Chapter 10 – So We Meet
I left Bella's at 6:30 when her alarm went off. I headed off to hunt once more. I was determined to do everything I could to not be thirsty today. I was going to meet Bella.
After I hunted and disposed of the deer I went home and showered. I had a late day again, with no class until 1:00, so I spent extra time trying to look decent. Vampires are known for their beauty. I could never understand then why I had so many cowlicks. My hair, no matter what I did, never sat down and looked finished. It always looked like I had just rolled out of bed, which is ironic for someone that never sleeps and doesn't even own a bed. I finally gave up trying to make it look decent and figured that in the minds of most girls my hair was "sexy" so I went with it hoping that Bella wasn't offended by it.
I went to my closet trying to decide what to wear. Normally I grabbed the first thing my hands touched. The only decision I paid attention to was the weather. Since vampires don't get hot or cold we don't need to dress to accommodate the climate, but as we wanted to blend in we also knew better then to wear heavy pants and sweaters when it was 90 degrees outside. It was early September and was still in the 70's so I could skip over the corduroys and sweatshirts.
Today though I didn't grab the first thing I touched. I wanted to look nice, decent, clean cut, respectable, solid, approachable, unintimidating, but mostly as human as possible. It definitely wouldn't hurt to look attractive either. I looked through all the clothes that I had and couldn't decide what to wear. In almost 90 years I have never dithered over clothes. I felt like a 12 year old girl that was going to see the Jonas Brothers. I finally decided to act like a man and get it together. I settled on a pair of navy cargo shorts, a blue t-shirt under a button down short sleeve brown and blue checkered shirt that I kept open. I added a pair of brown sneakers with no socks. Casual yet tidy. Yes this would do nicely. I rolled my eyes at my internal monologue.
I sighed and pulled my hair trying to figure out yet again why it mattered so much. Why I was so adamant on impressing this human girl. I pinched the bridge of my nose and decided to get out of the house for a while before I went to school. I needed to calm down. I quickly ran to a meadow in the middle of the forest. It was my sanctuary. It was far enough away that I didn't hear the thoughts or voices of anyone. I could think in peace and solitude with no interruption.
One of the first things I did when we moved somewhere new was to seek out a place of solitude. After almost 90 years I was use to the constant voices of humans and thoughts and dreams but there were times I needed a break, to get away and have my own thoughts that weren't clouded by anyone else's. I have found myself seeking solitude more and more over the years, disillusioned by the drone of thoughts from humans that have no cares beyond themselves and their own selfish whims. Humans who care little for the world outside themselves and even less for learning.
Sometimes I feel like I am being sucked into the world of humans, listening to their thoughts constantly. I drown in the mindlessness of it all and find that I need to get away and be alone. I don't even bring my family to my places of solitude. While I love my family, and their thoughts aren't as pedantic as most humans, they still wear on me. After spending decades with each of them I know what they are going to think about most given situations; there is no spontaneity or newness to anything.
Quiet was a novelty and a solace. I sat and soaked in the stillness and thought of how meeting Bella would go. Would she smile at me? I hoped so. I pictured the smile she had given me days ago. I treasured it and hoped that I would see her smile more. Would she laugh? It seemed too much to hope for but, I prayed to whatever god there was that I could someday soon share a laugh with her. I thought of all the things I could say to Bella. All the questions I wanted to ask her. All the things I wanted to share with her.
Finally it was time to leave and stop thinking about meeting Bella and actually do it. I ran home and enjoyed the drive in my car to school. I noticed the anxiety I carried with me. I wanted this meeting with Bella to go well. I wanted to show her I wasn't a monster. I snorted. Who was I kidding? I am a monster. Maybe Bella had already met enough monsters in her life and subjecting her to me, another monster, would be a torture. I ran my hand through my hair tugging on the strands trying to figure out if I should just wait and not meet her today. As soon as that thought came to me what was left of my heart plummeted. I needed to meet and talk to her. I growled. Hopefully I would get over this insane obsession I had with her soon. I was not use to being so confused and vacillating over something as simple as saying hello to a human.
