Since I put out some blankets for my family of Poi's because I didn't have the heart to wake them up to tuck them all properly into bed, I went straight to sleep with my girls after I sent everyone off. It had been a while since we'd all slept in the living room, and seeing that it's summer and nights usually get pretty humid, spending a night in the living room didn't sound so bad.

But Yuudachi and I were woken up by the doorbell ringing. I'm the kind of person who gets easily woken up by things like alarm clocks or doorbells or anything that dings or dongs...I guess, for a lack of a better term. Usually whenever I get woken up by the doorbell, my first thought is usually something like "Oh shoot, how long did I leave them waiting?"

So I bolt up to my feet as Yuudachi moans with sleepiness and slowly rubs her chin on the heads of our cuddled twin Poi's. I'm the only one in the house who's able to bolt up awake as soon as I wake up. And here I was thinking that usually it's the girls who're supposed to be like that...guess not.

"Coming, hold on!" I yell as I approach the door, since I need to change out of yesterday's clothes and hop into new ones. "Who is it?"

"It's Akitsushima, Lieutenant!" a familiar sweet voice calls. "I've brought breakfast, kamo!"

"Kamo!"

I feel my face brighten - Akitsushima was part of our detachment at Yokosuka, and she was a reliable and hardworking seaplane tender I quickly grew to like and respect. She, too, got married after our decommission and has since had a daughter of her own, who, not surprisingly, is also named Akitsushima, who is also a sweet and bright, energetic kid.

"Oh, okay!" I open the door for them, checking that it really is them through the peephole first, and Akitsushima and her daughter wave good morning to me.

"Lieutenaaaaaant~!" Akitsushima squeals, lunging forward for a hug, since it's been quite some time since we'd last seen each other - and by "quite some time", I mean four days. But before she glomps the daylights out of me, I put my hand in her face to block her.

"Hold on, hold on!" I try to explain the situation quickly. "We had Shigure and Harusame over for a little bit, and my entire family just fell asleep right there in the living room, so I need to take a shower and change clothes and everything - "

"Ohhhh~? But I don't mind a sweaty and dirty Lieutenant, uuueeheheheheheheheeeee~!" Akitsushima pulls on quite a naughty face and slowly creeps towards me with outstretched hands whose fingers are oscillating like the tendrils of coral. "I bet you smell absolutely delicious, kamo~!"

"Yuudachi!? Yuudachiiiii, you're about to get reverse netorare'd! Yuudachiiiiii?!" I scream in mock fright towards the living room, backing away from the seaplane tender. "A-Akitsushima, think about your child! Your daughter! She shouldn't be seeing something like this!"

"But Kaa-shan always talks about you, Lieutenant, kamo!" Chibi Akitsushima, as she's known to be called, pipes up.

"That's even worse! And also, I'm no longer 'Lieutenant', how many times do I have to tell you!"

Akitsushima pouts. "But I'm used to calling you Lieutenant, kamo. You're Colonel, now, right?"

"Yeah!"

"Eeeehhh...Colonel doesn't sound as cool as Lieutenant."

"That's not the problem here!"

Yuudachi's voice trails out real sleepily from the living room. "Fueeeehhh...? Akitsushimaaaa-chaaaaan, is'zat youuuuuu, poooooiiii...?"

"Yeah, Yuudachi-chan! We're here to visit, kamo!"

"Okaaayyyy...you can...take his clothes off...for his shower...poooooiiii-zzzzzzzz..." Yuudachi goes straight back to sleep mid-poi, and with official permission from my wife, Akitsushima's eyes turn into sharp sparkles of opportunity.

"Search and destroy initiative engaged," Akitsushima giggles with the creepy laughter of a sexual predator, and she's already drooling. "Akitsushima, sortieing!"

"THIS ISN'T SOMETHING YOU SHOULD BE SORTIEING FOR!"

So long story short, I ended up getting my upper clothes ripped off and my chest glomped. I swear that I am a totally faithful husband with absolutely no desire for adultery - it's just Akitsushima, even after all these years out of service and married to her own husband, has still nurtured a fondness for me that I don't know if I still understand completely. The worst part about it all's that my own wife, Yuudachi, seems to be totally okay with it. One of these days Akitsushima's going to take it a bit too far...but hopefully she has the sense not to do that. Kamo...

