Author's Note:

Thanks very much to my Beta, Letomo. He did an amazing job in making this chapter better.

The following ways of notation may be found in this story. This is excluding whatever I need to represent chatting, texting and stuff like that. And you can thank Twilightwanderer for the Abbott and Costello.

Speech: "Who's on first."

Thought: *What's on second.*

Vision: #I-don't-know's on third.#

Thanks to the latest to recommend me: DofEire, etienneofthewestwind, wolfman

Reviews are much appreciated, they inspire me.

Chapter 10: Riddle me this

Lockhart let out a deep breath. The Gryffindors knew a way into the Chamber of Secrets. And no Slytherin worth his salt and Salazar was worth several quintals at least, would build a secret room with only one exit. Even if he needed the Potter boy to open the door…He smirked. He could use the Granger girl as a hostage, force Potter to help him…If the little Weasley Princess was still alive this might actually still work to his advantage…The Basilisk would take out Potter and the Weasley boy, he'd get out of the Castle and to America, he'd claim to have taken out the Basilisk and he'd have two perfect little toys…Yes, things were looking up, indeed.

Luna snuck out of the Ravenclaw Common Room and up to the painting of Dr. Scansion. "Hello Doctor."

"Good day, Miss Lovegood."

"I'd like to go in and see Myrtle, please."

"Hmmm. What is held dearer than gold and closer than cloaks and is as warm as self?"

Luna rolled her eyes. "Is this supposed to be difficult? Blood or kin." He portrait nodded and swung inwards. Luna stood still and dumbstruck.

"Miss Lovegood? That was the proper answer? Miss Lovegood?"

Luna nodded, ran past the painting and into Myrtle's room. "MYRRI!"

Myrtle floated through the door into the sitting room. "Luna? What's wrong."

"Kin! Blood! Inheritance! What is the thing everybody knows about Slytherin?" Luna was jumping with excitement.

"Err. He was a Pureblood fanatic?"

"No, about his family! His talents!"

"Err. He was a very powerful wizard who spoke…Parseltongue…The Faucet!" Myrtle slapped her forehead in realization.

"It's not just a word; it's how you speak it!"

"Brilliant Luna! We need to get Potter and have him open the thing, and a lot of teachers as back up. Come on!"

The second floor bathroom was a lot less gloomy since Myrtle had made her home elsewhere and had cheered up. It was also cleaner and smelled a lot better, but there was still a sense of oppression. The three Gryffindors stood by the sink opposing the toilet cubicle and Harry addressed the faucet.

"Open! Come on! Open!"

Ron shook his head. "Still in English."

"Try harder, Harry!" Hermione urged. "Think like a snake, think how snakelike the faucet is and the way you felt when you spoke to the snake that was attacking Justin Finch-Fletchley."

Harry rolled his eyes and Ron smirked, both making certain Hermione couldn't see them.

"What is going on here?" Gilderoy Lockhart stood in the doorway, wand out and at the ready, his blonde hair carefully swept away from his face and a wearing a set of no nonsense brown and black woollen robes instead of his usual pastel and blues.

"P-professor Lockhart?" Hermione stammered.

"Yes? I did say I was going to take the beast down…Now what are you children doing here?"

"Errr…we think we found the way to open the Chamber…Errr…Well, err you see, err Harry can speak Parseltongue and there is a snake on the faucet here, so obviously you need to do something with the snake, and well, I thought, obviously, talking to the snake might work, so errr…we're having Harry talk to the snake." Hermione replied anxiously.

"I see…that is very good thinking…except for one important part…" Lockhart said sternly. "You should have come to me or Headmistress McGonagall."

"Yes, Professor Lockhart."

Lockhart smiled down brilliantly at the three. "But I think that if I told you to stay here while I went in there, you'd feel terrible…especially you Mr. Weasley…and I've learned not to underestimate the power of coincidence and fate. I think it would be wise if you went with me." He raised a hand. "With suitable precautions. I'll go first, then Miss Granger, then Mr. Potter, then Mr. Weasley." He looked between the three. All three Gryffindors nodded.

*Gryffindors…Somarvellouslypredictable…Alwaysjumpinbeforetheythink.* Lockhart gloated.
"Well then Mr. Potter…talk to the snake."