I got to the quad and sat down at a table near where Bella normally sat and waited for her and Alice to come in. It didn't take long and she was entering the room, beautiful. She was dressed as I had seen her most days in simple shorts and a t-shirt with leather cuffs on her wrists. She and Alice went to the table in the corner. Bella set her cookies out and left to go get some tea and hopefully something to eat.
Alice looked at me. Come over here. I walked over and sat in the chair across from where Bella sat, as far as I could be from her. I knew it would give me little help from drowning in her scent, but again every little bit that could help I would take. I was determined to not harm her.
Bella came back and stumbled when she saw me sitting at her table. She caught herself and looked at Alice. Alice was humming in her head and practically bouncing in her seat. She was trying to block me but I got flashes that she was excited for me and Bella to meet. I could hear Emmett and Jasper talking and both noticed how excited Alice was and they were teasing her. She was telling them to shut up when Emmett started to act like a hyped up pixie on drugs pretending he was Alice. Alice finally threatened to tell Rose about a secret porn stash he had. All of this took place with no one the wiser. With our sensitive vampire ears and ability to hear and process things quickly the whole conversation took place in seconds too quietly for a human to hear.
Bella sat down. I had been holding my breath then inhaled slightly to test if I could deal with her. I felt the burn and my mouth flooded with venom. The monster was elated that the prey he had been seeking was right there, within arms reach. I figuratively beat him back and tried to ignore the fire that was so much worse with Bella right there, where I could not only smell her but see and hear the blood pumping through her veins - her heart beating the precious scarlet drink I craved.
Alice chirped at Bella. "This is my roommate Edward. I didn't get a chance to introduce him in sociology last week. He needed to tell me something and I hoped you didn't mind that I asked him to sit with us. I'm sure if he is over here Jessica'll leave him alone." She winked at Bella.
She sat down tentatively and took a quick smell of her tea and looked at me. "Hello, Edward, pleased to meet you." She took a hidden breath and held her hand out to me.
I was shocked, thinking she didn't like touching men, but I was not going to refuse her impeccable manners. "The pleasure is mine Bella." I took her hand lightly, very aware that with my strength I could crush her tiny hand with no exertion on my part, and was shocked. There was a current that flowed through her touch. I had never felt anything like it.
Bella gasped and withdrew her hand looking at it then at me. I smiled tentatively at her. I didn't want to make an issue of the shock I felt when touching her. I wondered if the reason she pulled away was because she felt the shock too or if my cold skin surprised her. Me, I could still feel the warmth on my hand from her hand, even though it was an incredibly brief contact. I wanted more.
Normally I avoided touching humans. First, because humans notice my cold hard skin. Ours doesn't feel like a human's skin and I don't want to attract questions or attention. None of us do. Second, because I'm personally uncomfortable touching humans. The heat of their skin reminds me of all that I'm not and I don't like that tactile reminder.
As I was coming to realize, Bella's touch didn't affect me the way a human's normally did. Instead of being repulsed by it I craved it again. I wanted to feel that shock of electricity and the warmth that was Bella; knowing that as long as her touch was warm she was alive. I wanted to take hold of her hand and not let go. I groaned internally at my melodramatic ramblings.
Alice caught the whole exchange and looked and me and lifted her eyebrows and grinned mischievously. Oh she knew something and again was not telling me. I was starting to get very frustrated about the whole thing. I glared at her and she smiled.
I was starting to breathe a bit more normally. The scent of Bella was still causing me to burn but the monster inside wasn't thrashing trying to get out either. He was waiting for an opening and I was determined he would not get one.
She turned to Bella and ignored me, "Don't mind Edward, he's a cranky broody boy." I rolled my eyes and Bella gave a small chuckle and shook her head.
"I'm sure that's not true," she said. Then she cocked her head and glanced at me. "Then again, the broody emo guy turns a lot of girls on. Maybe that's your goal?" She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand, her eyes huge in shock.
