I remember about that day
As the snow that dances in the night sky
Begins to fall again
000
You were always only looking forward
And it seemed like you'd go somewhere far away
000
My feelings for you won't reach you, and you don't even notice them
I've been pining for you for so many winters that I can't even count
000
It can't be requited, it won't be fulfilled
But I'm still in love with you
It's never ending.
Even if it's painful, my heart won't freeze.
000
Fuyu no Owari Ni – Naruto The Last.
10. Winter memories.
It hurts to remember.
She keeps thinking about it while her friends enjoying their drinks in the comfortable warmth of the room – at least Renji, Matsomoto, and Hanataro – while Rukia and Hitsugaya-taicho, who don't find the cold to be a problem, have gone out to light the fireworks.
Hinata steps out of the room, too, and watches the sky from the corridors. The cold breeze on her skin feels good. It wasn't always like that, even if she had always liked winter, but since she died and found Fuyu no Tsuki, she feels more comfortable with this weather.
It's a cold night, like the time when she died.
The snow covers everything, just like that time she met Naruto for the first time.
Is it also winter in Konoha? The time transcurs quite differently in Seireitei from the living world, that much she knows, but the difference from a different dimension… that, she can't really tell.
The Kuchiki Manor is a very elegant and beautiful place. It reminds her a bit of the Hyuga compound.
Here, too, the sight during Hanami would surely be beautiful.
"It's probably the most beautiful at dawn."
"You think so?" Captain Kuchiki asks, suddenly standing by her side.
"Kuchiki-taicho!" she jumps backwards "I didn't mean it's not beautiful now. It's only that reminds me of my own Clan's compound." She's still nervous from their last conversation, but really she shouldn't be. He'd believed her and taken things better than expected (he hasn't mentioned any punishment for hiding information, either). Eventually, she will have to talk about everything.
Again. Breath in, breath out.
"Do you know, taichou, in a time like this my uncle died. It happened that someone kidnapped me when I was three years old, to get my eyes. My father saved me, but he killed an important ninja from a rival village, and they demanded his death. The Hyuga clan is one of the old and proud clans of Konoha, and protecting the Byakugan is more important than anything else. In order to protect his brother, my uncle sacrificed himself instead. They were twin brothers, looked exactly the same… except that my father was the leader of the clan, and my uncle belonged to the Branch family. Because of this, Neji-niisan hated me for years. There's a lot of hate in the shinobi world."
This new information surprises Byakuya, even if it makes sense, given Hinata's manners and the way she carries herself, that she belonged to a Noble family.
Realizing she has said too much, Hinata blushes.
"I'm sorry for bothering you with my words, taicho."
If there's one thing he doesn't like about Hinata, though, is that she's always apologizing, even when she clearly shouldn't. Everything she says about her shinobi world is relevant now, and she knows this as well, so why does she apologize?
Byakuya can only sigh.
"I agree, the view it's even more beautiful in the morning, when the sun rises." He surprises her by saying this. "My beloved Hisana liked to come here earlier during spring, just to admire the cherry blossoms, but her health didn't allow it as much as she would have liked it."
It is surprising, a man who considers his honor and pride the most important, still married for love, defying his entire family. She would have done the same for Naruto.
In a sense, both of them are similar in that they had a duty with their Clan, being born with the names they were born with, but their personalities made it difficult for them to fulfill the expectations, as much as they would have liked to. Hinata, too, was proud of her heritage and wanted to be an Heiress that the Hyuga Clan wouldn't be ashamed to have. Yet she failed them time after time.
Kuchiki Byakuya is, then, an incredible person in her eyes.
"Kuchiki-taicho, I truly admire your character." Hinata says, expressing her most sincere feelings. "The worth of a man is in his unwavering heart. Your wife, Hisana-sama, was a very lucky woman, I'm sure she was very happy with you."
To these thoughts, Senbonzakura scoffs. If only that had been the case…
"Do not imagine me a better man than I am. Hisana wasn't happy, she couldn't be. Her thoughts were constantly filled with guilt and the need to find her sister, and I could only fulfill her wish when she had already passed away."
Hinata's eyes don't look at him with compassion, as his closest friends do, or reproach as the elders used to. There is only understanding in them.
"We can't control how others feel. We can't take the pain from them either. We can only be by their side… if you did that, then you did all you could have done." Hinata says "I told this to Rukia once: I think I can understand your wife's feelings. A big sister's heart will always put a sister first, but that doesn't mean that there's no room for other feelings, too. If the circumstances were different, I would have cherished my love better too."
He did well in choosing her. When Byakuya first saw her in the academy, he was slightly impressed by her abilities. Even so, in that moment he couldn't know if she'd really do for lieutenant for the time Renji got his promotion. Hinata hasn't disappointed, yet he realizes know there's so much he ignores…
"She's stronger that she looks." Senbonzakura comments.
"You're speaking unnecessarily again."
"Master, I am not the one who's been outside in the cold for twenty minutes just talking to a girl."
"Senbonzakura, have you forgotten your place?"
"Taicho, look!" It seems like Rukia and Hitsugaya-taicho finally learned to light the fireworks. The colored and bright lights paint sky. "It's beautiful."
He stares at her.
"Yes, beautiful indeed."
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