Steve's Turn

Chapter 10

While Catherine is getting her CAT scan and we are all sitting around waiting, just hoping and praying for her recovery. I am so conflicted, I want to celebrate the birth of my children, but my heart is breaking with worry about my wife. My mind wanders back to another time she was in the hospital and how scared we all were and how she survived it all. My Cat is the most amazing person I know, and she is so strong that I know without her strength I wouldn't have made it through so much in my life.

We were in Washington, D.C. on January 3, 2009 for Kara and Mitch's wedding and the week started out so great and ended so badly. Cath and I had been together almost two years by then, and our lives seemed just perfect. We both were in the Navy, our careers were going well and we were so very much in love and enjoying the time we had together. Catherine and I were both in the wedding party so we scheduled our arrival for Tuesday, December 30, 2008 so we had some time to meet the other attendants and visit with Kara and Mitch's families. Thursday we had a joint Bachelor/Bachelorette party at the hotel restaurant and bar where we all were staying. We didn't do the stripper type of parties, just all of their friends sharing stories about them and having lots of toasts to the happy couple and getting to know each other. Both Kara and Mitch had some of their childhood friends in the wedding party and it was the only opportunity all of us had to spend time together. Cath and I hadn't seen each other for about 3 months because I was in the Middle East on a special OP where I was going after some political officials that were holding some Americans hostages. Cath was on the Enterprise not far from me but we both had our jobs to do so we only could email or call if we had the time. We both flew in on Tuesday and had 10 days off to spend together after the wedding festivities were over.

Catherine arrived in the morning and I was scheduled to arrive later in the afternoon. Catherine had told me she wasn't feeling very well and she told she was getting a cold and instead of waiting for my plane, she texted me that she was going to go to the hotel. She checked into our room and started decorating it for a surprise for me. She put pink and blue streamers all over, and hung baby items from the ceiling….she had a rattle, pacifier, bottle, diapers, toys, and much more baby things. She wanted to tell me she was pregnant and wanted to make it really special. We hadn't planned on getting pregnant before we were even engaged, but when you're away from the one you love, and have just happen to get 24 hours together unexpectedly, sometimes birth control isn't the first thing on your mind. Cath was having trouble with spotting with her IUD so she decided to try the Depo shot instead. The first month she was on the shot, we should have used a condom to prevent a pregnancy, but we didn't care if she got pregnant or not. We didn't think we were going to see each other, so it wasn't on our mind at all. Five minutes after I landed we were making love and pregnancy wasn't the last thing on our mind. We were just so happy to see one another and that was all that mattered. We weren't trying, but we weren't going to use condoms since we hadn't used condoms for 18 months. Since we knew we were committed to each other and planning getting married in the not so distant future, neither one of us would be upset if we got pregnant and then got married. It wasn't how we had thought it would go, but if it happened that way, it was ok with us as long as the baby was healthy. Anyway, Cath had Kara come to our suite and take a photo of her showing her stomach from the side and holding a sign that said Hi Daddy, I love you! Me and Mommy 3 months and she put it in a small 3x5 photo album that she gave to me and was planning on sending me new photos every month while we were apart. My wife is so thoughtful and she spoils me all the time with gifts that touch my heart. I told you, she is the perfect woman. She also made a card with her first ultrasound photo on the front that she had done at two months. Inside the card, she wrote some really private and love filled sentiments and wrote a poem and it was and still is one of my favorite cards to this day.

When I got to the hotel, I was a little early since my plane was actually on time, and not late like Catherine thought it would be. Since she was the time change and was tired and she was taking a nap and wasn't awake when I got there. I walked into the suite, and saw how beautifully she had it decorated, I was just blown away and woke her from her nap with sweet passionate kisses to her lips. To tell you the truth, I was totally shocked that she was pregnant, because I had forgotten about the 24 hours we were together on her ship when she came into the Middle East. We made love many times in those 24 hours, and I didn't remember she wasn't using her IUD at the time. She handed me the album wrapped in gift wrap of little baby boys and girls, and it was the sweetest thing I had ever seen. Once I saw the ultrasound and her photo, I couldn't stop the tears from running down my cheeks. I am not usually an emotional guy, but anything to do with Cath, or our family, I can be a mess when I am caught off guard. If my Seal friends ever found out, they would never let me hear the end of it.

