Chapter 10—Cleaning Out the Clutter
The crisp crunching of conspirators on snow was the only sound aside from the delicate thud of snow tumbling towards the earth. Whispers erupted as the traitors busied themselves with the finding of The Boy.
Heavily cloaked figures huddled in a circle, discussing strategies to maintain that this accident would cease to appear in the future.
"I don't see how he could have--"
"—No one in the house except--"
"—Faithful, one of us, never to betray us--"
"—Silence! I hear something."
Stillness exploded in the empty surroundings as a lowly figure hunched behind a tree, holding his breath.
If I breathe, I die. If I don't breathe, I die.
After a couple of seconds of silence in which the cloaked figures walked closer to The Boy without knowledge of having done so, and in which The Boy thought his lungs to explode from lack of oxygen, one figure spoke.
"Honestly now! Probably an owl, it was! 'I hear something.' What a load of rubbish. Honestly, Crabbe, it be your mind that's going somewhere, not The Boy!"
Awkward laughter tumbled from the mouths of the others, not certain if laughter was allowed. The leader sighed in frustration at the stupidity of those surrounding him and they trudged on.
Seconds later, the cloaked figures had disapparated and The Boy let out his breath, wiping the sweat from his brow.
They're on to me. They know already.
Sprinting between bushes and trees, The Boy made his waytoward the village that lie only a few miles up the road.
An invisible creature squeezed between the chatting children, careful not to bump a single one. She was in no hurry, for she realized the upcoming events would not take place until night fell upon the earth.
Footprints, seemingly coming from nothing, formed in the pure white snow leading away from the Hogwarts castle. The figure making them was careful to erase all traces so that she would not be followed. Her friends, having been sworn to secrecy, knew nothing of the courageous actions she was about to take and she'd rather it be that way. If they knew the reason she was rescuing Him was out of love, they would never forgive her.
Miles layered upon each other and soon she reached a town seemingly in the middle of nowhere. The streets were empty, silent, eerie. The shops were deserted, abandoned, neglected. Nothing was as it appeared to be, as it should be. She was scared, but strode on.
Flakes of white innocence cascaded from the sky and landed on the invisible being. She shook the flecks off of the cloak and walked into the village cautiously.
It was as if someone had muted the town. The crunching of the snow underneath Hermione was the only sound and she stepped with vigilance to avoid being discovered.
She didn't know where to start. If they had him, they wouldn't hide him in someplace as open and obvious as Hogsmeade. They would go somewhere no one would find them.
They would go to the Shrieking Shack.
Hermione felt a pair of eyes on her as she hurriedly marched toward the forsaken structure. How could it be possible when she was invisible?
However, someone sensed her being. Someone knew she was there.
She hid behind a tree as if it would help disguise her alreadyundetectable self. Peering around the edge of the evergreen, a flash of light caught Hermione's eye and she cowered, closing her eyes.
Nothing happened. She expected that the Death Eater was waiting for her to move, so he could detect her by the snow lying on the cloak, however, this was not the case. She peeked around the tree again and nothing was to be seen. Passing it off as a trick of the light, she continued on her way.
Hermione felt as if she were being followed. She stopped, the footsteps stopped. She slowed, the footsteps slowed. Someone was on to her. She turned, wand in hand, spell on the tip of her tongue.
"Expelliarmus!"
A dark piece of wood flew into Hermione's hand and she opened her mouth in surprise.
"M-Malfoy?"
"Who's there!"
Hermione pulled the cloak off of herself and pulled him behind a tree.
"G-Granger?" Draco said.
"Yes, it's me. Here I am thinking horrible things are happening to you—I'm picturing torture of all kinds—and here you are, why the hell aren't you dead?"
"Nice to see you too," Draco responded, smiling.
"Sorry, it's just… I overheard a conversation… you're supposed to be dead! How in the world did you escape?"
"Granger, did you come all the way out here to rescue me?" He smirked.
"What? No. I was--"
"Sneaking out of the castle."
"—To take a stroll--"
"With an invisibility cloak. Where did you get that, by the way?"
"None of your damn business!" Hermione said, frustration rising in her voice. She took a deep breath to calm herself down.
"You did. You came to save me. How sweet. But why would you want to do something like that?" He asked, knowing the answer, but wanting to hear her say it out loud.
"I hate you."
"Quite the contrary. Hermione Granger, I believe you fancy me."
Hermione rolled her eyes and didn't smile.
"Don't push your luck. I'm still cross at you."
"Why? I didn't do anything."
"Didn't do anything? You treated me like something you stepped on that you didn't even deem worthy to stay on the bottom of your high priced shoes!"
"Yeah, well you're a stubborn ass! If you would have just listened to me and--"
"What? Believed your bullshit?"
"It was the truth!"
"Yeah, my aunt Sally! Just tell me one thing: do you have feelings for me or not?"