"Err. Open Up! Open Up! Osshhhsshshsh!" The faucet span, shining with a bright white light that caused the children to cover their eyes and Lockhart to squint his. The sink sank away, revealing a large pipe below it. Lockhart hung over it and sniffed, wrinkling his nose. When Ron made to move for it he held him back.

"Mr. Weasley, we don't know the quality of the air or about the presence of inflammable gases. I for one like to come out of these little jaunts alive." He said dryly.

Ron and Harry exchanged glances with each other and then looked at Hermione, who looked triumphant and smug. The boys sighed. Tonight would be full of I-told-you-so's.

Lockhart made a move with his wand over the pipe and pursed his lips. "Air's good…smell's bad. Something died down there."

Ron sobbed. Lockhart turned round with an apologetic smile. "That sounded wrong, Mr. Weasley. Something died down there long enough ago to rot…and that can't be your sister! Now, chin up, and let's go down there." He sat on the edge of the pipe and wrinkled his nose again. "Trust a snake to build a slithery pipe." He grinned at the three and winked. "Hold your noses if you can. Otherwise keep your arms by your sides. Wait for half a minute before coming after me, Miss Granger, and you do the same, boys. And don't go in head first! We don't know what's down there!" He took a deep breath, grimaced at the taste of the air and slid down.

Ron and Harry looked after him. "Blimey…why wasn't he ever like that in class?" Ron said with something like awe in his voice.

"Well obviously Professor Lockhart really shines when things become truly dangerous. He must be like a- a tightly coiled spring, that takes time to wind up before it can function!" Hermione gushed. "He's sooo brave!" Hermione cooed as she looked at the smelly, slimy hole in the ground through which her hero had disappeared.

"Yeah…err…I think it's time 'Mione."

"Oh. Right. Yes." Hermione sat down at the edge, took a deep breath, held her nose and with her other arm tight by her body, slid into the pipe. Harry and Ron followed half a minute and a minute later.

They arrived in a corridor lit by two Lumos spells, both giving a blue light.

"Blimey. We must be right under the lake." Ron said, obviously impressed.

"Ah, boys. Welcome to Slytherin Snake Tunnels!" Lockhart gestured at the snakes twining their way along the corridor and smiled. "Now, I want you to cast Lumos spells, but concentrate on the light being blue! I've found that it's less glaring in tunnels than white."

Ron's wand fizzled and Lockhart tutted. "Well, that won't do. I'll see to it you get some royalties from the book I'll write about this, after we've saved your sister."

"S-she's down here?" Ron asked hopefully.

"Hmmm. See this?" Lockhart lowered his wand and pointed at several places on the floor where the algae that covered it seemed disturbed. "Someone walked here. If we follow these, we should find your sister." He smiled kindly and waved a hand to get them moving. "Let's go! No time to waste with a damsel in distress!"

Ron laughed in spite of the situation. "Ginny hates being called that!"

Lockhart grinned. "Well then, I'll make a special point to call her that in your hearing." He cautiously moved forward, his wand at about waist height and held in front of him with his arm crooked, his eyes flicking from side to side.

"Keep an eye out for dangers and side tunnels. We can't afford to be ambushed. Close your eyes immediately you see movement!" He said warningly.

They moved for a while, until the first rat skulls came into view. Lockhart smiled encouragingly at Ron. "Well, there we have what died. Obviously the Basilisk has been keeping down the rat population. Come on."

Hermione walked very closely behind him and looked at his back adoringly. "H-have you ever fought a basilisk, Professor?"

"No, Miss Granger…Hermione. I haven't. They're quite rare, thankfully. Which is also the reason we took so long identifying it, though in hindsight it is obvious." He grinned back over his shoulder. "Some points for my old House, eh?" His head suddenly shot forward, gazing at the floor and he held a hand out to halt the procession. He took two careful steps forward and swore softly.

"Professor? Is there something wrong?" Hermione asked hesitantly.

"Nothing I should not have expected. This is a very old Basilisk, so it is big." Lockhart stepped forward and the three Gryffindors saw the huge, twenty foot empty skin on the floor. Lockhart grinned. "Big and slow." He took several steps beyond the skin and stopped again.

"Oh, Grail! Harry…Those intertwined snakes to our left…the white ones with blue eyes…would you talk to them?"

"Sir, the tracks move on…" Ron began.

"Hmm, yes they do. The walking tracks. But There's only one of me, and I'm up front…so if there's something behind that door…I want to deal with it beforewe go on." Lockhart said quietly, eying the snakes.

