Title: Facing Forward
Author: ZombieJazz
Fandom: SVU
Disclaimer: I don't own them. Law&Order: Special Victims Unit and its characters belong to Dick Wolf. The character of Jack, Benji and Emmy have been created and developed for the sake of this AU series.
Summary: Brian Cassidy and Olivia Benson attempt to cope with his past abuse while trying to maintain their relationship and raise their family. This set of chapters is set in the aftermath of the S20E16 (Facing Demons). The story is also set in the Hello, Goodbye and Welcome Home AU.
Jack came up behind Brian and tapped the hot coffee cup against the front of his shoulder. The guy had been so set in his hunched position in the bleachers that he mustn't have registered that he'd come up behind him. Had jumped so much that the cup knocked so much.
"Shit," Brian muttered, as a bit of the hot liquid managed to get over the rim and hit the shoulder of his coat.
"Sorry," Jack muttered, and pulled the cup back a bit, as Brian brushed away the liquid.
At least it looked like he wasn't in his work get-up anymore. Wouldn't be. He'd likely already been home to pick up the kiddies from their after-school care stuff. Changed and was in the shit multi-layered coats that looked like he'd had for the majority of his lifetime - not that new leather jacket that Mom had got him around Christmas a couple years back. Good thing. Brian likely would've looked more pissed than he did. Hardly looked pissed at all, actually. He just kind of looked distracted and tired.
"It's OK," Brian said and took the pro-offered cup from him, giving it a sniff.
"It's that fancy High Line piss that you claim you hate but sure seem to like whenever anyone else's paying for it," Jack provided and sat down next to him.
It got a thin smile out of the guy. "Thanks, Kid," he allowed.
Jack just nodded. "Figured you could use it. You and Olivia both look wrecked lately."
"Yea, middle age, work and two kids does that," Brian mumbled over the edge of the cup.
Jack stared at him for a beat. But the guy didn't add anything else. Maybe it didn't really need further explanation. It wasn't like there was any kind of tone to it. Brian said it like it was just a statement of fact. And it was also likely plain fact. Though, Jack had definitely noticed that both of them looked like they'd been put through the ringer lately.
Jamin and Em had said some passing shit that hinted that not all was swell in Casa Bensidy either. Not that Jack had really witnessed any of these supposed 'whisper fights' when he'd been over. Extended silences and noticeable tension in the room? Yeah, he'd spent more than a few Sunday dinners sitting through that. But he'd just focused his visits in that environment basically on the kids. And anytime he got a chance to broach it with Mom she just brushed it off as her and Brian being really tired.
Apparently Brian wasn't going to give him anything more than that bagged response either. So Jack just sat there staring out at the basketball court too.
"There … and there," Brian pointed after taking a long swig of the brew.
Jack made a sound of acknowledgement. It was usually easy enough to spot either of the kids. Jamin you just had to look for the red. Emmy it was the bouncing ponytails skewed in all directions off the top of her head. But sometimes both of them were such tornados you really had to keep your eyes peeled to pick them out in a group you weren't observing from the get.
"They look a lot better than the weekend," Jack said.
"Miracle of antibiotics," Brian said.
"On bacteria that's not yet resistant," Jack provided.
It got a noise and a glance from Brian.
"The doc say anything about Jamin?" Jack knew it wasn't the first time that winter his nephew had been on antibiotics. It probably wouldn't be the last either.
Brian scrubbed at his face – again betraying he was beyond tired. He looked it. "Made some noise about his tonsils again."
"You guys gonna let them rip them out?" Jack asked.
Brian made another little sound and stared down at the court. "We're still waiting on getting the respirlogist's take on what's going on before letting them go at our kid with scalpels."
Jack allowed a slow nod, staring at the court too. He appreciated that. He knew Jamin had already had enough surgeries and doctors for a kid. Had left him fucked in the head enough about doctors and hospitals. But he still wished the doctors would give them a better answer about why Jamin had so many respiratory infections and seemingly endless strep throat. It was like the kid had no immune system and pretty much anything caused some sort of gland swelling in his throat and wheezing crackle in his lungs.