We decided not to tell any of our friends that week since we were all there to celebrate Mitch and Kara's big day. We had talked about getting engaged, and I was all ready planning something for the next month when we were going to be in Dubai for two weeks. I decided to stick with my plan instead of moving it up just because she was pregnant. The wedding festivities went off without a hitch and we had the best time seeing old friends from Naval Intelligence and my Seal team. My dad was there, and Cath's parents were there, so we had the opportunity to tell them about the baby. We had planned on having dinner out on Sunday night before our parents had to leave to go back to Hawaii. Since I totally loved the photo and card Cath gave me, we decided to do the same thing for my dad and her parents. I took a photo of her holding a sign that said "Hi Grandpa John" and one that said "Hi Papa Ed and Gamma Marie". We also made two copies of the ultrasound and put together a card for each of them.

We were the first to arrive at the restaurant and we seated a few minutes before 7:00 pm. I knew my dad was going to be arriving with Cath's parents so we were just waiting and talking about the baby. My dad and Catherine's parents had gotten to know each other over the last two years since they knew how serious we were. Every time we were both home at the same time, we always had our parents to our place for dinner so they would get to know each other. Cath's parents knew my dad was alone and invited him to their place once a week for dinner, and I can't tell you how much I appreciated them doing that. It's obvious where Catherine gets her big heart and kindness because that is exactly how her parents are. Cath excused herself to go to the restroom because she was all ready having to go to the bathroom more often and I stayed at the table. Even though Catherine is a trained naval officer and could defend herself, she was caught off guard when two men with guns grabbed her and pulled her into the men's room, locked the door and attacked her. They covered her mouth with duct tape and they had masks on and one held her down while the other one tried to sexually assault her. She was gone for about ten minutes when I went looking for her. My dad and her parents were all ready at the table, so I told them to stay there while I went to see what was taking so long. I was concerned that she may have been getting nauseous because certain smells didn't agree with her lately she told me. During the attack, the first perp tried to penetrate her but she managed to take him down when she took his penis and yanked so hard with both hands that she broke the cartilage inside that left it just hanging on by the skin (That's my girl). He was left on the ground in agony trying not to make any noise that would call attention to the attack and bring someone to help her. The other guy was so pissed that when he tried to do the same, she kicked him in the groin so hard that she left a horrendous bruise in the shape of her left boot on his body. He retaliated and kicked her so hard in her abdomen and beat her until she was unconscious. As soon as she was out, they took off their masks, and walked out through the back door like nothing had happened and thought they hadn't been seen by anyone.

Less than a minute later, I just arrived at the ladies room and was knocking on it and calling her name, when a man started to go into the men's room and came out and yelled "Help, call 911, there's a woman down in here." I don't know why but my first thought was that it was Cath and when I ran in and saw it was her, I lost it. I had to put aside my emotions and put my medical training into effect and see what I could do for my Catherine. I asked the man to call m911 and to go get my dad and he came in and helped me with Cath while we waited for the paramedics. She was bleeding badly from a head wound, and it looked like she had a broken arm and a few broken ribs. She wasn't wearing any panties, and I knew that those bastards had assaulted her in the worst way imaginable. I took off my suit jacket and covered her up and my dad gave me his jacket for her head. I didn't have time to think about the baby, all I could worry about was keeping her alive until the ambulance got there. Once I put pressure on her head wound, I had my dad go get her parents and tell them what happened. I let her mom go with her in the ambulance and her dad drove me and my dad to the hospital. As much as I wanted to be with her in the ambulance, I thought she would feel more at ease if she woke up and it was her mom with her, not her boyfriend.

The Washington P.D. started the investigation and I asked them to call Naval Intelligence since the attack could have been related to her being in the Navy. Luckily for Cath, two of my good friends were at the wedding and I was able to give them the info we had so far, and they took over the investigation. Retired Marine Gunnery Sergeant Jethro Gibbs from NCIS in D.C. and Ret. Chief Petty Officer Sam Hanna, my former Seal team member, now with NCIS Los Angeles, were able to interrogate the perps once they went to a hospital and I am certain they convinced them to plead guilty or they would never feel safe again in their life. The Navy is a really strong family and Catherine is well respected and my friends were going to anything they could to help keep Catherine from testifying at a trail. Getting them to plead guilty was the best outcome we could hope for. All of our fellow officers and anyone who knows us, would do whatever they could to protect her. Everyone knew what a trial would do to her and her career and no one wanted that to happen. By informing the perps that it was best for them to take the deal being offered, Cath wasn't needed as a witness. Any woman who has been through a trial for sexual assault can tell you that it can sometimes feel like you're being assaulted again but this time by the system. The assailants were so stupid that they threw their masks away in the dumpster behind the restaurant, and they were used to match to the DNA Cath had under her nails and from the rape kit.

