Please, don't hate me.

Disclaimer: I do not own DGM.

I heard the familiar metallic 'whoosh' of a sword being drawn and looked up to see Kanda, his eyes glinted dangerously, his face wreathed in darkness. Everyone stopped to look at him as he lifted his sword high in the air. The sword shining in the darkness looked as if it was suspended in midair, until it came crashing down right next to my knee. Then, just as if he had done nothing, Kanda sheathed his sword and walked away. The spectators' eyes were on Kanda as he brushed past Leverrier. As such, they did not hear the creak my cage made when I nudged it experimentally, nor did they notice when I slowly crawled out from my cage. As I edged away from the crowd, a man with a stick shouted, "He's escaping!" I sprinted at him crushing my palm into his face; hearing a crack I smiled. I ran searching for a space in the canvas, seeing a sliver of light I rushed towards it. I tumbled through and scrambled to my feet, running as fast as I could.

They must be coming for me, they are going to put me back in my cage and lock me up forever. Every shadow I saw could be the boy with my hair, or the man with the bloody stick. Panic rose in my chest and my lungs were burning. The sounds of my breathing and my foot steps echoing through the night air made me want to scream. The tents around me started to blur, and my feet slowed until I fell upon my knees. Breathing harshly, and almost choking on the night, I looked up. I was kneeling in front of Kanda's tent, almost as if in prayer. And O how this place looked like my salvation.

As I lay in the pallet, my body shook uncontrollably; I heard Kanda come in. He said nothing. His actions frustrated me and I wanted to wring the truth from him. Without thinking I shot up, and pointed my finger at him, ready to cast my judgement.

"Why?" Such an idiotic word, so easy to deflect.

Kanda merely looked at me in response.

His silent treatment was slowly driving me to hysteria and I screamed, my voice cracking, "Why?"

He looked alarmed and that satisfied me, almost made me lose all desire to hear his voice, but then, he opened his mouth, and my stomach flipped gleefully. His stare pierced me. "Stop screaming."

I wrung my hands together, trying to will the shaking away; as if that would stop my screaming. I spoke softly, conceding to his command, "Why?"

Kanda's face became contorted in anger. He looked disgusted, as if he could not look at me anymore, and he walked away.

But, I was not finished. I would have my answer from him, all the answers he has withheld from me. I followed him, tracing his footsteps and constantly bombarding him with my presence. He was angry; no furious; maybe even, homicidal. He could not banish me though; I was a demon after all, that's what people said I was, so I would become one. Their words transformed me. I would be the demon who rapes their fair daughters by my mere, horrific, presence. I was not meant to give others hope, even if it is a false hope. I cannot be the stoic clown; smile permanently sewn into place. I will live in the darkness, only coming out to show humanity their most despicable qualities. As I followed Kanda, I wanted him to reveal his true self to me, and I knew it would be more monstrous than mine. That thought alone made me giddy with delight.

As I continued to doggedly pursue Kanda, his pace kept increasing. Either his anger or terror was building to dangerous levels, but his desire to eradicate my presence was exceptionally clear. My abused body was starting to grow tired, yet the shaking had ceased to stop, leaving me, strangely enough, restlessly exhausted. But, I could not leave. Going back to the tent would most likely result in a fate worse than death, therefore I followed Kanda, even though my fiery passion for the truth had waned. He was heading towards the forest; my stomach lurched in terror. If the forest made me feel uneasy in the day, I would feel absolutely terrified at night. Yet, camp held nothing for me; Lenalee and Lavi might be waiting for me, but they were nothing but empty promises. Leverrier would either beat me to death in a public display, or maim me and stick me in a cage. I had a sudden urge to run away, to escape from this silly little island, but I immediately quashed the desire. If I did that, how would I make those who made me suffer, scream in terror? I realized that I would be able to exact my revenge purely because I did not care for myself. Why would I wish happiness upon myself? Mana is dead, and it would have been for the best if I had died with him. If I can make evil suffer before I die, then I have found my path, my purpose to live. As I came to this conclusion, I was already deep within the forest. There was nothing but darkness, and the eery hum of insects. Kanda's footsteps stopped, and I stood still. Somewhere along the trip my body had stopped shaking, and there was nothing to stop the weariness from washing over my body; trying to persuade me to sleep. I swayed, the black forest merged with my half closed eyes. As such, I barely noticed when Kanda moved, slowly closing the distance between us. His steady breathing just a few feet in front of me threatened to lull me into a deep sleep. Just as I was ready to embrace oblivion, I remembered my purpose. "Why?" I whispered, so softly it sounded like the humming of bugs. Kanda put his hand on my shoulder, it was difficult to see him, he spoke softly, he said