"It's not a real hand!" Jason cried, as if that was the most important thing. As if the fact that Damian was missing wasn't more worrisome, or the fact that Jason looked like a discount Santa from the $2 Shop of Hell.

No, of course the fake hand was more important!

(…Okay, considering who Jason was, and what he did on a nightly basis, perhaps confirming that it wasn't a real hand probably was a smart idea. Especially since he was standing in Batman's home, surrounded by irate Bat-family members).

But still. Damian was missing. And they needed to focus.

"Jason," Bruce ground out, while Dick continued his internal panic-attack, "what are you doing here, and what the hell are you wearing?!"

"Uh…" Jason let out an awkward laugh. "I thought I'd be nice for once, and leave some gifts for those little munchkins, Tim and Damian?"

It was phrased as more of a question than a statement. Even Dick, in his perpetual state of naivety and hopefulness — his brothers would get along someday! — wasn't about to believe that explanation.

"There's an arm," Cass said, pointing.

"Yes, but it's fake. See?" Jason picked it up, and waved it around. Dick heard Tim mutter a disbelieving, "oh my god," and didn't blame him one bit.

"And look, we all know how fucked up Demon Brat is. Regular toys aren't going to cut it for him."

Everyone continued to stare at him in disbelief.

"Look, I was trying to be nice, okay?! Aren't you always telling me to act like I'm part of the family? That's what I'm doing! Just get off my back assholes!"

And then, for good measure, Jason tossed the arm.

No one moved to pick it up.

"How did you get here?" Bruce demanded, his eyes narrowing.

Jason snorted. "Oh calm down old man, it's not like I broke a window or anything. Dick gave me a key." He nodded in Dick's direction.

The others turned to stare at Dick, disbelief in their eyes, and Dick shrugged. Jason was part of the family, he'd only thought it fair. And besides, Alfred looked approving, which was a pretty good indication of morality around here, right?

"I'm not an idiot," Bruce said, rubbing his forehead. "What are you really doing here?"

"I told you — "

"I'm not playing around here, dammit! Damian's missing and I want to know exactly what he's been telling you!"

Bruce's eyes flashed dangerously, and Dick realised how stressed he really was. He'd been so preoccupied with his own concern for Damian; it was easy to forget that Damian had other family members that were concerned about him too. Even Tim was worried; he tried to hide it, but Dick had always been good at reading his little brothers.

(Well, he liked to think so anyway).

"…Demon Brat's missing," Jason repeated, his eyebrows raising in surprise.

Bruce's glare deepened.

Jason shifted. "Look…it wasn't my fault, okay! If the kid was smarter, he wouldn't have fallen for it."

Dick's eyes narrowed. "What wasn't your fault?"

"Look — "

"Jason," Bruce growled, taking a threatening step forward, "you are going to sit down, and tell me everything — "

The phone chose that moment to ring, which was probably a good thing — Bruce looked furious, and Jason was starting to look more than a little defensive, and everyone knew that mixing Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd, and highly stressful situations, never ended well. It was like throwing a lit match into a puddle of gasoline, and expecting it to burst into rainbows and sparkles.

Bruce turned around and walked over to the phone. Dick turned to Jason, intending to give his brother a good chewing out — he loved all his brother's equally, but Damian was ten, and if Jason had done something to cause this…well, Dick wasn't going to let him off easy — when Bruce's alarmed voice met his ears.

"…yes, Damian Wayne is my son…what?! What do you mean he's in the hospital?!"

Dick felt his chest seize in terror.

...

Yes, Damian was in the hospital.

Yes, the family — including Dick — were on there way to said hospital, foiling Damian's supposedly full-proof plan to draw Santa Claus away from the family.

And yes he was going to be angry. Very angry. And no one ever liked an angry ten year old, yet alone an angry ten-year-old Damian Wayne.

But to understand how we'd gone from an innocent plan to run away from home (said no one ever), to hospitals, furious child assassins, and a fast-approaching Santa Claus, ready to whisk Dick off to the North Pole (at least in Damian's mind)…well to understand that, we'd have to start at the events from earlier that night.

While the Bat Family had been happily (in Dick's case) and grudgingly (in the case of everyone else) been watching Christmas movies, and devouring popcorn, Damian had made the first steps in his master escape plan.

Let's just say, the workers at the 24 hour 7-Eleven were not amused.