"How do you know there's a door there, sir?" Harry asked as he stood before the snakes?"

"Ah, I have a little addition to my Lumos spell. It moves in air currents, just like a flame. It takes a bit of practice, so I didn't teach you like the colour change. Try Open up again, please Harry."

Harry cleared his throat. "Open up! Open up!" The two intertwined snakes moved apart, showing a large, dark tunnel.

"Hmmm. I'd say that leads to the Forbidden Forest." Lockhart mused. He took a few steps inside and looked at the floor. "This hasn't been used in a very long time…it might be the tunnel Slytherin used to build the Chamber. May I have your wand for a minute, Hermione?"

Hermione handed her wand over without hesitation and Lockhart grimaced as he cast a Lumos with the unfamiliar wand and then went inside with his own wand unlit but ready.

"Ah. So we can go and save Ginny now?" Ron asked hopefully.

Lockhart moved suddenly and stood beside Hermione, his wand pressed against her pale, slender throat. "No, Ron, sorry. I'm going to go down that tunnel, with Hermione and your wands. You see, I need a way out of this castle before Professor Snape catches up with me. And since all the exits are warded…this is it."

"What? What about Ginny?" Ron blurted out.

"Well, she'll die. Or be saved, we did leave the door open. Now, lay your wands on the ground, gently. No sudden moves or Hermione meets with an accident." Lockhart pushed his wand into the Hermione's throat and the girl rose on tip toes, tears in her eyes as the hard point bruised her flesh.

"But what about all those things you did, the people you saved?" Harry's voice rose with anger. "Why won't you save Ginny!"

"Oh, I never saved them, or defeated those creatures. I merely found the people who did, wrote down how they did it, Obliviated the memories of their actions out of them, found background information and wrote the books. It was quite easy, not nearly as hard as beating the things my self." Lockhart replied easily, as if confessing to taking one of Dumbledore's sherbet lemons.

"But-But you know lots about it!" Ron demanded indignantly. "You just showed us!"

"Oh, indeed. But I only use that to keep my selfsafe, Ronald. No reason to put the Great Lockhart at unnecessary risk." Lockhart responded calmly. "Now, without your wands I'd say it might be wise to wait here. No light and no magic…Not even the Boy who lived is likely to win that…" Lockhart smiled evilly. "Don't worry, I'll write a moving chapter about your sacrifice…Wands, boys."

"You utter bastard!" Hermione spat.

"Oh, really now Hermione, my parents were decently married. Wands!" The man gestured at the ground and the boys reluctantly put their wands on the ground. Lockhart moved Hermione's wand and the two wands on the floor flew beyond him into the passage. Lockhart backed away from the male Gryffindors, keeping his wand at Hermione's throat all the time.

Once he was well within the tunnel he smiled cheerily. "Have fun killing the Basilisk!" He pointed his wand at the ceiling muttered "Confractio", pulling Hermione even further back with him. The ceiling cracked and fell, sealing Hermione and Lockhart in the tunnel. Hermione screamed as Ron and Harry tried to dodge the falling ceiling while trying to get to her. The rocks fell and Lockhart retreated, keeping a careful hold on the girl and a lookout to see if the boys had managed to get to his side of the collapse.

"Well, that seems to be that. You will note, Hermione, that I used a small Blasting Charm instead of a Blasting curse. Wouldn't want the whole place to come down upon our heads, now would we?" Lockhart grinned. He pushed her ahead of himself and then gave her a shove, making her stumble and fall. Lockhart quickly picked up the two wands, Ron's spellotaped one and Harry's, and shoved them in a pocket of his robe with Hermione's. Then he roughly hauled Hermione to her feet by her arm.

"Now then, we'll go for a little walk under the lake and then a little walk to through the woods. Have you ever been to America, Hermione? I'm sure you'll love it there…" He put his wand back at her throat and herded her onwards. Hermione gritted her teeth and bit back her tears.

"Professor Kettleburn! Professor Kettleburn! M-Mr. Hagrid!" Luna gasped out as she ran through the hallway.

The old teacher turned around and smiled kindly. "Miss Lovegood…" His smile changed into a scowl. "What are you doing out of Ravenclaw Tower, Miss Lovegood?"

"C-chamber…We know how to o-open the chamber of S-secrets. " Luna gasped.

