I could never be a spy. I can lie pretty well and I know how to keep my mouth shut, but when it comes to doing things that I suspect might be wrong, my Catholic guilt starts to kick in.

The envelope secured under the table next to my bed haunted me all night long. I could hardly sleep for the worry that someone would break into my apartment and steal it while I slept. Or worse, Ranger knew exactly what I'd done and would kill me when he got back from Boston the next evening. I knew I should I get rid of it without ever reading it, but I was also nervous about taking that step. What if something happened to it while I was transporting it to a safe place to destroy it? I could do it at the office in the morning, but being caught on camera shredding papers like an Enron employee might raise some red flags. There was also that part of me that didn't want to destroy them because I was dying to get inside Ranger's head. If I was considering a long-term—even life-long —relationship with this man, shouldn't I know what I was getting myself into? He had always tried to keep me away from the troubling parts of his history, so I was afraid he'd never tell me the truth. Not that I thought these files would give me explicit details of the things Ranger had done, but I hoped that they could give me more insight into what made him tick. I got ready for work the next morning feeling exhausted. Since I'd be in Sales today, I dressed in a black suit with a white silk shirt and stuffed the iPad in my purse. I left the envelope behind, still not sure what I wanted to do with it. I hadn't been confronted about it yet, so I figured I had more time to decide what I wanted to do. I didn't want to make a hasty decision to shred them and then later regret it.

I headed towards Fredrick's office, deciding I didn't want to step foot in HR until absolutely necessary. The door was open, so I knocked once on the frame to announce my arrival before walking inside. Fredrick's office reminded me a little of Ranger's, though not quite as opulent. Framed diplomas hung on the wall behind the desk. A bachelor's degree from Penn State and a master's degree from NYU. The desk was dark cherry with a glossy shine and was neatly organized. Leather arm chairs sat across the desk from a Herman Miller chair that had probably cost more than my weekly salary. The file cabinets along one wall matched the desk. The large windows allowed plenty of natural light into the office. There were a couple of pieces of tasteful modern art that completed the office. I took a peek at the two picture frames on the desk. One was of Fredrick with a pretty blonde woman, the other was of him with an older man and woman and two young women, both of whom were wearing graduation robes. The resemblance between them all made me assume they were his family. Overall, the office managed to portray success while still feeling comfortable.

"Hey, Stephanie," Fredrick said as he walked into the office. "How was your first day in HR?"

"It was okay," I replied. "I spent the day checking up on whether people are current on trainings."

Fredrick shuddered. "I'd rather crawl naked through broken glass for the next twenty years than work in HR for a day. Did Harper hound you the whole time?"

"Not really. Once he showed me how to do things, I was pretty set. I did get told off for telling someone to quit whining when they were trying to come up with excuses not to get their trainings scheduled by Friday. Apparently that isn't HR-appropriate."

"Pussies," he commented as he opened a drawer in his desk and pulled out a key. "Let's go check out your office."

I hadn't considered that I would have my own office when I had accepted the job offer from Ranger. All of the men on the fifth floor worked in cubicles when they weren't out in the field, so I had assumed that it was a similar set-up in Sales. Fredrick unlocked the door next to his and flipped on a light. This office greatly resembled his, though it was slightly smaller and lacked the personal touches.

"This is a great office," I told him. "I didn't consider having my own. I have to share with Chuck, and his office isn't nearly this plush."

Fredrick took a seat in one of the guest chairs at the front of the desk while I took my new chair for a test drive. He rested his left ankle on his right knee and gazed around the office.

"When people are looking to begin a relationship with Rangeman, we are their first date," he said quietly. "We listen to their stories, laugh at their jokes, ask about their families, and answer their questions. The guys up on five are the muscle. We are the personality, but we aren't politicians. We don't bullshit them, glad-hand them, or spew prewritten sales pitches. But we do watch their body language and follow their lead. We want them to be comfortable while discussing fees and services. We also have to know why our service is so special. What is it that we can offer than our competitors don't? Why should they pay more for our services than they could pay for similar services with another provider? That is why we have nice offices."

It made sense, and I could see why Ranger employed this man. I had a feeling he could sell sand in the Sahara and leave the buyer feeling like he'd just purchased the greatest invention ever.

"This is an important job," he continued. "Ranger believes you can do it, and so do I. I know that he wouldn't put you in this position just because you're his girlfriend. He would only put you in this position if he knew you had the skills necessary to bring in and maintain clients. I've never known Ranger to make a mistake in the people he hires. You may get some shit from a few people around here, but not from me."

