If you thought Ashley was crazy, then that's good I just wanted to show how Ashley hasn't had a good relationship with anyone and someone comes in to her life & wants her she gets "attached" to them. It also shows Ashley isn't perfect cuz in the begging she had no flaws but one of her flaws is being over attached to things or people. This is what Spencer did in that month when they went separated.
How it Should Be
Chap.10
Spencer looked at her buzzing phone; it was the third time this week Ashley called her. It was about a month since the time Spencer was a no show at the little meeting. Spencer told Ashley they would talk about it then but didn't have the courage to talk to her. Spencer would pain what to say to Ashley all the time, and would play out reactions in her head. Spencer dreamed about Ashley, normally little things like kissing her, or going up to her and talking to her about how she felt. Spencer know where Ashley's locker was. She would hide behind the side of the lockers, and tell herself she would tell Ashley how she felt. But would always end up just hiding there and watching her walk to her car.
Spencer once again stud behind the lockers again, 'I'm going to tell her, I'm going to tell her' Spencer told herself. Ashley's locker opened, Ashley swapped the books she had with ones she need for homework. The locker closed, and Ashley walked to her car. Spencer looked at Ashley like she had something to say, but then just sighed and walk to her owe car. Spencer drove home in silence. Spencer ran over her day in her head, she saw Ashley lunch. Spencer wanted to sit with her, but was just with Madison and the other cheer girls.
The month Spencer didn't talk to Ashley, Spencer spent finding out about Ashley. She asked the cheer girls' one said she was fucking sexy amazing. Others said she was super sweet, is really nice, funny, and so kind. Spencer found out he dad died when she was little; she has a half sister, and volunteers a lot. Spencer wanted to make sure Ashley was nothing like Carmen before she went through with going out with Ashley.
Spencer walked in her house and hung her jacket in the closet. Then walked up series and look at herself in the mirror. She then looked at her wrist; they had old scares from when Carmen hurt her. Spencer was the olds new scar. She rubbed it hard, and then started to pick at it up till it started to bleed. Spencer wanted it gone, off her arm for ever. Spencer ran in to the bathroom and took out a razor and cut the rest of the ugly scar off. Spencer wanted it gone; she wanted all memories of Carmen gone.
She only wanted to remember Ashley, only Ashley. When so got older she didn't want to remember in high school get beat, but want it to fill it with love. Not fear, not heat, not Carmen, but Ashley, desire, and love. The cut started to bleed and it felt good for Spencer to get rid of it, to be done with her. But the blood wouldn't stop; she put pressure on the cut. The cut now stung but after a few minutes it stopped. Spencer put a bandage on it and wiped the tiers away from her face.
"Spencer time for dinner." Glen yelled from the bottom of the steps.
Spencer wiped the last tear away, "Ok, Glen." She splashed water on her face and walked down the steps and know she was finally done with Carmen and will be able to be with Ashley now.
What did you think?
& I have a question for you guys I read this story some time ago. And wonder if anyone know what it is called.
Spencer and Ashley where dating and Paula caught them. She made Spencer go to therapy, and she let Ashley drop her off to the first one because she thought Ashley would be gone some. But the therapies said Spencer had nothing wrong with her. And in the end Spencer went to grope therapy because her mom didn't like the therapist, and Spencer wanted to go because she started cutting herself.