Some Like it Hot

Armageddon was lounging in Mac's pickup, a book in her hand - No Country for Old Men - and was reading when Ed, a guy that was in that horrid group that they were in came into her vision. Armageddon had found the book in one of the very many empty cars that she had passed a couple of days ago, and considered herself very lucky because she had been wanting very badly to read this book before the apocalypse hit. She had also seen the movie, once or twice, which was comfortable because then she had a reason to think back to Con and Murph who were probably dead by now, or thought that she was. She told herself, while her eyes read the words, that she couldn't think like that, she had to stay positive even though she knew she wouldn't be getting away any time soon. Why the fuck not? She asked herself and flipped the page, even though she had not taken in the last two pages. She was just looking at the words while her brain was somewhere else than in Cormac McCarthy's story. She had asked herself this question millions of times and always told herself that the Dixon brothers would not let her leave, even though she had had more than a couple of times to actually follow up on her words. One of these days I will- she thought to herself but was cut off when she heard Ed start talking. He was talking to Mac and Merle. Daryl was somewhere off. Probably hunting, she thought to herself and watched them. They had broken her concentration but, for a valid reason, as she kept on listening.

"That's a nice girl you have there" Ed said and pointed to her. Armageddon glared at him and then the two brothers whose eyes followed.

"Yeah, she is" Merle said and flashed her a smirk. "Feisty, too."

"Which one of you is fucking her?" He asked them.

"The fuck's it to you?" Mac asked and arched his brows.

"Why don't we switch, you get my bitch and I get yours" He answered. "For one night."

"That's not up to them" Armageddon called out, putting the book down and hopping out of the truck. They barely glanced at her.

"Your bitch ain't worth shit" Mac said and glanced at Ed's tent, not far away from their campsite.

"Yeah, especially compared to ours" Merle said. "What else you got?"

"Are you seriously bidding me?" She asked and approached them.

"Shut up" Merle said and pushed her back.

"Fuck you" She said and pushed him right back. Now she was standing between the two Dixon brothers and that asshole named Ed. "And you, fuckhead, you couldn't get me even if you paid a million fucking dollars. So, why don't you fuck off and go screw that daughter of yours or something, since you're so bored."

"You better watch your fucking mouth" He said and stepped closer. He smelled disgusting. Either Mac or Merle grabbed her shoulder and made her back into their embrace.

"Why don't you go make yourself useful" Mac said and pushed her back. "You can go clean my truck."

"You can do it your fucking self" Armageddon snapped. He rolled his eyes at her and turned back to Ed.

"So, where were we?" He asked. "What have you got that we can trade."

Ed thought about it for a while before coming to a decision. "I got ten thousand dollars."

"Money ain't no good" Merle said before Mac could say anything. "Why not give us some of your rations?"

Ed seemed to think about it.

"That's a stupid thing to ask for" Armageddon mumbled and waited.

"Shut the fuck up, you ain't in this" Merle said and barely glanced over his shoulder to look at her.

"I'm not?" She asked and laughed bitterly. "Then who the fuck are you fucking trading on?" They didn't answer, just ignored her. Armageddon figured that if Ed, that fucking shithead, would come after her thinking she would give into Mac and Merle's every command, he would have another thing coming. She sat down far away from them, her back against a tree and she rubbed her temples. She closed her eyes and focused on a mental picture of her two husbands.

"I think we did a pretty good job on this" Armageddon said, her mouth full of candy, and plopped herself on their couch.

"Are you sure?" Con asked and put down the bags he was holding, putting them next to hers. "Are you sure we don't need to buy another pillow or something?" He sat down beside her and put his feet on their coffee table.

"You mean another blanket" Murph chimed in. "We bought, like, five pillows." Armageddon started laughing while Con only chuckled.

"Yeah, laugh now but you'll stop when you remember how small this shitty apartment is" Con said and smiled. When Armageddon stopped laughing and was serious enough, she said;

"I like how small this shitty apartment is," She looked from one brother to the other. "Because it's cozy and because every couple starts with an apartment like this."

"Not celebrities" Murph said and shrugged. "Now, scootch." Armageddon sat more upright and moved closer to Con.

"We might need to get a bigger couch, though."

