I'm not even going to discuss Wendy's funeral. I was in tears through most of it- actually, probably all of it. Kelly broke down so horribly that they actually had to usher her inside, and at the end they sent her to St. Mungo's for a Calming Draught. I knew, though, that that would barely be a temporary relief for her: Wendy was her closest friend, so her death would leave Kelly permanently scarred, never to be the same again.

The whole ordeal was devastating.

Nonetheless, it didn't change the fact that I was going to be graduating soon. I had to use all of my willpower to shove the thoughts of our loss into the back of my head so I could concentrate in class. When the day was over, though, and we were free to think about something besides work and studying, the bitter truth came flying back like a bullet, paralyzing me with agony.

Besides schoolwork, there was only one way of escape, and that was through Leon. He somehow knew just what to say that would make me feel at peace despite everything. Learning French was work, yes, but since I knew it wasn't a necessity it was actually kind of soothing. Besides: deciding I had too much on my hands already, Leon was now stopping lessons early and used the remaining time to work his French charm and hilariously pathetic sense of humor. Plus, I had convinced Dad over Spring Break to send him some blood samples, so the bloodlusts around me were decreasing drastically. Still, no matter how much I loved his company, it was creating a whole new issue. Being with Leon was like a drug: it felt indescribably brilliant for a while, but in the long run it was just harmful.

It came to the point that I actually found myself counting off my problems on my fingers: Wendy was dead, graduation was coming up quick yet I had no certain plans for the future, my grades were gradually becoming shaky, and I felt unconditional love for my Transfiguration professor with nobody to confide in.

As the last day of school grew closer, I began planning on talking to someone about it whenever I wasn't studying for final exams. Dad… There was no chance in that. I'm his little girl, and he demanded since I was little that if I ever do find love, it must be with a man my age or younger. Mum would understand, she's always so supportive, but I'm fairly positive all of my relatives would be overprotective of me. So that left me with my friends to consult.

Kelly… That was absolutely hopeless. She was absolutely hopeless, the poor girl. I've never seen anyone so consumed by grief in my life, not even on television. We all feared they'd drag her off to St. Mungo's permanently any day now. I could talk to Jenna about anything, anything, and she'd understand… Anything except boys, that is. You see, when Jenna was 13, she was taking an innocent stroll through her neighborhood when two guys that looked to be in their 20's cornered and jumped her. Long story short, they ended up cruelly raping. Ever since, Jenna has never walked anywhere alone, has started shaking around males (the only men she'd talk to were professors, yet she was still nervous around them), and would rather jump off the Astronomy Tower than have a boyfriend. When any of us spoke about romance, she shut down and looked remarkably uncomfortable.

So she was out of the question.

That left one person: Cecilia. I briefly wondered if I should just keep the situation to myself, but quickly shot that down: if the fact of my love life remained untold, it would eat me alive. Consequently, I approached Cecilia toward the beginning of June.

My friend was alone in our common room, sitting cross-legged in an armchair and staring out the window at the mountains. I understood why she was so in the clouds: that morning, Kelly's parents had taken her home early. Apparently she was no longer mentally safe, and needed special care. It's nearly impossible to imagine that just a few years ago, Kelly's biggest concern was that she her favorite beauty products were getting more expensive. What a crying shame… And I swear to God that wasn't sarcastic.

"Hey, Cilia… I gotta talk to you about something…" I murmured, hesitantly sitting beside her. She glanced at me, silently acknowledging my presence. I took a deep breath. This was it. "So… There's this guy. I really like him- oh, what's the point of saying that, I love him- and he feels the same. He tells me constantly. Although, see, we probably shouldn't be together, so our romance is a secret… But the discreetness is gnawing away at me, s-so I gotta tell someone…" My heartbeat started increasing and I gulped silently, closing my eyes then gradually reopening them. "Cecilia… I'm dating Le- Professor Dimanche is my boyfriend."

Silence. Horrible, horrible silence. Cecilia was now staring full at me, her brown eyes widening more than I knew they were capable of. "What?" she hissed after at least 10 seconds. Well, at least she wasn't yelling…

"Professor Dimanche is my-"

"I heard you, you idiot." Shock caused my words to get trapped in my throat. Idiot… She called me an idiot… Okay, this was worse than yelling. Gradual fury began building up in Cecilia's tan face. "One of your best friends is dead… and your biggest concern is having a romantic relationship with our TEACHER!"

Youch, that one stung. "What, no! I-it's not my biggest concern, you know W-Wendy's death left an awful blow… I just, thought I'd clear up one problem…"

"Alexandra," oh Lord, she used my long name, "revealing your dirty little secret doesn't clear up how DISGUSTING this is. That's illegal, and twisted, and nasty-"

"The age doesn't matter! Besides: Yes, he's my teacher and I'm his student, but I'll be graduating soon…" I interrupted. That right there was a big mistake.

"But you aren't graduated yet. How long has this been going on? You two are sick, you know that? Absolutely sick," Cecilia growled.

"Why, because we fell in love!" I retorted, my tone increasing as much as hers.

"Oh shut UP! He's, like, a pedophile- 6 year difference my arse, you're still a teen- and YOU… I'm a Ravenclaw too y'know, I'm smart enough to know the revolting game you're playing. You're putting on this whole lovey-dovey act just so that pervert will give you a good grade… You're such a manipulative little whore!" Cecilia snarled. I'd never felt so utterly aggravated and offended in my entire life. But Cecilia wasn't done yet. "How far have you two gone? You've been in his bed before, haven't you?"

I stood up to my full height, no matter how slight it was. "Cecilia Maria Santana Martinez, don't you DARE!" I shouted. I have to admit: I envy how bitterly calm Cecilia managed to remain.

"It's true, isn't it?"

"Of course it isn't! We've kissed, that's IT!" I insisted furiously. Cecilia narrowed her eyes, her arms now crossed.

"Considering where he's from, I assume you've French kissed. That bastard used his tongue on you, huh?"

"DO NOT CALL LEON A BASTARD!" I bellowed. Before I was aware of myself, I had my wand drawn. Cecilia shot to her feet, whipping out her own; however, we simply glared at each other. No matter how upset we were, I was positive that we would never cause one another harm. Well, physical harm.

After an intense, headache-inducing stare down that lasted who knows how long, I let out a wordless cry and stomped off to our dorm. Cecilia wouldn't, I knew, come up until I was asleep, if she came up at all. Maybe she'd go to sleep in the common room. I threw myself onto my bed, burying my face in my pillow which caused Butterscotch, whom I'd nearly landed on, to let out a frightened squeak, bolt onto the floor, and disappear under my four poster. It didn't bother me, though. Nothing could bother me, except that Cecilia was absolutely appalled and incredulous at my feelings for Leon. What if everyone else would react the same way? Would nobody understand that our love is pure?

I ended up going in depth with this thought. In the event that everyone truly was against my relationship with Leon, who would I listen to? Surely my family and friends… If Leon and I eventually broke up, and I had chosen him over all my other loved ones, then I would be absolutely alone. Not to mention I didn't want to be that Mary Sue type of girl that naively picks a man above all else…

Did that mean, though, that I should give up on our love? Staying together would lead to either of two things: we would keep it all a surreptitious, making me feel untrustworthy and tainted; or we could let people be aware of our affection for each other with the chance of being shunned. So really, neither of them were appealing… Nevertheless, as I drifted into an uneasy sleep, I wished it was Leon's shoulder, not my pillow, I was silently crying into.