Out of Time
Chapter 10: The Mind of a Killer
1865
Kenshin stood on the bridge, gazing out over the still waters at the crescent moon. It took him a moment to realize that he wasn't alone. A man stood next to him, leaning casually against the rail. As Kenshin's eyes slowly adjusted to the dark, he recognized the figure beside him. Sanosuke. Kenshin blinked a couple of times and rubbed his eyes, but Sano was still solidly there.
"Sano?" Kenshin asked.
His friend turned and grinned at him. "The moon's somethin' tonight, isn't it?"
Kenshin nodded silently. He couldn't think of words to express how relieved he was that the fighter was alright. He'd been worrying about his friend since the fall, and had been privately blaming himself for anything that might have happened to him.
"You okay, Kenshin? You seem kinda quiet."
Kenshin smiled, and leaned against the rail beside him. "I'm alright, that I am. I was just worried about you. When you didn't come out of the water…"
Sano just grinned. "What? You thought I was dead or something? You think a fall like that could kill me? Didn't last time."
Kenshin blinked up at him. "Last time?" he asked. "What do you mean?"
The fighter shrugged. "Doesn't matter. That's not why we're out here, right?" He sent Kenshin a quick look. "It's not why you're here, is it?"
The redhead shook his head. This wasn't making any sense to him. "Why are we here?" He looked around, suddenly taking in his surroundings. The peaceful waters were gone. So was the bridge for that matter, and Sano. Kenshin was alone in the middle of a forest. But where was he? The area looked so familiar… He stood silently as snow fell gently around him.
And he remembered.
Otsu.
There were footsteps. Someone was coming for him. Kenshin tensed, ready for anything. Perhaps not quite ready for the form that materialized from the trees. He blinked his wide, startled eyes. "Saito?"
The tall, lean wolf stepped into the clearing, dressed in his dark blue police uniform, a lit cigarette hanging from his mouth. There was an animalistic glint in his eyes. "So, Battousai. Shall we finish this?" He threw the cigarette down and drew his sword, moving into the Gatotsu stance.
Kenshin was frozen in place. "Saito…" he whispered. "Why are you here in Otsu? Why now?"
Saito sneered at him, his amber eyes narrowing. "Why not? You've gotten weak, Battousai, because you hide behind your pathetic no-kill oath and that useless sword."
"Saito—"
"Fight me! Stop hiding and fight. Here. Now. This is your haunting ground, Battousai. Where your demons come out to play. This is where you need to fight if you want the win to matter."
"In Otsu?" This was too much.
"No." Saito growled. "In your mind." The time for words was over. The former Shinsengumi leader was in motion, moving so quickly that in the soft moonlight his clothing blurred to a pale blue, and he was almost the third unit leader again.
The former hitokiri barely managed to dodge the blade. However, he readied himself for battou-jutsu before Saito had turned. As Saito bore down on him again, Kenshin drew his blade, moving at an amazing speed. Both came out with nothing more than scratches.
Saito smirked, brushing the blood from his face. "Better."
"Why are you doing this, Saito?" Kenshin asked darkly, prepared for the next blow. "You aren't one of my demons."
"Perhaps, but you're holding one of them in your hand."
Kenshin's eyes turned to his drawn blade. A true katana. He paled, feeling sick. "No."
The tall man was in position again, his expression serious. "Fight."
"No…" Kenshin's voice was barely a whisper as he dropped the blade. "I... can't…"
The older man scowled. "You can't do anything, then. How can you protect anyone when you can't even face the demons of your past? You deserve to die!"
Kenshin didn't deny it. He closed his eyes and sheathed his sword. He would not be a hitokiri again. He would not use a katana. He would die first. It was better that way.
Saito's blade bit into his shoulder, but without the force Kenshin had expected. Something had blocked the blow. His eyes snapped open to find Saito gone, and a figure slumped on the ground before him, turning the snow beneath her into red slush.
His heart stopped. Everything seemed to stop.
"Tomoe…" he whispered brokenly, falling to his knees in the snow beside her still form. Gently, he turned her, so her face was out of the snow.
It wasn't Tomoe.
"Kaoru…no!"
Kenshin jerked awake, sweat pouring down his face. For one terrifying moment, he had no idea where he was. Everything around him was black. Finally he began making out shapes in the room around him. Stacks of books. A futon. A fresh gi and hakama that Okami must have laid out earlier.
Okami. That's right. This was his room in the Kohagi Inn that Okami had rebuilt. It was Bakumatsu.
Kaoru-dono would not be here. She was safe. It was just a dream.
Kenshin rubbed his eyes with one hand, brushing some of the stinging sweat from his eyes. Perhaps not only sweat. His hand was shaking.
A dream. That's all it was. But it had felt too real. Tentatively, he felt under the bandages on his shoulder. He swallowed hard, running his fingers along an old scar very near his new wound. One of the only scars he couldn't remember getting. Exactly where Saito's blade had just struck him…
It wasn't real. Couldn't have been. He looked around the room for support. Again his eyes fell on the futon, and Kenshin realized exactly where he was. The wall solidly supporting his back. The sakabatou safely in his hands.
Kenshin slumped forward, letting the sakabatou support a body he seemed to have lost control over. He couldn't deal with this anymore.