When we arrived at the hospital 15 minutes later, she was already in the ER and was having a nurse and officer do a rape exam and rape kit on her while the ER doctor was checking out her other injuries. While in the ambulance, she came to for a few minutes and told her mom what injuries she caused to the bastards who attacked her. She also told her she scratched each one with a different hand so not to contaminate their DNA. Catherine was smart enough to keeep a level head and scratch both assailants and she had trace DNA under her nails. Luckily for us, that was used to put those psychos away for a long, long, time. She was in the ER for about two hours and she never woke up again. The doctor said she had a bad concussion, but no bleeding of the brain. They didn't know if they could save the baby as she was so badly kicked, she had internal bleeding. When they finally took her to surgery, her parents and I told the doctor that if she was starting to miscarry, and trying to save the child could cost Catherine her life, there was no choice but to save Catherine, even if that meant she would have to have a hysterectomy. As much as I knew she wanted children, her life was more important, and there are so many children who need homes, that we would have our family no matter what. Luckily for us, she didn't need a hysterectomy but unfortunately, she did lose the baby that evening. She had two broken ribs, a broken left arm, a ruptured spleen, a punctured lung and needed 25 stitches in her head from where one of the boots had caused a two inch gash near her left ear. The doctor said the reason she had such a bad break on her arm was that she wouldn't move her arm away from her abdomen while being kicked because she was trying to protect the baby. He said the break was so severe that it looked like something had broken it in half with a great deal of force. She's had three surgeries for it and it still gives her trouble now and then when she over uses it.

She came out of surgery at 2:00 am and one of us stayed with her and never left her side. I asked my dad to keep in touch with the P.D. officer in charge, and also speak with the Navy while I was with Cath and her parents. Sometime around midnight, one of the assailants went to another ER to have his penis looked at and was arrested and gave up his friend who went to still another hospital for his groin injury. As soon as the ER doctor at that hospital saw a boot print on him, he knew he was one of the men who attacked Cath. All the ER's in the surrounding area were at sent a police bulletin informing them of the attempted rape and what injuries to look for it those bastards came in for medical treatment. Catherine was smart enough to know that any injury she caused that could be tied to her attack was a sure way to convict them.

Catherine had to testify six months later at their sentencing hearing because both pled guilty to assault and attempted rape and since they were in the Marines, they both were also court martialed and given dishonorable discharges. The DA wanted to charge them with manslaughter for the life of our baby, but they used that as a plea bargain to get the guilty verdict. Catherine didn't completely wake up until the next day around 9:00 pm and we were all so happy because we didn't know if she would, and if she would have any brain damage. She was in the hospital for ten days and then she was home in Oahu staying with her parents for another four months. She was terrified of certain men's voices, loud noises, small enclosed places, and any time she heard a baby cry, she broke down. She had terrible nightmares and I was so worried about her that I wanted to take a leave of absence to take care of her but she wouldn't let me. She knew her mom and dad could take good care of her, and she knew how important it was for me to track down the Hess Brothers and wanted me to focus on that. When she was ready to move back into our apartment, I took three months leave to help her with the transition. She also joined a rape crisis group and I went with her to some of her meetings.

I knew how hard it was going to be for her to let me hold her again, and I knew making love was something that was going to take time and lots of patience on both of our parts. We both knew that our love was so strong that we could survive this and we did. Catherine wasn't going to give her power away to those men and took control of her recovery and I can't tell you how proud I was of her. Those three months were a good transition for her back to our life together. She needed me to hold her when she was frightened but it was scary for her to be touched by anyone. I knew it wasn't me she was afraid of; it was the memories of what happened when we tried to get close and make love to each other. Intellectually she knew the difference between my touch and the attackera, but since she was left so exposed, it is sometimes difficult to separate the two. I talked to her counselor and she gave me some good exercises to do with Cath that we did that helped her grow stronger and relearn that my touch was in love and not like the men who attacked her. I thought I had seen brave people in the Navy but none of them can compete with what my Cath had to endure. I think I loved her more each day as I watched her take back her life during those three months. She was trying so hard to get better because she wanted to be able to make love before my leave was up but I told her not to put pressure on herself. It was more important for her to heal than to get back to our physical relationship. I knew she was longing to be held and touched by me because of the love we shared, and we both had to relearn how to get there from where she was. She still had pain from her broken arm and all the physical therapy she had to endure so we had to work around that as well.

