'You never know what will save you…'
It was raining, properly, for the first time in weeks and Cassidy enjoyed every second of it. She stood outside of their tent, letting the rain soak her clothes and hair, her face tilted up towards the heavens.
Kyle…
For once she let her mind wander, let it cross that threshold she otherwise stayed away from. To her relief it wasn't the painful memories that swarmed her, it was a memory of Kyle and her when they were kids, running around out on the lawn in the rain. Kyle laughing and doing his interpretation of a rain dance, claiming it was because of him it was raining – Cassidy had played along, content with the knowledge that her brother was happy.
The ache in her chest intensified and Cassidy crouched down in the grass, wrapping her arms around herself, rocking back and forth slowly. It didn't do her any good reminiscing, the pain she figured, would always be there. Would always cripple her and tear at her heart.
Hearing the tent flap being pulled back Cassidy quickly straightened herself up, glancing over her shoulder she saw Merle coming out. He paused and took in the sight of her, for a moment they simply stood there, letting the rain wash over them both.
"Gonna head out, git yar ass inside 'n dry up."
After the incident at the house Cassidy felt that they had come to an understanding, but that didn't stop Merle from finding excuses to leave the camp. When she'd asked Daryl about it he had simply scoffed and said that his brother needed another outlet, it had taken on the form of hunting down and disposing of walkers.
"Be safe…" She walked over to the entrance of the tent and Merle held the flap open for her, when she slipped inside he let it close behind her and then he was gone.
xxx
They were in the tent, on separate cots and it was quiet. But like the silence between them in the beginning when they had first met, this one was far from tense and awkward – It was comfortable.
Like always Daryl kept his hands busy, the knife in his hand carving into the piece of wood had a skill that spoke of years of experience; Cassidy was lying on her stomach with a book under her nose. Though it bothered her that Merle was roaming around out there alone she took comfort in the fact that Daryl didn't seem to be the least bit worried – He knew is brother.
After having finished a few chapters Cassidy looked up to find Daryl studying her, he had pulled himself up in a sitting position some time ago but was still carving away at the piece of wood in his hands, she couldn't tell what it was suppose to be just yet.
Raising an eyebrow at him she dog marked the page she was on and closed her book, he only looked at her directly and for a long period of time if he had something to say.
"Why didn't ya?" Daryl's voice was soft, the usual drawl and gravel missing.
"Leave?" She asked, not exactly sure what he meant, but when his nod confirmed her inquiry she frowned slightly. "Because I'm not a complete idiot…"
Amusement lit up in Daryl's blue eyes and she had the urge to stick out her tongue at him, but she didn't. She was an adult, she could deal…
Smug bastard.
"I know that on my own my chances of survival drop, here with you and your brother it spirals up." Cassidy rolled onto her side, supporting her head with her arm.
"On some level I know you both have my back, your actions speak for themselves and in a situation like we are in… I want you and Merle on my side."
Daryl had a neutral expression, his eyes didn't give away what he was thinking and surprisingly enough neither did his very animated eyebrows. The man could convey dozens of different emotions with those eyebrows alone.
"So 's 'bout survival."
"Partially… If I just wanted to survive Merle would be a wild card, still got the bruises to prove it." When she mentioned bruises, Daryl's eyes squinted together and his eyebrows narrowed.
"Think he's commin' around though, so what if he runs his mouth. I'm a big girl, I can handle it." When Cassidy smiled, Daryl seemed to relax even though his eyebrows still stayed narrowed.
"Yar tha first girl I know who's been 'round my brother this long and not fooled 'round with him. Who's told 'im no…" At that Cassidy started to giggle.
"Well he's gonna have to get used to it, it's gonna happen a lot!"
"Why not just do what he says? Make it easier.." Cassidy stopped laughing and gave Daryl a sober stare. He looked unsure, almost confused.
"Because I've been there before, someone controlling me, telling me what to do… what to say…" Unconsciously she fiddled with her long braid. "I'd rather have a few bruises and be yelled at then go back to that…"
Suck it up.
xxx
Two weeks later.
"You know, you are a bad influence on me…" Cassidy took the offered gas can from Merle and he gave her a smirk.
"Took yah long enough tah figure that one out sweetlip."
"I've aided you in burglary, theft…" She motioned to the car they were currently siphoning gas from. "Hotwiring cars and siphoning gas, I have a feeling my mama would not have approved of you."
"Yah sayin' ol' Merle aint the sort ya'd bring home tah mommy?" He placed a hand over his heart and feigned hurt, even giving a pout of his lip before the same cocksure smirk reappeared.
"I'm saying daddy would have greeted you with the barrel of his rifle." Cassidy couldn't help but laugh at the mental picture she was painting for herself, shaking her head she placed the clear tube between her lips and sucked in her breath. The amber liquid poured into the tube and Cassidy continued on with her task, dumping the gas in the can at her feet.
