((Chapter heading is a line from the song Teach me War by ASP. It translates to Cannot move at all, can only ask you.

Also I have currently got two ways this story can end. That depends largely on what happens in Infinity War and whether or not I have to write a sequel. But apart from what is probably the very last scene, I know what I'll do.))

10. Kann mich nicht rühr'n, kann dich nur bitten

Thor should have felt relieved when he was finally alone. But the closed door seemed to choke the will from him. He walked to the desk. There was a beautiful and very valuable pen Loki had wheedled out of a reluctant Korg on his first visit to him in his function as the quartermaster. Silvertongue … He picked it up and felt the sting of tears. There was a burning wound where his brother had been. But this was one betrayal to many, attempting to drive him into suicide by forcing himself upon his mind.

He closed his eyes and for one moment, like an image on the inside of his lids, he saw Loki sitting on the ground, one arm reaching towards him, his face a mask of terror. Thor shook himself. As if Loki had ever been terrified in his life.

He had to call in the council. They would discuss what Loki had done. He would be sentenced to die. And even though Thor's heart bled, he knew he had to do it. His brother was a threat to everyone on this ship.

Ϡ

The ship truly had no room that could hold Loki against his will. But what good was the fact that he could walk away when there was nowhere he was wanted? He had options. Several options.

He could keep himself out of sight, even from Heimdall. He had done it before, he could do it again. When they reached their destination, he could slink away in silence.

He could refuse to obey Thor's order and let Heimdall kill him. There was a certain allure to that thought. He had felt it before and he knew it wasn't healthy. But he had grown from there, had become strong enough to push the call of despair back into the depths of his soul where it came from. This wasn't over and he would not die and leave Thor to deal with the grief once he came around.

And last, he could use the Tesseract to get off the ship and away. He might return later, whenever. Or not. These were not technically his people. For what it was worth, he could go to Jotunheim and claim the throne. It was his. He could be a King.

'I didn't expect you to be here.'

Loki jumped and turned to the door. 'Ah, Heimdall. Well, speaking of expectations, I expected it to take longer before my sentence is passed.'

Heimdall shook his head. 'I would like to hear your version of the story.'

'What, you do not believe your King? Isn't that treason, Heimdall?' When his provocation wasn't heeded, Loki closed his eyes and shook his head. 'What do you want?'

'Answers. Like I said.' Heimdall closed the door behind himself. 'Someone got into Thor's head, didn't they?'

'Yes.'

'Any idea who?'

Loki looked at him. 'You wouldn't believe me if I told you.'

'Heid.'

Loki's mouth fell open. 'You noticed what Gullveig said.'

'She talked about the killer as if she knew it's a woman, which we didn't.'

Shaking off his mental paralysis, Loki approached him. 'And Gullveig is protecting her sister at all costs. But she slipped up.'

Heimdall nodded. 'I don't believe you tried to hurt our King.'

Loki looked away. 'Thanks.'

'But you need to stay here for now. Who knows what she'll do if we force her hand?'

'Kill Thor. She might do that anyway.' Loki balled his hands into fist. 'If she does, I'll show her pain the likes of which she cannot imagine in her wildest dreams.'

Heimdall's eyes seemed to search Loki's very soul. 'You brother loves you. He will remember that. But you have to be aware that he has a duty to his people.'

Punching Heimdall seemed very tempting, but Loki refrained. 'I know he's going to find his queen eventually. And I will step aside when that day comes. Until then … I will take what he offers.'

'You're going to get hurt.'

Loki swallowed. 'That I will.'

The tall Asgardian slowly shook his head. 'Prepare yourself for that day. It may not be coming for a very long time yet. For now, we should focus on the problem at hand. It seems right now Heid is content wielding the power by having him ensorcelled. When that changes, we'll be out of time.'

'We have to do something well before, then.'

Heimdall opened his mouth and closed it. 'Oh no.'

'What? Is it Thor?'

'No.' He looked at Loki. 'Change of plans. Come with me.'

'This is treason.'

His expression grim, Heimdall glanced at Loki. 'Wouldn't be a first, would it?'

Ϡ

Loki was about to tell Heimdall he didn't believe him that this had nothing to do with his brother, when the guardian stopped in the middle of nowhere. 'Oh dear. Here they come.'

Loki wasn't certain what he expected, but it wasn't Fjalar and Nari. They skidded to a halt in front of him. Nari looked frightened. Fjalar grabbed Loki's sleeves. 'Aunt Solvi,' he said. 'She's …'

Loki took Fjalar's hands into one of his and placed the other on top of his head. 'Heimdall, you go to her. I'll take care of the boys.' To Loki's eternal surprise, Heimdall walked away to follow his order without question. He shook off his amazement and directed his attention to the two boys. 'I understand. Come with me, I will hide you. If you trust me.'

'Thor tried hiding us.'

'He isn't me.' He should have known that Solvi wouldn't leave. Not that Loki thought for a moment that Thor had anything to do with this, but he had probably persuaded her to stay. He hoped he was wrong. When this was over, he would eat himself up with guilt.

'We trust you,' Nari said. 'Aunt Solvi said you saved Thor's life.'

'Well, then let me save yours now.' Walking briskly, Loki brought the children down to the lower levels of the ship. Before they got close to the armoury, he stopped. 'Take my hands. You will not see me or each other, but we need to get inside the next door. Make no sound, touch no-one, and don't let go of each other. If you do lose contact, we're going through the door Korg stands next to, all the way to the last room on the left. You will hide there and only come out at night. You can grab food and anything you need then, but you need to stay put during the day at all times. Crawl into the ventilation if anyone gets close to your room. Hide until I pick you up. No-one else can know you are there.' He tried to sound reassuring. 'We'll talk once we're there. All right?'

The boys nodded and Loki hid them all from sight. They kept clutching at his hands all the way, Nari gently and Fjalar with an almost painful grip. They got past Korg without much effort. The room he had brought the boys to held broken furniture. It would do for now. It had to. 'Listen. I know how this feels.'

Fjalar opened his mouth and would have shouted if Nari hadn't had the presence of mind to cover his brother's mouth with a hand. 'You don't know anything!' Fjalar hissed at him once Nari let go of him.

Loki gave him a lingering look. 'I have lost my family, too. Like you, all I have left is my brother.' He didn't mention that that, too, was in the balance. 'I know exactly what it's like. To have no power to save those you love.'

'You still don't.' Tears of rage were running from Fjalar's eyes. 'I told her I wished she was dead and Mother alive.'

Loki nodded slowly. 'What child would not prefer their mother to an aunt they had little to do with?'

'We didn't have little to do with her,' Nari said in a small voice. 'We just …' He fell silent and looked away. 'We were so angry.'

Loki clicked his tongue. 'Tell me the truth, Fjalar. Did you love Solvi?' The boy nodded, bottom lip trembling. A small smile formed on Loki's face. 'Then she knew. Believe me that. She knew what you truly felt. Your words, they may have hurt her, but she knew she had your heart.'

'Why would you think that?'

Loki stood up straight. 'Because,' he said, 'if I'm wrong, my own Mother didn't know what she meant to me when she was taken from me, and I refuse to accept that. Now keep safe. I will come and get you soon. I promise.'