After taking a morning shower (most people in Japan don't take showers in the morning, but I'd developed a habit of it during my training as an officer since our physical training was in the morning), I change clothes and head into the kitchen to find, to my surprise, Yuudachi already in the middle of making breakfast together. Akitsushima was a common teammate and squadmate for many of the ship girls at Yokosuka, because her assignment as a seaplane tender, especially her flying boat Taitei-chan, gave her a unique role of being a close air support ship girl able to deploy her flying boat instantly for a huge volume of machine gun fire, something that the normal carriers couldn't do - provide instant air support. Thus, we sent Akitsushima frequently with our destroyer squadrons for patrol missions and scouting missions, since she and her Taitei-chan was really good at getting other ship girls quickly out of a bind or a bad situation. And given the fact that Yuudachi and Shigure were two of our strongest destroyers at Yokosuka, Akitsushima was naturally assigned with them for many missions.

Because they've got breakfast nailed down, I decide to head over to the living room to turn on the TV for the kids. By this time, the twins have woken up and are playing with Chibi Akitsushima, who's the spitting image of her mother, just with different colored eyes. Chibi Akitsushima absolutely adores Ishii and Hisashi, so she just spends all of her time at our house just glomping them all day, which, fortunately, the puppies don't mind.

But as I turn the TV on for them and switch channels to the kids' programs, I can't help but think about the mystery between Chibi Akitsushima and the twins. For some unknown reason that eludes all logic and common sense, Yuudahachi, Sandachi, and Chibi Akitsushima never have a normal conversation. I'll demonstrate what a typical conversation between those two is like:

"Poi?"

"Kamo!"

"Poi poi?"

"Kamo..."

"Poooi!"

"Kamo, kamo!"

"Poi..."

"Kamo?"

"Poi poi poi."

"Kamoooooo..."

"...ka...ka..."

"Kamo! Kamo!"

"Uuuu...ka...k...k...kaamm..."

"Kamo!?"

"...K-Ka...kamopoi!"

"..."

"Kamopoi? Kamopoi! Poikamo? Poi!"

"...kamo..."

"Kamopoi!"

"Kamo...poi...kamo."

So like, maybe, this's, like, maybe, a conversation about, like, ducks...maybe. Just maybe...

Their speech is bizarre. They only talk like this to each other. [Verbal Tics Intensify]. My jimmies are beginning to be quite rustled.

I just like watching our puppies. Whenever they hear Chibi Akitsushima talk with the twins, they treat it like some sort of TV special, and they sit down and watch them talk like it's the most entertaining stuff in the whole wide world. Their faces turn back and forth from Chibi Akitsushima to the twins like the faces of a tennis audience watching a live tennis match as they watch the ball. It's so fun to watch the puppies that way.

This time, I decide to join in on their little cryptic conversation that only they seem to understand, just for the lulz.

"Poi," I say, leaning in to join them. They turn to me too.

"Poi~!" my twins chime in simultaneously.

"Kamo..." goes Chibi Akitsushima.

"Poikamo?"

"...poi...kamo...?" little Akitsushima looks at me interestedly. "Poikamo!"

"Poi poi! Pooi!" Sandachi angrily calls over. "Kamopoi! Kamopooooi!"

But Chibi Akitsushima shakes her head firmly. "Poikamo!"

"Kamopoi!"

"Poikamo!"

As I thought, I don't get this at all.

"Deaaaars! Breakfast is ready, kamo!" Akitsushima calls from the kitchen, and soon she comes out to check up on us in the living room. "Breakfast is ready, kamo!"

"Yeah, we heard. C'mon, you girls, food, food!" I say excitedly to get the girls excited, and Yuudahachi cheers her little cute cheer.

"Food, food~!" she goes. As the girls march in, I turn to Akitsushima.

"Akitsushima...about the girls," I mention in a low voice, "have you ever figured out what they talk about whenever they're together?"

Akitsushima shakes her head too.

"It's so weird that they talk like that. I don't even talk like that with Yuudachi-chan, kamo," Akitsushima admits. "Maybe they were meant for each other!"

"Probably. It's probably more logical to think that way at this point. Are we having, like, ducks for breakfast, maybe?"

Akitsushima pulls on my cheek for making fun of her verbal tic.