"Though I have to admit, you do know how to show a girl a good time." They smiled at each other as they went on with their task.
Daryl was standing on top of the truck, keeping an eye on their surroundings. It was easy to see for quite a distance, the road they were on stretched out onto the highway up ahead and on either side was willowy grass and bushes.
Merle had been in a good mood the entire day, after the night they spent at the house neither brother had been sure Cassidy would stick around, but there she was, two weeks counting.
She no longer tensed up if Merle happened to brush up against her or grab a hold of her, the first day on the road as they left the small town behind she had practically been sitting in Daryl's lap and it had rubbed at him, that she was afraid of him being near her.
By the end of the day he had opened his mouth and actually started to apologies, only to catch himself. Dixons did NOT apologies. But he was sorry and because Merle couldn't say it, he tried to show it instead.
Cassidy started to hum as she picked up the now full can of gas and headed back towards their truck, she made sure the container was sealed tightly before easing it down on the bed of the truck and smiled at Daryl as he jumped down from his outpost.
They had started to come together as a unite, chores being taken care of without anyone having to ask what needed doing and on the road the three of them were starting to blend into one efficient machine.
"What was tha 'bout Merle an' a rifle?" Daryl wanted to know, Cassidy grinned.
"Oh just informing him how things would have gone down if he had ever come a calling on me, my daddy would have greeted him with the barrel of his rifle." That managed to get a rough chuckle from him as he opened the passenger door and let Cassidy slip in before pulling himself up in the seat.
"Have ta say I'm havin' a problem visualizing Merle on a proper date…"
"Tsk, been out with plenty of women." Merle scoffed as he got in behind the wheel.
"I have no doubt, but has it ever been a proper one?" At his blank stare Cassidy rolled her eyes and started to explain.
"You know… When you pick her up, take her out someplace nice and then at the end of the day you drop her off and give her a kiss goodnight."
"Why tha fuck would I do that? I aint goin' out with her to get a kiss! Well at least not on tha damn lips!" Cassidy shook her head and she shared a look with Daryl.
Go figure.
As Merle turned the keys in the ignition she scanned the road ahead of them, they had stopped by the only visible car but more and more of them were popping up along the highway and Cassidy couldn't help herself when she started to sing the tune she'd been humming earlier.
"No stop signs, speed limit. Nobody's gonna slow us down. Like a wheel, gonna spin it. Nobody's gonna mess me 'round. Hey Satan! Payin' my dues, playin' in a rocking band. Hey mama! Look at me, I'm on my way to the promised land…"
Apparently the brothers had picked up on the song she was singing because Daryl smirked and shook his head while Merle laughed and taped the rhythm on the steering wheel.
"I'm on the highway to hell! Highway to hell.. On the highway to hell! Highway to hell!"
xxx
A week later.
Cassidy inhaled sharply as the needle pricked over her sore bleeding skin, she was sitting with one leg on either side over a park bench, her left arm resting on its table. Merle was sitting next to her, hunched over her arm as he worked on the tattoo on her wrist.
"Ben 'nouther of yar brothers?" He grunted as he continued with his work, Ben's name taking permanent form on her skin.
"Mhm, second oldest."
"He dead too?"
"Yeah." Cassidy looked up at the clear Georgia sky, avoiding looking at Merle so he couldn't see the tears forming in her eyes. She felt him wrap his hand over her upper arm and squeeze but he didn't speak up or offer his condolences.
"How'd it happen?" The sting of the needle returned and Cassidy dared to look over at Merle again, his head bowed, eyebrows narrowed as he focused on his work. It was taking its time and it was painful but she'd figured that was the case with 'homemade' tattoos, he was after all doing it with a bottle of ink and a sewing needle.
"Close after the outbreak I think, I found him after…" Her hand clenched into a fist and Merle snapped at her to relax, she was messing up the tattoo. Then when he just looked at her, not going back to his work, she continued.
"He had a wife, kids. It wasn't pretty… or easy." Cassidy shrugged, Merle had once again turned his attention back to his work. "But he would have done the same for me, that's no way to leave your family… all… all…"
"He'd turned?"
"No… the kids." The images invaded her and Cassidy was almost afraid to close her eyes, scared that if she did, the images would get worse. "Damien and Patrick, my nephews."
Merle didn't ask any more questions after that and Cassidy found herself able to battle down the guilt and horror, remaining silent at his side. When he was done he dipped one of his rags, which looked suspiciously clean, down in a bucket of water and cleaned off the blood and excess ink.
He then pulled out a small tube from his saddlebag and stroked a fatty ointment over her irritated and inked skin, Cassidy didn't question his methods, it was the first time she got a tattoo after all – What did she know.
