Tearing me apart from all angles
The whole day at work went tortuously slow, I had a very long conversation with Lorraine after she found me refusing to talk or work with joey.
Lorraine dragged me away from joey as I was getting angry on the verge of a break down, joey had told me I should let him explain and I guess I just lost it.
The conversation with Lorraine turned out to be interesting though, first off I explained the burglary to her which she already knew about from joey or Alice.
Then I told him about the whole fall out thing and me giving joey a choice in what he wants. Alice had told me the girls name 'Faye brooks' apparently.
I found out while Alice had got so angry now, Faye was one of Alice's best friends or supposed friend anyway.
It was also Faye who she was out last night, she'd stopped in the spare room at Alice's last night, unbeknown to me.
Apparently I didn't see Faye this morning because she was in her room getting ready for work which had to be where I worked too didn't it? not that it mattered if I saw her or not.
Well anyway joey gave Faye a lift to work because Alice had forgotten she was even in the flat, I'm not gonna lie, this piece of information pleased me and made me very happy.
I mean they obviously weren't that good friends if Alice can't even remember her stopping over, can they?
Back on the subject of Lorraine, she gave me the rest of the week of work, saying its the least she could do.
Two reasons, one being I had handed my final piece of work in today which was two days early and the company who it had been sent to had phoned Lorraine telling her how impressed they were.
They bought the logo I had designed and had contracted me to do all other future design work for them, word got around and Lorraine had phone calls from several companies asking to contract me, which I also agreed to.
This pleased Lorraine a lot as it meant good reviews for the company which brought more clients our way.
It pleased me the most though, I could finally be proud of something that was useful to my life.
The second reason being the second I mentioned Faye's name Lorraine seemed to lose all look of emotions.
Turns out that Faye is actually Lorraine's stepdaughter, I wasn't quite sure how to feel about this really, it could've gone either way.
I had referred to Faye as a trashy blonde, which at the moment Lorraine found halirious, I'm not sure she'd find it so funny when she knew it was her stepdaughter I was talking about.
Lorraine went onto explain what trouble Faye was and how she practically hated her, she only got her the job here because her boyfriend, Faye's dad almost begged her.
Lorraine informed me that Faye would only be trying to get in with joey for his money, not that this made me feel any better, if joey wanted to be that stupid then that's his own fault.
I'd only seen him once today, well one time apart from in the car park. He came into my office through the slide doors trying to explain to me why what happened with Faye had happened.
I really wasn't interested, not today anyway and I did good on making sure he knew that too, in the end he just left but leaving the slide doors open, so he could see me I'm guessing, I hope he didn't think he could just apologise and I'd fall head over heels.
That was when I went and had the talk with Lorraine, making my way back into the office I bumped into abi.
"Abs! What are you doing here?" I said pulling her into a hug. "I was looking for you" she said. "But I wasn't supposed to pick you up from the airport until the weekend" I told her.
I looked at her more closely and to be honest she looked awful. "Has something happened because you don't look good abs" I said.
She burst into tears, obviously not being able to hold it together any longer. I pulled her into a hug straight away trying to calm her down.
"Is everything okay here? Anything I can do to help sweeties?" Faye said as she walked up to us I her sweet icky voice.
Abi ignored her much to my delight, then she came and stood in front of me "do you want some help with her sweetie?" She asked me.
Oh she had a nerve. I raised an eyebrow at her before speaking "no thanks sweetie.." I said prolonging the word 'sweetie' and making it as sarcastic as I could.
Faye's face dropped, clearly not getting the reaction she received from me. "And we certainly don't need your help"I snapped before dragging abi away and into my office.
"Go Lauren" Alice giggled running after me as we all walked into my office. We all sat down in the sofa "is she okay?" Alice asked me as abi laid into me with my arm wrapped around her.
I guess you could say Faye got me back for what just happened outside, my heart felt like it was just gonna stop working, how could joey just do this to me?
I glared at joey and Faye through the still open slide doors, joeys eyes connected with mine, searching for some kind of emotion, by the look in his eyes he found it.