Damian had briefly considered spending the night at a place that was actually tolerable. He was sure Colin would be willing to let him stay for the night, and the nuns would probably be too busy fending off Santa Claus to notice an extra child in their orphanage. However, Damian didn't want to risk it; if his family noticed him missing (not that that was likely; he'd gone through great pains to hide his whereabouts), he didn't want to be in a predictable hideout. A random location like this one had seemed like the best idea.

That didn't mean he was happy about this. When all of this was over, and he was finally able to go home, Grayson had better be willing to show his appreciation. Damian had many demands, but perhaps a public declaration that Damian was his favourite brother, and Todd and Drake were useless buffoons, would suffice.

...

Damian may not have wanted to be here, but the workers at this unfortunate 24 hour 7-Eleven sure as hell didn't want him here either.

Wanda and Henry had wasted way too many years working in this damn convenience store, but it had never really struck them how bad it really was. And now…well, if they were forced to deal with this demon-in-a-child's-body (and his name was Damian apparently — how fitting was that?!), on Christmas Eve of all days, surely that was a sign that they needed to reassess their lives.

"He can't stay here!" Henry hissed from behind the counter, eyeing the Damian warily. "We cannot have a kid staying here all night!"

Wanda ignored him, and turned to Damian. "Honey, are you sure you're alright?" she called out.

"I told you, I'm not finished yet, woman!"

Both worker's cringed.

"You can't just stay here — " Henry tried.

"I'm not — I'm buying something." Damian took a slow sip of his Slurpee, and glanced at the chocolate isle. "I'm trying to decide between the Kit Kat and the Hershey's bar."

"Brat's been trying to 'decide' all night," Henry hissed. "Seriously Wan, I just want to get drunk and watch Christmas movies."

Wanda snorted. "Right, because that's not going to get us fired."

"No one comes around here at this time — not until this kid."

Henry shot Damian another irritated glance. Damian saw it, and took another exaggerated sip of his Slurpee.

"I can hear every word you're saying, by the way," he added, after dabbing his mouth gently with the sleeve of his top. "Oh, and perhaps this other chocolate will suit my palette more — "

"Oh, I'll show you what'll suit your palette, kid!"

"Henry!" Wanda snapped. Then, in a louder voice, she asked Damian, "alright hon do you want me to call your parents? It's a bit late for you to be out on your own."

Damian snorted. "My father has no qualms about what I do in my personal time."

Henry cringed again, and Wanda shot him a reproachful glance, as if to say, 'shut the hell up and let ME deal with this, you useless human being.'

"Well I'd feel better if I spoke to him," she told Damian gently. "Besides, you don't want to be spending Christmas Eve all by yourself do you?"

"And we don't want to be spending it with you," Henry grumbled.

Wanda nudged him sharply with her elbow.

Damian took another loud sip of his drink. "No need. I ran away from home. These taste terrible by the way."

Wanda's brow creased with genuine concern. As strange and unnerving as Damian was, he was still a kid. "Aw hon, you don't want to be having a fight with your folks on Christmas Eve."

Damian rolled his eyes. "I assure you, my relationship with my Father is fine. I plan on returning to the manor tomorrow morning. However, I cannot go home tonight, not with the fat man lurking around, searching for houses where children reside within.

He calmly took another sip of his Slurpee.

"…WHAT?!"

"Honey, what did you just say?!"

Damian sighed. "The fat man. Everyone knows about him."

(Perhaps if Damian had specified that he was speaking about Santa Claus, it would have cleared up a lot of confusion. It would also have put forth the question of which adult in this kid's life had screwed him up the most).

"Someone's trying to hurt you, kid?" Henry asked, sounding genuinely concerned for the first time.

"No," Damian replied, scowling. "I'm far too skilled for some overweight fool, with no real weapons, to defeat. I'm simply trying to protect my brother from the deluding ways of this serial molester, and the entire family from the ghastly aftermath."

"Did you say serial molester?!"

"Yes," Damian said calmly.

Wanda's eyes bugged. "Oh god, hon, if you want us to call the cops — "

"The police?" Damian snorted. "That won't be of any use — if the police were competent, surely they would have caught him by now. Even Batman hasn't managed to apprehend this fellow."

The last part was said in a particularly bitter tone. The two worker's supposed that the kid was probably a Batman fan. As if he needed a broody role model to look up to — kid seemed to be doing fine in that regard all on his own.

