Disclaimer: I don't own blah blah blah, all rights belong to Bisco Hatori. She is the genius behind these awesome characters. I just like to see them fall in love with different people. Heehee ;)
A/N: You guys are truly the best. Thank you so much for the awesome reviews. It really does inspire me to continue writing. I love to hear that people can't wait for the next chapter. I really do appreciate it. Thank you for taking the time to let me know how you feel. Keep the reviews coming. Okay, here's chapter 10 hope you enjoy!
Hikaru leaned against the wall looking at the line of models getting ready to rehearse for the runway show. He recognized the one he had kissed and was glad to see she had decided to work for his mom once more even if he didn't really want to see her. Looking at her now he still wondered why he had returned her kiss. It had been soft and gentle just as Haruhi had seen. Why did he kiss her like that and why was it so impossible for him to kiss Haruhi that way?
Haruhi, just thinking about her hurt. He missed her so much. He missed holding her, talking to her, laughing with her, seeing her beautiful smile, and her warm brown eyes. His chest felt tight. He truly hated being with out her and doing so without being with Kaoru only made the feeling twice as bad. He missed them both, but where Kaoru was his brother and couldn't truly leave him, Haruhi could. How could he continue without her? What would he do if she wanted nothing more to do with him? He couldn't bear that thought. He took a deep breath and got back to work. At least he was too busy to dwell on it for long. It hurt too much. He wondered what Haruhi was doing? Did she miss him at all?
Haruhi woke up with Kaoru's arm draped loosely around her waist. Thank goodness he wasn't wrapped around her like he usually was since she needed to get up, use the bathroom, and take a shower. She slid out from under him as carefully as she could and made her way to the bathroom.
The warm water felt great as it washed over her. She bent down to grab the shampoo bottle and felt her insides ache. She gasped out loud as the shower woke her up and she thought abut the reasons why she was achy.
"Oh. My. God. I slept with Kaoru," she said as she stared at the shower wall. "I really slept with Kaoru."
She began to shake slightly as she thought about everything that had happened in the middle of the night. It had started out as a simple request for a kiss. That had seemed harmless enough but his kiss was so gentle, so tender. Before she knew it she was burning for more and when Kaoru had asked for more she eagerly complied. Why had she given herself to him so easily? Why had she given herself to him after only one kiss? She had been kissing Hikaru for months and never felt such burning. "Oh, no, Hikaru," she whispered. If he found out he was going to kill the both of them.
That familiar pain, that terrible hurt returned as she remembered he cheated on her. She had nothing to feel guilty about. She had not betrayed him the way he betrayed her, but he wasn't going to see it that way. Of all the men she could have given herself to he would have preferred it to be any one other than his own twin. She knew that much.
She groaned as she leaned against the tile wall. Guilt and regret began to nibble at her conscious but it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be. Did she regret her night with Kaoru? Not really, she was surprised to discover. Who could regret what the two of them had shared. Kaoru had been so gentle, his touch so soft. Her body tingled as she remembered every sensation he had brought to her. Her heartbeat began to accelerate. What was that? She had never had those kinds of feelings for Kaoru before.
Sure, she loved him, and he was her best friend. She could tell him anything, she trusted him even more than she trusted Hikaru since he could never keep his big mouth shut when he knew something that would annoy the other hosts. She had a deeper bond with Kaoru than she had with his older brother as well, but love? She had never allowed herself to think that way about Kaoru and she had no idea he felt that way about her but she had seen it clearly in his eyes last night. The question was what were they going to do about it if anything?
She knew he didn't want to hurt Hikaru any more than she did, and this was going to hurt him in a massive way. She took a deep breath and continued with her shower hissing in pain as she moved certain ways. What was she getting so worked up for? This was Kaoru, they shared something wonderful and that was it, right? This would just stay between them no harm, no foul. Deciding that she was able to let go of the tension she felt somewhat normal by the time she went to the kitchen to fix breakfast.
Kaoru woke up and reached beside him for Haruhi. What he found was an empty space and cold sheets. He could smell the coffee and food invade his senses and he smiled. He stretched feeling more satisfied than he ever had in his life. He slept with Haruhi. He felt his morning friend twitch at that thought. She had been so soft, so warm. Being with her was so much more than he ever realized it would be. He considered himself a very creative person since he could design almost any article of clothing in no time flat, but even he had to admit his imagination fell way short on what being with Haruhi would truly be like. It had been heaven on earth.