Alice snorted. "Is that it Edward? Are you trying to attract girls like Jessica?" She waggled her eye brows at me. Unbeknownst to Bella, Emmett had picked up on the conversation and was inputting his thoughts on my broody nature and attracting girls.
"I am so sorry Edward. I shouldn't have said that." Bella was obviously shocked at what she had said and thought I was offended. Little did she know I was shocked and amazed that she had joked so quickly with me. I wasn't offended. I was ecstatic. I choose to ignore that it in all likelihood had more to do with her easy going nature with Alice then with me.
I winked at her. "Don't worry I am in no way upset with you. While some people may be moody brats to attract girls I assure you that is not my intention." I turned to Alice. "Plus I don't agree that I am cranky or broody. I think that some pixies are so hyper that anyone that doesn't want to keep up is assumed to be deficient."
Alice stuck her tongue out at me. "Nope you're cranky and broody." She looked at Bella again. "Ask Emmett, Jasper or Rose and they will all agree with me." Emmett called out quietly that he darned well would agree to that and more; Jasper was trying to not laugh.
Bella smiled softly at me. "Don't worry. I know a hyper pixie myself that is convinced I need fixing for a plethora of reasons. I find it easier to ignore her then change her." She grabbed her tea and sniffed it while taking a sip.
"Well maybe we can ignore her together." I was nervous that I was pushing Bella and was prepared to back track quickly if necessary.
Bella considered me and tilted her head to the side. "Maybe we can."
"Hello, the pixie you are talking about is right here and I will not be ignored!" Alice huffed.
Bella shocked me; she smirked and winked at me. "So tell me Edward, what's your major?" There was almost a light in her eyes. Dull but there. I was drowning in them. They were a deep brown and they pulled me in, willing me to see her very soul. I found myself further enchanted by this beautiful human girl.
I chuckled, "History with an emphasis in Music, yours?" Alice was steaming next to us, though I knew it was pretend.
Bella tried to hold back a smile, "English Lit." I nodded at her.
"I'm business, for when I open my fashion boutique, in case anyone cares around here!" Alice said while waving her arms wildly.
Bella laughed. She laughed and it was a true laugh, not loud, not boisterous, but real and all the more precious for being so. She reached over and one arm hugged Alice. "Of course I care sweetie. I wouldn't tease if I didn't love you."
Alice grinned and hugged her back. "I gotta go talk to Jazz for a minute. Catch ya later!" She looked at me STAY! This was unexpected. I didn't think that Alice would leave me alone with Bella because of how she felt about men and how she made me thirst. I swallowed because I was nervous. As soon as Alice left the table a tension settled.
I looked at Bella "Soooo, Alice tells me you moved here last semester?"
Bella looked up not quiet meeting my eyes before looking away, "Yeah, that was my first semester here. Alice told me you were gone last semester traveling for some kind of internship?"
I nodded. Bella grabbed her tea and took a long smell of it and slowly drank. I quirked an eyebrow at her. "Why do you smell your tea like that?" I was inexplicably excited to be learning the answer to one of the many questions that have plagued me about this girl.
She looked at me startled. "Oh, umm, it relaxes me I guess?" She paused and tilted her head as if considering what more to say. "The smell of the tea either calms me or excites me, I guess, depending on what kind it is. Right now I have peppermint tea. I love the smell of the mint and I find it peaceful and relaxing. Sometimes the smell is better than the tea itself. I don't know, kinda weird I guess." She shrugged her little shoulders and looked down picking at the cuffs on her wrists.
"No I get it, sometimes the scent of something can almost overpower you. It can draw you in wanting more." If Bella only knew how her scent did that very thing for me. Emmett was making snide comments about singers and was making me mad. Jasper thankfully told him to shut up.
"Why aren't you eating lunch?" I asked her.
She shrugged. "Not hungry. Why aren't you?" She asked finally glancing in my eyes, before quickly looking away.
"I ate earlier."
