AN: Wohow! This story reached the 100 reviews mark, after only 9 chapters. You guys are so awesome, thank you so, so, sooooo much! *hugs and kisses everyone*
And I've got to say, I really enjoy how you all seem to like Dancup (That ship name stays, I like it). Because at this point I can admit: It wasn't originally planned like this, and took a lot of thinking and pondering on my part until we changed that bit. So I'm really glad that you like it how it is now. Means it was worth the effort. :)
Another important thing: The planned hiatus gets pushed back yet another week. This chapter is ridiculously long already, but the next is about to become a mammoth. So it's going to get split. Meaning: The last chapter of part 1 will get posted on the 15th June, and we start again with part 2 on 20th July.
This chapter's title also comes from a song from Anastasia. It's from the end-credits song At The Beginning by Richard Marx & Donna Lewis, and it really has some very interesting lines. You'll definitely read more of them here.
. o O o .
Chapter 9: We Were Strangers, Starting Out On A Journey
That morning, Astrid woke to the sounds of the morning birdsong coming in through her window. The dim autumn sunshine sketched patterns of light on her wall, and she wasn't entirely sure that she wasn't still dreaming. For what felt like an eternity, she stared at the painted ceiling of her bedroom and tried, not for the first time, to grasp what had happened the day before. There had been so much, and it still felt weirdly surreal. Meeting Hiccup at the stables, those precious minutes they shared in that quiet room, and how easily he seemed to fit in with Daniel and Eret... It all seemed like a dream.
As if of its own accord, her hand wandered to her chest again. She chuckled shakily at the strange sensation, at this warm connection that seemed to glow brighter the more she thought about him. Absentmindedly, she wondered when she would see him again. Hopefully at some point today. And, equally hopefully, they would get the chance to talk in private. She had so many questions, ranging from the serious to the inane. She wanted to know everything, from why he'd been on the road for two years and what he'd been looking for while he'd been out there, to his favourite colour and where he was ticklish.
Of course, the likelihood of getting to actually ask such questions was minimal. Yesterday had been an aberration with the amount of time that she'd managed to duck her minders. Silly and irreverent they might be, but the twins took that part of their jobs seriously, especially since last spring. It was rare that she managed to carve out five minutes out from under their watch... which, of course, made her wonder if she'd had a little help yesterday.
She made a face at the ceiling. "All-Father, I don't want to sound greedy..." she began, but trailed off. What, she was going to ask for more help? Odin and Frigga had already eased her path to a man whose soul now beat in time with her own heart. Clearly, the rest was up to her. But how she would manage to pull that off was a bit beyond her, she had to admit.
But even that realisation wasn't able to darken her mood. Last night's joy was still bubbling through her, and when Rachel finally came to help her dress for the family breakfast, Astrid greeted her cheerfully.
"Good morning, Ruff," she said with a happy smile. "Isn't it a lovely day? The sky is blue, the sun is shining, and–" She'd been about to wave toward the high windows that led out over the green hills around Lake Vola behind the castle when she caught Rachel's amused expression.
"I guess the feast wasn't as bad as you'd expected?" her maidservant stated dryly, lips quirked up into a smirk and arms crossed in front of her. "Did anything special happen that put you in such a good mood? Or something that's worth mentioning in general? Some interesting bits of gossip to spread? I so loved your description of Grand Duke Spitelout's face when he realised those were his pigeons last summer. What was it again? 'He looked like a cross between an overfed pig and a burst cake'?"
Astrid's heart sank a little at Ruff's words. She was grateful for the fact that Ruff had stepped behind her to detangle and unknot the simple plait Astrid had put her hair in before going to bed. Would there be any gossip about her and Hiccup? There had been no reactions last night, but… Had anyone seen either of them disappearing into the other room...? Or even just seen him emerge from it after she and Eret had left it? Or had anyone noticed how… how meaningful their small interactions had been?
Trying to sound casual, she said, "No, there was nothing worth mentioning. Unless you include Countess Whitevale's attempts at matchmaking as interesting. Did you know that Alicia apparently is 'fond of animals'? I always was under the impression that she's scared of anything bigger than a fly."
"You don't say," Ruff said, chuckling lightly, and Astrid sighed inwardly in relief. Diversion successful. "But no, that doesn't count. It would only be worth mentioning if she managed a night without advertising those poor girls like livestock. There really was nothing else? How boring."
Biting her lip, Astrid considered how much more she could say while Ruff was busy lacing up the back of her dress. There was so much that had happened, but she couldn't say anything. Except…
"Well, Eret's new squire made for a good start in his new job," she said lightly. Ruff would have heard about Hiccup anyway, and her not talking about their major public interaction would only raise her suspicions. "He directly interfered with Daniel's stupid law – without knowing about it, I should add."
Behind her, Ruff paused. A heartbeat later, she continued, sounding slightly anxious. "Uhh... elaborate on that? What happened? I mean, you're obviously okay... but, well... Damn, don't tell me he lost a hand right away. That would be awfully inconvenient for Eret, wouldn't it?"
Astrid grimaced, and shook her head, glad that Ruff would think she was only worried on Eret's behalf. "No, none of that. And it wasn't that bad, really. It was only an accident, Daniel warned him off, and that was it. Besides, the boy actually seems to be all right. Daniel invited him to sit with us, and, apparently, he knows more about architecture than you, me, Eret, and your brother together."