Seemed like they were all waiting for the sorta simple answer of asthma or allergies but that answer just didn't seem to be coming. At least the doctors had pissed of Mom and Brian enough they'd argued for a second opinion and referral and were putting off surgery that might not be necessary or even helpful. But still. It sucked that Jamin seemed to come down with this shit so much and some of the coughs and sore throat stuff just didn't seem pleasant. Seemed worse when it was going through their family and hit up Emmy too. Though, she seemed to have a better immune system than Jamin, which made Jack think that some of it had to do with whatever the fuck Izzy had gotten into while she was pregnant with him. And all the shit in that unheated and rancid freezer they'd lived in after Dad was gone.
And but still still – Jack could appreciate their stance and Brian's matter-of-fact statement of it even if the sentence included the 'our kid' as part of it. But he recognized that Jamin was Olivia and Brian's kid now.
That'd been a fucking hard road to settle in on. But a whole lot of talk therapy and family counselling and his own head-shrinker had gotten him to accept that it wasn't just Olivia giving Jamin a better life – it was Brian too. So much better than what Jack could've provided his little nephew. He knew that. And by them taking on all that – they were giving him a chance to have a better life - his own life - too. SO there was that. Such as it was.
But it was still hard sometimes to see Brian as Jamin's 'dad', though. Even though it was also pretty much the undisputed reality. Even Jack was pretty grossly aware of how much of a dad Brian was to Jamin and Em. And just how much they loved him that way. That that's just who and what he was. Without question. He was all they knew in that regard.
And it wasn't like Brian was a shitty dad by any means. He wasn't – as much as Jack maybe at the start had sorta hoped or wanted him to be. But he wasn't. He was so there in so many ways. Not just for Jamin and Em. For Liv. For him too.
So Jack almost knew too that there was some level of jealousy going on in him. That Jamin and Emmy were getting to grow up in a fairly nuclear family. Like it wasn't like they were entirely normal Norman Rockwell-esque. But they had a mom and a dad who lived together and cared about them. Sure wasn't something Jack had had. Knew Olivia and Brian hadn't had it either, though. And that was likely part of the reason they seemed pretty committed to it. To basically not sucking as parents. Not as a mom. And not as a dad.
They were giving those kids a good life. And that was something else that Jack had to learn to accept – that Mom got to have a life in that too. That she deserved to be happy and he shouldn't be doing shit or thinking shit or projecting shit that made that whole concept and situation harder for her.
He'd signed over Jamin to her and she'd given up a lot to take on all that. And then she'd bent over backwards to make sure he had a permanent and meaningful place in the family too. She'd fucking made herself a family – all of them a family – piecing it together bit by bit and really fucking fighting for it like every inch of the way. It definitely hadn't been easy. It'd been a fucking mess. So why make a good thing now – a mess? Why get his shorts in a knot? It just didn't make sense.
So Jack really couldn't pass too much judgement. Even though it sometimes sorta made him feel like he was out of the loop or some kind of third wheel. Fifth wheel?
Other times he really appreciated not having to be the 'everything' to Jamin. Not having to be like uncle and brother and father-figure and just parent. He probably would've sucked at all that. He had kinda sucked at it when he tried way back. But he was still just a kid then too. Not now. But now he just got to be some sort of cool way big brother-uncle hybrid. And it mostly worked. It mostly felt normal.
And when it didn't – he just tried to focus more on how normal all this was for Jamin. That he was happy. He tried to think about how much he loved and needed his dad when he was Jamin's age. How his dad was pretty much still a super hero then. The center of his fucking universe. His best friend.
So Jack just told himself over and over again he didn't want to fuck up Jamin having some of that too. Besides, Brian was mostly cool to him too. Didn't keep him on the sidelines too much. Wasn't like Brian and Mom made him feel second-fiddle. That was his own issue. So needed to just cope with it. Be the grown-up.
