Alien Franchise is totally camp!" Ash protested.
"…how?"
Ash tried to wrap a hand around Sai's shoulders, discovered she didn't have the reach, and slapped her on the back instead, before going the console and waving expansively. "To answer that question, we first have to watch a film by the title of 'Dark Star.'"
Two hours later:
"Okay," said Sai, "so what did that have to do with anything?"
"Dark Star was a low budget film," answered Ash, "one which some of its creators were never entirely happy with, regardless of its cult status. You know Pinback?"
"Yeah."
"He's played by Dan O'Bannon, who later got to go on to make a high-budget sci-fi thriller."
"Alien?" asked Sai.
"Yeah," agreed Ash. "He wanted to make a film with a realistic extraterrestrial, to make up for the beach ball with polka dots and duck feet."
"…and he made up for it with the Alien Franchise?"
Ash nodded. "More or less. If you watch the first one, you can see all kinds of parallels. Here, I'll start it."
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" said Sai, with a glance at the four kids.
"We've already seen the security footage," said Athena. "I doubt it'll be any worse than what we've already witnessed."
Sai shrugged. "If they're okay with it, I'm fine, too."
Two Hours Later:
"Oh. My. God," said Sai.
"We're not done yet!" said Ash, as she started Aliens.
Two Hours Later:
"Wow," said Sai, blinking. "On to the next one?"
Ash frowned. "No, the third movie never happened."
"What?" said Sai, caught off guard.
Ash's frown deepened into a scowl. "I refuse to acknowledge that the third movie happened. We can watch the last two later, if you want… but they don't deserve to stand by the first two. Wanna watch some Star Trek instead?"
Sai fumbled at the abrupt change in gears. "I'd actually prefer something a bit more… serious."
Ash took offense. "Star Trek is totally serious!"
"…How?" wondered Sai, although she sounded considerably more resigned than the previous time she'd asked the same question.
Ash brought her hands together to stop them from flailing. "Gene Roddenberry wanted to write a show that tackled social and political issues of the day, but didn't think he'd be able to get it past the censors… so he disguised it as a show about space cowboys."
Sai frowned. "But it had Sexism. And Sixties Hair. And Shatner."
"And meaning," said Ash, typing into the console. "Here: 'Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.' Let's watch this one."
Forty minutes later:
"This was about racism on earth, wasn't it?" asked Sai.
"'The Measure of a Man,'" said Ash, grinning. "Let's go!"
Thus, they proceeded to watch Star Trek for the next week.
But, of course, things eventually swung right back around to serious again.
"Ash?"
"Sai?"
"I was going to watch the third and fourth Alien movies when you weren't around, because it seemed to bother you… but I forgot that I was searching the ship's database and not your files."
Ash thought it over for a minute before it finally hit her. "There's a counterpart movie for Alien in this universe?"
"There is," said Sai. "Also, on a completely unrelated note, the humans in this universe are not part of the Federation."
Realization dawned on Ash's face. "No…"
"Yes."
"What is it?" asked Diaspore, coming to see what all the ruckus was about.
"Humans in this universe are xenophobes…" said Sai, "and that's putting it lightly."
Two hours later:
"Thematically, it's the same as Alien," observed Sai, while Ash sat, ashen-faced, beside her. "It's even called 'Alien.' But the protagonists are non-humanoid members of the Federation, and the unknown monsters… are homo sapiens..."
"Is.. is this what humans are like in your universe?" asked Dionysus.
"Not… exactly," said Ash, hesitant, "but at the same time, I can't say that I'm surprised."
And, of course:
"Sai."
"Ash."
"You based your physical form on Voldemort from A Very Potter Musical?"
"Well, not completely," said Sai, with a grin, "but that was where I got the idea to combine bare chest with sparkly cape…" she admitted.
"What about your eyes?" asked Ash.
"Utility," said Sai. "They allow me to encrypt ciphers which cannot be cracked with the naked eye, gem or human."
"The camouflage?" said Ash.
"Based on a meme, and also Walt Whitman," said Sai. "'Do you want to be seen or not?' / Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself. I am vast. I contain multitudes.'"
"What did you look like on Homeworld?" Ash wondered.
Sai shapeshifted, and suddenly, it was like another Gem was there altogether. She had no cape, and therefore much more cloth to work with. She had a shirt. And shoes. And hair. Her clothes were a brown uniform with white accents, and a white diamond insignia on her chest. Her skin was green. Her hair as well, styled into a short bob. Her eyes were black. Solid black, and were smooth and flat as windowglass.
Then, she blinked, and Sai was back to her normal appearance.
"In a word?" said Sai, "Boring."
They'd been stranded for about six months, when the kids finally reached puberty.
According to Sai's readings of the medical scanners in sickbay, Diaspore was a Queen, and not merely tall for her age, as they'd all thought. In a few more weeks, she'd be able to reach out telepathically to other hives for help. Of course, that wasn't an action entirely without risk, either.
"We should probably make ourselves scarce," said Ash, "I doubt the Romulan Empire would react well to our presence."
"If you can do it safely, it might be wise to disappear for awhile," Diaspore agreed, "but… could you come back in six months? We'd like to see you both again, once we're settled."
"Well, no promises if we're captured," said Sai, "but we'll do our best."
"We can go hang out in the creepy computer room," Ash agreed. "If we're still free in six months, we'll come visit."
With that, they said their goodbyes and went to sleep.
When Clara Hart went to sleep in the Egyptian Dorms of the Afterlife, she always went to her own Earth. When Cultivar Muscovite slept there, she always went to her own Earth, in Steven's Universe.
When Celadon went to sleep in the Dorms, she always went to the ship with the four Romulans, in the Star Trek/Alien fusion 'verse.
In the Trek 'verse, Ash and Sai had been spending at least eight hours a day fused as Celadon, so that Ash wouldn't need to sleep.
This was not because they were afraid of going back to the dorms (though of course they were afraid), it was instead because the dorms were no longer where they went when they slept, and the place that they did go to was rather… disconcerting.
In terms of dimensions, it was exactly like the dorm room they'd shared: a one bedroom apartment with two beds in the main living space. Same furniture. Same furniture placement. Everything that was in their old room was there, save for fact that there was no door.
Also, the fact that all of it was invisible.
When touched, the beds, the chairs, the walls and floors, were all still there, but all that could be seen was the unforgiving black void of space.
Upon each of their beds, there rested a completely ordinary (so far as they could tell) laptop computer.
It was an incredibly obvious trap.
And the two of them currently had no intention of being caught.
Their working plan was to spend the six months fused as Celadon and meditating. On the floor, because like hell were they touching the mysterious-computers-of-(quite-possibly)-death. This was the first time Sai had been in this particular room, and something about it pinged something within her memories. She figured she'd talk to Ash about it when they were Celadon, be a nice conversation to get the ball rolling. Wasn't like there was anything else to do, and the current plan seemed solidly decent to Sai.
There was one little problem with it, however. And that was this:
When they regained consciousness in the invisible room, there was already someone there.