Kettleburn eyed the breathless girl and the ghost floating agitatedly beside her. "Well, Miss Jones? How is the Chamber Opened?"

"Parseltongue, sir." Myrtle said quietly.

Kettleburn's eyes opened wide. "Parseltongue…at the little snake on the faucet! Of course. It's so simple!"

Myrtle smirked. "Well it would have to be, sir. It would have to be figured out by a Slytherin…"

Kettleburn barked out a laugh. "Quite so. Well, Hagrid and I were just headed to the Teachers' Common Room. I suggest you join us to inform the faculty and the Headmistress. Come on."

Harry had rushed towards the door as soon as Lockhart's attention seemed drawn to the ceiling, but the collapse of the roof made him dive away again. Putting his arms over his head he ran and dove out of the rain of rocks, dirt and stone, leaving him panting and covered in small debris. He looked around. "Ron? Hermione?"

There was no answer. Harry leaned against the rock pile, swallowing. That Hermione would not answer was likely, that Ron didn't was ominous. "RON! COME ON MATE! SAY SOMETHING!"

There was still no answer and Harry dashed some tears from his eyes.

"Okay, Harry, think. What are you going to do?" He muttered to himself. "You have no wand. You have no friends…" He swallowed again. *AtleastwiththestupidPhilosopher'sstonethingIhadHermioneandRon…* He winced at the memory of Ron sacrificing himself during the chess game.

"It looks alright further on. I'll go look for Ginny. Once I've got her safe, we can clear a path to get out together. Yeah. And Ron will be digging on the other side, or he'll be getting help. Yeah."

Harry Potter took a deep breath and walked down the tunnel to save the damsel in distress, wandless and alone.*Imustbebloodydemented.*

The tunnel was cold and dark and Harry kept stumbling, the occasional flash of greenish luminousity from patches of moss and crystals imbedded in the walls not enough to give him a real feel of the place. Except the cold and dark. That he got plenty of feel for. The tunnel ended a fact Harry found out by walking into the wall. Her carefully ran his hands along the wall and felt twining, twisting snakes carved into it, much like the ones of the door Lockhart had had him open, but much larger. He cleared his throat and spoke. "Open!"

The great emerald eyes of the snakes flashed and they moved aside, their noses meeting in a Roman arch meters above Harry's head.

The room he entered was huge, he could feel the change in air pressure, and saw by a weird greenish light that emanated from the snake carved walls huge twisted pillars marching down a great hall. The end was invisible in the greenish gloom.

"Wonderful. Big, stonking great hall…I could do with a bit more light." Harry muttered. Immediately there was a whooshing noise and all along the walls of the great room serpent shaped torches lit up. Harry blinked. *Musthavebeenspeakingparseltongue.Well,atleastIcanseenow.*

The Chamber of Secrets was even more huge and pillared in the light of the great flambeaus than his first impression in the half dark. The pillars were snakes and snakes twined and undulated along the walls, great friezes and carvings, each scale lovingly detailed, each eye and tongue and poisonous fang magnificently rendered from the hard stone. The torches marched along the walls and the serpent pillars and a great bronze chandelier hung in the middle, writhing serpents making up its form, forked flaming tongues flicker from their mouths.

At the other side of the room a huge statue rose up, an old man with a stern, fanatical face and a rather iffy beard. He looked, to Harry's eyes, like a bad Chinese villain from a bad nine teen fifties movie. At the feet of the statue lay a small, dark huddled mass. The light from the torches shone brightly on her dark red hair and a sob tore from Harry's throat as he hurried towards her.

Ginny was cold to his touch as he knelt by her, and her breathing was shallow. There was a movement between the legs of the statue and Harry looked up at it. Tom Riddle was leaning against the right leg of the huge statue, looking relaxed with his arms crossed. He seemed to be not wholly there, an outline only, that was slowly being filled in and becoming solid. Harry's eyes grew hard. "Riddle. You bastard. What did you do to her?"

The door to the Staff Common Room was opened and Hagrid and Kettleburn herded in a ghost and a still rather breathless first year Ravenclaw.

Kettleburn grinned. "Miss Lovegood figured out how to open the door to the Chamber of Secrets, I'm positive!"

Minerva McGonagall, who'd been talking quietly to Filius about how to inform the parents of the closure of the school, looked up with an astounded expression on her face. "What? How?"