"Well, then he should be safe," Ruff snickered. Resuming her work, she said, "Your brother wouldn't risk losing such a conversation partner."
Astrid giggled a bit at that, if shakily. "You're probably right. And I mentioned it because it was more or less the only actual gossip-worthy bit that happened. No, wait. Eret crashed the formal gathering a little when he asked me for a dance and at some point some other couples joined us. But aside from that it really wasn't that much of an interesting event, all things considered."
The understatement of the year, but, hopefully, Ruff would never know.
. o O o .
Once Astrid was appropriately dressed in a light blue silken dress, Tuff escorted her through the busy corridors toward the breakfast room.
The very room in which she and Hiccup had kissed last night.
"Is everything all right?" Tuff asked, sounding confused. She'd stopped a few steps in front of the door, wide eyes staring as the rest of her body refused to move on. It was the official entrance to this room – the broad double door that led to the front part of the room and not the hidden servants' entrance that was closer to the kitchens, the one she and Hiccup had come through last night – but the prospect of entering this room and having to keep her composure was daunting.
And yet, she had no choice. Swallowing, she raised one hand to her chest, and the already familiar warm glow made her feel more confident. She could do this. For his sake, she could act as if nothing had happened. As if she was still the same person as yesterday. Taking another second to calm herself, she pushed the well-practised mask of a composed smile back onto her face. "Of course," she replied, batting away his concerns, and stepped through the door as soon as Tuff opened it for her. Her gaze flickered immediately to the back of the room, to where they'd kissed and their souls and lives had become one, and to the cupboard behind which Hiccup had hidden. She still could hardly believe that Eret hadn't noticed him standing there. But then, it had been pretty dark, and Eret had obviously not expected to find anyone but her.
With much effort, she forced her eyes away from that spot and her thoughts away from those memories. Instead, she tried to focus on the scene in front of her. Her father, Daniel, and all three Erets were already sitting around the table – laden with a basket full of light bread rolls, small pots of butter, honey and fruit jam, and plates with cheese and cold meat – and Astrid tried hard to keep her mask in place as they all looked up at her entering the room. It felt weird to so with these men, but letting her emotions show was not an option.
"Good morning, Milords," she greeted the men with a curtsey, and sat down on the chair next to Daniel. He and Eret greeted her with warm if tired smiles which made her guess their night had been quite a bit shorter than hers. Her father nodded, equally tired, while the Grand Duke's expression broke into a friendly grin.
"Good morning, Astrid. As always, your sight is a blessing for these tired eyes."
She accepted the compliment with a polite nod and was about to reply, when Eret the Elder beat her to it.
"Yes, yes, the girl's a pretty sight in that expensive dress," the old man grumbled. "I only wish a sight like hers would rejuvenate my back instead of my loins. Honestly, this bed in the room you gave me was hard as a rock. Poison for my bones and joints, I'm telling you. Poison! The offer was well-meant, Osmond, but you'll have to accept that I'll relocate to my townhouse until I return home. From what I remember, the beds there are more comfortable."
The King only replied with a grunt, indicating that he'd heard and accepted the words, and Astrid had to hide a grimace. The castle was brimming with guests who'd come for Eret's accolade and for the upcoming Midwinter festivities. From what little she remembered regarding the planning, the fact that Eret the Elder had been offered a room in the castle was only thanks to his grandson giving up the room that would have gone to him as the guest of honour. Eret had chosen to spend the night on a couch in Daniel's quarters, as the two friends would have talked for hours anyway. Sometimes, the tone in which the old goat spoke to his King surprised Astrid – his insulting tone about the accommodations in the castle, not the comments about her. Those didn't surprise her anymore. But then the old man had been her own grandfather's friend and advisor, and an honorary uncle to her father. A relationship like that apparently didn't change just because the boy he'd seen grow up became King. And in most cases nobody bothered to call him on his oftentimes inappropriate tone anymore anyway.
Caught up in her thoughts and not really listening to the old man's complaints anymore, she reached for a roll and a pot of honey. Every now and then, her gaze shifted to the other end of the room again, and the memory of Hiccup holding her in his arms made a warm smile spread across her face. Oh, what would she give if she could go back to those minutes, to feel his embrace right now, his lips on hers, and his warmth. Being here in this room again but under these completely different circumstances only heightened the sense of surrealness of last night's events. Lightly touching that spot on her chest, she knew that it all had happened, but at the same time, it still felt like nothing but a dream. If only she could be sure to soon see him again and to be able to talk to him...
Suddenly, a light dazzled her. Astrid blinked, and realised that it was the reflection of the sun on Eret's knife as he deliberately tried to catch her attention. She looked up to see him questioningly raising an eyebrow at her. Remembering how easily he was able to read her, she gave him a nondescript smile, and then put in some effort to school her expression. She couldn't let any of her emotions or thoughts show.
Still distracted, she was about to take a first bite of her breakfast when her father's voice drew her attention. She'd deliberately ignored their conversation, mostly due to the old goat, but now that he raised his voice to address Eret, she couldn't fail to notice his words. And the topic would have drawn her attention anyway.