Fuck adulting sucked.
"Emmy agreed to this?" Jack muttered while he stared down at the kids more goofing around than running any kind of drills down there. Unless it was soccer – or Capture the Flag (sometimes disguised at flag football), Emily wasn't that down with the whole sport thing. Jack could relate.
Brian shrugged. "Her level of participation depends on the day of the week."
"And the venue," Jack provided.
Emmy definitely wasn't quite into organized activities in the same way as Jamin. But this was just drop-in – and it was basketball which the kids at least loved on the playground, and it was at the glorified playground that was the Chelsea Piers fitness complex.
So the comment got another small amused sound out of the guy. Brian knew that reality too, and he scrubbed at his face a bit more. "They're likely gonna want to go over to the Rock N Roll Gymboree for a bit when this wraps."
Jack shrugged. "Sure," he conceded.
He figured. He'd like it better if he could go into the Ninja Gladiator obstactle course designed for little kids. The indoor playground and foam pit and climbing wall was fucking ridiculous. Just fantastic. But he'd long ago stopped being allowed to go in since Em had more than managed to navigate the course on her own at about a hundred mile per hour. Long gone where the days of having to climb up or crawl into somewhere to retrieve her and bring her back down to the safety of flat ground and calm her screaming. Instead he was stuck on the sidelines with the rest of the adults – one of the ones streaming for the kids to get over to him and them screaming back, 'Five more minutes'. Which always meant more like thirty. Or an hour.
He knew that would likely be the way it went that night too. But he just didn't really care. Just hanging out at the Piers with them would likely be easiest anyway. Way better than trucking them back to his place and letting them destroy it for a couple hours.
"Mom around?" he asked, giving the rest of the stands some more of a cursory glance. See if she'd found some other parental type she wanted to try to be social with and had gone off to chit-chat. Olivia did that more than Brian. Brian almost never talked with other parental units at these things as far as Jack could tell. He just eagle-eyed Ben and Em.
Bri glanced at his watch. "She's still wrapping some shit at the precinct. I'll head that way, meet her, in a bit."
Jack gave a slow nod and pulled the third coffee from the tray and handed to him. Browner points for Brian instead of his own on that delivery. Too bad – always a good plan to stay on Mom's good side. Though, knew Brian would likely convey he'd been the buyer this time around.
"Been a while since you guys asked me to babysit on a school night," he commented.
Actually more than a while.
There'd been some nights where one of them called him if they were jammed up at work. There'd been some nights where he'd just been over chilling at their place anyway and they'd decided to adopt it as free babysitting service to go out for a drink or bite. Been some after-school pick-ups or weekend afternoon outings that he'd taken on the kiddies that he was pretty sure Mom and Brian turned into some kind of afternoon delight (which he also suspected for at least the past … many years .. often amounted to just doing a whole lot of nothing in a house that was quiet for a couple hours).
But for them to actually schedule a time for him watch the kids so they could do something all couple-y and date-like? Jack couldn't even pinpoint the last time he'd gotten that request. Not that he got the impression that this was exactly anything that amounted to couple-y or date-like either. Mom had been way too vague when she'd asked him for this solid.
The comment got a glance from Brian. "Yea, well, we've got something to take care of."
"Not your usual dinner reservation slot," Jack provided.
"I really don't need you busting my balls on this, Jack," he said. There was that look and tone of warning to it.
Jack didn't want to press it – as much as he did. Because it just felt like there'd been a whole lot of reading between the lines about the state of Casa Bensidy. But he'd been doing some reading. He might not be living in it like Jamin and Emily – but he sure as fuck had eyes and ears when he was around. He wasn't dumb either.
Still, he left it. For now. "Got mentioned Mom had some sort of schoolyard brawl with another mom there."
Brian made a slightly amused noise at that but still just swigged at his coffee.
"Getting called into the principal's office?" Jack tried. A tease and a prod.