Since I wasn't with her for the first four months, she met with a rape counselor and had weekly sessions. They worked really hard and when we were finally back in our apartment, she wasn't afraid to let me hold her, kiss her and we even we able to shower together to help her regain her want to explore my body again and let me do the same. I let her take control of my touch, my kisses, and how she wanted to be held. It was a slow process, but it was worth it and by the last week of my leave, she was ready to try to make love again. She made the first move by putting on sexy lingerie that she had bought just for the occasion and was waiting for me in our room. I had gone over to my dad's to pick up an antique dresser of my mom's that he wanted to give me and Catherine. I stayed a little longer than I expected because he wanted to give me a chance to talk about how things were going, and let him know what support Catherine would need once I went back on my mission. Catherine had been given a temporary assigned at Pearl while she was still working with her therapist and going physical therapy for her badly broken arm. She hadn't passed all her physicals and assessments that she needed to go back to the Enterprise, so she was going to be at Pearl on modified duty. Her parents had moved to Kauai seven months after her attack and I wanted my dad to keep an eye out for her for me.

While I was at my dad's, she sent me a text that said she was going to bed early, and wanted me home asap because she had a surprise waiting for me in our bedroom. She had a photo of herself in her new lingerie and that was all I needed. God my wife is so beautiful on the inside and the outside. I remember thinking the exact same thing the first time I laid eyes on her two years ago. I rushed home to her and we had the best time loving each other's bodies again and making love like we always had. I let Catherine call all the shots. She put her arms around my neck and pressed her body against mine. Her skin was so soft and it felt so good to hold her. She started to undress me and then she asked me to do the same to her. Once we were both naked, she wanted us to touch each other and the more we caressed each other, the more we felt like we were making love again for the first time. It was so special and I knew how lucky I was to be in her life and she could trust me again. From that night forward, our sex life was just like before the attack happened and I had my precious Catherine back.

She had lost part of her sense of safety and security and finally reached a conclusion and couldn't imagine going back on the ship with 2000 men. Eventually she asked to have her assignment at Pearl made permanent and it was granted the next month. We had cancelled our trip to Dubai for March when she was attacked and were going to reschedule when she was up for it. Seven months after the attack, August 2009, we had our vacation to Dubai and I asked her to marry me. We decided to have a small beach wedding at my dad's house on 10/10/10 and were looking forward to the planning and I wanted her to have everything she had dreamed of. We both knew this was going to be our one and only wedding, but it was more important to us to plan a strong marriage as well as a great wedding. So many people put too much emphasis on the big party with their friends, and not on the marriage and we were not going to make that mistake. We went to pre-marriage counseling every time I was in town and the exercises we did really gave us clear picture of what marriage is all about. It also helped that we were far apart for awhile and we could spend time writing each other love letters, writing down our dreams, expectations, and plans for children. There are additional stresses on a marriage when one or both are in the military and we wanted to do everything we could to protect our love and have a solid and happy marriage. Little did I know she was planning on leaving active service once we got married, so the stress wouldn't only be half of what we had expected with me being the only one in the military. As it turned out, I took the job with Five-0 so we were able to live together in the same place as soon as we got back from our honeymoon. While we were planning the wedding, I came across a beautiful song that I wanted to be the first song we danced to at our wedding. The song is called "True Companion" and it is sung by Marc Cohn. ***