It was nice to know that at least one person in the building believed that I got my position due to my abilities and not simply because I was the boss's girlfriend. He might be the only one, but it was better than nothing. We spent the next hour discussing the services I'd read about on the iPad over the weekend. Fredrick quizzed me on prices and details, asking me questions about why an upgrade would be cost-effective given the benefits. I only had to refer back to the information on the tablet a few times to be sure of my answers, but Fredrick didn't seem bothered by it. Once he felt confident that I understood Rangeman's services, I was instructed to go to another file on the iPad: the competition. While Fredrick wandered off for a conference call with the Sales departments from the other offices, I was left to begin memorizing the service and price details for other security agencies serving the same area. Two were nation-wide companies, one company had several offices throughout Jersey, and one was a tiny company serving Mercer County only, which based on my readings looked like it was close to going out of business. The fees for the other four companies were less than Rangeman's fees, but they also lacked some of the benefits. None of the companies guaranteed that field support would drive by your property daily or would have someone from the company show up at your property whenever an alarm was activated. And I highly doubted any of the other companies had a CEO who personally met with you following a break-in. Rangeman also offered a list of services that the other agencies didn't tap into, such as personal security, event security, background investigations, and cybersecurity. It was noted that none of the other security agencies held government contracts the way Rangeman did.

My time in Sales was spent reading and passed by more quickly than I would have liked, with Fredrick laughing at me as I begrudgingly made my way up to HR for the remaining four hours of the work day. I stopped in at the dining room to grab a sandwich and water before heading to the office, sure that Chuck would have me chained to my desk for the rest of the day. As soon as he heard the door open, Chuck was in the small waiting area telling me all of the things I needed to do for the day. Because Ranger insisted on be a part of all of the 600+ Rangeman employee evaluations, and handled the Trenton office's personally, the evaluations were distributed throughout the year in alphabetical order. The immediate supervisor, the managing director, and Ranger are all present at the employees' evaluations to help them understand individual employees and what changes may be needed branch- or company-wide to make employees more efficient. If Ranger couldn't be physically present, he would attend via conference call. The evaluations were scored on a numeric system that gave points in specific areas and the average of the ten areas equated to the overall score, which determined if you qualified for a pay raise or would be considered for a promotion. I was shown the scale that determined pay raise and the form letter that I would send to the qualifying employees and Accounting with their specific details filled in. The amount of access I had in this position was once again thrust into my face, twisting my stomach in knots with the memory of what I had done the day before. Not wanting to make a mistake, I pushed the thoughts aside and focused on my work.

I worked until a little after five that day, only making it about halfway through the fifty-two people who'd had their evaluations in June. I went up to the fourth floor and knocked on Aurelia's door. No answer. Figuring she might be with Ella, I went up to the sixth floor and found them pushing a cart laden with crockpots, trays filled with fruit and vegetables, and bottles of water.

"Hey, how's it going?" I asked them, holding the elevator door open for them.

"It's great," Aurelia said cheerfully. "I helped make dinner tonight. It's a chicken and rice casserole with corn and cheese, but don't tell Carlos it has cheese. We're spoiling the guys while he's away."

Ella gave me a wink that Aurelia didn't see as we rode down to the fifth floor. The cheese was probably fat-free, which barely qualified as cheese in my opinion. After learning that Aurelia had taken her medications, had talked to Ranger, and was doing well cooking under Ella's watchful eye, I said goodbye and stayed on the elevator, taking it up to the seventh floor. I had intended to watch a cooking show while I waited on Ranger to come home, but ended up falling asleep on the couch. I was awakened by him sitting down next to me and kissing me on the forehead.

"Long day?" he asked as I opened my eyes.

"I didn't sleep well last night. How are things in Boston?"

Ranger wrapped an arm around me and stretched his long legs out in front of him. "As well as can be expected. Josh had an incomplete spinal cord injury. He has some sensation, but can't move his legs at this point. Once the swelling goes down and his injuries start to heal, the doctors think his long-term prognosis is good and that he may be able to walk again within the next year with rehabilitation. His biggest concern was whether he can still have sex with his wife. He'll need more intensive inpatient rehab for a few weeks, but then he'll do the remainder of his rehab outpatient. He wants to proceed with the sale of the branch as planned and to get back into the office as soon as he can. He's reminded every man that came to visit him that while he might not be able to run after them, he can still shoot them if they get out of line."