"A word about your squire, Eret," the King said in a serious voice, and Astrid momentarily froze mid-movement. Her hand half-raised to her mouth, she felt her heart skipping a painful beat as she tried to think of any reason why her father would want to talk about Hiccup of all people. Did he know after all? Had someone noticed and told him? She felt as if she would know if something had happened to him, but...
"I know we talked about him yesterday already," her father said, and Astrid noticed how all men around her perked up their heads at this topic. "And I haven't changed my mind, don't worry. On the contrary, now that I've seen him… Well, I'm glad you took the boy in. And I'm sure he'll be good for you, too. Especially when it comes to formal behaviour, from what I've heard."
Astrid returned her eyes to her plate, and tried not to show how eagerly she absorbed every word her father had said. Even the King knew who Hiccup was? Was he someone one ought to know then?
"Thank you, your Majesty. Your approval means a lot, to both him and me," Eret replied relieved, drowning out his father's and Daniel's low chuckling with his sure voice. Astrid pushed her internal contemplations aside to further listen to what they might say.
The King nodded, but before he could say any more, Eret the Elder interjected. "And what about my approval?" he sneered in his usual unpleasant tone. "Nobody asked me. But just so you know, I do not approve of your choice, lad. That twig can't be any good at fighting, he'll only be a hindrance to you. And where did he come from anyway? Surely you could have found a better squire among our vassals, maybe Dogsbreath of Greyhound. His grandfather fought well for us; held the bridge for an hour, giving us time to regroup, and lived to tell the tale! And his mother's line is just as distinguished. But your boy there?" He shook his head. "No. He surely comes from a bad breed. Just look at him! That's a weak bloodstock, as scrawny and thin as he is."
Astrid was used to the insulting words of Eret the Elder, but suddenly it had become a lot more difficult to stay calm. She was hard-pressed to keep herself from interjecting that Hiccup was anything but weak. A part of her wanted nothing more than to throw into the old goat's face how she'd felt his strength last night, his wiry muscles that had held her so tight and sure. But she fought down the urge. She took a small bite off her roll to give her face something to do while she worked to appear unperturbed – and only slowly noticed the change in atmosphere around her.
All the other men had become strangely quiet, a practically tangible awkward silence covering them that didn't make any sense to Astrid.
"So, I'm right?" Eret the Elder kept ranting. "He's nothing but a peasant after all? Or the grandchild of one of those yellow-livered captains that we gave a county to, despite hiding in the back ranks? Or is it even worse? Is he your bastard, Son? Did he crawl out of a Temple and now thinks he can benefit from his sire's name? Bah, that would fit, I thought he looked familiar somehow. You should–"
"He's Valka's son," the Grand Duke interrupted his father with a dangerously calm voice that betrayed the rage beneath. Astrid stowed that name away in her mind for later use, unable to react in any way. It wasn't just her own father. Everyone in this room seemed to know what Valka's son meant, everyone but her. But not everyone seemed to be happy about this revelation.
"WHAT?" the old goat shrieked, and was on his feet before Astrid knew what had happened. Behind him, the chair toppled to the ground with the sound of delicate wood cracking. His face was a mask of anger, turning dangerously red, with his eyes blazing and spit flying as he went on. "That scrawny little weakling? That son of a failure? Bah!" He turned toward his son, one finger raised accusingly. "This is all your fault. You said both of your sister's suitors were equally good choices. You convinced me that letting her choose between them would avoid any political consequences. But I never should have listened to you. BAH! I should have known the girl would choose wrong, just as silly as every other woman. And you!" he turned toward his grandson. "I thought you had better sense then that! This is about your future. You should have considered building alliances when picking a squire. But no, you're apparently just as stupid as everyone else. Bah. BAH! I wish I was still the head of my own House. I would make sure you marry this girl here before you could make any other stupid decisions on your own." He snatched up his cane and went to the door. "Have the kitchens send something to my chambers. I'll eat privately. I can't stomach the arrant stupidity in here any longer!"
Long since used to old Eret's tendency to rant and spit without a way to stop him, everyone else had stayed quiet until the door slammed behind him. Once he'd left, an oppressive silence fell over the room that left nearly everyone staring at their plates in discomfort.
Astrid, however, used the quiet moments to filter all the information she'd just picked out of the elderly man's words. Hiccup's mother was a woman named Valka. And she was the Grand Duke's sister. Of course, Eret had introduced Hiccup as his cousin, but… Slowly, she shook her head as she processed it all. She hadn't thought that they were that closely related. Her eyes widened as another realisation hit her. If Hiccup's mother was the daughter of Eret the Elder… Then the old man was Hiccup's grandfather, too. How was it possible that he was so closely related to one of the most powerful Houses in the whole of the realm and yet held no power himself? Being deliberately kept in the dark about any political matters could be so inconvenient.
The silence was broken by Eret II uncomfortably clearing his throat. "Well. That was... horrible," the Grand Duke stated, and rubbed his temples. "And that's not even taking into account that we'd agreed on keeping the boy's identity a secret from the old man. Gods, I only hope Father won't pester the boy with one of his tirades, he's been through enough." There was mumbling agreement from the other men while Astrid still stared at her plate, unmoving, as her mind seemed to race in circles.
Who was Hiccup? He obviously was not just a simple stable boy, but that much she'd learned last night already. And he'd said that he held nothing but an empty title, but… which title? If he was the grandson of Eret the Elder, the direct nephew of the Grand Duke of Eastervale… No, nothing made sense. He couldn't be this powerless, not with relatives like this.
