Mello's POV
I've heard the phrase "Its lonely at the top", and that might be true, but that opens up a shit-ton of other metaphorical meanings. Like the idea that the proverbial top is lonely suggests a pyramidical shape in which each layer supports a smaller higher layer. And, like a mountain, pyramid, upside-down ice cream cone, or any other big-at-the-base small-at-the-tip proverbial fodder, it's precarious at the top. Which is why instead of unleashing a magnificent display of misdirected fury on my unsuspecting team, I was forced to pout in silence so as not to stir up new trouble with Matty. So I sat on my couch and sprawled out in my thinking position and tried to look productive while the pile of chocolate wrappers beside me grew and grew.
"Mello, are-" Donsen began. He thought like an explosives user, always blurting out the first thing that came to mind. I wholeheartedly approved when the much more subtle Nevelli interrupted him.
"The boss is planning something. Let him think." Donsen may have gone on, but the look I sent him was…discouraging. I knew I looked a little unhinged with that look. Good. Let them believe I ran naked through the streets at night, eating children's hearts. Peering at my face, Donsen nodded and leaned back. Ah, yes, I was supposed to be planning something. In any other place, I would declare this day a loss and go brood in my room, but that bastard had cameras everywhere, and now he could see, so of course, I had to at least look like I was occupying my mind for the appropriate number of hours.
My serious face intensified, as though I had reached some conclusion, and I settled for looking brilliant while inside, I repeated the words bored bored bored two hundred times. Then chocolate. Then Mattyisanass, which I only got to 43 on before I felt guilty, because he really wasn't trying to be one. Lazily, I stretched out one leg and then unwrapped another chocolate bar, deliberately separating the movements so I could kill time. I peeled off the paper. Then the foil. I observed the newly exposed chocolate. Lick. The careful positioning of teeth. Snap. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Dammit, I was back at the beginning. This time, I mentally recited all the curse words I knew. Practice makes perfect. Even that ended too quickly. Hmmm. I considered looking to other cultures to expand my repertoire. Fucking this and bastard that, it was positively redundant. Other students had sometimes used "bloody," and I reconsidered it, but it still didn't quite fit…in any other country, bloody was a quaint term at best, an irreverent uttering at worst. I needed universal terms, for perfect clarity when I needed to convey disappointment to the members of the masses I would someday rule, since my empire would undoubtedly span several cultures and languages. I started mentally designing the outfit I would wear as Mello: The Great and Terrible Ruler of All, but stopped myself quickly. I wasn't a Disney villain; I would strike fear into hearts by my mere presence, not with anything so tacky as a cape. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Ugh. I started singing songs in my head.
I've got a luvuhly bunch of coconuts, dah duh dah duh, there they are all standing in a roooow…
The door opened. It was Near. Of course.
"Are you busy?" I didn't look up, and made a show of looking as relaxed and unoccupied as possible.
"Extremely. Go away."
"Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head?" I couldn't help myself. I stared. Fuck. The sheep had found out how to read minds, and now he was going through my thoughts like I went through chocolate. What didn't I want him to know? Fuuuck, now I was thinking all the things I didn't want him to see me thinking. I pictured a brick wall in my head and wrote GO AWAY NEAR on it. "Ah, did I guess correctly? You appeared too serene to be thinking and out of the songs you generally hum, the beat of that one matched the tapping of your pinkie."
Oh.
"Go away." I repeated, trying not to look too relieved, and apparently failing, since his answer was
"Do not worry, Mello, I cannot read your mind. I simply know you very well." Again, I cursed my over-expressive face as the corner of his mouth quirked downward and he asked, "Is that worse?" Leaving me no time to answer, he began walking out and called back over his shoulder, "When Mello is finished counting coconuts, he may join us upstairs. I have decided to adapt Mello's kidnapping scheme such that your entire team does not put their lives at risk."
When the door closed, I turned to see Matt with his arms crossed and a furious expression.
"Were you just humming in your head that entire time?" I couldn't help but laugh at him.
"Jesus, Matt, if I wanted a wife, I woulda picked someone who could cook for shit."
"Dammit, Mell, we came all the way out here so you could fuss about beating Near and you're too busy making goo-goo eyes to even try!"
"I was not making goo-goo eyes."
"Right. Well, are we going upstairs, or would you like to wallow in your stupid pride some more?"
"Fine, we'll go talk to the sheep."
"So you admit you're wallowing?"
"…"
"Please understand," Near began, "that I remain wary of this method because it permits Mello an excessive level of proximity to our suspects. I have purchased this," he held up a taser, "and if you deviate from the plan, I will not hesitate to shoot you. If you show any signs of being under Kira's control, I will not hesitate to shoot you. If you attempt to run away and execute your own plan, I-"
"-Will not hesitate to shoot me. Yeah, I got it. So what is this brilliant plan of yours?"
"We kidnap Takada, forcing Yagami into action."
"…"
"Mello?"
"…"
"Matt, why does Mello not speak?"
"I think he's upset because-"
"THAT WAS OUR FUCKING PLAN IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
"Thank you, Matt. I withdraw my question; he has spoken."
"WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU GET OFF ACTING LIKE YOU HAVE SOME KICKASS PLAN WHEN IT'S THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING WE THOUGHT OF? YOU DIDN'T USE DIFFERENT WORDS TO MAKE IT SOUND SMART, IT'S THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING!"