She rolled her eyes and then looked at me. She looked me in the eyes like she was searching for a specific answer. I held her gaze and let myself fall into the depths of her brown eyes hoping that she saw that I was not a threat to her, not at least in the way that she possibly would think. I would never physically assault her. I groaned to myself. No, I wouldn't beat her; I just wanted to suck her blood and kill her. Did she see the monster in me? She was looking so intently.
Suddenly she nodded her head once and flicked a gaze over to the table where my brothers and sister were sitting. She tilted her head considering something and shrugged her shoulders. I wanted to know what she was thinking. I assumed that when I could finally talk to her it would be better, but it was worse. I had no clue what had just happened but I knew it was somehow significant, at least to her. What had she decided?
Bella was still very tense and kept watching the people around us as if she was searching out a threat. I wanted to reassure her that there was no way that I would allow anything to happen to her, and that my family was also set on offering her protection but there was no way to work that into the conversation. "Yes Bella, I am obsessed with you and my sister has been keeping track of you and just this past weekend my entire vampire family and I talked and decided that you must have been raped or abused in same way and we would like to reassure you that we won't allow that to happen, in fact I stay outside your bedroom window each night watching you to make sure you're protected." Yeah I can imagine that reaction!
"Tell me, what you think of our sociology professor? I hope that Alice forwarded my apology for rushing out of class so quickly. I hope that you were in no way offended by my atrocious manners."
"Dr. Merrill seems likable enough. She is easy to listen to and doesn't drone on to put you to sleep. She has interesting ideas and I think the class will be ok.
"Alice did tell me about the emergency and I wasn't offended at all about you leaving like you did. I understand the need to get home to help. Don't worry about it."
I smiled at her. "Thank you." I glanced around and pretended to read the clock. I already knew what time it was but I didn't want to push it with Bella. I was hoping getting to know her in small doses would allow her to be at better ease with me. "Listen I should be going. I have a class to attend. It was a pleasure meeting you Bella and I hope to converse with you again soon."
She blushed and the monster in me raged. All that beautiful blood rushing to the surface of her skin, calling to me, practically begging me to taste. "It was nice meeting you also Edward." She smiled tentatively and I grabbed my stuff and all but ran away needing to get away from the call her blood had over me. I was embarrassed and ashamed at my lack of control in the end to a simple blush. I groaned worried that any headway I had made was destroyed as I ran away from Bella. What did she think of my inexcusable behavior?
Edward! Wait. Hold on there boy. Jasper was walking to catch up to me. I slowed so that he could. I know you are beating yourself up right now. Why? Cause you had to rush out? She's your singer and I saw her blush. Instead of berating yourself you should be darned proud that you didn't kill her. I can't think of a vampire that could have walked away in that situation. Stop focusing your broody emo ass on the negative and think about the positive.
I leaned over and smacked him for the broody emo comment. I took a deep breath. "You're right, of course, I just don't think that meeting Bella and literally running away from her makes a good impression."
Alice was already doing damage control before you were out of the building. Trust Alice, she's as happy that you're talking to Bella as you are. She'll smooth out any rough edges that need smoothing. Don't worry about it. So tell me, how was it finally meeting Bella? There was a teasing tone to Jasper's thoughts.
I rolled my eyes. "It was nice." I knew it was pointless to hedge my feelings as Jasper could pick up all the internal struggles and elation I had but I wasn't ready to vocalize anything yet. I was still so conflicted and torn.
Jasper snorted. Yeah, nice. Stop beating yourself up and get to class.
I nodded and left him. I focused my thoughts back to the quad, I wanted to watch Bella. I kept shifting through the thoughts of people there to keep an eye on her. Alice had left. Emmett was sitting with Rose, but they were so into each other that neither was really paying attention to Bella.
As I was flitting through people's minds I caught the vitriolic poison of Jessica's. She was working herself into a state over Bella and the fact that I had been sitting with her for a time. She finally got up the nerve to walk over to Bella to set her straight. I was livid that I was trapped in a class watching this whole thing play out and not able to stop it. There was no way I could get out of class and back to the quad before Jessica spewed her venom at Bella.