"Not tonight," Brian muttered. "Won't be far. We're fine coming by to grab them after we wrap."
Jack exhaled slowly with his nod and looked down at the kids. "Just shoot me a text when you finish your 'thing'. If you're really only going to be a couple hours, might still be here. Or close. Go grab a slice or something."
Brian made a sound of acknowledgement. "Won't be long. School-night," he affirmed.
But Jack already knew that. That's why it made it so much fucking weirder they had called him on night-before notice with this request. It wasn't like Olivia was letting on that they'd snagged some sort of early bird dinner Groupon that needed to be used immediately or killer theater tickets or ordered to some Commissioner's Ball or something. So it just made him read between the lines and speculate even more. Because school nights? Mom and Bri were fucking religious about dinner, homework and bedtime scheduling. This did not fit into the usual schedule.
Still Jack shrugged. "Plans change, text. I can get them home, to bed, for you. It's fine. I've got nothing tonight."
It got another sound out of him but nothing more. Jack stared at him – side-eyed – for a beat.
"So what seriously happened at the dismissal gates? Because the way Ben and Em tell it – it was pretty much Wrestle Mania."
Some more amusement and Brian scrubbing at his face again.
It looked like he wasn't shaving much lately. Or had decided he was trying out some sort of … Hipster hobo look? Should've said that out loud. Brian would love that commentary.
"Ask Liv. Get it from the horse's mouth," he suggested.
Jack sighed. "Yeah. We've kinda been missing each other lately."
"Mmm," Brian grunted and looked directly at him. Right in the eye "Thinking that's purposeful."
Jack pulled his eyes away from that direct contact.
Sometimes it fucking pissed him off that he was able to pull more over on Mom than Brian. He didn't know if Olivia just gave him the benefit of the doubt or there was some 'love is blind' going on. But Brian called him way more quickly on his bullshit than Mom ever did. Not that she didn't call him out. She just let it drag on for a bit longer before she told him 'enough'.
Brian took another sip of his coffee. "You're getting her all worried about what's going on you. She doesn't need the extra stress right now."
"What's the other stress?" Jack asked.
Brian just drank his coffee and stared at the sort-of scrimmage going on with the school-aged kids on the court. Emmy was uncontrollably bouncing the ball and even more uncontrollably waving madly at them. They both offered up a couple smiles and waved. Brian did a great big sweeping one.
"Something at their school?" Jack tried when Brian's arm settled back down.
It got a slow exhale and he flicked at the plastic lid on the cup. "There's just a lot of layers to the bullying situation that Ben's fallen into. The school ain't being too responsive." He took another long drink. "We've got a meeting with the principal coming up. Try that route to get it sorted."
"That what the Mom Fight was about?"
Brian shook his head and stared down at the court again. Jack could tell he was staring at Jamin that time.
Jamin had some real talent at basketball. But he was weirdly talented at basically every sport he did – and Mom and Brian pretty much gave him the chance to try every sport imaginable. Way more than Jack had any opportunity to try growing up. Way more than he'd ever been interested in either.
But Jamin was definitely interested. Jack had put all his anger and agitation and anxiety and need for distraction and perfection and control and just fucking muscle memory into skating. Jamin? He ran. And ice skated. And tossed balls around and his pucks. And generally impacted with kids on football fields and hockey rinks.
It wasn't like he didn't skate anymore. Jack still took him out and took Emmy out too. It just was more like it was an occasional fun weekend activity in the summer months with their cool uncle than like … something either of them was passionate about.
Hockey. Basketball. Jamin seemed pretty invested in that stuff. Though, Jack also knew that it was partially because Brian was. Jamin's dad was. And Jack knew – tried to accept – that Jamin wanted to be just like dad. He remembered going through that phase too. Knew that sometimes even now he still did. Just hoped Dad would be proud of choices he'd made. For himself and for Benjamin. That he'd done the right thing. Something his Pops could support. He really hoped. A lot.
"One of the layers of it," Brian muttered.
"What's that even mean?" Jack grumbled right back.
