In the Cards…
James woke up the next day feeling tired, like he hadn't slept. It made sense, though, as he hadn't slept. He'd spent most of the night lying on his bed staring up at the canopy above him, smiling. At first he had tried to talk to the others about the bliss he was feeling, but as the hours wore on, they became less receptive of his comments. When Sirius finally cracked and rose from his bed to stand threateningly over James and say "If you don't shut the bloody fuck up, I'm going to shove my wand through your tongue!" James finally got the message and kept his glee to himself.
He lay in peaceful agony, satisfied and yet craving more. He finally fell asleep when his brain simply shut off due to exhaustion. Upon waking, he realized, he was going to need to find a way to be excited about his relationship with Lily and still be able to sleep at night.
He climbed from his bed and stumbled in the general direction of the bathroom.
"Oy, Remus," he heard Sirius call as he shut the bathroom door, "Prongs is awake!"
When James emerged from the bathroom, after his shower, he felt much more awake. He surveyed the room and saw only Sirius present.
"A certain redhead came looking for you, mate," Sirius said smiling.
James smiled back at him, "Did she? Couldn't stay away from the Potter charm."
Sirius laughed, "Or maybe it was just her excuse to come see me."
"Yeah, okay," James grinned, throwing on a shirt. He sat on his bed to tie his shoes and watched as Sirius dived under his own bed, presumably looking for socks. He emerged victorious with two different colors in hand.
"They smell like they've only been worn twice!" He exclaimed happily, pulling the socks onto his feet.
"That's just wrong," James stated, standing from his bed and leaving the room.
He spotted his target the second his feet hit the common room. Lily was hunched over a pile of books at a table in the corner. He walked up to her from behind and tugged gently on her ponytail. "Morning, love," he said, as she turned towards him.
She smiled shyly, "Hi."
"What are you working on?" he asked sitting in the chair next to hers.
"The same thing you should be," she replied attempting to remain focused.
"Can I ask you a favor?" he said watching her work.
"Sure." Lily put down her quill all pretense of work forgotten.
"Can you help me catch up on all this work next week?" he asked.
Lily looked at him, confused. "Why next week?"
He smiled, "The first quidditch game of the season's this Saturday. Between practices and planning our first date, I don't know when I'm going to have time to fit schoolwork in."
"James, we can postpone our first date if it gets in the way of your studies," Lily responded.
"But you said we weren't going to be snogging again until after our first date, which means I have to make it very soon, indeed."
Lily grinned at him, "You won't have time to snog me this week, anyway."
"Oh no, love, I will always have time to snog you, you can count on that."
"Don't forget, that technically, I haven't said yes to that date, because I haven't seen that 'visual' you keep talking about."
He took her hand in his and kissed the top of it. "How about tonight then?"
She nodded, "And I'll help you, so hopefully, you won't have to make up anything next week."
"Thanks." James smiled, "I need food, and then I have practice. I gave the team yesterday off so they would focus well this week, and I'm going to push them hard today."
"What time will you be done?" Lily asked, her hands wandering through his hair.
"Whatever time you want me to be," he replied, leaning in.
"So we can do work?"
"Yeah, something like that." James' face smiled in front of hers and she couldn't help herself. She leaned in and kissed him. I'm kissing James Potter in the common room! How did this happen? But Lily ignored her inner dialogue and confusion of her recent actions. She knew this was fast, but when she was with James, and he smiled at her, she just didn't care. This whole thing was so crazy, but it felt so right.
"James! Breakfast!" Sirius called from the entrance to the room.
"Yeah, I'm coming," James yelled back, gazing at Lily. "See you later?"
She nodded and smiled, watching him leave the room, once again pushing away her reservations about the speed of their relationship.
Lily finished her work a while later and spotted Remus leaving the common room.
"Oy! Remus!" she called after him. He turned looking for the source of his name and smiled when he saw Lily.
"I'm going for walk," he stated, "Care to join me?"
She nodded, "That would be lovely."
Lily decided she had to make sure James was being real with her. If this were for real, then the speed of it wouldn't bother her. It would mean they just clicked. But if she was being played, she needed to talk to someone close to James, and someone mentally stable, which ruled out Sirius.
They left the room together and made their way down past the Great Hall and out the doors, on to the Hogwarts ground.
It was by no means a nice day. The sky was overcast and the wind was blowing at odd angles, whipping Lily's hair about her face. There was something in the sharpness of the wind, and the cold blasts of it, that gave Lily an ominous feeling. What could possess Remus to want to take a walk in this weather.
As if he were reading her mind, Remus said, "It's good thinking weather. Walking and thinking, I mean.'
Lily laughed, but the laughed seemed out of place with the scene and Remus' mood, "Yeah, if you like this kind of thing I suppose."
They headed around the castle, staying relatively close to the wall. Lily's mind was working in overdrive, thoughts running through her head. It had only been a month! She barely knew James. Well, what she knew of him before this was that he was a prat, but she didn't really know him. Why was she falling for him? What made her see him differently? This really was good thinking weather, she mused.
"Remus, may I ask you something," she said as they passed another tower.
"Sure," he said glancing down at her, before looking forward again.
"It's about James," she started, but he stopped her.
"Then you're asking the wrong person."
Lily ignored him, "Remus, I need to know certain things that James can't tell me, so I know what areas to tread lightly on. You saw what happened when I mentioned his parents, I mean, how am I supposed to stop that from happening again?"
"Don't mention his parents."
She glared at him and stopped walking, "His parents are the whole reason behind our relationship, I want to know why."
Remus sighed, "The whole reason behind your relationship, is that James changed." Lily looked up at him, and followed his gaze. They were standing a ways from the quidditch pitch, but James could be seen due to his unique style of broom riding. He was fearless in the air. Lily watched as he turned and dipped and sped through the sky.
"Why? I mean, what happened?" she wondered out loud.
"Now that does have to due with his parents," Remus stated beginning to walk again.
Lily was surprised, as she had been expecting no answer from the solemn boy, "What is it? What do you know?"
"It's really not my place to say, Lily," he began.
"But you're going to anyway?"
"Yes," he sighed, "I guess you should know. I'm not going to tell you the details, but last year James and Sirius were accused of, of well, a prank gone wrong."
Lily watched, as Remus closed his eyes slightly, as if the memory were still too painful.
"As it turned out, James wasn't the one to blame, it was mostly Sirius' fault, and he explained it to everyone."
Lily's eyes drifted back up to James as she listened to Remus.
"But, no one believed him. They thought Sirius was covering for him for the sake of quidditch or something trivial like that. Anyway, Dumbledore went slightly easier on James then Sirius, but James parents were the opposite. They refused to believe James had nothing to do with it. James was very close with his father, and for him not to be believed, not to be trusted, well, it was a shock. I mean, it was all a shock to James. The first time he couldn't talk himself out of something. The first time he was innocent. It opened his eyes, life wasn't fair. He and his father got into a huge row. People yelling stupid things, 'You don't do work at school because you're too busy with you're immature little tricks, you need to grow up!' 'You were never home to teach me to grow up!' You know, bad things like that."
He paused and Lily glanced back at him, her head swimming with new thoughts. "What happened?" she asked.
Remus shook his head, "They spent the summer in silence, James was grounded. When he came back to school he had grown up, well not entirely of course, but the part of him that thought his life was perfect, better than the rest, was gone."
The wind beat through Lily's cloak and stung her eyes. "What was the thing that he didn't do?"
Remus smiled slightly at her, "You're asking the wrong person."
A/N- Questions answered for you all at least, even if Lily is still in the dark… I hope I made all your reservations less reserved, if that makes any sense.