FINALLY! It's here! the last night before the games!
That night I was sitting on the roof, again, panicking and stressing. Saying my 'goodbyes' to the world, listening to the parade, below, the excited cheers of innocent children and their parents. I wanted to go home.
Everyone did. No one in the hotel was sleeping. I could hear muffled conversations from below me.
Edward came out and sat next to me on the rail, feet dangling over, Like before.
"What is fearless, Taylor?" he asked me again.
I thought for a while, debating the options
"Fearless isn't being 100% not fearfull, it's being terrified, but you jump anyway."
"Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again...even though every time you've tried before you've lost." He said back.
"Fearless is not the absence of fear. It's not being completely unafraid. Fearless is having fears. Fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. Fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death." I nodded back.
"Fearless is you." He said, looking up at the stars
"And you, Edward."
We paused, looking into the night and the city and the waves of excitement radiating off of the capitol streets, capturing the scene of the moment, a moment which would never happen again.
"We could win, Edward"
"Yeah, right." He said, in disbelief.
"Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I've begun to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything." I said, after a while
A tear rolled down my cheek.
"You're crying again," he said "why?"
"Again, what's not to cry about? It's our last night before the games."
The muffled voices from district 12 got louder as they cried together. I wanted Edward to comfort me, but he just sat there, with no expression, not words, nothing.
The night began to get darker, and there were no lights on the roof. The only way to see was from the glinting street lights and the moon.
The parade was still going on and was louder than ever. It was annoying how these people supported the deaths of 23 innocent children.
"Taylor, what's so good about writing music?" he asked me
"people haven't always been there for me, but music always has."