He got out of bed and followed the tantalizing scent into the kitchen. And there she was moving around the counter like an expert. As someone who was raised with servants and cooks his whole life he never experienced simple home cooked meals made just for him until he had met Haruhi. She was so much more than a friend to him. She was home to him. Home to all of the former hosts really since none of them had a meal prepared by their mothers. Watching her move around the kitchen had a very domestic feel to it. It was almost as if they were married. His heart stopped beating at that thought. He never dreamed he would get as close to Haruhi as he was last night, so he never allowed himself to think about marriage, but Haruhi would make the perfect wife. He could not imagine a better woman for the role. He smiled and approached her as quietly as he could.
"Good Morning," he whispered as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck. He frowned as he felt her stiffen completely in his arms. He waited for her to relax as she realized it was him but she didn't.
"Good Morning," she said stiffly as she pulled from his embrace and continued to make breakfast.
"Haruhi," he said feeling his heart deflate in his chest.
"Yes," she said keeping her sole focus on the food in front of her.
"Haruhi, look at me," he whispered.
When she did he almost wished she hadn't. She looked at him warily and with a little…uncertainty?
"You do regret it," he said taking a seat at the table as she served the dishes she had made. He couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice.
She didn't say a word as she poured them coffee and took the seat across from him. He stared at her as she dished food onto each one of their plates.
"Haruhi?" he questioned as she began eating with out answering him.
"No, I told you last night I don't regret it and I still don't," she said her statement somehow hanging in the air unfinished.
"But," he prompted.
"But it wasn't our smartest move, Kaoru. We can never tell Hikaru what happened last night and you know how I feel about secrets."
"I wasn't planning on coming right out and telling him but I'm sure he'll figure it out on his own once he sees us together. I don't like secrets either so why do you care so much if he knows?"
"Because I don't have a death wish and I'd like to think you don't have one either," she said looking horrified by the thought of Hikaru finding out.
"I don't have a death wish, but I have nothing to feel bad about so I don't. I didn't go behind his back and take you from him. He gave you up. He let you go when he decided to kiss some other girl."
"He's not going to see it that way, Kaoru, and you know it. He is going to be hurt," she whispered.
"I know, but he has no one to blame but himself. I don't see why we can't give it a go now that the two of you are broken up."
She looked at him in shock. "Is that what you want?"
"Yes. Why do you look surprised? I told you how I felt about you last night."
"I know but surely you don't want to just start going out with me right after I broke up with your brother. I don't want to be one of those girls the two of you loathed in high school."
"What are you talking about? You're not anything like any of the girls we went to school with," he said looking total confused.
"But the two of you always hated the fact that the girls didn't care which one of you they went out with as long as it was one of you and now you want me to go out with you since I don't have Hikaru?"
"Is that what you're worried about?"
"That's what everyone will think if I started going out with you," she said flatly as she pushed her food around her plate.
"Are you worried I think that?" he asked frowning at her.
"The thought crossed my mind."
"Well you can let that thought go. I don't think that at all and I never cared about what anyone thought except for you and Hikaru. No one else matters. You are not trading one twin for the other without thought. You are nothing like those other girls. They couldn't tell us apart if their lives depended on it so they weren't going out with us for who we are they wanted to go out with us because we were a Hitachiin. You would never have slept with me if there weren't things about me that you love. Things that are different from the reasons you love Hikaru. I know that, Hikaru knows that. You could have slept with Hikaru if you wanted too but you didn't. Maybe there are things about me you love even more than you love about him since you gave yourself to me, I don't know. What I do know is that you did not sleep with me as a trade off for Hikaru."
He looked pissed and she didn't know what to say to make him feel better.
"I know I would never go out with one of you just because I couldn't have the other but it is going to look like it and I worried you might think it."
"Well, I don't and I already told you I don't care what anyone else thinks. The only thing that matters to me is how we feel about each other. I love you, Haruhi, I really do. Do you love me?" he whispered his question as though fearing her answer.