Without thinking about it, her gaze roamed over the paintings and portraits hanging on the walls around her to land on that of her mother. She didn't often think of her – one couldn't really miss what one had never known – but right now, she wished she was still alive. She wished she had someone to talk to, someone who could answer her questions not only about local up-to-date gossip, but about more far-reaching connections, too. Surely, her mother, the independent Lady Brenna, would have been willing and able to answer her questions, unlike her many governesses. They were more concerned in carving her into the form of the perfect princess, proper, decorous and empty-headed, than teaching her about the state of the kingdom.
"So, what is on the agenda for the day for everyone?" came the Grand Duke's barely concealed attempt at brightening the mood a few minutes later.
Out of the corner of her eye, Astrid saw how her brother shrugged. "Well, I'd like to see the horses you brought," he said. "There's nothing else to do anyway, and the sooner I might get accustomed to a new stallion, the earlier I can return to my men in Westhill. I hope to set off shortly after the Midwinter festivities."
The Grand Duke nodded. "That should be manageable. You know your way around our horses, after all. Getting used to a new one shouldn't take all that long."
"Right. Let's head over there directly," Eret suggested, standing up already. "I dearly need some exercises and fresh air."
"Weren't you just on the road for five days?" asked Daniel, amusement clear in his voice. "Seriously, can't you sit still for even half a day? Read a book, or so?"
"Heh. No, I'll have enough time to read once I'm old. Hopefully, that will keep me from giving unsolicited and insulting advice to my descendants that they're not heartless enough." Eret shook his head in annoyance, and headed for the door. "I know that Grandfather was the old King's political adviser, but I'm starting to wonder if he cut out his heart, instead of his eye, for a drink from Mimir's Well." Eret II scoffed in grudging agreement, and Eret III opened the door.
"Aren't you coming, too, Swanja?" he called back as Astrid made no attempts to get up and follow him and her brother. She threw a glance back at her still barely touched breakfast, but decided that she wasn't hungry enough to stay behind. The idea of going to the stables, to the familiar and soothing company of horses, was too tempting.
. o O o .
"Hoy. Is she ready yet?"
Daniel's voice echoed from the front room over to where Astrid stood in front of the floor-length mirror in her dressing room. His words served to heighten her own restlessness, and she let out a suppressed sigh. Rachel grumbled something about royal impatience under her breath, and kept on fixing the many cords on her back. This time, Astrid didn't need to sneak away and toward the stables in secret, so she'd grudgingly agreed to change into a more suitable dress. Even though it meant she had to wait even longer. She couldn't wait to finally go to the stables, to feel the comfortable familiarity and simplicity that always overcame her there. It would be a welcome change to this morning's tension.
"Not yet," Tuff replied in his usual slightly bored tone. "But Ruff already cursed the amount of laces on her dress, so it can't be long now."
"I'd like to see you bind all these Lokied knots and loops every time," Ruff called back, her exasperation only partially humorous. "There, it's done."
Happy that they would finally be going now, Astrid left her dressing room to join her brother. Daniel stood near the door, wearing rather simple trousers and an unadorned though still splendidly tailored shirt and jacket over a pair of riding boots. One would think that might have been enough of an indication already.
"Oh, no, not again," Tuff whined when he saw her and recognised her dress as one of her usual riding outfits; A deep blue dress made of sturdy linen, barely adorned with anything but a few simple stitchings, and with long sleeves that would protect her from the autumn chill. It was completed by a set of light calfskin-gloves and the unmistakable sounds of her own riding boots on the stone floor. "Don't tell me I have to walk all the way out to those stables again. Seriously, wasn't the hike through the entire castle yesterday enough already?"
Daniel gave Tuff an amused look at where her manservant lounged sidewise on one of the cushioned chairs around a delicate tea table in the corner of the room. "Best not overwork the poor man," he said with a barely hidden smirk. "I don't think your services will be needed today, Timothy. Eret and I will be with her, so you can have the day off. Although, I do hope that you don't use your time to play yet another prank on one or the other of our honoured guests. Like, say… Sir Eret the Elder, for example. The old goat is fuming already as he is."
Astrid couldn't hide her smirk at this barely hidden challenge, or the look the twins shared. "What, in Loki's name are you thinking of us, Highness?" Tuff inquired in mock indignation, just as his sister threw in, "As if we would ever do such a thing."
"Exactly…" Daniel murmured.
. o O o .
When Daniel and Astrid reached the castle's entrance, Eret was already waiting for them. He, too, was dressed in practical and comfortable riding gear, and carried a heavy-looking basket over one arm.
"Ah, excellent," Daniel grinned, and pointed at the basket. "You were able to talk Heather into packing us a picnic?"
Eret smirked. "Yeah. It wasn't that hard, as it's literally her job to keep you two fed. And, conveniently, your guests as well. Besides, they have a lot of leftovers down there from last night. Would be a shame to let all these pastries go to waste."
"Indeed," Daniel agreed, and lifted the lid to pull out some food directly. He handed each Astrid and Eret a few pieces.
Astrid, who'd practically skipped breakfast, ate the first bite eagerly, but couldn't resist teasing the men a little.
"Didn't you just eat breakfast? How can you be hungry again already? Just wait, before long you'll be as vast at Fyrir Alvin."