Brian scrubbed at the sides of his head where his hair had kinda suddenly been shaved into a new hairstyle that Jack didn't get the sense he'd gone to the barber for. But the sarcastic comment he'd made about it a week or two ago had just been meet with just as sarcastic response from Brian. Some tit-for-tat when there really was some … weirdness going on with the guy. Most people don't just go shaving down their hair without reason.
"There's a little girl who's not so little," Brian nodded at him. "Her mom's a bit of a small-time someone in the whole activist front thing who wants to be a lot more than what she is."
"OK …?" Jack scrunched his brow at that explanation.
"She's involved with Black Lives Matter. Or thinks she is. A bit of a wannabe."
"OK," Jack allowed again and started to weigh where this might be going at a primary school level? Already sounded like no where good.
"So whatever is getting rightly or wrongly spouted on the home-front, this kid's major take-away seems to be cops are evil."
"Fantastic …," Jack muttered. He was starting to get the sense where this might be going. "I think the actual point is kinda being skewed there."
"No kidding. And She's decided to take it upon herself to turn Big Man into some sort of target because of what me and your Ma do for a living."
"So what's that even mean?" Jack pressed at him again – harder this time.
"Meant that Liv and this woman had a bit of a disagreement for one," Brian said and scrubbed at her face.
"Got to give the mom some credit," Jack allowed, "takes guts to take on Mom."
Brian shook his head. "Yea, well, this woman is pretty much a professional button pusher. And rather than having an adult conversation about the bullying situation, she went trying to turn it into something else. went pushing buttons. You kids and the more than twenty years your Ma has invested into working for this city and its citizens..."
Jack groaned a little and gave his head a little shake, staring down at the kids. He knew those weren't areas you got into too far with Mom. Not if you wanted to still be intact the next morning.
"Don't think I'd want to see that Death Match," he muttered.
"Oh, but you can," Brian muttered and Jack caught his eyes. "Punch it into YouTube."
Jack rolled his eyes. "You're fucking with me?"
"I wish," Brian said and swigged at the coffee again. "Good news is that there's not much to see. Because Liv's a professional But what there is does make this other woman look …" he shook his head. "Fucking PR and optics nightmare for al" sides here. But Least it shows off that maybe at least some cops know how to deescalate a situation and keep their heads."
"I likely wouldn't have," Jack muttered, scuffing his foot across the bleachers.
He got the whole good cop, bad cop, dirty cop thing. He'd had his own run-ins with police that he knew could've gone way sideways if didn't call out that he was the kid of a cop. And he was a fucking white, college kid in Manhattan. On the surface he screamed privilege to people who didn't know him. He knew it. But he also knew he was still getting himself around a lot of stuff that came with not living in small town, rural America anymore.
He did know, though, that his mom and Brian had been through a hell of a fucking lot on the job. It'd fucked with them mentally, emotionally and physically. And they still put on the badge and the gun every day. They weren't one of the cops who were the problem. And it pissed him off that people like them were still … considered part of the problem. But there was the whole problem. Stereotypes and assumptions and just a historic, sociological, perpetuating mess.
Change was needed. He knew that. And so did Ma and Brian. They'd busted their asses their whole lives trying to create some change. Mom was definitely a proud bleeding heart liberal. she supported stuff like this. BLM. Me Too. Time's Up. She advocated for all kinds of people. From all kinds of backgrounds. With all kinds of history. And she was teaching that all to Ben and Emmy. Jack knew it. She challenged his own small town, small minded shit too. Truth bombed him in a way textbooks and media stats didn't. she made sure all of them had some kind of age-appropriate grip on all kinds of things"
So whatever was going on with this mom and her kid - right, wrong, confused or slanted messaging - it still definitely didn't seem like something that a fucking ten-year-old kid – whatever his skin color or whatever his parents did for a living – should be getting bullied about. He would've lost his head just because of the whole … confusion around the situation. The messaging and the trickle down affect and just how you education and fix any of this. He didn't know.