"I do love you, Kaoru, and I don't regret last night, I'm just not sure I'm ready to jump into a relationship so soon after breaking up with Hikaru. I can't just pretend my relationship with him meant nothing, and I can't pretend I'm not still hurt by what he did."
"I understand," he said trying to be patient. "But I did bring you here to try to help you with that pain, and I do want you to have fun with me. Can I ask you a favor?"
"You can ask me anything," she said without hesitation.
"Will you at least consider going out with me when you are ready for a relationship. I know you never gave much thought to feeling that way about me but could you try to explore your feelings for me and see if you could view me as more than a friend to you?"
"Okay, I will."
"Promise?"
"I promise," she said and smiled at him.
"All right, then eat up cause you are going to be burning some serious calories today. I made an appointment for you with a snowboard instructor and we need to be out there in less than two hours. After we eat I'm going to shower we are both going to change and hit the snow."
"Kaoru, I'm not very good at snowboarding. You know that."
"You're better at it than you were at skiing. That's why I asked for an instructor. I mean I could probably teach you how to ski, but I think it's best if an expert taught you more about snowboarding. Come on, it will be fun."
"You know I'm going to kill you if I go home in any kind of cast right?"
He started to laugh. "I know, that's why you have an instructor"
After washing the dishes Haruhi made her way up to her room wondering what she should wear that would keep her warm enough out on the slopes all day. She sighed as she seen a full outfit laid out on the bed right down to the boots. It looked like a professional snowboarding outfit. She shook her head. The money these two spent on clothes for her was something she didn't even want to add up in her head. If she factored in what their mother spent designing for her it would be double if not triple what she had originally owed the host club. She sighed and began getting dressed. She shook her head as she stared at the ridiculous scrap of lace Kaoru must consider underwear.
As soon as Kaoru was done getting dressed he went and looked for Haruhi. When he found her he forgot how to breath. The snowboard pants he had designed for her hung low on her tiny hips. She looked hot in their latest style of snowboard gear. She looked like a professional extreme athlete. He smiled gently as he looked at her. It was too bad she had zero athletic ability cause if she did have any talent for it she'd be the sport hottie. A surge of heat raced through him, but he swallowed it down as she turned toward him.
"Ready to go?" he asked wishing his voice had sounded a little steadier.
"Sure," she said.
Once on the slopes Kaoru went off to see about her instructor. She looked at all the other people out on this day enjoying the resort.
"Well, hello there pretty lady," a man said as he stopped in front of her. A very good looking man she had noticed when he came into full view.
"Hello," she said flatly not too taken by his looks since handsome men had surrounded her since she had started high school.
"You look amazing in your gear," he said then flushed after saying it. "I know that must sound like some cheesy pick up line but I work here and see the latest fashions all the time. I'm serious when I say you look great."
"Thanks," she said just as flatly as her greeting. She was unimpressed by pick up lines of any kind and never got all flustered by compliments. If anything they annoyed her. Who cared about how someone looked anyway? That told you nothing about them as a person.
"You know, I finish work about six and most of the young people hit the club around here. It's real trendy and has some great music. Would you be interested in going?"
Kaoru was told the instructor was a man named Hara Satoru and that he was waiting near the lodge entrance for them to arrive. Scanning for Haruhi Kaoru felt an uncharacteristic flash of jealousy jolt through him. Who was this good looking guy smiling like a lovesick fool. It was obvious he was trying to hit on her. As oblivious as Haruhi was she probably didn't even realize it. He was about to storm over to them when he stopped. Did he have the right to interfere if some other guy was putting the moves on her? She hadn't said she would go out with him so did he have a right to make a claim on her? Hell, yes he did, if only to check this guy out first and see what he was like.
He walked up to them and casually draped his arm around her waist. His hand rested gently on her hip. His heart began beating madly for two reasons, one would she shrug off his hand and embarrass him in front of this guy, and two he felt a shockwave of electricity fly threw him the moment his hand landed on her tiny hip. Visions of last night swam through his head but he tried to keep his mind clear.
"Hey, what's going on?" he asked proud that he kept any of the jealousy and anger he was feeling out of his voice. Yes, he felt those things, yes, he knew how Hikaru felt when other guys were near Haruhi, the difference was he could control himself his brother could not.
