The Rise and Fall of James Potter

Disclaimer: None of the characters, places, etc. that you recognize are mine. They belong to J. K. Rowling. The title, the title of each chapter, and the inspiration for this story are all from David Bowie's The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust. So all of that belongs to David Bowie.

Chapter Ten: Suffragette City

They hated me.

All the Gryffindors, right down to the scrawniest first year, were pissed at me for losing the game, as if I was the only one on the team.

Okay, yeah, I get it.

I felt so guilty, too. I'd let them all down: my teammates, my housemates, even Professor McGonagall (she'd hoped that I'd be able to lead us to a spectacular Quidditch Cup victory this year).

The guys weren't mad at me, at least. And of course, Lily didn't dislike me any more than she usually did, which I suppose is a plus. On the down side, she never liked me all that much to begin with, so I'm still at square one there.

I hate life.

I hate life.

I mean really, after five years you finally start to like a bloke, and everyone else has to go off and start hating him. It's so very unfair.

"I really don't get it," I said to Nora on our way to class. "It's not like he's the only person on the team. They all lost, not just James!"

"Yeah, but he's the captain, so there's a little extra accountability on him for that. And besides, think about it; who gets all the credit and glory when the team wins?"

"Well, James does," I answered.

"So when they lose, who do you think gets all the credit?"

Grumbling unhappily I replied, "James does."

Stupid bloody logic.

So I was sitting in History of Magic next to Sirius, and he was trying to cheer me up.

It wasn't working.

"Shut up, Padfoot, he's talking about a quiz."

"Some of the questions will be of the essay variety," Binns droned from the front of the classroom. "Some of the questions will be of the identification variety…"

"Well, listening to him is fun," Sirius said sarcastically. "But you know what's funner?"

"'Funner' is not a word, dimwit."

"I am of the firm belief that if you are describing something that is more fun, the word used to describe it should also be fun. Ergo, funner."

"You must have so much spare time to come up with all this crap."

"What else am I supposed to do during detention?"

I sighed. "Look, just forget it. It'll be okay, everyone will get over it eventually."

"Absolutely," he said encouragingly. Then, a balled up piece of parchment came sailing through the air and hit me squarely in the back of my head. "Okay, maybe it'll take a little longer than we'd hoped."

Has Binns ever even listened to himself speak? Honestly, that's probably how he died: of boredom from listening to one of his own lectures.

James just looks so dejected over there. Sirius was clearly trying to cheer him up, but come on.; Tthe loss in Quidditch combined with one of Binns' lectures is enough to make anyone look so… suicidal.

I don't think he'd actually kill himself over something like this. He once threatened to kill himself if I didn't go out with him, but then Sirius hit him in the head and took him away before he could make good on the promise.

Thank Merlin, too, since I like him now and all.

Well Slughorn still likes me.

Shit, my life could not possibly get any worse!

Honestly, of all the people in the school who I wouldn't have minded hating me, it probably would have been Slughorn. But nooo! He's got to be all "Don't worry about it, m'boy!"

This is unbearable.

This is unbelievable.

I mean honestly, it's been a whole week, and people are still talking about it. You'd think that bra found in the fourth floor corridor would have taken over the gossip by now.

Really, what is the world coming to?

Well, what happened next in the common room that night probably wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done, I have to admit, but somebody had to do it. And it certainly changed the topic of all the gossip.

I haven't spent much time in the common room for the past week (for obvious reasons), but I'm a little upset that I wasn't there tonight. From what Sirius told me, I would have wanted to be there for this.

Lily Evans was… defending me?

Yes, I was defending James. You got a problem with that?

I just got so sick of those people talking about him. Sirius and Peter were both in the common room, and I could see Sirius was ready to explode. But I beat him to it.

"Would you all just let it go!" I shouted angrily.

Suddenly, the common room was deathly quiet, everyone looking at me in surprise.

"I mean really, have you people got nothing better to do with your lives than gossip about someone who's done absolutely nothing wrong? Yes, Gryffindor lost the game last week," I continued, stressing the team name. "But it wasn't James' fault. So why don't you all just bloody let it go!"

I took a deep breath, and as my anger faded the realization dawned on me that most of my housemates were present, looking absolutely gob-smacked at my rant.

It registered in my mind that someone was clapping. Wait, what? Looking around, I realized that it was Sirius Black, and he was smiling at me. I was thrown off, but I gave him a small smile back before looking around the room and quickly running out.

