I was panting, sweating and couldn't hold my breath anymore. I kept screaming in my pillow, letting the tears wet the cloth. I tugged myself again and again, hurting my arms for I kept clenching my fingers into them.
Why?! Why does it have to happen?!!
…
KRIING, KRIING!! KRIING, KRIING!!
I heard the phone ring similar to the clock that I hated every morning. I didn't want to answer it. I wanted to sleep again. I wanted to be in darkness again. I wanted to see her again.
KRIING, KRIING!! KRIING, KRIING!!
But it kept ringing. I was expecting for the caller to give up but it didn't. The phone kept ringing and ringing…I got irritated.
"Urgh!!" I stood up and walked stomping my feet.
My face was red because of the force I putted on the pillow. It was drenched with sweat and cold tears. My eyes showed sadness and anger together.
I took the phone and didn't care if who the damn caller was. My hand almost destroyed the phone. My strength was too much for the phone so I knew it would break into pieces any second.
"WHAT DO YOU WANT??!!"
"Calm down, Sasuke." the caller had a familiar voice. "It's just me."
"WHAT DO YOU WANT??!!" I repeated.
"I want you to stop screaming. My eardrums will blow." he still spoke calmly.
"Sigh…" I calmed down, at least. Hearing my brother's voice, strangely, made me calm down a little bit. "What is it, Itachi? If it's about Sakura, I-"
"I didn't know you still cry, dear brother?"
"Itachi!!" I was feeling angry again. "I'm serious!!"
"I know you are." After his first sentence, he spoke in a different tone I've heard yesterday. "And yes, it's about Sakura-chan."
"…!" I couldn't speak after that. I wanted to ask him what happened but maybe something really did happen while I was killing myself a while ago.
"But there's always good news and bad news. So…what do you want first?"
"Good news."
"Sigh…Well, the good news is…well…"
"What is it, Itachi?!"
"Sakura woke up."
"Eh?!" my eyes widened again. Sakura…woke up. Isn't that great? Then why won't I shout for joy now? Why do I feel down all of the sudden as Itachi said the good news?
"But the bad news… Well, it isn't actually bad news for the Haruno family. Just bad…for you."
"Why?"
"Sakura-chan actually woke up at about midnight. She was crying, like you." The first thing that made me twitch.
"Her parents wanted her to calm down. I was there to witness everything. All we could see was she was crying. Tears won't stop coming from her eyes. Then, she was holding herself with both her arms, clenching her hands on her arms." The second thing that made me twitch.
"She kept shaking her head, screaming while crying. But then, we heard nothing from her mouth except your name, Sasuke. It really is true, huh? The two of you know each other."
"Of course we do!"
"Okay, okay. Do you want me to continue? You might cry again."
I grumbled.
"I guess that means yes, huh? Well here we go." he inhaled deeply. "Sakura-chan and her family are about to get out of this hospital today."
"Huh?!"
"But that's not the bad news for you. Actually, they aren't going home here in Kyoto. They're going to a different country. Far away from Japan, America."
"What?!?"
"Sasuke, the flight is an hour from now. If you want to see her before she goes, hurry and come back here, Sasuke. Run now!"
I didn't response. I let go the phone and ran outside. I was still wearing what I wore yesterday at Kyoto. I didn't want to miss this. I didn't want to miss her. I didn't want to let her go.
"If you want to see her before she goes, hurry and come back here, Sasuke. Run now!"
Itachi…huff, huff…I owe you one.
I ran. I jumped over things. I stumbled many several times. Those things happened just because of carelessness. But I considered it unlike hers. I didn't want her to leave me because she's careless. I didn't want her to leave me at all! I ran as fast I could. But where to? To the hospital or the airport? Itachi said an hour from the time he called. That was…5:30 a.m. I looked at my watch and…Shoot! It's already 6:15 a.m. I ran and ran and didn't look what's behind me. All I did was run. Sakura, Sakura…SAKURA!!!
…
"ITACHI!!!"
I clenched the fist I had holding his collar up. My eyes were already teary but I was still raged with anger. Itachi had pitied eyes looking away from me. But I didn't need pity. I needed her.
"TELL ME YOU'RE LYING!! TELL ME!!!" I kept shouting and tightening my fist on his shirt.
"I'm sorry, Sasuke. But…I'm not lying." his calm voice was now a sad one.