Daniel and Eret paused to share a strange look. "Well," Eret began hesitantly. "Since I know us, this is not just an in-between snack, but also lunch. And, to my defence, it's not only for the three of us. I guess Hiccup hasn't eaten much so far, so this is his breakfast, lunch, and probably dinner, too."
"Hiccup?" Astrid couldn't help the small pause in her steps that nearly caused her to stumble. She glared at a small rock as if it was to blame while countless thoughts whirled around her head. Hiccup! They would meet Hiccup? Was he at the stables? Would she really see him again in only a few minutes? Her heart started to beat faster at that thought, and she was glad when Daniel inquired after him, too, and drew the attention away from her.
"You left him at the stables?" her brother asked, sounding indignant and growing moroes as he went on. "Why? You yourself said he's no ordinary servant, much less some stable boy. He surely has the right of better accommodations, at least for being your squire, if nothing else. We have quarters for the other squires, he could live there for the time being. Or you could even claim that you 'need his assistance', and accommodate him somewhere closer to you. Or what about your family's townhouse? I understand that you didn't want to return there last night, but, surely, he could have–"
Eret interrupted him by raising a hand. "Believe me, this is the best solution," he said with a gloomy expression. "We talked about it beforehand, Father, Hiccup, and I, and we agreed that Hiccup would stay with the horses. On the one hand, we would have wanted someone to do that anyway, and he agreed to it, no matter whether he would become my squire or Father's new stable master. At least as long as we stay here at the castle. And on the other hand… Well, I wouldn't want to house him with the other squires. Grandfather is right on one point after all. He's no fighter, not buff or strong like some of the others. And you know how young men can be if they think they found the weakest link in their chain. No, that wouldn't be a good idea. And the same goes for our townhouse, if for different reasons. I wouldn't want Hiccup anywhere near the old goat." Daniel winced, and gave a grudging nod of agreement, as Astrid felt her own anger rise at the mere thought of Eret I screaming at Hiccup. Seeing Daniel's nod, Eret continued, "As for me needing his assistance… Well, I've managed to dress myself for over eighteen years now, and I would prefer to keep doing so, thank you very much. Besides, where exactly would you suggest he could have slept last night? There is only one couch in your rooms, and I don't fancy sharing that tiny bit of space with someone else. I like my cousin, but not that much. Which reminds me... Please tell me the couch was… erm… safe."
Daniel gave an exasperated snort. "Safe as in clean? Yeah, don't worry. Believe it or not, but I'm not that busy that I can't make the way to the temple on my own. I don't need for one of the Ástir to come to my rooms instead."
"Are you telling me that strategically placed mirror on the opposite wall actually is simply for checking clothes?" Eret laughed, and shook his head. "I could have sworn it served a better purpose than simply showing dressed people." Daniel gave Eret a flat look, but Eret ignored him and cheerfully continued. "Anyway, I'm not complaining. It's still a nicer room than what I normally would be able to expect as the juniormost knight in the kingdom, regardless of who my father is."
"That much is true," Daniel said, musing. "Right now, the other knights in my retinue are packed six to a room and whining about it."
"Like I said, much nicer," Eret commented. "Although, while you've got great taste in furniture–"
Daniel interrupted, his tone syrupy sweet. "Thank you! Even though I've noticed that your tastes, if I remember correctly, run towards something I'd expect to see in one of your family's stud farms – specifically, in the barns."
"Neeeeigh, I must protest!" Eret whinnied with a cheerful smirk. "But back to the point. A man of taste and refinement such as yourself could use more paintings of Ástir at work on the walls. Maybe a nice tasteful mural of the Eighty-One Acts of Bliss?"
Astrid giggled as Daniel choked.
Eret grinned and said, "I could have one commissioned for you! Imagine coming home from campaign and finding it on your walls."
Daniel glared at Eret. "You wouldn't dare."
Astrid snorted and Daniel looked at her. "What?"
"You do remember who you're talking to, right? Your almost-brother Eret, the man who has no shame when it comes to a bet or dare?"
Eret chuckled evilly and Daniel looked exaggeratedly worried; she wondered which incident he was remembering. There were, after all, so many to choose from...
As Eret continued to cackle, Daniel gave him a side-eyed look. "I can see what Dagur means by like how guests are like fresh fish."
Eret waggled his eyebrows with a giant grin. "What, they start to stink after three days?"
"That, and you'd occasionally like to gut them and see them fried in oil," Daniel said mock-dangerously. "Sleep lightly tonight, friend."
"On that couch? Like I've got a choice with those lumpy cushions," Eret replied with a smirk.
"You're talking as if you actually managed to sleep last night," Astrid threw in with a dry smile. "I'm pretty sure that you two were up until daybreak talking again. Or wait, no. Didn't you order that special barrel to be delivered to your rooms when I left?"
"Ah, yes. Dagur's Special Brew." Daniel's praise was almost comically exaggerated. "Honestly, I could kiss Dagur for coming up with this recipe. From what I remember, we were pretty smashed. Or rather judging by the… erm… lack of memory. But today there's nothing left. No headache, and I'm not even tired."
"Kissing Dagur?" Eret asked, smirking, and with a raised eyebrow.
