Ok. Just to let you know. There was confusion in the last chapter. I am SOOOOOO team Edward. NOT team Jacob. Jake just loves Jacob. I no like Jacob. I still don't own anything.
Ring. Ring.
"Hello?"
"Mom?"
"Hello, sweetheart. How's your day?"
"Uh? What? Oh, fine. Hmmm… have you seen Jake?"
"No. He hasn't graced me with his presence or one of his annoying phone calls."
Sigh. "Great. Just great."
"What's wrong?"
"I haven't seen him for eight hours. I haven't heard from him either."
"Really? Have you checked the pack?"
"Yeah. He's not there either."
"Is he answering his phone?"
"No. Mom, I'm so worried. If he's alive, I'm going to kill him."
"Eight hours?"
"Yeah."
"Crap."
"What?"
"Your father was yelling in the phone exactly eight hours ago."
"You don't think…"
"I don't want to think."
"Would Dad really do that?"
"I hope not. I don't think he would."
"He better not."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
"What?"
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
"I don't see what's so funny."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
"Mom!! Jake is missing and you LAUGHING?!"
"HAHAHAHAHA!! Ok, so I just drove into the driveway."
"Okkkkaaayyy."
"Guess who is there!?"
"Jake!!"
"Thank Carlisle!! So what are you laughing at?"
"Your Dad is there, too."
"…"
"Would you like to here them?"
"Yes."
Edward: SCRUB!!
Jake: Whatever. Do you have to yell?
YES!! NOW SCRUB!!
Fine!! Stupid vampire.
STUPID VAMPIRE!? I'M A STUPID VAMPIRE?! YOU ARE AN IDIOT WEREWOLF WHO WROTE ALL OVER MY CAR!! NOW SCRUB!!
Fine. Can you please put the gun down?
NO!! I SAID SCRUB DAMMIT!!
"Wow. So that's were he's been?"
"I guess so."
"Tell Dad to put the gun down."
"No. I'm video taping this."
Alice: MY PORSCHE!! MY BABY!! IT'S OK!! DON'T CRY!! WE WILL FIX THAT STUPID, IDIOTIC, BABBLING, FOOLISH WEREWOLF WHO WROTE ALL OVER YOU!! YOU ARE SO DEAD JACOB BLACK!!
"Mom!! Don't let them kill him!! Please!!"
"Fine. I'll save him. Then you take him home and ground him, is that understood?"
"Yes, Ma'm."
"Good."
"Bye. Thanks!!"
Hangs up.