"Wow, he sounds just like you. How did you meet?"

"He and Tank grew up together and then joined the Army together. Josh got out after his first tour and went to college. Tank went on to Special Forces, where I met him. The security business belonged to Josh's father, Jacob, until eight years ago. Jacob was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's disease, so he turned everything over to Josh while he was still competent. He died last year. The business had been struggling when Josh took over and he was almost to the point of closing when Tank suggested we meet six years ago. I bought into the company, we changed the name when we incorporated, and now it is the second most profitable branch in the company after Trenton."

"Why does he want to sell if it's so successful?"

"I told him upfront that I intended to be sole owner of the company one day and that I would eventually want to buy him out. He agreed because he doesn't like the owner role. He likes being in charge of the Boston branch—he doesn't necessary want to deal with the other branches' business unless it directly affects Boston in some way. Plus, I know he wants to use some of the money to make his mother's life comfortable and to plan for his daughters' futures."

I snuggled into Ranger and we sat quietly for a few minutes, enjoying the feel of our bodies together. He'd only been gone three days, but I'd felt the absence. I also felt the nervous butterflies in my stomach again. Did he know that I accessed his file and printed out paperwork? I had tried to be discreet when I'd put the papers in my purse, but the reality was that someone in the monitoring room could have seen what I was doing and informed Ranger, even if they hadn't confronted me directly. I didn't want to tell him, just in case he didn't know and this never had to come out, but I also didn't want to risk lying to him in case he knew.

Jesus Christ, Stephanie, you really know how to get yourself into a mess.

"How have your first two days of work been?" Ranger finally asked me.

Don't throw up, I told myself. Don't panic.

"They've been pretty good. HR isn't my idea of a long-term career. Sales seems like something I would enjoy, though all I did today was read up on the competition. On the plus side, Fredrick doesn't think you gave me a job just because we're a couple. He said he knows you wouldn't put someone in a position in your company if you didn't think they had the ability to do what was required," I said, proud that I'd kept the conversation light and that my voice hadn't shown my nerves.

Ranger kissed me on the top of the head. "He's right, and I'm glad to hear he understands the situation for what it is and doesn't make assumptions like a lot of the other guys will."

I was saved further conversation about work by a knock on the apartment door, signaling that Ella had brought us dinner. Ranger and I helped ourselves to baked chicken, asparagus, and wild rice before settling down on barstools at the kitchen island. I watched Ranger as we ate, trying to figure out if he was having any second thoughts about our relationship after Josh's close call. He would look at me from time to time as though he were going to say something, but it wasn't until he had done that for the third time that he actually spoke.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No, why?"

"You've been acting a strange. On edge, and then you said you hadn't slept well last night."

I shrugged my shoulders and looked back down at my food. "Maybe it's just getting used to a normal work schedule and learning new jobs."

I could feel Ranger's eyes on me, so I glanced up and smiled. "Really, I'm fine."

Satisfied with my answer, Ranger gave his head a small shake and went back to eating his food. "I thought perhaps you were worried about my safety after what happened to Josh."

"I always worry about your safety. I've just learned to compartmentalize it. Otherwise, I'd do nothing but worry. I did wonder if it would bother you, you know, since you used to always tell me that you didn't do relationships because you had a dangerous job."

"You told me that wasn't a valid reason for not having a relationship with you. Besides, I think you are well-informed enough to know the dangers of my job to know whether you can handle the risks."

That was a shift in thinking that I hadn't been expecting. While we had discussed that issue weeks earlier after Morelli and I had split up, I hadn't actually believed he would change his thinking on it. I wasn't sure what I thought exactly—perhaps that I'd just worn him down—but Ranger actually believing that I could make this decision for myself wasn't it. A night of mind-blowing sex and restful sleep had me feeling better the next day. I didn't think about Ranger's file being in my bedroom as much, nor did it give me the knots in my stomach that it had the day before. It was fine to sit there. I hadn't read it and may never do so. It would be fine. Ranger hadn't said anything about it, so I assumed he didn't know and that we could keep it that way.