I peeled them away as I heard Faye's giggle run around the room, "I'm gonna kill her, stupid tramp" Alice said going to stand up.
However much I did love Alice's choice of words I didn't want anymore dramas today, especially not joey related ones.
I jumped up to stop her making abi jolt and look at us both confused as she didn't know what happened between us yet.
"Alice please don't, not today anyway" I begged her. She scoffed at them both before thankfully sitting back down on the sofa.
"What's happened with you and joey? You sounded so happy the other day on the phone" abi said. "Ill explain later abs I promise, all im saying is.." I trailed off. "What?" Abi asked "she happened!" I said pointing at Faye which she didn't miss.
Abi glared at Faye and joey before turning her attention back to me "what about you? You sounded happy on the phone too, why are you back home when you weren't due home for another three days?" I asked her.
More tears rolled down her cheeks "come on abs why are you so upset ey? And where's jay? Come on tell me what's happened?" I asked her.
She cleared her throat, attempting to speak but the on flood of tears and harsh lump in her throat created a barrier.
"Abs? Your scaring me now.. What's happened ey?" I asked her getting more worried by the second. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Faye storming out of joeys office causing me to smile.
"I, erm I-" abi began but again the tears stopped her. I watched as joey walked to the doorway and watched on with a concerned look on his face, I'd tell him to move but I had more important things on my mind.
I got of the sofa and got on my knees in front of abi, holding her hands in mine. "You k is you can tell me anything right?" I asked. She nodded at me then looked to the doorway.
I followed her eyes to uncle jack as he came into my office. Okay what was happening here? "What are you doing back here?" I asked him.
"I picked abi and jay up from the airport" he told me. "And where's jay now?" I asked wondering if it was jay that was the problem here.
"He's down at the car with Oscar" uncle jack said. "What? What's Oscar doing here?.. What is going on?" I asked them both getting annoyed now.
"Babe calm down" joey said resting his hand on my shoulder. I shrugged his hand of immediately, how dare he think he could just touch me like that or tell me what to do.
"Do not touch me and I ain't your babe" I snapped. "So?" I asked, turning my attention to uncle jack and abi once again.
"Do you want to tell her or shall I?" Uncle jack asked abi. "Someone just tell me!" I shouted. Abi started to sob again "mum" she cried.
My stomach dropped I knew exactly what she was going to say. "What about mum?" I asked. "She's dead" abi said falling into Alice's arms.
I froze up, a million thoughts running through my head. "Her cancer came back babe and there's nothing the doctors could do to help her this time" uncle jack said.
"But that's not fair, I missed out on everything last time so shed get better, I failed school, lost friends I lost everything so she could get better" I said my tone getting angrier with each word.
I knew joey was looking at me concerned but I tried to ignore his presence. "And for what for nothing! Because she's dead!" I snapped.
"It wasn't for nothing because you were amazing babe and you got your mum better, you prolonged her life by helping her fight" uncle jack said moving over to hug me.
"So what happened?" I asked.
"When I got to Ireland mum was already in hospital, she'd collapsed, the cancer was terminal" abi said. "Did you see her?" I asked hoping she got to see her.
"I did but she made me look after Oscar until yesterday when she allowed me to see her again, she only had minutes left Lauren" abi frowned.
"Here" abi said handing me an envelope. I looked at it then back at abi confused. "It's from mum, she asked me to give it you" abi said "thanks" I whispered back.
"Mums so proud of you Loz you need to know that, I told her about your new job" abi smiled. I miled back at her greatfuly, I only ever wanted to make her proud.
"She told me to tell you that you are the most amazing person and she's enjoyed every minute of your life, your beautiful and so talented" abi said. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, I can't believe I'd lost the most amazing woman.
"She's also got in her will that she wants you to look after Oscar not dad" abi told me, still crying. Lorraine had joined us by this point too, it was becoming a bloody mothers meeting in here.
I began thinking everything through, nothing added up, not really. "Why did none of us know about mums cancer?" I asked.
"Because mum only found out when she collapsed" abi sighed. i furrowed my eyebrows together, feeling confused.