"Yah want yar baby brother's name on there somewhere ya ask Daryl tah do it, mah hands fuckin' cramped up." Merle drawled in a heavy accent, it dawned on her then that he must have been tired as hell seeing as he'd done most of the driving that day and it was Merle who'd had the last shift the night before.
"I will… Thank you for this, I love it." She smiled over at him while placing her hand over his, apparently she took him by surprise because Merle blinked at her and seemed frozen for a second before he grunted and quickly got up, yanking his hand away.
"Gonna sleep, don't wake me the fuck up till suppers ready!"
They both glanced over at where Daryl was seated, once again cleaning his arrows, Cassidy knew by now that as long as Daryl had something to preoccupy his mind and hands with, he and Merle were less likely to clash. As if feeling their eyes on him Daryl snapped his head up and glared at them both in turn.
Merle smirked and started towards the tent, slapping the back of Daryl's head as he walked past. Daryl threw a punch at his retreating back before glaring back at Cassidy, when she didn't look away, simply smiled at him, his eyes squinted.
"What?"
"Would you do me the honor of tattooing Kyle's name?" Because he knew she wouldn't mock him about something concerning her baby brother Daryl placed the arrows aside and got to his feet, halting and awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to the other when Cassidy laid down on the wooden table, pulling her tank top down, exposing the slope of her breast, covered by her bra.
"I want it over my heart, is that alright?" She'd taken notice of his discomfort, Cassidy wasn't a shy woman and it was only in consideration for Daryl that she hadn't pulled the top off all together – He'd already seen her scars.
He remained where he was, not able to look straight at her, instead he gazed back and forth while pressing his lips together.
"I.. hrm, I guess I can have it someplace el-"
" 's gonna hurt." Daryl spoke up and looked at her, still shifting his weight. When she smiled and as she laid her head back down again he closed the distance between them and sat down on the bench.
"I reckon it wouldn't mean as much if it didn't…"
xxx
A month later.
"Gonna have to stop, get some more gas. Plenty of cars to pick from." Cassidy scanned the road ahead as Merle slowed down, the truck slowly rolling over the asphalt.
"Bit to many, don't ya think? I only got so many arrows." Daryl narrowed his eyes as he too scanned ahead, they had been avoiding large gatherings of cars simply because of the risk. A lot of cars could mean a lot of walkers and over the weeks the group had become more careful, Merle no longer walking off alone, none of them did.
"Dun make her any less right baby brother. We need tha gas." Pulling the truck to a stop Merle opened the door and got out, brining his shotgun with him and as he did Daryl got out as well with Cassidy sliding out behind him.
As always Daryl stayed behind, quickly getting up to higher grounds to be able to check their surroundings, the scope on his crossbow being a welcomed help. He had a sharper eye then Merle, not that Merle would ever confess to it and Daryl had more experience then Cassidy.
They had been out a solid half an hour without finding enough gas to fill even one of their cans and Merle was getting frustrated, his temper flaring and for every car they went through without sufficient gas he'd end up slamming his fists into the metal.
"You wanna take a break?" Cassidy glanced over at Merle, the sun was killing her and she knew he was as sweaty and bothered as she was.
"Don't need no fuckin' break!" He bellowed and Cassidy raised her hands in defeat, he huffed and brushed past her to the next car. A sharp whistle got their attention and they both looked back in Daryl's direction, he was pointing at something to their right.
"Move!" He hollered as he jumped down from the truck, Merle and Cassidy spotted the herd of walkers, they were still at a distance away but Daryl's voice had spurred some of them on to pick up their speed.
"Merle…" Cassidy spoke up as Merle simply stood there, she stepped over to him and saw the look on his face – He wanted a fight. "Merle, no.. Come on, there's too many of them."
He didn't listen and shrugged off her hand when she placed it on his arm.
"Git to tha truck woman." And with that Merle was off, firing the shotgun, taking down one after the other. She could hear Daryl yelling but Merle didn't seem to care and she couldn't leave him, couldn't just head towards safety. Even though what he did was fucking stupid.
"Merle you fuckin' hillbilly!" Cassidy found her voice and her anger as she took off after him, aiming her revolver at one walker that was getting close to Merle. As it went down she continued running, the panic was starting to set in when she realized just how many walkers there were and Merle was already smashing skulls.
"Merle!" She could hear Daryl cussing something fierce behind her, but he was still too far behind to be able to help and running he couldn't fire his crossbow. Cassidy had almost reached Merle when a walker caused him to stumble and lose his balance – That was all it took.
With no sure footing the walker coming in after easily took him down and they both went down on the asphalt hard, her heart stopped as she heard Merle scream out.
"NO!" Daryl screeched and Cassidy kicked the walker off Merle, shooting it in the head simultaneously as she reached for Merle, seeing a large piece of metal sticking out from his bleeding thigh. Raising the revolver she shot down two more walkers as Merle struggled to stand, when it was clear he couldn't Cassidy snaked his arm over her shoulder and started dragging them towards Daryl.