Jessica sat down across from Bella, who looked up at her with huge eyes, not having a clue what was going on but knowing it wasn't going to be good. "I am not fooled by your sweet, innocent, damaged princess complex. I know you're just a little slut like everyone else and that you're looking to grab the biggest fish you can. Well stay the fuck away from Edward Masen because he's mine!"
Bella visibly shrank back in her seat. Rose appeared at Jessica's side. "Is there a problem here Jessica?" Rose's voice was stone cold.
Jessica got up and glared at Rose. "Nope, just making sure that Bella here is fully aware of the world and how it works." She smirked at Bella knowing she had intimidated her.
"Yeah and how is it the world works? No sane guy would get near a diseased skank like you. Let me guess you are fantasizing again that Edward and you are a couple, when everyone knows that Edward would rather cross the street then walk in front of a tramp like you."
Jessica huffed, "Whatever, bitch" and walked away.
Rose sat down. "I swear I am going to take a roto rooter to that girl's vagina. Are you ok, Bella?"
Bella nodded.
"Hey, don't let Jessica get to you. She thinks she is something she isn't. Trust me you have nothing to worry about with her." Rose stated.
Emmett was distraught. He wanted to do something for Bella but didn't know what. Rose was not use to touchy feely and honestly still wasn't that interested in getting involved with Bella. Laying a smack down to humans she hated was one thing, hugging was another.
Bella got up and stuttered out that she need to go to the library and took off. I was in class boiling. Bella had been verbally attacked because I talked to her. That was unacceptable and I needed to find a way to correct this. I would not allow Bella to be talked to like that. Rose was on the same wavelength as me and going through options to deal with Jessica. One thing I love about Rose, she has a vindictive side and it seemed her hackles were up for Bella. Or at least she was ready to play and let Bella be her excuse. Either way Jessica would be dealt with.
I sat through class burning, itching to get out. I wouldn't be able to see Bella again as she was done with class before me and usually went straight home. I did though spend time keeping track of Jessica. I would be talking to her yet today. When my chemistry lecture got out I had a few minutes to kill before my next class and I knew that Jessica was back in the quad.
I hurried over and caught her eye; I titled my head to the side to let her know I wanted to talk to her. She jumped up and came over to me. I smiled and walked outside, I didn't want to have this conversation with others around.
When we got outside I walked to a semi secluded spot and turned on her. Vampires can do two main things with our appearance. We are beautiful and can draw in humans to can drink their blood. We can attract them so much that they would all but beg for us to kill them they are so hypnotized, or we can let the monster show. When we do that there is no veneer and fear is all that is left for humans to feel.
When I turned to Jessica I had dropped all traces of my human side. The monster was fully showing. I even retracted my lips so that my teeth showed. Jessica turned white and her heart stuttered. She was shaking and I could smell the adrenaline pumping through her system.
"I don't know what I have to do to get you to understand that I am not interested in you, I have never been interested in you, and I will never be interested in you. You have NO claim on me and you will stop acting like, and telling people, you do! Leave me alone! This is the only warning you get. If you insist on trying to lay claim to me or tell others that you have a claim, I promise you that you will regret it in ways that you cannot imagine."
I turned and walked away. Jessica's thoughts were chaotic. She was a mess and didn't move for more than 5 minutes. I was satisfied that I got through and that she would leave Bella alone.
When my last class was finally finished I went as fast as I could, while maintaining my human façade, to my car and drove to Bella's house. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Bella. The connection I always felt when near her was stronger than ever. She was sitting outside smelling her tea. Now I knew why which made me smile. She looked very deep in thought and her brow was furrowed. After a time she glanced up and looked right where I was and stared. I was well hidden in the trees and knew she couldn't see me. Nonetheless, I was disconcerted. Finally she sighed and shook her head looking away. Her brow furrowed again and she sat contemplating whatever it was that had her upset. Was it Jessica? Was that enough to have her so deep in thought?