Because the nightmare he was living scared him worse than the one from which he'd just awoken.
1878
Sanosuke and Yahiko could tell something was happening even before they'd entered the marketplace. The people were crowding, forming a tight mob around some display. Sano already knew who would be at the center of the crowd, and by the look on Yahiko's face, he knew as well. There were no police in sight, although Sano was sure that wouldn't hold much longer. The two began forcing their way through the crowd. Sano pushed in front just in time to see Battousai draw his katana.
"NO!" he shouted. He could hear Kaoru cry Kenshin's name out as well, but it was no use. The moment the youth had drawn his sword the fight was over, and the huge man lay bleeding on the ground. Sano grimaced, not wanting to imagine how they would explain this death to the police. Then a worse thought struck him. "How are we gonna explain this to Kenshin?" he whispered. "Knowing that baka, he'll treat it as having broken his no-kill oath and he'll run again."
Yahiko stared at him. "It's not like Kenshin killed the guy. It's not his fault."
Sano stared blankly at the boy for a moment before he remembered that as far as Yahiko knew, this man wasn't Kenshin. "Yeah… right…" he mumbled out.
"But what if the police think Kenshin did it?" Yahiko added thoughtfully. "I mean, they look a lot alike."
Sano didn't get a chance to answer. Battousai had sheathed his weapon and was walking swiftly toward them.
The crowd behind Sano pushed back.
"I am sorry, Sanosuke, but I did not break my promise," Battousai said softly. "He threatened Kaoru-dono. I had to draw my sword."
"You killed him," Sano hissed.
Battousai just stared with that disturbingly emotionless mask in place. "So much faith in me," he finally said.
"Faith! You—"
"Broke some ribs, probably. He should see a doctor." Having effectively silenced Sano, the youth effortlessly slipped through the crowd, even as the fallen man began to stir.
Sano looked between Battousai's retreating form and his victim. Then he noticed Kaoru standing wide-eyed and alone. "Yahiko," he snapped, "Make sure Jou-chan's okay. I need to talk to Himura."
Before Yahiko could protest, Sano was off, shoving his way through the crowd.
"Wait a minute!" Yahiko yelled after him, spotting Kaoru's purchases. "That means I have to carry everything!"
Sano ignored him and kept moving. He spotted the redhead just at the edge of the marketplace. "Himura!" he called.
The boy stopped without turning. Sano pushed through the last few people and finally caught up. He moved to face his friend. "I don't get it," he said, a little out of breath. "How did you do it? Kenshin only has one sakabatou, and I was hoping it was still with him."
Battousai wouldn't look at him, instead watching a couple of police officers finally appear to break up the crowd. "I still have my katana," he said softly. "But it's a simple matter to flip the blade."
Sano stared at him as his words sunk in. "You flipped… But why? You're Hitokiri Battousai. Why would you even think to flip it?"
The youth looked at him with tired, haunted eyes. "So, I'm Hitokiri Battousai again," he said softly. "That's all it took." He laughed a little bitterly. "That's all it ever takes. Watch my blade, and make me your sword."
Sano grimaced. "That's not what I meant, Himura. You aren't just a sword. You're a person just like I am."
Battousai's dark eyes flashed as his mask began to fail him. "I am nothing like you, Sagara. I am a sword. A weapon to be used. I just wondered…" He faltered there for a moment.
"Wondered what?"
"How it would feel for once to be a blade that doesn't kill." The boy turned from a silent Sano and continued walking toward the Aoi-ya.
Neither of them noticed the wolf watching from the shadows.
Author's note: Thanks again for reading, and definitely thanks for the reviews!
Speaking of reviewers…
MZ. AMbER EYES: Actually, I used to like Kaoru waaay more, but I've had to watch Trust and Betrayal a few times to write this story and another I'm working on. It's funny. Each time I watch it I like Tomoe more and more. I think I'm at the point where I almost like them equally. As to Kenshin's choice… It was never really a comparison for him. Tomoe died before he had Kaoru. He's loved them both, in his own way. But Battousai has only just met Kaoru. He doesn't know what to think of her yet! And he only just lost his wife a few months ago…
WhiteRabbit5: Glad I made you dwell on the sword ban. - - laughs - - That's cool. And thanks for catching the grammar mistake. I don't have a beta, so I do all the editing and such myself. It helps when reviewers catch my oopsies!
Animeinsomniac: - - blushes - - Wow… I'm totally flattered. Thanks. I don't really know what else to say…
Babika: Glad it cheered you up!
Autumn's Fire: I always love to hear when people like this story who don't usually like this type. Makes me feel like I've accomplished something. Thanks!
NightOwl123: Now, what makes you think Kenshin's getting out of things that easily?
Sailor-Earth13: Got the review. That's weird about your history… I'm glad you liked the chapter!
To all my reviewers: Thanks for the thoughtful reviews. I hope the story continues to live up to expectations. I get that terrified fluttery butterflies feeling every time I post the new chapter. Nice to know they've all worked so far. Thanks again!
I need to go now. Just picked up my copy of Seisouhen: Director's Cut (AKA Samurai X: Reflections: Director's Cut), with about 40 extra minutes and I'm dying to watch it. (YAY!)
Sayonara!