Chaoji tries to screw in a light bulb – Failure
During one of his staring contests with his lamp, Chaoji noticed that it wasn't glowing as radiantly as usual. It took him a few minutes, but he finally figured out why. His light was missing a light bulb! (Now what happened to it, we don't want to go into).
Too lazy to get up, he screamed as loud as he could for help, sitting with his head thrown back. After a while, he became hungry and had no choice but to move to his secret stash of cookies. Inside the cabinet were also light bulbs!
"How convenient," he thought aloud. Chaoji liked 'convenience' – it was his biggest word, and it usually meant he didn't have to move.
He ripped the box of light bulbs open with his teeth, getting only a little carried away, swallowing not the entire box, but just pieces. This is part of his diet.
He dumped the light bulbs onto the floor, breaking two of them. He picked up a whole one and staggered over to his lamp. Reaching it, he began to slam the bulb into the lamp with all the strength he could possible muster. Unfortunately, as you probably remember (though The Fatass doesn't this time around) he has the Innocence of strength. The bulb shattered into a million pieces, one of which flew upward and stabbed him in the eye.
"AUUUGHHHHHHHMUFFINSAUGH!" he screamed randomly.
A few hours later, when someone actually passed his lair, also known as The Grande Fridge, a knock came on his door.
"Did I hear screaming?" Lenalee called from behind the door.
"AUUUGHHHHHHHDONUTSWITHOUTANAUAUGH!!" he hollered.
Lenalee and Allen opened the door, rushing over to him. "Chaoji, blood is gushing out of your eye like water streams out of a stream!"
At the sound of the words 'Chaoji, blood is gushing out of your eye', a thousand camera flashes went off outside of his room as Lavi took pictures of this long awaited event to sell to all the finders, scientists, and exorcists. He might be able to make Kanda buy some, even.
Failure.
Authors' notes: We realize light bulbs weren't invented at this time.
Unfortunately, no Chaojis were hurt in the making of this.
Happy Tenth Episode! We're 10 there!