Hello. This is Watari. I normally don't feel that I have very much to complain about, but Light prodded me and prodded me (he prodded everyone with a malicious amount of enthusiasm, actually) to fill out one of these rant sheets, so I finally agreed, just to make him stop bothering me about it.

And so I thought and thought and thought and thought and finally I know what I would like to bring up as a small issue I had.

Ukita's ears resemble that of an ape. Besides maybe the fact that he smokes, Ukita's ears are the first thing I noticed upon meeting him, and the only thing I really remembered about him after he died.

And really, the legend of his ears died with him, because now that he's dead and buried, no one would believe it if they were told that there used to be a man in the NPA who had small, round ears sticking out of his skull like a primate. It's pretty much the whole "seeing is believing" deal with him, and photographs just don't capture the full extent of the emotions evoked from the sight of him.

I'm sure he used to be made fun of as a child. Of course, if I were a kid, I'd be making fun of him, too, but now I am obviously much more mature than that. Now I just calmly serve him tea, while at the same time calling him inappropriate names in my head. But do you ever see me saying them out loud? No. Never. But you know all those times you see me smile for no apparent reason? Well, that probably means I was mentally insulting/making fun of someone on the task force (or occasionally Roger, for whatever reason).

:)

Well, maybe his mother was a monkey, or something. Some kind of primate?

Or a Neanderthal, at the very least. Even just someone who looks like a Neanderthal?

Not that I would ever ask. I'd rather just stick to smiling at people.

All that being said, I do feel it necessary to reiterate that I did actually like Ukita, and it is a shame that he died. The loss of life is never something that should be looked at in a positive light, be it the death of a human or a primate. Or the death of anything, really.

Thoughts?

-Watari

Thanks go to Stormygio for suggesting this idea! She's awesome. :D

Whoa, I just looked at the Death Note fanfiction archive for the first time in like, a month. The Human Whose Name Is Written In This Fanfiction by Gen Duruk. If you want to laugh, you should read it. :D (Link on my profile)

Hope you enjoyed, and thank you for reading! Review? Please? I love feedback! Farewell~

~Ratt Kazamata, 11/27/2011