Armageddon was snapped out of that nice memory by a sense of another person close by. Really close by. Her eyelids snapped open and there it was, another human being standing in front of her. Armageddon wiped that smile off her face and looked dead serious at that person.

"What do you want, Glenn?" She asked and squinted. The sun was right behind him, just shining upon her, burning her eyes if she kept them open for more than a couple of seconds.

"I was just thinking..." He started but stopped. "Hey, Armageddon."

"Hi."

"I was just thinking... Like, if you're not too busy or anything..." He kept starting and stopping, so awkwardly that Armageddon wasn't sure if she should laugh or snap at him. "If we could go on that supply run?"

Armageddon's eyes widened for a second, like she was surprised, then her face straightened again. She even flashed him a brief smile. "Sure," She said. "I have nothing better to do." She stood up and followed him as he went to the car he used for these things. Armageddon glanced back, right before she got in the car, to the Dixon brothers who were still talking to Ed, and met all their eyes before turning back and getting into the car.

I really need this sort of thing, she thought to herself as they drove to the city. Something to take the edge off, something to pump me up because nothing else will, except a fight with Mac or Merle. This thing, these supply runs all felt so edging yet, relaxing in a way because it made Armageddon feel like she was actually pulling her weight, that she wasn't this useless broad that the two oldest Dixon brothers kept saying she is. Of course, the real reason why she kept on going to these things with Glenn was because she kept fantasizing on finding Con and Murph there, in the city, scouting for things while looking for her. Or that she'd get separated from him and be led away from the camp and toward Boston, although a thousand miles apart, and that she'd just keep on walking for days - if not weeks - and then she'd just find her two husbands and they'd be reunited again.

But, of course, no such thing happened. They went to a convenience store that was near the city limits and they scooped up everything that was left; two candy bars, a rotten banana, beef jerky and a couple of liters of Pepsi.

"This'll have to do" Armageddon mumbled and shrugged as she looked at the stuff in the backseat as they drove back. "They're just gonna have to live off Daryl's hunting for another day like the rest of us." Glenn nodded and winced when she mentioned Daryl's hunting. "What, you don't like his squirrels?" She asked and grinned.

"Nobody likes his squirrels" He answered and grimaced.

"You fucking princesses" she mumbled and chuckled.

"That's easy for you to say" He said and glanced at her. "You get the good stuff."

She raised her brows at him and waited for him to continue his absurd statement. "No, I mean like..." He started but trailed off. "You're like..." Everything he started always just got cut short.

"I'm like what?" She asked and raised her brows at him.

"His, uh.." He was fidgeting now, his fingers twitching on the steering wheel. "Like, uh, his posse." That made her burst out laughing, just like she always used to do when she was with Con and Murph. And she laughed for five minutes, barely breathing, another thing she always used to do with Con and Murph.

"Wow, I've missed that" She mumbled after she had gotten completely over that. "Oh, that was amazing." Then, she remembered that she was in a car with a person that was not one of her husbands so she straightened up. "You don't know how much you made my day with that joke." Glenn was furrowing his brows and glancing at her like he wasn't understanding the language she spoke. He was probably going to correct her on that, but decided against it, thinking he'd been laughed at enough for one day.

Another thing that Armageddon kept daydreaming about, this one was mostly when she was on her way back to the camp, was dead people overpowering them, Glenn and her, and she'd die. It was pessimistic, a thought that was too pessimistic for her to have, in her opinion if she was going to stay sane throughout the apocalypse, but yet, as they drove back she thought about it and wished it would happen. Maybe it was because deep down all Armageddon really wanted to do was to just give up, stop fighting and admit defeat to the world. Or, maybe it was because she was sick of her life, sick of being with the Dixon brothers and treated worse than her conscience when she was thirteen and had no self-esteem, before she met Con and Murph. She wasn't sure which and maybe she would never know.

When they arrived, Armageddon noticed that there were no Dixon brothers or an asshole named Ed hounding her and she took that as a good sign. Only hungry civilians who wanted real food and not some jerky and a banana. Armageddon didn't have to explain herself, this was life nowadays. They wouldn't have appetizing meals every day and they just had to deal with that, she sure as hell did. She separated herself from the group, ate her dinner in silence and thought about life. Daryl brought her some squirrels and even sat with her for a couple of minutes. That was probably the highlight of her day because she finally got to be with someone equally miserable on the inside.