He wished he did. but maybe that was the point too. he was able to acknowledge he really didn't. He was able to listen and learn. And that's what Mom and Bri were about too. That's what they taught them.
"Yea, well, better her than me – because she's come at me before and I was already getting close to losing it on her," Brian muttered into his coffee. "And I'm way too white and host to the completely wrong genitalia to be getting into it with her. Would've turned into a bigger scene than it was."
Jack just looked at him. Tried to process that. "So is the kid leaving Jamin alone now at least?"
Brian sighed hard at that and pressed his fingers across his brow. "Kid, there's just a whole lot of layers going on to what's happening to Big Man right now. They're coming at him from a bunch of different angles in a bunch of different ways."
"Like what?" Jack demanded.
Brian exhaled again and slumped his elbows onto his eyes to gaze over at him. "Ben's Ben, Jack," Brian pressed at him firmly. "He struggles socially. Still. He can be spazzy. You know that. We've got this dyslexia thing going on. He's struggling academically and he knows it. It frustrates him. And it embarrasses the shit out of him. Especially with our little Mensa girl down there. And he knows you aren't exactly stupid either, Kid. He feels fucking stupid. And he's got the kids at school are more than aware he's a little weird. They see differences. They know he's a cop kid and this ring leader is turning that into a fucking Scarlet Letter. Somehow word's out that him and Duckie are adopted and apparently that's a fucking thing too – because kids at this age can just be fucking mean. That's where we're at."
Jack tried to hear all that. He tried to process it – and just the fucking wave of sadness that impacted with him in hearing the way Brian spat that out.
"Ben hasn't said anything to me …," he said.
Brian stared down at Jamin again. "Well, he's not exactly talking openly about it to me and Liv either. Part of the reason we're having such a fucking hell of a time trying to get a handle on this for him."
"I …," Jack shook his head. He wanted to say … 'thank you'. Because he didn't know if or how he could handle this situation if he was still full-time in-charge of Benji. He'd likely fuck it all up – even if he tried.
He felt Brian's hand squeeze into his shoulder and he gave it a glance. "It's OK," Brian nodded at him. "He's OK. We're OK."
Jack gave a weak nod and stared down at his nephew again. "Should I be spending more time with him? I know lately … just finishing out my studio project …"
"It's fine, Kid," Brian said. "No one feels like you're absent, OK?"
Jack took the turn to scrub at his face a bit – his own fatigue and sorrow. "You see that Eventbrite I sent you guys?" he asked instead. "The comic making class at the Super Hero Supply Corp. I was going to take them on Saturday, if … you know … they want to go, you and Mom want a couple hours …"
Brian gave another nod and his shoulder another squeeze and a little fist bump as he let it go. "Sounds good to me," he allowed. "I'll run it by Liv. And the kiddos."
Jack gave him another look. "Last time I talked to Mom she mentioned that Em's party is getting canned? That have anything to do with all this?"
Brian made a noise and shrugged. "Maybe was kinda the nail in the coffin. But I've been wanting us to re-think the whole class party thing for a while. Just not feeling too in-love with the school community right now. Or like anyone wants us to be part of it. Or are treating our kids like full, rightful, included members of it. You know?"
"Yea …," Jack acknowledged. "So she said … just going to do a family day or something the weekend before?"
Brian acknowledged. "Yea. But we'll do dinner and cake with family. You, my Ma. Likely ome of Liv's tribe over there. So if you don't want to tag along – no biggie."
"What are you doing?" Jack asked.
Brian shrugged. "We haven't nailed it down yet. We were talking the aquarium or maybe whatever that Nat Geo thing is they've got going over here," he said gesturing absently off in what would be the general direction of Times Square. Vaguely.
"That will cost a giant small fortune," Jack muttered.
"Yea, well, still much prefer to spend the money, time and energy on a day hanging with my fam-damily than a room full of unappreciative ass-hats, douche bags and bullies."