We were just finishing breakfast on Wednesday morning when the sound of an alarm rang out. Ranger immediately pulled out his phone and pressed a button as he hurried towards the front door. He asked someone where the alarm was located as he wrenched open the door to the stairway and hurried down them. I followed behind him quickly, my heart skipping a beat when he stopped at the fourth floor and ran down the hall. The door to Aurelia's apartment was open and smoking was coming out of it. She was standing in the hallway crying and the sound of a fire extinguisher in use was barely audible over the blaring alarm. Ranger pulled Aurelia into a hug and I could see her lips moving, but couldn't understand what she was saying. She could be difficult to understand when she was upset or excited, but this was incomprehensible. It was only when Ranger spoke that I realized the reason I hadn't been able to understand her: she'd been speaking in Spanish. I saw Ella come from the elevator and walk over to Aurelia. She and Ranger spoke for a minute before Ella put an arm around Aurelia's shoulders and guided her towards the elevator. I saw Ryan Monroe, one of the Rangemen who lived on the fourth floor, come out of Aurelia's apartment with a fire extinguisher. He was clad only in green boxers, likely having been in bed since getting off his shift at an hour before. He spoke to Ranger briefly before handing the dead extinguisher to Louis and heading down the hall towards his own apartment.

"What happened?" I asked Ranger as Louis headed into the apartment.

"Lia was trying to cook herself breakfast, but managed to start a fire when she was trying to cook bacon. She panicked and knocked a roll of paper towels into the pan and caught them on fire. Monroe said it just looks like smoke damage in there, so Louis should be able to have it cleaned up and aired out by tonight or tomorrow morning. Lia's worried I'll tell our mother and that she'll have to go back to Newark."

"Are you going to tell her?"

Ranger shook his head. "No, I'm not. I told her that everyone has made a mistake when they are trying to cook, but I asked her not to try to cook anything on her own until she has practiced it several times with supervision."

Ranger and I left the fourth floor and went to our respective offices for the remainder of the day. Thankfully nothing else had happened, allowing me to focus on the tasks at hand. My mother called me at lunch time to ask if I was going to come for dinner, to which I agreed. As soon as the clock struck five, I hurried to my apartment to feed Rex and change my clothes, putting on comfortable jeans and a t-shirt. I got to my parents' house right at six, just as everyone was heading to the table to sit down. I hadn't seen my family much in the past three weeks. It had been a little awkward after the situation with Morelli and Ranger had gotten out, and the awkwardness had only been compounded when Joyce sent the recording to most of the Burg. The last time I'd been to the house was the day that Grandma had almost been whacked by Sunny, but I hadn't gone inside. As I sat down at the table, I realized that in the past week my mother hadn't once called me about coming to dinner or ruining my life until today. I looked around and gauged everyone's mood. My father appeared to be in his normal temperament, shoveling his food in without looking up. My grandmother was happily helping herself to a large serving of wine. My mother looked stressed and slightly drunk.

"I heard you quit the bond's office and went to work for Ranger," Grandma Mazur said.

I nodded. "Yes, I did. I'm done chasing criminals."

"And why exactly did we have to hear this from people other than you?" my mother asked. "Why didn't you call and tell us yourself?"

I shrugged. "It was a quick decision. Ranger had offered me the job a couple of weeks ago, but I didn't decide to take it until last Wednesday and just started it two days ago. I figured you would be happy about it."

My mother fiddled with her fork, but didn't pick it up to eat with it. "What exactly are you doing there?"

"I'm working in Human Resources temporarily, but I'll be moving to the Sales department around the first of October. It's an office job, with good pay, and I'm not going to be in danger."

"Do you think it's smart to work for the man you've been sleeping with?"

Every head at the table snapped look in my mother's direction. I was momentarily speechless, not used to my mother being that blunt or acknowledging my sex life. I managed to recover and formulate a response.

"We aren't just sleeping together, we're in a relationship. And it's fine. I never see him at work. He's always in meetings, in his office on a different floor, or out in the field. I don't report directly to him. I have other supervisors who aren't afraid to correct me if I mess up."

"Something else you haven't bothered to tell us about," my mother replied before tossing back the rest of her wine. "Why is it that I always have to hear about your life from other people? And why is that I'm always the one who has to explain everything? Why aren't you defending yourself to all of the people who call here asking about you?"

"Because I don't care what people think about me," I said. "They don't call and ask me questions anyway."