"Look, kid, if you think you're in trouble — "

"Are you a complete fool?! I said no one is after me! It is my brother the old fool wants!"

"Yeah but — "

This conversation probably would have continued for a lot longer, and probably would have ended either in violence (Damian), storming out (Damian), or lots of screaming (from both sides), if the armed robber hadn't chosen that moment to walk in.

…Yes. The armed robber. As if things weren't bad enough as they were.

...

"Right, empty the till and give me the fucking money, and no one gets hurt!"

Damian turned in surprise, while the two idiots behind him let out identical shrieks of terror. Damian's eyes narrowed sharply when he caught sight of the man in the doorway, a black mask pulled over his face, and a gun in his hand, and thought, 'oh, I know EXACTLY what's going on here.'

"Okay!" the idiot woman stammered, "calm down, no one needs to get hurt — "

Damian scoffed. Please. This fool waltzes in here, thinking he has the strength to best Damian Wayne, son of Batman, son of Talia al Ghul, heir of the Demon, Robin — but Damian knew better. He knew how the old man's mind worked, and he should have expected something like this. Did he honestly think Santa Claus would just let him go? When there was a prize like Grayson waiting in the manor?

Well, Damian would show that old fool exactly who he was dealing with.

Damian stepped forward, ignoring the idiots' frantic yells. The gunman peered down at him, surprised. Clearly he hadn't been expecting any opposition. The naive fool.

"I suppose the old man sent you after me," he spat, is eyes narrowing.

The man blinked. "What? No, I just want the money — "

"You tell your boss that he will never have Grayson, as long as I am alive!"

"Who the fuck is Grayson?! I just want my money!"

And with that, Damian let out an enraged yell, and threw himself at the man. He knew his Father would probably discourage such a rash move, but he simply didn't have the time to think up a better plan. All Damian knew was, he needed to stay far away from the manor for as long as possible. Grayson was counting on it and — goddammit, Grayson deserved this. After everything he had done for Damian, after being the first person to believe in him, the first person to care about him, Grayson deserved this.

"OH MY GOD, WHAT IS HE DOING?! OH MY GOD YOU FUCKING PSYCHOPATH, STOP, WANDA, TELL HIM TO STOP — OH MY GOD, I THINK I JUST PISSED MYSELF — "

And the gun went off.

...

"Dammit, I want to leave!" Damian snarled, struggling furiously on the ambulance gurney. "I am completely fine! The bullet just grazed my arm!"

"Come on, this isn't fair!" the gunman protested, as he was escorted into a police cruiser. "I wasn't actually going to shoot anyone, that crazy kid jumped me! If anyone's a menace, it's him!"

Wanda and Henry watched on in stunned silence.

"We don't get paid enough for this," Wanda whispered.

Henry sniffed. "It's Christmas Eve, dammit."

A polite cough caught their attention, and reminded them that Officer Something-or-Another was still trying to take their statement. Of course, amongst the constant rambling-fits, switching trains of thought, and disbelieving exclamations, it wasn't an easy fete.

"Do you mind telling me what happened tonight?" the officer pressed.

"The kid's insane, that's what happened!" Henry snapped.

The officer blinked. "The kid. The little boy, who just got shot."

"It grazed my arm, dammit! I am completely fine!"

The officer sighed.

Wanda swallowed, still looking pale. "That man walked in, and started demanding that we hand over all the money we had," she said shakily. "And then that kid — Damian — well, he jumped on him. And then the gun went off I think."

"The kid has been hanging around all night," Henry added. "Might be one of those homeless kids, or something."

The officer scribbled something on his notepad, and then glanced up. "Actually, that's Bruce Wayne's kid."

Henry and Wanda gawked.

"…I always knew the rich ones were crazy."

AN:

Okay, so while I intended to have the Batfam find out in this chapter, I've decided to move that to the next chap. The next chapter WILL be the last one, and will wrap everything up. It'll also hopefully include some Batfam fluff at the end haha.

Hopefully you enjoyed this, and tell me what you think!

Also, since this is October, and Halloween is fast approaching (yay!) I've decided to write a series of Halloween-themed Batman fanfics throughout this month. If you have any prompts for this, send me a message, or post them in the comments! Anything Halloween-themed, or of the horror genre is welcome :)