Bella sat outside late into the night just thinking. Sometimes she seemed . . . happy? Content? Most often though the thoughts she was having were troubling her greatly. I wish I knew if she was thinking about me and if that was causing her the smiles or the furrowed brow. All at once she stood up and muttered "It doesn't matter anyway, there is nothing you can do and even if you could he'd only hate you." She turned, went in to her kitchen, and gathered the ingredients for the night's baking with slightly more energy than necessary.
I sat watching her, wondering about her comment, and why she was so upset. She didn't seem angry, more like resigned and depressed. Once she was done baking cookies at one in the morning she took a long bath. I tried very hard to ignore the idea of Bella in her bath and finally left for a while so that I didn't feel like I was invading her privacy listening to her bathe.
When I came back she was in bed almost asleep. I sat and watched as the cares of the day slowly lifted from her face as she fell into slumber. This was becoming my favorite part of the day, seeing her face relax and the small furrow that always seemed to be on her brow leave. As she slept she looked like an angel at peace, she truly was beautiful.
That night she dreamed and my breath stopped when I heard her murmur "Edward." She was dreaming of me. There was a slight smile on her face. Oh what was she dreaming? She mumbled something else that was incoherent and how I wished it wasn't so. Then her little brow furrowed again and my heart broke as I heard her utter. "Edward, no I'm so sorry . . . so sorry." She lay still and fell out of dream and I sat stunned. What could this angel be apologizing to me about in dream? There was nothing she could do wrong. I fought so hard to not go into her room and sweep her in my arms and tell her that very thing.
I was still sitting stunned thirty minutes later when the stillness of the night was broken with her whimpers. She was having a nightmare again and I knew it was only a matter of minutes before she started screaming in terror. If watching my angel fall asleep was my favorite time of the day this was the time I came to dread, when the demons that haunted her won, and she was helpless to fight them. This dream seemed to be particularly harsh and she was tossing and turning and I feared she would fall out of her bed. Then she cried words that chilled me. "Jessica please don't, I'm sorry, please don't let them" and she screamed and woke up.
I sat there panting. Had Jessica scared her that badly by telling her to stay away from me? That didn't make sense? Or did Jessica's actions today bring up memories that already haunted her? The thought that Jessica scared her that badly made me consider that I needed to do something more than just tell her to leave me alone. Jessica needed to suffer for causing such a beautiful, troubled, angel so much pain. I knew that I shouldn't do anything more, but I wanted to.
Bella sat up and was shaking. It took her much longer to calm down from this than normal and finally she gave up. She went back downstairs and made a cup of tea and curled up in the big leather chair in her office and sat quietly thinking. At around 3:30 her body gave out and she fell asleep and not moving until 6:30 when she got up and started her day.
I watched her for a few minutes longer before I ran to my car to go home. I had to get ready for class, but more importantly I had an angel to watch over. I was determined to do everything in my power to not allow something like what happened yesterday to happen to her again. She wouldn't know it, but I would be her protector in every way that I could. I hoped she would allow me in her life so I could offer her protection from everything she feared and all the demons that plagued her.
So are you happy with their first meeting? I had more reviews for the last chapter then any other. THANK you! So many of you wanted to tell me your thoughts about them meeting. Now tell me if the meeting was as you thought? better? or worse?
As you know I don't own these character, SM does. I just am playing with them for a while.
My thanks to MidniteSerenade for beta'ing for me, keeping me on track and basically making sure I behave. Thanks to Hev99 for listening to my ramblings about vampires and what they should and shouldn't be able to do. Lastly to all the forum girls, Hev99, 4StringQueen, Lorilei, and BellaEdwardCullen you guys make me smile, come join us as see how crazy we all are, link in my profile.
Do you want to see the outfit that poor Edward was stressing over? I have a link to a picture in my profile!
This week I am rec'ing multiple stories by Padme-And-Anikin-4-Ever. She had 3 stories I am currently reading, Silence, The Vampire in the Attic, and Tainted Innocence. All 3 are wonderful, so go read!
Thank you for all that are reading. Each week more of you are adding this story to alerts or favorites and I do a fan girl squeal for each one. A special thank you to all that have reviewed and let me know your thoughts I hope you are liking the teasers.