"Oh, hey, Kaoru, Ummm…" she stopped not sure she wanted to mention the invite to the club. Not that she wanted to keep it from him but she wasn't sure how she felt about going.
"I was just telling your girl here about this club the young crowd around here goes too. You two should come it's usually a real good time," he said disappointment clearly on his face as he eyed Kaoru's hand on her hip. Luckily she didn't shrug him off so he pulled her a little bit closer to him.
"What do you think? It could be fun," he said nuzzling into her face not bothering to correct the fact that she wasn't his girl. If Haruhi wasn't going to say anything he wasn't either.
"Whatever. I don't care either way so whatever you decide is fine," she said to avoid an argument.
Kaoru knew Haruhi would rather stick pins in her eyes than spend a night dancing in a club. He normally would avoid such a thing since she didn't like it, but he did bring her here to have a good time and it did sound like fun.
"Sounds fun," Kaoru said knowing Haruhi was probably cursing him out in her head right now.
"Great, we usually meet up there around eight. It's got some good people and some good music. You won't regret coming. I, umm…I hope I don't overstep my bounds, but your girl has some serious model potential you know," he said eyeing Kaoru nervously.
"What are you a modeling scout?"
"No, but I have just designed my own small line of sportswear. I'm telling you if your girl here wore my designs every man in Japan would take up snowboarding," he said sliding his gaze over her from head to toe.
"Until they actually saw me snowboarding then they would be running off the mountain, trust me," she said completely unembarrassed by her lack of athleticism.
The man laughed. "Trust me, it wouldn't matter. They wouldn't be looking at your skills."
Haruhi felt Kaoru stiffen beside her. She was a little insulted herself at his insinuation, but Kaoru opened his mouth before she could. Which was probably a good thing since she was so notoriously blunt.
"If my girl is going to model for anyone she is going to model for me," Kaoru said.
"For you?" the guy said trying to figure out if he was lying or not. "Are you starting your own line of clothing too?"
"Something like that," Kaoru said with his infamous smirk.
"So, are you just starting up, just thinking about it, or do you have something on the market?" the guy said a bit of a challenge in his voice.
"Some of my designs have been on the market."
"Oh? Under what name?" the guy asked. Haruhi had the distinct feeling he was trying to call Kaoru out on a lie. Boy, was he in for a rude awakening.
"Hitachiin. I'm Hitachiin Kaoru," Kaoru said putting his hand out for the man to shake.
"Hi-Hitachiin, as in the famous fashion designer, Hitachiin Yuzuha?" he said in awe.
"The one and the same. She's my mother. I've designed for her plenty of times. Most of the time she likes what she sees and puts it into one of her lines. I designed what Haruhi is wearing."
He looked her over once more seeing the small Hitachiin logo on the snowboarding pants she was wearing.
"Wait, Haruhi? Fujioka Haruhi?" he asked coming out of his awe over Kaoru's name.
Kaoru frowned as she did. How did this guy know her name?
"You're my next student. I'm Hara Satoru, your snowboard instructor," he said looking totally pleased with this revelation.
"Great," Kaoru said struggling to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.
"Well, let's get started. I'm embarrassed to say your time started five minutes ago. I apologize that I was busy talking."
"No problem," she said.
"Be careful," Kaoru said as he gave her a quick kiss. He wanted to really lay one on her in front of this guy, but he knew the limits Haruhi would endure. He wasn't sure she wouldn't push him off if he carried this too far. "We'll board together after your lesson."
"Okay," she said giving her one of her heart stopping smiles. He could feel Hara-San freeze at her smile too. Kaoru's smirk grew. Haruhi didn't give out that many genuine smiles. This one was all for him.
Kaoru tried to enjoy boarding, but he kept a close eye on Hara-San as he placed his hands on Haruhi's body to adjust her hips into the correct position. He narrowed his eyes not sure he believed she needed as much adjusting as this man was giving her or that he needed to linger there as long as he did, but he bit his lip and kept quiet about it. Haruhi would not be pleased if he caused a scene.
"Could we take a break, Hara-Sensei, I would like to stretch a bit before continuing if that's alright with you," she asked hoping to give her lower back a break for a few minutes.