It's true. He wasn't lying. I asked every person that knows her, even the nurses and the doctors, including the person in front of me now. They told the same thing. Itachi showed me a paper of flights for this day and he wasn't lying again. I was just so desperate on coming here, and now…
"I'm really sorry, Sasuke. But she's gone… I really am." he finally closed his eyes.
Tears finally fell from my eyes. My hand soften its clench but still holding his shirt. I looked down and closed my eyes. My tears fell to the white tile that the both of us were standing. I felt Itachi's arm on my shoulder and started rubbing it slowly. I could feel his pity and sadness towards me. My head leaned on his chest and I started to cry like her. Itachi's arms wrapped my shoulders and whispered "I'm sorry." to me again and again. I kept crying and crying as Itachi's hug tightened itself. But it wasn't the hug I wanted. Besides, Uchiha Itachi isn't, and will never be, Haruno Sakura.
"Why?!" I kept repeating those words to myself again and again like I did this morning.
Itachi kept calming me but I cried so much I thought I was gonna faint again. It was almost an hour, I was still crying. It was a good thing that we were outside the hospital; it would've been embarrassing.
"Sasuke, go home now. You can't stay here in Kyoto forever…She's not coming back."
"I will see her again." I said softly.
"You're not gonna meet tonight even in your dreams."
"Eh?" I looked up at him.
"Sakura-chan met you when she got here. Not before she got here." Itachi cleared out.
My eyes closed again and I stood up. I walked away and didn't look back at him. I heard him stand up and said "Call me if you ever need anything."
Goodbye, Itachi.
"Goodbye, Sasuke…"
DAY 11
I went to school in the morning feeling nothing. My smile vanished from the previous days. I didn't talk to anybody even to Naruto and Kiba. I ate perfectly but I didn't taste anything. I drank water but my thirst wasn't satisfied. The bell rang normally and I stood up, as I should. I walked outside of the campus. I walk normally but my feet felt nothing. Nothing became normal to me anymore. I felt the same feeling again. The feeling of being alone and miserable. Being left out and left alone. That feeling came to me again.
But until those moments, I would've thought of the same thoughts again: killing myself and ending it all. But I didn't. I don't know why…
I came home but I didn't greet my parents. I ate. I took a bath. I wore the same pajamas I wore the first dream occurred. I lied down and closed my eyes, hoping to see her again just like a normal dream with her.
DARKNESS…
.
.
.
KRIIIING!!! KRIIIING!!!
Nothing.
I saw nothing but darkness. No sand to lie on. No ocean to feel. No sun to squint at. No trees to look at. No beach to see… No Sakura to hug and kiss. None.
DAY 12
…
Nothing again.
DAY 13
…
Nothing.
DAY 14
…
Nothing.
DAY 15
…
Nothing…
--
I wished nothing anymore. I didn't speak. I didn't laugh. I didn't smile. I didn't talk to my friends. Even my life was nothing now… Nothing without her.
I counted the days that passed. Every day was nothing…Nothing…
DAY 16…17…18…19…20… and on and on and on…
She didn't come back. Itachi came home. I didn't feel something when he arrived. Itachi kept cheering me up. It didn't work. I didn't became enthusiastic…
Again, I counted the days Itachi stayed, still no Sakura.
DAY 45…46…47…48…49…50… and on and on and on…
It was now a pink and blossoming season in Tokyo. Cherry Blossom trees blooming everywhere, it reminded me of her hair. But not just her hair, but her. Her every figure, I could still describe it. Her pink hair, her beautiful face, those emerald eyes that I always look, perfectly shaped nose, that kissable and red lips, and I could even remember that times her cheeks would turn pink. Her white dress that's perfect for a goddess, her flower bracelet, and now, I could imagine her hands with the ring I gave her. A cherry blossom on it suits her much better. She was mine and only mine… I loved her more than anything I could have. I could never compare her to any person I've met. She was…perfect.
"Sasuke…"
I was standing on a road filled with Cherry Blossom trees. From a distance, I heard my brother call me. I walked towards him and there, I saw him standing with a peculiar smile on his face.
"Come here, Sasuke. I want to tell you something." he said.
"What is it?" I said calmly, still no feeling.
"Cherry Blossoms…are nice, aren't they?"
"Yeah, they are." I still didn't smile.
"Ne, Sasuke. It's kinda weird for me to ask this, I know you'd say that. But, would you describe the days without…her?"
"I don't want to."
"Even just for one word. What do you feel when she's not here?" it's like he was begging for an answer.
"…"
"Come on. I have a surprise, you know?"
"I feel nothing."