Jack nodded. "I might come if it's just an afternoon thing. I got the impression from what Mom had said that you were thinking of getting away for a few days or something."
Brian ran his fingers down the side of his face again. "Yea, maybe," he conceded. "Think we're all running a little on empty. We were just spit-balling, though. We'll let you know when we start to firm things up."
He let his head bob but stared at his feet, clasping his hands until he looked over at Bri. "You seriously not going to tell me what you and Mom are going to tonight?"
Brian grabbed his eyes. "You seriously not going to tell me what's with the avoidance game you're doing with your Ma?"
Jack exhaled and kept his eyes. "I'm seeing someone," he said flatly. "But I think you already had that figured out."
Brian stared at him. A long beat. "How's that going?"
Jack exhaled again and shook his head as he went back to gazing at his feet. There were so many ways to answer that question. So much he wanted to say about it. There was so much stuff he wanted to talk about it about it. But then also he didn't. Hence – avoidance.
"I'm not sure," Jack allowed.
"Mmm …," Brian hummed at him.
Jack squeezed a bit at the bridge of his nose and looked at him again then. "I'm not really ready to get into Mom's twenty – THOUSAND – questions about it, her. Or to hear her thoughts and opinions on it."
Because he knew when Mom did find out about this relationship – about her – she was going to have all kinds of thoughts and opinions. And it always just came off as commentary on him and his life and his past and his inability to function as a human being or adult. And Jack just didn't want to deal with that right now.
He couldn't. Not when he was still figuring out if this was anything or would be anything or how into it – her – he was. If it could even work? When you're with someone nearly – maybe more – fucked up than you. Who maybe reminds you too much of your Mom and you can't decide if that's a good thing, bad thing or completely fucked up thing? Not when he really liked this girl – woman – in a way he didn't entirely understand. In a way that made him completely uncomfortable when in other ways it just felt so fucking comfortable.
And then there was the whole … just other levels to it. Aspects and considerations. He just didn't fucking know. And he didn't want Olivia's mom anxieties and protectiveness pressing into the way he sorted this out. He was a fucking adult man. Or at least he tried to be. He was trying to figure out how to be that. Or at least how to be a functioning human being.
"I hear ya …," Brian acknowledged and just went back to staring at Jamin and Emmy again. It looked like the rec co-ordinator they had down there was starting to work at wrangling the kids to get this thing wrapped up.
"Your turn," Jack said.
Brian just stayed fixed on the court. Though, he stood – likely partially to escape his question and to just end the conversation right there. But maybe also so the kids could see where he was in the stands.
Not that there were a ton of parents loitering there that session. Most would've gone and done their own workout or grabbed a coffee and fiddled on their phones during this thing. They'd be waiting outside the doors when the kids went flying out. But not Brian. Never Brian. He was always in the stands. Even Jack knew that – and Brian wasn't even his dad.
"The family therapist," Jack said flatly to his back. "About dealing with Jamin?"
Brian gave him a little glance. "Not exactly."
Jack processed that and caught his eyes quick before he turned away again. "Bri … you and Mom? You're doing alright, right?"
Brian lifted his arm high again. And Jack watched Emmy and Jamin start sprinting their way. But then he got another glance.
"Liv and me – we've got a lot of mutual respect. A bit of a rough patch – but we're working on it."
"Jamin …?" Jack asked softly – almost scared of the answer. If Benji was too much even for them? if it was his nephew that was hurting thier relationship and causing all the stress and conflict that was sitting in this quiet tension in that house? what that would mean? How Olivia would chose? Or feel about any of it? what any of them would do if something happened to thier family?
But Brian only shook his head. "Just life, Jack. That's all. But Liv – she's the love of my life. And the kiddos? They're my whole life. Love the m to the moon and back, same as your mom. So – it's gonna work out. You don't need to worry about it."
And he nodded. He didn't have much choice – because Brian was already taking a few steps down the bleachers to give the kids half-armed hugs and good-byes. But Jack knew he was going to worry about it. He already was.