"Daryl, the truck, get it turned around! It's a fucking herd, GO!" Daryl stopped and stared, but only for a split second, the look on Merle's face caused him to turn around and sprint back towards the truck.
Blood was oozing down his leg, soaking the jeans he was wearing and his breath was labored, but he kept on pushing forward, for every step leaning a little bit heavier on Cassidy. A few times she had to stop, turn around and shot a walker that was coming up to close and it slowed them down and soon she was out of bullets.
"Cassi... git to tha truck." Merle's voice was a wheeze, barely getting the words out before breathing in heavily, saving her strength she shook her head and kept on dragging him – Sheer stubbornness keeping her going.
The truck started up and then Daryl was standing by the open drivers' door, raising his crossbow, taking aim at the walkers behind them. Somewhere Cassidy found the strength to give Merle a piece of her mind.
"Aint leavin' you.. never gonna leave you behind you fuckin' bastard." Instead of mouthing off he gave a weak chuckle, his face pale and scrunched up in pain.
"Girl after ma own heart…"
Cassidy got the passenger door open and Daryl helped her haul Merle up on the seat and when he was inside Daryl took off to get behind the wheel, Cassidy jumped up, slamming the door shut and then turned her focus on Merle, finding one of the shirts she'd used earlier and pressed down on the wound making Merle curse loudly.
Daryl was suddenly behind the wheel, slamming his door shut as well and then pressed the gas pedal down, leaving the walkers in the dust. His face was carved in stone but his eyes betrayed him as they kept glancing over at Merle every few seconds, the anger, as with Cassidy, probably keeping him from feeling anything else – For the moment.
"He got… a-anything useful in that stash of his?" Cassidy hardly recognized her own voice, it sounded so frail, but Daryl seemed to understand what she was after and after a moment he shook his head.
"Fuckin'.. argh… piece of shit… layin on tha ground like… like that.. argh!" Merle continued to curse and only stopped when Cassidy gave him a withering glare, wrapping the shirt around the wound and metal to dress it better.
"He's gonna need stitches… bandages, antibiotics, Daryl I don't have a med kit." Her hands were soaked in Merle's blood and they were shaking, so she pressed them down around the wound, ignoring the pained curses it earned her and just kept the pressure on.
xxx
"There!" Daryl exclaimed, pulling Cassidy out of her shock, looking around. Then she saw what he was pointing at, on the side of the road was a gas station.
"They should have a first aid kit." Driving like a man possessed Daryl crossed straight over the road, doing a small U turn to get to the other side and then hit the brakes hard.
"I'll go on in-"
"No! Stay… See to him, if those stinkers come this way you have to be here. I'm out of bullets." Cassidy didn't bother to wait and opened the door, jumping out.
"No fuckin' way ya goin' in there with just yar bat!" Daryl was getting out of the truck as well, but Cassidy glared at him.
"One or two walkers I can deal with, take care of your god damn brother!" She quickened her steps and came up to the service entrance of the gas station, feeling the knob, finding it locked, she didn't hesitate as she kicked the door open. Then waited a few seconds, ready for a walker to come at the noise, when that didn't happen she stepped inside and Daryl lost sight of her.
Inside the station it was boiling hot and the stench made her stomach turn, but Cassidy shrugged it off and continued in deeper, all the while listening, checking her surroundings. She may be in a hurry but she wasn't going to go and get bit when the Dixon brothers were counting on her.
"Stupid redneck fuck… god damn macho son of a bitch…" Cassidy kept on muttering under her breath till she found the office, the door already open, she checked the corners, behind the door and waited a moment before leaning the bat against the wall and started going through the boxes, shelves and cabinets.
"Come on.. come on, 's got to be here someplace…" Panic started to set in, knowing that for every second she spent in here, Merle was losing more blood. Tearing supplies off a shelf she cursed and bit back a sob, she couldn't find a first aid kit.
That's when she heard it, standing there in the chaos she had created, the sound of someone cocking their gun.
"Hands where I can see 'em."
-ooo-
I know, Im evil to the core. Dont worry, there's still gonna be another chapter up this weekend! I have an annoucment to make though, last week I recived my very first fanart of Cassidy! Oh yes I did! : D If you're curious I have the link on my account side, you know where you can check my info and the stories I've written and all that junk.
I am so happy that y'all seem to enjoy the ride with me, and because of some requests from readers I included some Daryl quality time. Its not that Im playing favorites with the boys, but in my mind I dont see Daryl as someone who would seek out conversation and someones company, Merle is the big talker *nods* And speaking of Merle, he does crazy shit.. what can I say!
Thank you everyone for staying with me, reading your reviews make my day and dont hesitate to send me a PM if you feel like it, as always take care!