"As suspected."
"What do you mean? You've never fallen in love before."
"Well, it's just, someone told me you would feel that way if Sakura-chan would go away like that." he looked at one of the trees beside us and smiled again.
"Naruto and Kiba?"
"How would they know about your mystery girl?"
"Good point."
"Well, figured it out?"
I looked away too.
"Sasuke, I have another question. Usually in stories, when the prince goes away, he comes back to save his princess, right? Then what if, the princess is the one who goes away, what would happen if the prince was in trouble?"
"The prince wouldn't be in trouble if he was strong. Then the princess wouldn't be worried too much." I answered.
"Then what if the princess comes back?" a voice said.
Huh? That voice…it seemed familiar. It wasn't Itachi's voice. But it was a sweet and innocent voice that made me smile. Hmm…I might be hallucinating again. I'm already thinking of Itachi's voice as hers.
"Sasuke-kun…"
"…!"
My eyes looked forward and saw a shadow far behind Itachi. But I saw Itachi smile again. It was a happy smile, I've never seen from him. But that wasn't the one that made my eyes widen. It was…It can't be.
"Sasuke…you're the prince in my question…" Itachi continued.
The shadow walked towards us and I saw slowly, each detail came out. It was a girl with short hair, wearing dress-like clothes with a small jacket. The first thing I saw was a smile. I soft and heart-warming smile that I felt I saw before. Then her hands on her chest like the way I know. Then slowly, I saw her white clothes bit with a pink small jacket. My eyes widened more when the figure was never a shadow but…a girl.
"And I'm the princess that came back for him, nee?"
I couldn't react. All I saw was pink and white and emerald. I saw Itachi move away so that I could walk forward. But I couldn't move. I was hypnotized by the smile I missed so much and those eyes filled with tears I always caught with my finger.
"N-no…it…it can't…be…"
"No, Sasuke-kun. I'm here. I'm back." and a tear fell from her eyes with a smile.
"S-S-S…Sakura…Sakura…"
I didn't notice she was already in front of me. So close, so near, so touchable, already here, beside me…
"Tadaima, Sasuke-kun."
She was there, in front of me… All I could do was, let a tear drop in my eye and smile then close my eyes and slowly move my arms towards her.
"I've missed you…" she said.
"Are you…real?" the same question before. When I asked if she was a dream or not.
"Yes. Yes I am."
"SAKURA!!!"
I hugged her with all I've got. I hugged her tight. I cried so much that I couldn't hear anything except her voice.
It's true. She was here. She was back. She was back in my arms. I guess, I was wrong about my answer. The princess would come back even if the prince was strong. But the prince was never strong…if his princess wasn't by his side. And now, she's here, wrapped by my arms. I felt whole again. I felt happy and glad. My savior came and she still loved me after a long time. I could see the ring from her finger, still the same way it was when I wore it to her. She kept our promise. She kept it always. She loved me until now…
"You kept my promise."
"I didn't, Sasuke-kun. I sealed it inside my heart."
"Will you love me always, Sakura?"
"Forever." she smiled like an angel.
"'Til death do us part?"
"No…I'll still love you even if we're in heaven."
I smiled back and leaned my lips to hers. We closed our eyes and intertwined our fingers. When we pulled away, we looked at each other like we always do.
"Sasuke-kun…"
"Sakura…"
"I love you…"
--
I've been alone since my parents died. I kept myself locked in my room everyday. My other classmates began to be "concerned" about me. They called me over and over again. I said, "thanks for the concern" but I still didn't want to go out. This happened for four months. After those months, I came out of the open but I was still silent. I was still alone. I never became attentive since that cursed day. I never smiled, I never laughed nor speak out loud. I only speak when I know it's needed. And once you know it, everybody became scared of me. That started my dark side. I never believed in anything positive anymore. None…
But everything changed because of a dream where I saw and met a girl that made things possible. With that occurrence on my life, her identity never faded from my memory. And because of the strange dreams every night with her, I finally recognize something that I missed in my life.
The name's Sasuke… Sasuke Haruno-Uchiha. And I bet you would always remember it, especially the middle part. 'Cause now, I'll never be alone. I'll never feel alone and be alone. I've got an amazing wife! Why wouldn't I be happy?
How would I describe her? Well, let's just say she's a dream come true, if you know what I mean. 'Cause even if she would be a dream, I'll do anything to make her exist in my life…'cause I want to spend my life always and forever with her.
Sorede, ja nee~