Hearing the teasing tone in her friend's voice, Astrid decided to play along, and threw in, "Oh, I'd like to see that. That surely would be hilarious to watch."
Daniel groaned exaggeratedly, and threw his hands up in mock exasperation. "That was figuratively speaking. Honestly, can't you two detect a joke when it jumps at you? Or are you so busy making them that you can't tell the difference!?"
Eret and Astrid burst out laughing, and, a moment later, Daniel joined in. If felt good to do so, even if Astrid was acutely aware of the accumulating number of secrets between them. It felt weird, wrong even, but she couldn't help it right now. If Eret thought it better to keep his secret then that was his decision. She had no business interfering there.
And as for her own secret… Under different circumstances, she probably would have told them about her feelings. Freya, she definitely would have done so last year. But with this stupid law in place and Daniel being so unyielding about it, she didn't dare to give away anything. Not when it was Hiccup's life that was at stake.
And talking about him now didn't feel right anyway. She would have loved to hear more about him, but somehow was also glad for the change of topic. Hearing all these weird comments about him earlier had felt wrong, like an intrusion, especially without understanding what they meant and without him being there to explain them. She wanted to learn more about him, but she wanted to do so by him telling her. And if she was to meet him again in a few minutes anyway… She could wait that long! She would wait, would keep her feelings for him hidden, and outwardly be the same woman she'd been yesterday. Hiccup appearing in her life had turned her whole world upside down, but she couldn't let anyone see that.
And as long as she could spend her time like this, laughing and joking with her brothers, that was easy. Only later, when Hiccup was around, she would need to be more careful. Eret and Daniel knew her so well, she would need to be on her guard then. She was only glad, that they'd stopped talking about him now.
Or maybe not…
"But back to serious matters," Daniel began when their laughter had calmed down again. "About Hiccup… Did he… tell you anything? About what happened on Berk, I mean?"
Astrid tensed, but managed to not react at all while Daniel looked expectantly at Eret, waiting for his answer.
Eret's face turned into a dark grimace, and he shook his head. "No, he didn't. I asked him once, but… The memories seem to be quite painful, understandably, and… well, I didn't ask again. All I know is the semi-official part which you surely know, too. That they're dead and the Tribes blamed him for it. Which would be ridiculous if it weren't so grim. I mean…," he trailed off and ran a hand through his hair. "Anyway, there's not much we can do without causing an uproar. It's none of our business, after all. Even your father agrees there, if I understand correctly."
Daniel nodded. "Yes. Interfering with the Tribes' inner politics didn't seem like a good idea, even if they are part of Volantis."
"Just a semi-independent one," Eret commented. Astrid bit her lip and tried to keep her questions to herself. Hiccup was from the Tribes? She only knew the basics of the Northern Tribes; they lived on island chains in the Northern Sea, and mostly kept to themselves… and that was the extent of her knowledge.
Daniel shrugged. "You can't reign over an archipelago like you would a river valley – or open grasslands. Father talked it through with their dukes and agreed on giving them time to sort it out on their own. But now, I wish we could do more. We didn't even know he was still alive."
"Yeah, well, neither did I. Anyway, there's not much we can do right now. Because you're right, we can't interfere. All we can do is support him until he, maybe, can return one day. And that includes keeping his identity a secret for now, hence the whole squire business."
Daniel nodded again, though with a grim expression now. "Agreed."
They fell silent for a while, and Astrid turned her gaze to the ground in front of her. The path that led to the outer stables became narrow and bumpy here, which provided an excellent excuse for her not to meet Eret's or Daniel's eyes and possibly betray her troubled thoughts. She was still anxious to see Hiccup again, to compare the little information she'd learned with reality and to ask him all her questions. And yet… Suddenly, she was strangely reluctant to approach him about his past.
Whatever had happened that had brought him into this position, it must have been bad. If he hadn't even told Eret, if what had happened was too painful for him to talk about… Well, she hoped to learn about it all, but she wouldn't push him. There were enough other things to learn about him than simply how he'd ended up where he was now.
Despite the grim revelations she'd just overheard, a nervous smile spread across her face. The stables were almost in sight by now which meant she would see him again in only a couple of minutes. How would that be like? During the party last night, she hadn't really been able to process it all, had been too busy with hiding her feelings to examine them. Seeing him and being in close proximity to him had been weird, but manageable. It had been just another thing that added to the craziness that that night had been. But now?
Now, it had all settled. He was her soulmate. Despite the fact that she'd already thought about marrying him one day yesterday, today that thought seemed to have even more weight. Her soul, her future, her entire life was tied to him, in whatever way, and it felt… meaningful… important.
"Yeah, I know that look!" came suddenly Eret's voice. Just now, he'd been talking to Daniel, but she hadn't paid them any attention. Not until he now spoke louder, deliberately, almost calling out to her.
Startled, Astrid looked up and into his wide grin. Only now did she notice that she'd stopped walking and that both he and Daniel were watching her from a few steps ahead, where they had paused and turned to look at her.
"Yeah, she seems to be in an entirely different place inside her head," Daniel mused with an amused smirk. "I do wonder where though. It seems to be a nice place, judging by that dopey smile." He seemed intent on turning the table on her now, after they'd teased him before.
"Oh, I do have an idea," Eret laughed. "And I'd say the question is not where but who. Am I right, Swanja? Are you thinking about a special someone?"