"Parseltongue, spoken at the little snake on the faucet. Now, apparently Potter speaks the language, lets dig him out of Gryffindor tower and have him speak at the bloody thing and then Hagrid and I will go step on a basilisk's neck."

Snape sat in the corner, scowling and glared at the older teacher. "Oh? You have experience at fighting Basilisks?"

Kettleburn gave the younger man a pointed look. "Yes, Severus, I've killed three. Most of the last batch of basilisk based ingredients you've got in your cupboard come from one I killed. Most of my Gringott's vault contents as well. Your point?"

Snape opened his mouth to reply when Minerva intervened. "Gentlemen! A young girl is in danger and her parents will be here within an hour, after Professor Sprout has delivered the message. Now we have a chance, no matter how slim, to save her, and by Merlin's robes, we will take it! And there will be no more wand size comparisons, do you both understand?"

Snape nodded. Kettleburn grinned. "My, I forgot how feisty you could get, Minerva. Now, let's go to the Loo and have Potter talk to the snake."

Minerva nodded a slight flush on her face. "I will go and fetch him, Filius, you're in charge."

Filius shook his head. "No, Minerva, Silvanus is in charge. He's actually fought a basilisk and he's fought in caves. Come on, Silvanus. It will just be like Poland."

"Those were salt mines, Filius, and you were there, too."

"Well, you never know, there might be salt down there." The two old teachers grinned at each other.

Snape rolled his eyes. "If you two are quite done?"

Luna had been carefully watching the interaction of the teachers, never having seen them in a social situation. Despite the snarking there seemed to be genuine respect between them all, it seemed they used the mutual sniping as a means of relaxation, a way to relieve tension even in the most dire of moments. She followed her teachers to the second floor Girls' lavatory, deep in thought.

Silvanus Kettleburn was the first through the door and started swearing as soon as he did. Septima Vector, who had taken up position next to Luna, swiftly put her hands over girl's ears.

"Silvanus! Really! There are pupils present!"

Myrtle coughed. "Not quite a pu-" Two hands covered her ears and she looked back to see the Grey Lady floating serenely behind her, both her ghostly hands firmly on Myrtle's ears. Any protest Myrtle might have formulated was stilled by the look the Lady gave her.

Minerva ran up to the door. "Harry, Ron and Hermione aren't in the Gryffindor Tower!"

Kettleburn let out another oath. "Well, it seems they came to the same conclusion as Miss Lovegood, without the good sense of getting a teacher to help them…"

Filius rolled his eyes. "Gryffindors." There were affirming nods from everyone but Minerva, Rolanda and Hagrid, though all three looked slightly embarrassed.

"Well, change of plans." Minerva said briskly. "Silvanus, Filius, Severus, you three go down there, Septima, Bathseda make sure no otherstudents get down there." She put a gimlet glare on Luna who looked unconcerned. "Rolanda, Charity, Milady, would you be so kind as to take Miss Lovegood to the Ravenclaw tower?"

"I'd like to go down." Hagrid said quietly.

Kettleburn smiled. "Very well, we can use a strong arm. Come along lads! 'Tis to Glory we steer!" He gestured over the hole and nodded. "Air is breathable. Smells bad, though."

Kettleburn settled on the edge of the hole and hoisted his artificial legs in place and grinned. "Half a minute after me. Don't get stuck, Rubeus!"

Half a minute after Kettleburn went down, Flitwick followed.

"I'll cast a Grasso on you, Hagrid, and you go first, call if you get stuck and I'll follow slowly and try and get you loose." Snape said quietly.

Septima Vector, her hands now on Luna's shoulder, looked in amazement as the potions master carefully applied the greasing spell. Hagrid sat on the entrance and wriggled, hoisting himself over the middle of the hole and then let go. He went down with a 'gloop'. Snape grimaced and glared at Minerva.

"You owe me a set of new robes after this." He said dryly and moved agilely down the hole.

Minerva sighed. "He always needs the last word… "

Septima grinned. "We wouldn't want him any other way. Milady, I think it's time for the girls to go…"

Myrtle was about to protest when the Bloody Baron floated into the room, and down the hole, nodding silently at the Lady, who ignored him. Myrtle pouted as the position she had wanted to assume was filled in by the older, more experienced ghost.

Minerva smiled sadly at Septima. "Ghost Liaison set up. I'll go and see Molly and Arthur." She squared her shoulders and left the room to face the broken-hearted parents.