A/N: TPOV
A/N #2: Sorry, I almost missed uploading this chapter! This is the correct chapter 10; there shouldn't be two SPOV's in a row here!
Nymphadora. Her name, accented by Severus' voice ran through Tonks' mind on and off through the rest of the night. She was on rotation to patrol Hogsmeade the next night and wouldn't be back to patrol Hogwarts for two days. As she made her way out of the castle and to the forest to disapparate back to her room for some much needed sleep she was reminded that Remus would need to visit the castle and Snape soon; the moon was only a few days away from full. Before turning in she sent an owl to Remus to see when he would be visiting.
When Tonks awoke in the next day she went to her window, expecting to see her owl with a response from Remus. Instead, all she found was a steady drizzle falling from a grey blanket of clouds. Knowing Remus had been spying on and off as a member of Greyback's pack, she began to wonder if he would be transforming with the pack this moon rather than picking up wolfsbane potion from Snape. Maybe he won't be coming after all. Tonks gasped at the sharp bitterness that washed through her at the thought, shaking her head trying to clear it before the thought threatened to become more than it was.
Tonks threw on her cloak and cast Impervius to fight against the damp day and made her way out to the streets of Hogsmeade and eventually Knockturn Alley, keeping her senses open for any signs of suspicious activity. Slipping into Knockturn Alley, Tonks was met with one of the challenges of being an auror, having to distinguish between items that had the potential for being used in the Dark Arts and items that could only be used in the Dark Arts. Those that had the potential were, at this point, still legal to be sold thanks to their other uses. However, the later items were illegal and would need to be confiscated and the shop owner, at the very least, fined. As Tonks entered Borgin and Burkes she sighed. Is it really too hard to organize everything!? She looked around at the items stacked on top of each other, some items containing others, and knew this was going to be a long night.
Shuffling into her room, shrugging off her cloak, Tonks carried a cup of hot tea looking forward to calling it a night. Working through Borgin and Burkes had taken far too long and far too much energy. After all of that she had only found two items that were illegal and two others that were questionable. She had sent all four into the auror's office for further follow-up and was certain there were still things in that shop she had missed. It didn't help that the entire store seemed to radiate darkness. A rapid tapping drew her attention to the window. Her heart leapt as she saw the owl she sent to Remus holding a letter. She rushed over and let it in, giving it a piece of the shortbread that had come with her tea as a token of thanks. She quickly undid the tie around the letter, moving so fast that the letter rolled back up twice before she could hold it stable enough to read it.
Tonks,
How can you know what I am and still be interested in me? I have spent the last month and a half with others of my kind, under the leadership of the child-eater, Greyback, who changed me. I have seen things people should never see and have had to participate. They have once again taken to going after Voldemort's enemies' children. Children, Tonks! To make it worse, I can't deny that there is a part of me, the part I insist on keeping you safe from, that enjoys it. That part enjoys the hunt, the smell of blood and fear, regardless of what the prey is, WHO the prey is.
Although I will never let that part of me become all of who I am, if anyone is around me long enough they will one day be in danger of that side of me. It has happened before and can happen again. I have so far been lucky that someone has always been there to save those I put in danger. I would be foolish to believe that that will always be the case. I can't put anyone in that position, especially you. Please stop asking me to.
-Remus Lupin
The joy Tonks had felt at the sight of the letter quickly plummeted leaving a pit in her stomach. She read through the relatively short letter three times, each time hoping she had misread, misunderstood. On her fourth time through she was surprised to see the words blurring only to realize the reason as her tears fell, smudging the ink on the now shaking letter held in her hands. Snarling she crumpled up the letter and threw it into a corner of the room. Spinning around she stopped abruptly when confronted with her reflection in the mirror. Normally pink hair had turned a light brown hair; normally dark and twinkling eyes were red and puffy. She tried to concentrate enough to change her hair back and was met with a morose wall mentally blocking her from changing.
By the next day she still had not been able to overcome her inner struggle and successfully change. The more frustrated she became the further off success seemed. She threw on a pair of brown pants and a grey top, trying to make the brown hair and the uncharacteristic lack of color look intentional. Looking in the mirror she sighed as she remembered changing her face to make herself smile just two days ago. Sticking her tongue out at her reflection, she apparated to the perimeter of Hogwarts grounds.
Appearing just as her fellow auror arrived at the forest she conducted the nessisary turn-over, trying to smile at his stories of the events that had taken place during the day. Noticing her disinterest in conversation, her colleague dismissed himself and disapperated. Hearing the crack, Tonks relaxed a bit, no longer having to keep up the polite face. Sighing she looked up, her breath catching when she noticed that the moon was nearly full. Shaking her head she moved toward the castle to complete her rounds, hoping tonight wouldn't be as long as the previous.