Shocked, Astrid stared at them. Had she revealed too much? She'd been so careful… "I-I have no idea what you're talking about," she sputtered, and, trying to reign in her features, hurried past them.
"Ha! I knew it," Eret crowed. "Come on, Swanja. What's his name, eh?"
"What, are you suggesting our little sister might be thinking of someone male?" Daniel chimed in, his voice weirdly teasing and disbelieving alike. "That's hard to believe."
Daniel's tone struck her as odd. Surely, if he thought she'd been thinking of a man, he would react differently? She went on, fully intending to ignore their teasing, until Eret's words caught her off guard.
"No, I'm sure I'm right. Am I not, Swanja? Admit it, there is someone special waiting for you. Why else would you've gotten that dreamy smile and ignore us so determinately?"
Astrid's steps faltered. He knew? But… if he knew, had he told Daniel, too? And what would happen to Hiccup? From everything she'd heard so far, it seemed like Eret and Daniel wanted to protect Hiccup, but that could change in the blink of an eye. If Daniel learned about...
Or maybe they didn't know of whom she'd been thinking, after all. Yeah, that had to be it. Maybe they were just beating the bush, suspecting that she was thinking of someone without knowing who it was. She looked up at the sturdy wooden building that had come into sight by now. She only needed to cross this meadow and walk past the paddock, and then she could see him again. But did she dare to do that? Would she be able to act naturally enough when Eret and Daniel already suspected–
"I bet I can guess who it is," Eret went on, grinning mischievously. "Let's see… Does he have a thick mane of auburn hair and you're just dying to bury your fingers in it?"
Astrid stopped dead in her tracks. So he had noticed? Slowly, she turned to look at him. How could she make him stop talking, make him not reveal what he knew in front of Daniel? Would he even do that? Would he lie to his best friend for her sake?
"Oh, don't look so surprised," Eret went on, oblivious to her growing panic. "It's no secret, after all."
"Care to tell me what you're talking about?" came Daniel's puzzled but still amused voice from behind him. Astrid threw Eret a pleading look, begging him not to say any more, but he didn't seem to understand. Instead, he turned toward her brother with a mischievous grin on his face.
"Oh, don't look so surprised, Daniel," Eret replied cheerfully. He strolled past her, arms crossed behind his head. "I thought you knew your sister. Who would it be that puts her in such a good mood? There aren't all that many options, I'd say."
Astrid had turned to follow Eret with her eyes. She was still trying to make him stop talking, slightly shaking her head, but he barely paid her any attention. Instead, Daniel suddenly burst out laughing behind her. "Loki, you got me there," he gasped in-between. "And here I thought you were actually suggesting… No, you're talking about that gelding, right? What was his name? Markan?"
"Markor," corrected Eret, nodding. "Yeah, sure. Swanja and the horses, that's a love story on its own, after all." He chimed in on Daniel's laughter.
Relief washed through Astrid, but before it could show on her face, she managed to put on an incredulous expression. It equally suited her feelings, but didn't give away anything. "Oh, that's mature," she scoffed, and left them standing. With resolute steps she crossed the remaining distance between her and the stables, if only to get away from the laughing men. That had been awfully close. For a moment, she'd thought they knew…
But, lucky for her, they, too, still saw her as a girl and not as the woman she was about to become. And, maybe, she could use their expectations for her own advantage.
. o O o .
"Hey, no need to get greedy," Hiccup chided Cassie as the mare made a move to snatch one of the two apples out of his hand. "You already had yours, these are my breakfast." Affectionately, he patted her nose, and then went to sit on one of the many straw bales that littered the stables. He was done with his usual morning routine – providing the horses with fresh hay and water and making sure none of the spirited animals had hurt themselves. Trample had a shallow scratch on his rear, but Hiccup had directly applied a healing salve which should be enough. Now, he finally had time to care for himself.
He ate the first apple quickly and then began to nibble at the second, absentmindedly rubbing his scarred leg. It didn't hurt, not really. But rubbing it to get the stiff muscles to relax whenever he got the time had become somewhat of a reflex over the last two years. A warm smile spread across his face as he contemplated what kind of a strange morning this was. His leg didn't hurt, hadn't played him up at all during his work, and he'd actually slept through the entire night. Not once had he woken up, screaming or panting because of nightmares. For once, there had been no images of a vicious beast attacking him or of the burned remains of his life. No memories of surging pain, freezing cold, or bitter accusations had haunted him. No, instead he'd slept peacefully, for the first time in over two years, with the only image in his mind being her warm smile.
Indulging in the moment, he closed his eyes and called forth the memories of the previous day. Of her, of her true and unaffected laughter, of her radiant eyes. Of the way she'd melted into his arms, fitting perfectly as if they were made for her. A warm sense of ease spread through him at these thoughts, but he also couldn't help the spark of uncertainty that accompanied those feelings and memories.
In an attempt to calm his nerves, even marginally, Hiccup stood up again and walked over and into Cassie's stall. He gave her the remains of his second apple, and scratched her neck in greeting. She responded in kind, gave a happy snort and rubbed her head against his chest, which made him chuckle. "Yes, you're a good girl, aren't you?" he murmured quietly. He'd learned early in his life that humans weren't the only ones one could talk to when one had troublesome thoughts. Animals were equally good listeners, with the advantage of them not spreading the gossip as soon as he turned his back on them. And, unlike when he'd been a boy and that had just been a nice addition, now it was of utmost importance that no human ever learned about what he needed to get off his chest today.