"Ah, so Mello has noticed…" I gritted my teeth and tried to force out a coherent sentence between the almost painful urge to wrap my hands around his pasty undersized neck.
"…yes…I….noticed…"
"Mello is incorrect!" He declared, with barely disguised glee. He smirked. My fingers twitched. I didn't have to kill him, I could just change that smug expression to panic, and then I'd let go. "The plan is not the same because the situation has changed. Please direct your attention to the screen." Everyone else directed their attention to the screen. I re-recited my curse words, this time finding new ways to arrange them and specify Near as their target. "The highlighted times are situations in which Kira acted on information it would have been impossible for either Yagami or Takada to access." I flicked my eyes to the screen.
"So there's a third Kira. This is good. S'not new information, though. Why didn't you figure this out before?" I knew why. He knew I knew why. Victory is my primary source of warm fuzzies. I grinned. He sniffed nonchalantly and turned back.
"I merely needed to revisit the information. It is fortunate we are not all as hasty as Mello." Warm fuzzies gone.
"Near, you are blind…" he stiffened, "…to the obvious. I didn't expect this from you." I smiled sweetly. "So how does this change anything?"
"It has become imperative that we catch the third Kira. Capturing Takada and isolating Yagami simultaneously would force one of them to reveal the identity of Kira number 3."
"So now my life is worth risking?"
"This is why I shared my new information with you. I require Matt to set up appropriate surveillance and Mello and I will remain near enough to Yagami for any necessary action that needs to be taken. We will, of course, go with a team. Yours seems suited for this type of mission."
"You want my team?"
"I will pay if we are successful. If not, I suspect we will all die anyways. Do not feel obligated to agree. I suspect I could assemble an equally qualified team in a week."
"Fine. But you gotta let me set things up." Even if Near got the credit, it would go to L, and that was alright. What mattered was for him to know that I had put together everything that led to Kira's capture. It was my plan in the first fucking place anyways.
"That does seem most efficient. You are most used to handling your team." Matt rolled his eyes.
"If you're done playing stupid mind games with each other, we really do need to get going on the whole catching a mass murderer thing?"
"Of course." He flicked his hand to dismiss us, and I almost commented on the gesture, but Matty was getting the narrow-eyed look again, and I couldn't push him so soon after a fight.
On the way back, Matt said over his shoulder,
"You two need some couples counseling." I gaped.
"We're not a couple!"
"mmm." I wanted more agreement than that noncommittal noise, but we were back in our room by then and I needed to brief the team.
"We're going on a mission."
"Eccellente! It has been, how do you say? Troppo a lungo…" Nevelli was already cleaning her guns.
"This one is different. If it goes wrong, we could all die."
"That is not so different then, eh? If it goes good, we still get the money, si?"
"Yeah."
"Is same…Andiamo!" Jensen, a man of few words, surprised us all with a quick nod, and a rare display of trust in his slow, deep voice.
"I agree. We have not been led wrong yet." I considered mentioning how I couldn't be perfect because even if I hadn't led him wrong, our combat guy before him hadn't ended well. Or the one before him. But now wasn't really the time to bring people down, so I just told them the plan. And it really was just as simple as it sounded. Stupid sheep.
"N, I presume?"
"Of course. You still claim you are helping capture Kira?"
"I am doing my best."
"Excellent. Then you will not mind assisting us in a brief mission?"
"Mission doing what?"
"I thought you wanted to help?"
"…of course. Yes, of course I will do anything I can."
"Excellent. We will send you an address. Be there within an hour of receiving it."
"I-" I reached over and hung up on him.
"Near, you set up the rooms?"
"Of course."
"Then let's go."
Our trap was set in a small hotel that we had rented out and gutted. Only two rooms and the lobby were still functional, and they had been systematically relieved of any dangerous objects. Next to each of these rooms was a tech room. Matt monitored the smaller of the two rooms with Nevelli and Jensen, and Donello posed as the clerk, since explosives would be near useless in such close quarters. Near worked the larger of the two tech rooms, and I was his sole bodyguard…because I was handcuffed to him. We were attached by a six foot plastic chain which he had cheerfully explained would "not pass the shock on to me if the need arises to tase Mello." Cute, right? Pulling at my wrist, I dragged Near to find Matt.
"Do it now."
"I suppose I'll just email him, shall I?" Matt and I both smirked.
"Crash every server connected to him, and give him a virus he'll never be able to coerce into doing anything but repeating the address of this place." Matt typed for about thirty seconds before saying,
"Done!"
"That was even fast for you, Matty."
"Had a feeling you'd say something like that."
"I'm going back with the sheep to wait."
"I'll be watching over you." Matt said with fake solemnity.
"My guardian angel." I fluttered my eyelashes and clasped my hands together. On my way out, I blew Nevelli and Jensen each kisses, watching Nevelli pretend to catch it, and Jensen shiver as though bisexuality was something that may rub off on him. Near yanked me off balance in his rush to get out of the room.
"Do you have to be so uptight? Enjoy the adrenaline. We're on a mission. We're on a hunt."
"Mello may be hunting. I am performing a highly illegal citizen's arrest."
"You're too civilized for your own good."
"You have no restraint."
"You should try it some time!" I finished on an almost singsongy note and grinned at the dirty wall. I felt giddy with the thrill of being on another mission. We might die today. This is how it was supposed to be. Not the dying part, but the way each breath was seized and conquered by my lungs with the possibility it may be my last.