"I wish you would care a little more," my mother snapped, and I could see anger flaring up in her. "I wish you would care more about your life and reputation to not being involved with Ranger, to be able to have a regular relationship without sleeping with other people, and I wish you could manage to not get involved in the dangerous nonsense that you always seemed to find. Look at what has happened in the past month: you've cheated on your boyfriend with a secretive and dangerous man who clearly has no morals, had a video of you having sex make its way around the Burg, been set on fire by a maniac, thrown off a bridge, had cars destroyed, then your grandmother is almost murdered by the man who had you thrown off the bridge. We all have to hear about it wherever we go. Almost everyone in the Burg has seen that video and even your nieces are getting asked about it by their friends. It's embarrassing, Stephanie, and I'm exhausted. I'm tired of fielding questions and defending you to everyone, and I'm especially tired of the worry that every time the phone or doorbell rings it is going to be someone there to tell me that you're seriously injured or dead."

"But that stuff isn't my fault!" I cried. "That psychopath who set me on fire recorded me without my knowledge, and Joyce Barnhardt decided to be a heinous bitch and send out a recording that she illegally accessed. I had a job to do with catching Sunny, and it wasn't my fault that he destroyed my stuff or had me thrown off a bridge or that he kidnapped Grandma. He was a serial killer who enjoyed hurting older women."

"Those things all happened because of the choices you've made in life," my mother shot back. "You chose to go into bond enforcement. You chose to stay in bond enforcement even once you knew how dangerous it could be. You chose to get involved with Ranger, even though there are all sorts of rumors about the things he has done. You chose to cheat on Joseph. If you haven't been in bond enforcement and had just gotten a nice job at a bank or a factory like I've asked you to time and again, you wouldn't have been chasing after Sunny. If you hadn't involved Ranger in your life, you wouldn't have been set on fire three weeks ago, kidnapped two years ago, you wouldn't have cheated on Joseph and wouldn't have everyone in the Burg knowing about your sex life. And even with all of that, you still had the choice to not cheat on Joseph. What do you think is going to happen with your relationship with Ranger? Do you really think he's going to want what you want in life? Do you think he can stay faithful? What does it say about a man who is willing to sleep with another man's girlfriend?"

Anger burned inside me as I stared at my mother. My mother barely knew Ranger, yet she was judging him based on the speculation of the Burg, which was ninety-five percent crap. And if it hadn't been for my involvement with Ranger, I'd have been dead a long time ago. He had saved my life so many times, I'd lost count. I'd never disclosed my feelings for him to my family because it would have only driven my mother to drink and my grandmother to ask inappropriate questions, plus there had been my relationship with Morelli to consider. But now I had a safe job and a stable relationship, but my mother was berating me for it. I decided I didn't want to stay and continue the conversation, since it was almost a guarantee that it wouldn't resolve anything, so I stood up and grabbed my purse from the back of the chair.

"Where are you going?" my mother asked, standing up as well.

"You've made it clear what you think of my life. I'm sorry I'm not Valerie, who had a perfect little life until her husband left her for the babysitter and she came home penniless with two kids and got knocked-up by a bumbling lawyer twice before he'd commit to marrying her. I'm sorry I embarrass you and worry you. I've made changes in my life so that it shouldn't happen anymore, but clearly that isn't enough for you. So I'm going home," I said before hurrying out of the house and to my car.

As I pulled away from the curb, I saw my mother standing in the doorway watching me. I didn't make any acknowledgment as I drove down Liberty Street and headed back to my apartment. I hadn't considered that my relationship with Ranger could possibly come between my family and me. They hadn't exactly approved of Morelli when we'd first started dating, but over time they'd accepted him. I had assumed that Ranger, not having been responsible for taking my virginity and then broadcasting it on bathroom walls around the Burg, would have had a slightly better reception in the beginning of the relationship. He had only ever been polite and considerate with my family, even when he'd had to see my grandmother naked. I was now worried about whether my family would open up to Ranger. I knew Grandma Mazur wouldn't be a problem. She loved Ranger and wouldn't miss an opportunity to see him. My father had only met Ranger a couple of times, but had seemed to like him. As much as my father showed like for anyone, at least. But my mother had the potential to be an issue. If she couldn't accept my relationship with Ranger, then what? Did she expect that I'd end it? Would I be willing to distance myself from my family for my relationship? I hoped it wouldn't come to that, but wasn't sure what exactly was going to happen if it did.

A/N: I'm not a Helen Plum hater. She is from a generation with a different mindset than Stephanie's, but also has some valid points in her argument, so this won't be a Helen-bashing story. Just FYI.