That's how Sirius told it anyway. That she defended me and told everyone off for talking about me.

That's my girl!

Of course, she's not technically mine. But I can dream, right?

He came up here to tell me, and I was so shocked that I barely noticed him leaving almost immediately afterwards.

I was sitting quietly on the stairs between the sixth and seventh floors, staring down as the stones shifted and turned to change direction. After fifteen minutes of this, I heard footsteps and turned to find Sirius settling himself next to me.

"You know, if you didn't want to be found, you should have looked for a better hiding place," he said carefully.

"I'm not hiding," I snapped, a little too harshly I think. "I'm just thinking."

He looked down, then straight out at the portraits on the far wall. "Look, Evans, I know you and I haven't gotten on well in the past, but…" He took a deep breath as if it was something new and difficult he was doing, and, really, I suppose it was. "I want to thank you for what you said. I was about to start yelling at the smarmy bastards myself, but I think you got the point across pretty well," he said with a smirk.

"Yeah, well, they just really ticked me off, you know? Talking about him like it's entirely his fault when it's not. It's a team sport, for Merlin's sake, but they're all treating him like some sort of pariah!" I was getting angry all over again, and had to calm myself by remember that Sirius was on my side.

"Yeah well, he feels like he let them all down. I told him it was stupid, but he's beating himself up over it all the same."

I nodded, and thought for a moment. "Sirius, if you don't mind me asking, is there anything else bothering James?" I really needed the something else to not be me. If I'd done something to upset him this much… Well, I did punch him for kissing me. And scoffed at his proclamations of love. And I have rejected him for years. Oh Merlin, it's all my fault! Okay breathe, Lily, I'm sure it's not me. There must be something else bothering him. Hopefully.

Sirius looked at me thoughtfully and nodded. "The reason he was so distracted at the game," Sirius began, and took a breath. "His dad's ill."

And now I just feel silly for my little inner freak-out. "Oh my… is it very serious?"

"It was hard to tell from the letter. His mum told him not to worry, but you know James…"

"He's not really one to do what he's told," I said with a wry smile.

"Not really, no."

I was lying on the Quidditch pitch, arms folded under my head, my glasses sitting on my chest. I was just thinking about everything, staring at the cloudy sky, when a fuzzy red shape obstructed my view. Slipping on my glasses, I watched Lily as she first leaned over me, then brought herself to the ground and lay next to me, also staring at the sky.

"How are you doing?" she asked after a few minutes of silence. She turned her face to look at me, red hair twisted around her shoulder.

I looked back at her, smiling at the soft concern in her eyes. "Okay, I suppose."

"Sirius told me about your dad." I simply nodded. "Have you heard anything?"

"Not recently. But no news is good news, right?"

She shrugged. "I don't think so, but then again I'm terribly curious. Too much so for my own good, really. I can't stand not knowing."

I gave a short laugh, and we fell back into our easy silence.

"I hear everyone hates me now," I said flatly. "You've started quite the trend."

She laughed quietly. "Hey, I was hating you way before it was cool." Even I had to laugh with her on that one. She opened her mouth, paused, and then decided to carry on with what she was saying. "I never really hated you, you know. It was more of an intense dislike, I'd say."

I lifted myself up onto my elbows so I could better look at her. "And how about now?" Her green eyes focused on me sharply. When she didn't answer right away, I asked again, "How do you feel about me now?"

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The way he was looking at me, so intensely, with hope mingled in the gold-flecked eyes, made my next move inevitable. I barely knew what I was doing as I raised my head off the ground. I put my hand behind his head and brought him down to me.

Our noses grazed each other ever so lightly as I paused. "Does this answer your question?" I asked before covering his lips with my own. I felt him twist his body so that it was directly over mine, shifting one of his arms to cushion my head.

I was gone.

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As much as loved the feeling of kissing Lily, I must say this is not the most comfortable position to be in. Maybe if I try shifting…

Ow! I think I just twisted my spine out of place.

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A/N: One more chapter to go! Okay, not much to say here, so thanks for reading, and please review!

Also, Binns' lines about the questions on the quiz, I had a teacher say that, and I just couldn't resist using it. The whole Sirius speech about the word "funner," was actually something my beta huggingbother (who is absolutely fabulous!!!!) said the other day. She makes me giggle…