"Yes, a good girl… You can keep a secret, can't you?" he continued in a low voice, head resting against her strong neck. "Because I don't know what to do. I miss her, can you believe that? Not even a day ago, I didn't even know she existed, and now… Now I feel like every minute I can't look at her or listen to her voice is wasted." Cassie gave a snort and Hiccup chuckled quietly. "Yes, it's silly, isn't it? But I can't help it. I want to see her again. I even thought about going up to the castle, but... " he trailed off, shrugging, and slowly shook his head.
There was no point in going up to the castle to look for her, he knew that. He couldn't very well walk up to the guards and request to be led to the Princess's chambers. And they certainly wouldn't let him walk around for hours to look for her on his own, either. Sure, he could always use Eret as an excuse, that he'd gone up there to see whether his master had any tasks for him to do. And there always was this hope that she might know that he was looking for her, that she would come to intercept him, or that they might even meet somewhere in the corridors by chance. But that wasn't very likely to happen. And even if that were to happen, there would still be servants and guards all around. Too much company to talk to her like he needed to talk to her.
All this was so… bewildering. Yes, he knew who she was, knew all the stories about the Princess, the official ones, just as well as he knew those few tales Eret had told him privately. And he knew her soul, could still feel it glowing in his heart. But all that wasn't knowing her.
"Am I going insane?" he asked quietly, but the only answer he got was a nondescript snort. Still leaning against Cassie's neck, he smiled weakly. "You're right, maybe I'm already insane. But I just can't get her out of my head. Her eyes and her smile and her hair. Freya, this hair… What would I give to simply be next to her and play with her hair right now? That would be enough. That, and talking to her without fearing who might overhear us. Like yesterday, when she was here. Gods, if only I knew when I can see her again. And..."
Hiccup trailed off as Cassie nickered, sounding almost amused. With a sigh, he scratched her neck once more and then left her stall again. Spelling out his problems hadn't helped, not really. He felt a little lighter for having done so, but he still didn't know what to do now. All he knew was that she was his future. It sounded absurd even if he just thought the words. But he didn't mean them like that, not exclusively at least. It wasn't just that nothing but her seemed to matter anymore. It was more that… that their lives were connected from now on. Whatever he did, every decision he made from now on would include her. She was inside him, was a part of his every thought, and even if he could change it, he wouldn't want it any other way.
And his path lay clear ahead of him. He would go to the West, would fight and distinguish himself as best he could. After last night's conversation, he was positive that he would get along well enough with the Prince. He had little doubts that the plan he'd made last night would lead him to the desired outcome. Especially as the Gods were on his side, too. They had to be, or they wouldn't have given him such a broad hint as to which path he had to choose.
No, that part wasn't his problem. He was confident that his plan would work. All he was uncertain about were the next few months. How often would they be able to see each other? Would they be able to talk at all? Would he ever get the chance to hold and kiss her again? The thought of even spending just this one day without doing so seemed like too much already. Last night, he'd bravely thought that he wouldn't mind possibly waiting for over two years to marry her. But if that also meant two years without… knowing her, he'd go insane.
Grimacing, he rubbed the back of his head as another, not all that pleasant emotion rose in his heart. Suddenly, he was angry at his father. Hiccup had never begrudged his father's choices in how to live and how to lead their House. Their lives had been simple but peaceful – or as peaceful as they could be with flying and fire-breathing monsters raiding their food stock regularly – and it had always been enough for him. But thinking about how things could have been, how, if his father had decided differently, he could have known Astrid for all her life…
The thought kept nagging at him, and he was still trying to pull himself together when he heard the sounds. Footsteps approaching quickly, and the raucous laughter of men.
. o O o .
As I said, ridiculously long... But, oh well...No direct Hiccstrid in here, but I hope there were enough other bits to entertain you. ;)
Two more chapters until the short break. :)
*Shoutouts*
To Berry: Aye, then you're right. We have a medieval!soulmate!au :)
And I guess this chapter answered you question about Valka's origin? ;)
The Dancup though... I could totally see that happen xD Who knows...
To MidwestMexican: Haha, yes that name is coincident. There even is a Daniel among those close to me, but I wasn't even thinking of my dear little brother when I named our Prince. The moment I thought of him, he came just crashing through a wall and introduced himself. I had no choice. xD
To Guest: Again, no hate against innocent characters here, please.
To BrawlerGamer: Well, that was intended ;) This is, after all, an M-rating. We might not have reached the juicy bits, but... well... ;)
To Sian HTTYD fan: Once again, thank you for your comments, especially on The Aftermath Of Being Stupid and My Game, My Rules. These two stories mean so much to me and I got so many mean reviews on them. Having someone leaving a good feedback means so much to me. Especially that you liked TAOBS better then ISG, because I always felt the same, but, apparently, not many did.
To harrypanther: Thanks a lot for your comment! Your compliment on the world-building means so much, to both athingofvikings and me. Because there really go many hours into that :)
And the dynamic between the restraint and the abandon... well, that's one the key-points why I wanted to write this story. So I'm really happy you liked that bit already. ^^
To Hiilikepie69: Thanks :) And yes, he will.