"Babe your mum hasn't been going to her check ups" uncle jack said. "What? Why wouldn't she go to her check ups?" I asked.
"She said she was too busy looking after Oscar, the house and going to work" abi sighed, rubbing her hands over her face.
"What about dad? Surely he could've helped? Made her go to her appointments?" I asked them. They both looked at each other nervously.
I stood up "what's he done?" I asked. "Dad started having an affair moved in with this woman about a month after they moved over there" abi said angry, angry for abi anyway.
I just glared at them, that man never failed to surprise me. "You what?" I snapped. "What the hell is wrong with him, he's supposed to love her! You don't do that to the people you love" I said.
I didn't miss the glare Alice shot joey followed by the raised eyebrow, joey shifted awkwardly as we concentrated on the conversation again.
"I found out who broke into the house too" uncle jack said. I glanced at abi, not sure she knew about it, I know I hadn't told her.
"I've explained it to abi" uncle jack said. "So?" I asked. "The woman your dads with, well she was in ha relationship with another man, her husband" uncle jack said.
"Wow I'm really shocked" I sighed annoyed. Uncle jack chuckled "basically this guy 'Carl' his name is he wanted revenge so he trashed the house, he knew you were in there, he took a picture of you and sent it to your dad" uncle jack said.
"Oh god will he come back?" Alice asked. "Not likely" uncle jack told her. "Your dad freaked out so he's currently waiting for you at the house" he said. "Great" I muttered.
"Come on abs lets go home" I sighed. "Woah you ain't going back in that house" uncle jack told us. I sighed and me and abi glanced at each other.
"What kind of an uncle would I be if I let my nieces and nephew go back in that house?" He asked me. Abi sighed realising she'd lost the argument, luckily for her I didn't give up that easily.
"An understanding one" I smirked. "Lauren" he sighed. "No this is my choice, me abs and Oscar wanna go back to our home, your only across the road we'll see you everyday" I told him.
Uncle jack sighed, he'd lost this one. "right where's my boy?" I asked. Uncle jack rolled his eyes at me before leading everyone out of the office.
"Lauren, wait!" Joey said, grabbing a hold of my hand. "What joey?" I sighed, turning around to face him.
"This whole thing with Faye, it's not what you think" joey said. I rolled my eyes at him, how could it be anything else?
"You kissed her joey, you kissed someone else an hour after I asked you if it was me you wanted" I told him.
"No Lauren, she kissed me and I swear I was just about to push her away when you saw us" he said in a begging tone.
I wasn't sure what to think or believe, I wanted to believe him so bad, I really did because this hurt way too much.
"If you was gonna push her away why was she giggling and stuff with you in your office?" I asked him.
"She won't leave me alone, I know it's a lot to take in and believe babe but I swear to you I'm telling the truth" he told me. "Joey" I sighed, not wanting to get into this now.
"I know you've been through a lot today, just believe me, there was never any choice because its you everytime, it's only ever gonna be you there is no choice" he said. "You have to believe me!" He said.
I scoffed at him " yeah and why's that then?" I asked going to walk away. "Because I need you but more importantly because I love you" joey said loudly as I was just about to reach the office door.
I turned around, I didn't even know what to say, how was I supposed to respond to that? What if he was only saying that so I'd give him another chance?
"Don't make this any harder than it already is" I told him. "It doesn't have to be hard babe, I know how much your hurting with everything that's happened today but me and you can get through this together" he said.
Tears swelled in my eyes, I wasn't sure whether I should follow my head or my heart, as cheesy as that sounds it was true.
"As much as i hate him for what he did to you this morning, it's clear as day you both need each other" Alice said from the doorway.
"Yeah I agree" abi smiled at me. I knew they were right but I didn't wanna admit it not just yet anyway.
"Please babe, I love you and want to be with you, forever" joey said. Boy did he know how to pull on my heart strings.
"Too much has happened today, I need to be with my brother and sister" I said before simply walking out of the office.
I knew I wanted joey but it just had to wait, I could decide what I wanted to do after I'd dealt with my dad.
Sorry for the very long wait!
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