All the plans for the wedding were done and she let me plan the honeymoon and was going to surprise Catherine by taking her to Bora Bora since neither of had ever been there. On September 20, 2010, I was in Pohang, South Korea after capturing Anton Hess when I received a call from my dad who was being held prisoner by Victor Hess, Anton's brother. He wanted to exchange my dad for his brother which I knew I couldn't do. Hess sent his helicopter to attack our convoy and his brother was killed during the gun fight. As soon as he figured out Anton was dead, he shot my father in the head while I listened on the phone. After I got home for the funeral and accepted the job as head of Five-0 Cath helped me get through the pain and anger I felt. Catherine hadn't been home when my dad was killed. She and her CO were speaking at a seminar at the Pentagon and she didn't get back until the day after the funeral. She was scheduled to take the red eye and land the morning of the funeral, but bad weather on the east coast wouldn't let her flight take off until the winds had died down. She wanted to postpone the wedding but I wouldn't let her because my dad was so looking forward to having her as a McGarrett that I knew he and my mom would be smiling down on us on our wedding day on the beach behind there home...soon to become our home. I was so distraught after my dad was killed but the closer we got to the wedding date, the happier I was becoming. Catherine was more beautiful that day then I have ever seen her and I was finally happy again because I had a family again. It was a small family, me, Catherine, and MaryAnn, but it was a start. Now here I sit the father of a baby boy and baby girl, waiting for my wife to wake up and come back to us.

Catherine was afraid to try to get pregnant again after we were married. She knew that I wanted to have children with her, but I told her that she would dictate the time and I was happy with any amount of children we would have. She went off the shots in early 2011, and in August of 2011, she got pregnant.

Waiting for Catherine to recover from brain surgery after giving birth to the twins was so hard on all of us. I hope that I haven't used up all the favors God will give me. I haven't prayed so hard in my life. I know what it is like to grow up with a mom and dad that love you, and my children deserved the same. Losing my mom at 15 was hard enough, but my chioldren can't and won't lose their mom now. Between me, Danny, her parents, Dorian, MaryAnn and the nurses, someone was always with the babies to feed them since Catherine still wasn't awake.

"Hey Steve, any news about Catherine?" Danny asked while she was still in surgery.

"Not yet, Danny. Thanks for picking up MaryAnn. Where is she?"

"She went straight to the nursery to see the babies so that I could come check on you. Have you eaten anything today? You know you need to keep up your strength so you can be strong and help Catherine while she is still recovering from two surgeries. Plus, being a mother to newborn twins, that is going to be harder than you can imagine. Steve, you know recovery from a C-Section really takes a toll on the mother, and then add brain surgery on top of that, she will be lucky if she can get out of bed in a month. Who is going to stay home with Catherine when MaryAnn goes back home in ten days? You should think about hiring a nurse so they can keep an eye on all three of them for at least the first month. Catherine will be on bed rest when she first comes home, and she will need all of us to help her." Danny tells me.

"Well before the brain surgery, we had planned on MaryAnn for the first week she's home, then her mom and dad were going to stay with us for two weeks, and by the third week I thought we could do it on our own. But that was when I thought there was only one baby and she hadn't had her mini stroke. I think I should get some names of nurses to set up some interviews. Maybe you could help me with that since you're the best dad I know and we could use your input. Did Rachel use a nurse when she had Charles? Maybe she can give us some names if she knows anyone good. Thanks for thinking of that Danny. You don't know how much having you here means to me, I know I couldn't get through any of it without my best friend. Where are Kono and Chin?"

"They went home and I told them I would call them. Since your security team is watching the twins, I told them to go get some rest since you will need us to keep Five-0 going while you take care of your family.

True Companion by Marc Cohn

Baby I've been searching like everybody else,

Can't say nothing different about myself.

Sometimes I'm an angel and sometimes I'm a cruel,

But when it comes to love, I'm just another fool.

Yes I'll climb a mountain

I'm gonna swim the sea

There ain't no act of God girl

Could keep you away from me.

My arms reaching out

Out across this canyon

I'm asking you to be my True Companion

True Companion, True Companion

So don't you dare and try to walk away

I've got my heart set on our wedding day

I've got this vision of a girl in white

Made my decision that it's you alright

When I take you hand

I'll watch my heart set sail

I'll take my trembling fingers

And life up your veil

Then I'll take you home and with wild abandon

Make love to you just like a true companion

You are my true companion I've got a true companion

True Companion

When the years have done irreparable harm

I can see us walking slowly arm and arm

Just like that couple on the corner do

Girl, I will always be in love with you.

When I look in your eyes

I'll still see that spark

Until the shadows fall

Until the room grows dark

Then when I leave this Earth

I'llbe with the angels standin'

I'll be out there waitin' for my True Companion

True Companion, True Companion