There was a long pause. Draco thought back to the past year at Hogwarts and the time he spent with Hermione. He thought about the way she kissed—gently and innocently. He thought about the deep conversations they got into. He thought about how appealing her body had seemed to him when he first started to notice her—when they became Heads.
Yes, there was something there. Draco enjoyed her company. She was bright and a breath of fresh air from the tedious and monotonous life he lived. She had opinions and he liked to hear them. She had a sharp tongue and they always fought, but he liked to hear what she thought. Maybe she kept Draco in line, or maybe she was slowly destroying him.
He admired Hermione. She was an intelligent human being and although a bookworm, having useless facts stored in her mind, she was interesting and easy to talk to. She was kind and cared for him quite a bit, if he did say so himself.
And she was pretty. Her golden eyes sparked with her emotions, and although she was readable, as Draco would never let himself be, she lit up a room and wore her heart on her sleeve, not ashamed of what she felt. Her hair was soft to the touch and her pale features were delicately formed to create pure innocent beauty.
Yes, he rather liked Hermione quite a bit.
But that's not what she meant.
Did he fancy her?
"Look, I, uh--"
But he stopped speaking with the snapping of a nearby twig. In one swift movement, the invisibility cloak was over the both of them, Draco ducking so that it covered his feet. And although they walked quickly back to the Hogwarts castle in silence, thoughts flooded both their heads with what should have, could have been said.
It was only when the duo arrived back into the Heads' common room that they removed the cloak, Hermione tucking it gently into her bag.
On the way up to the castle, Hermione had firmly decided that there was no way in all of London that Draco Malfoy felt something for Hermione Granger. Rather than be humiliated upon hearing these words escape Draco's mouth, Hermione decided that she would forget the question had ever sprung up.
"Look, uh, H-Hermione," Draco started, rubbing his neck. He sat down on the green couch and rubbed his head, still throbbing from the curses used on him. "About what you asked me back there--"
"—Are you okay?" Hermione asked him, hoping to distract him from the question that she dreaded the answer.
"Wh-What?"
"Are you okay? I know the Death Eaters must have tortured you at least a little."
"I'm fine," he replied.
"W-what happened?"
Draco gave a detailed account of what had happened, from meeting his father in his room, to his mother helping him escape. He would have normally never told a soul what had happened—his business was his business, but it was Hermione and she made it so easy to give in to what she wanted.
"I'm so sorry," Hermione said, tears in her eyes from his story.
"No," he replied, taking her hands in his. "I'm sorry. I was an arrogant ass and I should have never--"
"Please don't," Hermione whispered, taking her hands from his and looking away, tears running down her cheeks. She furiously wiped her wet cheeks and pulled her work into her lap.
Draco sighed and looked at the ceiling.
There was just no winning with her. True, she was stubborn and set in her ways, but so was he. She wasn't easily forgiving and Draco liked that about her, although it annoyed him to great lengths how hard it was to keep up with her and how much he had to work to be worthy of her.
However, Hermione just refused to believe that he told her the truth for once, which was not difficult to understand, but frustrating all the same. He was annoyed that she wouldn't accept his apology, but he understood why she couldn't just forgive him. He wouldn't even forgive himself! He treated her horribly.
On the other hand, he had never given her reason to believe that he would lie to her. True, he hadn't been completely straight with her from the beginning, but he hadn't lied, just denied feelings. Who would want to admit they had feelings for their arch enemy?
And who's to say Hermione didn't deny her feelings for him? Again, who would want to fall for their arch enemy? She must have denied these feelings or at least masked them and didn't that make her just as guilty as he was? Didn't that put them in the same exact situation?
No, because they were different. They were not equals. She was Head Girl, bookworm, good girl Hermione Granger, and he was Draco Malfoy, son of a Death Eater, slimy Slytherin. Just because of their outer appearance, people looked at them differently and treated them differently, which led Draco to think about what would have happened if Harry Potter had taken his hand that fateful day they met.
It was Christmas Eve and Draco wanted to tell Hermione how he felt about her. It was Christmas Eve and Lucius's present to Draco was matching bruises on his stomach.
Hermione fled the room and closed the door behind her.
Sun beams danced their way across a sleeping figure who was oblivious to anything but the nightmarish allusion that her body lured her in from the moment her imperfect golden hair had touched the heavenly soft pillow. Alluring orbs were revealed in one quick motion and her unmanicured hands swept up to rub the sleepiness out of them.
Not only was it dreadfully early, but her nightmare made its rounds through her mind, as if mocking her actions. She would have liked nothing better than to fall asleep, but with the promise of another horrific dream hanging in the air, she thought it better to rise with the sun and get some much delayed work done.
Hermione Granger had made a mistake and she was admitting it (if only in her head). She had let something be more important than her Head business, than her schoolwork. She was ashamed of herself because she hadn't meant to get so wrapped up in boys, of all things, and for crying out loud, she just wished everything wasn't so bloody difficult.
No pain, no gain. No sacrifice, no gain. No hardships, no life.