"No problem, Fujioka-San, and you can call me Saturo if you'd like," he said encouraging her to use his first name.
"Oh, I couldn't do that," she said.
"Well, at least drop the Sensei," he said with a smile.
"I couldn't do that either, it would be disresepectful since you're my teacher."
"Well, I wouldn't mind."
She looked around for Kaoru and found him on one of the half pipe runs. She watched him get a lot of air as he launched himself from the pipe. He grabbed his board and did some kind of move she would never be able to name and landed gracefully back on the ground. She continued to watch him as he did one trick after another. He looked…sexy as an athlete. Her heart began to pound in her chest and her mouth went dry. Sexy? Where had that word come from? She had never thought of Kaoru as sexy before. She never even thought that about Hikaru and he had occupied her thoughts a lot longer through the years than Kaoru had. Her eyes never left his body and she had to admit sexy was the right word for how he looked. Her stomach tightened reminding her of the feelings he brought to her last night. Did she feel more for Kaoru than she was willing to admit?
"What do you think, Fujioka-San, are you ready to get back to it? We don't have that much time left," Hara-Sensei said.
"Huh?" she said pulling her eyes from the sight Kaoru made. "Oh, yeah, sure, I'm ready." She looked back once catching Kaoru's eye. He smiled at her and waved. She waved back feeling her cheeks flush at being caught staring.
After her lessons were over Kaoru came over to the more amateur part of the course and watched her show him what she learned. For someone who hated sports she really wasn't that bad at snow boarding. They spent hours at the resort and Haruhi found herself unable to remove the smile from her face. She and Hikaru didn't really go out on many dates. Probably because she was not one who enjoyed going out and running around somewhere, but she was glad Kaoru talked her into this trip. She was genuinely enjoying herself.
Because her mind was on other things she wasn't paying attention to where she was going and crashed right into Kaoru. She knocked him down and landed heavily on top of him. She glanced up to find him laughing. His laughter turned into a smile and she returned it. It wasn't his trademark smirk it was a true Kaoru smile. The one that reached his eyes and caused them to brighten.
Her stomach clenched again and her heartbeat sped up. What was this feeling? Why was she feeling this way over spending time with Kaoru? She never thought about Kaoru in this way and it was confusing her. Then it dawned on her. Ever since Hikaru had confessed his feelings she was always focused on him and how he felt so she never thought about Kaoru or how she felt about him. Was she attracted to Kaoru now that she allowed herself to think about him in such a way? Did she feel more than friendship for him? Was now the right time to be pondering all these things? She stared at him held captive by his amber eyes.
"What?" Kaoru said laughing at her.
"Uh-nothing," she said but found herself giving him a quick kiss on the lips before she realized what she was doing. Why the hell did I do that? She wondered not wanting to confuse him. This morning she told him she wasn't ready to think about a relationship and now she was kissing him. She moved to pull off of him when he grabbed her upper arms. He kissed her back gently, quickly. "Thanks," he whispered before releasing his hold on her.
The rest of the afternoon was spent pleasantly enough. They ate dinner at the lodge, and returned to their room for a quick shower before getting ready to head out to the club.
"Hey Kaoru, what do you think people wear to this club?" she asked as she sat beside him in a robe.
"Well this resort is frequented by people with money so I'm sure even the younger kids go all out."
"Oh," she said frowning. "Then what am I going to wear. I don't want to embarrass you."
He laughed. "You could never do that, but don't worry, I have your outfit all laid out for you. Go on and get dressed I can't wait to see it on you."
She didn't miss the devilish gleam in his eyes or the sinful smirk he was giving her. God, he was handsome. How had she never really noticed that before? How come he never made her heart race and now she couldn't control it every time she looked at him. And what was with the urge to want to kiss him all of a sudden?
Kaoru watched her leave the room. His heart was pounding under his rib cage. The way she had been looking at him all day was driving him mad. Was he just imagining it? Did he just wish her to look at him that way and so he was reading into something that wasn't there? No, he was sure that was not the case. She had never looked at him like that before. It gave him hope even as he was afraid to build it up only to be disappointed.
Haruhi dressed in the short silver dress Kaoru had laid out for her. It barley came to mid thigh and was subtly trimmed in midnight blue. Strappy silver heels were sitting on the floor and she wondered how she was going to walk let alone dance in those things. She wondered what Kaoru would think of how she looked. Kaoru, she had been having strange thoughts about him all day long.