In other words, life's a bitch and then you die.
But she mustn't think such things. She was a fighter, damn it, and she never gave up. Hermione Granger was stubborn and didn't do something unless she intended to finish it the proper way.
Is that true in all aspects of your life?
She didn't want to know the answer.
Hermione Granger was demolished. It was a fact now. Isn't it tragic?
But one mustn't dwell on such things. Yes, she was a failure in not only love, but responsibility. Yes, she would have very much liked to cry that moment, but she didn't. If she was going to get her life back in order (which she decided she wanted) then she was going to have to weed out the clutter and unnecessary things that were blocking the way to her reaching the top. She had to get rid of what was holding her back.
You know who to start with.
Hermione smacked herself in the head for her thoughts having a mind of their own. She desperately wanted to keep a hold of the so called "clutter" in her life, but being the sensible person she was, she resolved to refuse the misleading thoughts that circled in her head, reject the feeling in her gut, and go against her heart telling her that he was what she needed. Hermione longed to follow her heart; she longed life to be how it was in muggle movies and just wanted to be swept off her feet. It was never going to happen. She had to constantly remind herself that this was real life and things such as nice and good-looking guys didn't exist.
It was time to face the facts—real life sucked.
Sometimes you wake up and feel flat out fucked, and you would do anything to get the good feeling back.
This was one of these days.
Draco Malfoy groaned as he awoke, cursing the fact that he was alive, for what was there to live for now that he had loved (was it love?) and lost.
He sat straight up at this thought and smacked himself in the head.
What the hell was his problem? He was Draco-fucking-Malfoy! He owned this school and everyone in it. Or at least he should have. He had gotten along simply wonderful when he was using girls for cheap sex, and he would do just fine again.
But can you really go back to how you were? Can you really use people, knowing what it means to be loved, knowing what it means to open up to someone and feel something real?
Of course he must try. Of course things must go back to how they used to be.
A flash of green lit up his mind.
No. Not like before. It will never be like before.
Then, a familiar face flashed before his mind.
Yes, he shall pursue the girl from the balls. He hadn't given her much thought since the last ball, which felt like ages ago. There must have been another coming up soon.
As Draco allowed his mind to linger around the mysterious girl from the ball, another face clouded his mind and he thought it rather odd that he would think of her at a moment like this.
Yes, he had royally fucked things up with Hermione, but deep down, for some unexplainable reason, he couldn't help feeling that she was the one he wanted, not anyone else. She knew the exact way to press his buttons and make him want to strangle her in anger, but when he thought about how her smile made his weak in the knees or how softly she kissed, he knew that he wanted her.
But you've always only wanted the things you couldn't have. This is the same thing. You only want her because you know she won't have you.
Was it true? Draco paced around his room, contemplating recent events and the thoughts that swirled into his head.
Was it true?
And even if it wasn't, why should Draco Malfoy, of all people have to work so hard for something he wanted? Everything in his life had been handed to him on a silver platter; why should now be any different? Why should he have to work hard for what he wanted?
Because it's the only thing that makes it worth having.
Her words echoed in his mind.
Author's Note: I know, I know, it's been forever. I'm just working a lot at my job and haven't had any time to write. I know, no excuses. I'm dreadfully sorry. What matters now is that I've finally updated. This chapter is short, but I like it a lot and I think it's pretty good. Anyway, next I'm working on Feed on Fear and Two Twisted Teens, so at least FOF will be up next week, I promise. I have a 4 day weekend this weekend so I'm typing up the next chapter for FOF, and I just got to give it to my favorite person in the world (Besides reviewers, of course) to edit and then I'll post it, I promise. It won't take me this long again. Punishes self
Anyway, I think thank you's are in order!
Thanks a million to:
ThisScarlettePhoenix--Thanks! I don't know if I'd call my work amazing, but it gets me by. Thanks for reviewing and keep reading!
Dangerous Love--Thanks, hope I haven't disappointed you yet!
Zarroc--Thanks. Sorry about the long update, but I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
AmericanIdiot252--(By the way, I'm a fan of Green day, but only their old stuff. I don't like any of their new stuff. I think it stinks on ice.I'm more of a punk rock girl, myself. XD) Thanks, sorry for the long update!
perzndva--You know, I had this story all planned out at the beginning and now I feel like I've forgotten all about the things I planned to write. I'm just winging it now. But, I can gurantee another ball is coming soon... Thanks for reviewing!
RoonilWazlib09--Somehow my mind never really entertained the thought of Ron and Hermione. I'm basically in love with my Draco, and everyone loves Hermione, so I just thought they would be good. I've read a lot of Hr/D stories too that I really like. Also, it's so unlikely for them to be together, so I like the idea of them. Anyway, I'm glad you like it and hope I haven't let you down in any of my chapters. Thanks for reviewing and keep reading!
Anyway, thanks to all for reading and review! Let me know what you think!
xDreamerx