She had always viewed him as her best friend, but if she were being honest with herself she had more in common with Kaoru then she did with Hikaru. She could tell him anything, she enjoyed his peaceful demeanor, he was hilarious when he wanted to be but he knew how to be serious, he was more mature than his brother, and much less selfish although he had a spoiled side as well. They enjoyed the same movies, they both enjoyed reading, and would rather do quieter activities than engage in some of the reckless, crazy ideas Hikaru came up with all the time. She stared at herself in the mirror. Kaoru was more perfect for her than Hikaru was, then any of the former hosts were really. How did she never see it before? The thought frightened her. What was she going to do about these feelings?
She was just putting silver clips in her hair to keep her bangs out of her face when Kaoru walked in once again without knocking. Warmth rushed through her at the sight of him. She felt her face heat up and knew she must be blushing like mad. Blushing for Kaoru.
Kaoru took one look at Haruhi and felt all the blood drain from his face. She looked mouth watering. Without thought he walked right up to her put his arms around her and kissed her. He pulled back, his heart was skipping beats and it was difficult to breath.
"Haruhi, you're gorgeous," he whispered his fingers running up the back of her thigh.
She gasped at his heated touch, still bothered by her previous thoughts.
"I'm sorry," he whispered as he continued to barely touch her. "I'm sorry, Haruhi, I'm so sorry. I thought if I had you I could satisfy that burning I always had for you and give you some space. I know you asked for it, but I was wrong. Having you didn't satisfy this burning. It only made me want you more. I know this isn't what you want to hear but I can't stop myself from saying it. Haruhi, I am so in love with you. I have been for a very long time."
"Kaoru…" she started but he cut her off.
"I don't want you to misunderstand me. It's not just your body I want. I want all of you all to myself. I really am so in love with you," he repeated.
She began to shake at his words. Kaoru was not an impulsive guy. He thought out everything he said and did. Which actually made his words much more dangerous than Hikarus, because Kaoru did not spout out whatever came to mind. If he said something he truly meant it. Which means he really was in love with her.
"Kaoru, I-I…" He braced himself for her rejection. He should have never let that come pouring out of his mouth after what she said this morning, but he couldn't stop himself.
"I'm scared," she whispered holding on to his upper arms in a tight, fearful grip.
Of all the things he had expected her to say that didn't even make the list.
"What are you scared of?" he asked her gently.
"I'm scared of what I feel for you, Kaoru, I-I think I'm falling for you," she barely whispered as if afraid he would hear her.
He did hear her and he couldn't have been happier.
"I'm scared too, Haruhi, I love you so much it frightens me, but I've never been more sure of anything in my life."
"Kaoru," she whispered as she looked in his eyes and there he was, Kaoru, her gentle flame. She grabbed his hair and pulled him down for a kiss.
"It would be a real shame if no one could see how beautiful you look tonight, but suddenly I have no desire to go to that club."
"Oh, good, I don't think I could dance in these shoes. What were you thinking?"
"I was thinking about how good they would look on you and I was right. So, you don't care if we miss the club?" he asked as he backed her into the bed.
"No. I don't care at all," she whispered kissing him as he fell on top of her.
"Can I make one request?"
"What?" she asked wondering what it would be?
"Leave the shoes on," he said as see caught the devilish smirk that graced his handsome face.
"You're so weird," she laughed.
He ran his hands under her back gliding them higher and higher until he gripped her shoulders. As he kissed down her neck his heart flipped over as it had last night but now he knew how Haruhi felt about him. Kaoru knew that this time when he joined himself to her together they would cross the border between friendship and love.
A/N: (again): Well, there you have it. Any thoughts? Please let me know what you think about it. I know I am repeating myself but I truly do look forward to your reviews and I truly value each and every one. So please if you have a minute to give me your input I would really appreciate it. Also I have a few more Ouran ideas running through my head but I'm not sure which pairing I would like to try next. I was wondering if you guys could help me out and vote; should it be Hikaru, Mori, or Kyoya, you decide. Please review then let me know your vote. I can't wait to hear from you. Arigato!