It was the last week of classes before the week of final exams, so both Tegan and Sara had found themselves needing more time to commit to studying and final projects. Because Tegan only needed her laptop, books, and notes while Sara needed a significant number of larger art supplies, they agreed to meet at Sara's apartment on Monday.
With the bus ride, Tegan arrived at Sara's building close to 5:30pm. She double checked her text to make sure she had the right one before entering the main front door. The apartments in this building opened to a common indoor hallway, so Tegan removed her gloves as she climbed the stairs to the third floor. There were two doors to her left and two to her right, but the 11 on one caught her attention. Taking a deep breath, she stood in front of the door and knocked.
"Coming!" Sara yelled from inside. Within moments, Tegan was ushered inside and greeted with a lingering kiss as soon as the door closed behind her.
"Mmm. A girl could get used to that." Tegan grinned into Sara's lips.
"A girl should get used to that," Sara corrected before kissing her again.
The week flew by in a mess of paper and paint. By Friday afternoon, all they had left was studying for three finals each. When Tegan arrived, Sara was finishing the stir fry she made for dinner. After dropping her things by the door, Tegan went to Sara, still at the stove turning off the burners and moving the pans to the cool ones. She wrapped her arms around Sara's middle, rested her head on her shoulder, and nuzzled into her neck, closing her eyes. Sara's head lolled back onto Tegan's shoulder.
"Mmm. I missed you." Tegan allowed her lips to brush Sara's skin as she spoke. Sara giggled and turned around in her arms, placing her hands on Tegan's hips.
"You just saw me yesterday. You've been over all week," Sara grinned.
"Yeah, but we were both doing homework and shit all week. We didn't have any time to talk or cuddle." Tegan pouted her lower lip out. Sara took the protruding lip between her own and lightly sucked, grazing over it with her tongue. When she pulled back, Tegan's eyes were shut and her mouth hung open slightly.
"Come on, let's eat. Then we can cuddle all you like." Sara gave Tegan a quick peck on the cheek.
"Fine," Tegan huffed. "But only because you cooked it, and your food is so good. If we had ordered pizza again, it'd be getting cold while we got warm." She nuzzled back into Sara's neck with a smile. Sara squeezed Tegan's hips before gently pushing her away.
"It's going to get cold if you don't let me go," Sara giggled. She prepared two plates and put them on the small table where they sat and ate.
During their meal, Sara pondered over their week. Part of her was grateful that the last few days were filled with schoolwork. She was able to work through some of her thoughts on their relationship, both emotional and physical, without the added stress of figuring it out while continuing at the same pace as the previous week. She didn't regret anything, from how far they had gone physically, to becoming girlfriends and coming out as gay, nor did she regret how fast they had done these things. However, she did want some time to process it all. This was still her first time with everything.
Understanding what made her nervous was the main part of Sara's contemplation of the physical side of their relationship. She definitely did not feel too young, and obviously pregnancy wasn't even a possibility. Now that she had a much more solid notion of her sexuality, that wasn't holding her back. Sara decided that it was her lack of experience – in particular, Tegan's relative wealth of experience in comparison – that concerned her most. Sara had no doubt that Tegan would easily please her in bed, but other than mimicking Tegan's actions, Sara had no clue how to please Tegan.
Also, the question Sara had that would potentially be most awkward was how to be safe. She knew the standard things from sex ed in high school, but that was exclusively related to straight sex. Condoms were emphasized to prevent STIs and pregnancy. She had no idea how to translate what she had been taught to lesbian sex. However, if they were both negative for STIs, Sara didn't think protection would be necessary, unless she was overlooking something.
"Tegan, can I ask you something?" Sara decided it would be better to discuss this now, before they went any further. Tegan swallowed her bite, remembering choking on her pizza just a week ago when Sara had said nearly the same thing. Putting down her fork, she nodded for Sara to continue. "Have you been tested?"
"Like for STDs or whatever?" Tegan was immediately thankful of her choice in not taking another bite.
"Yeah," Sara nodded.
"Um, yeah. I go to the campus clinic for my Pap smears, and they do a full line up on pretty much anyone who walks in the door. Have you been tested?" Tegan raised an eyebrow and grinned. She trusted that Sara was telling the truth about not having been with anyone before, but it was a valid question.
"That's the 'full battery of tests' they ask you about, right?" Sara asked.
"Yup. Everything at the clinic is free to students, so they like to do as much as they can with everyone. Have you gone there?" Tegan's mother was a nurse and had worked at Planned Parenthood since Tegan was little, and she had done some volunteering there on summer breaks since she was 16. The campus clinic was one of the first places she familiarized herself with when she had started school here. The fact that Sara had started this conversation thrilled Tegan. She had always been the one to bring it up in the past, and no one ever seemed very excited about discussing it.
"Yeah. I heard they get more funding when they do more tests. Like, it shows they're more needed or whatever? So I just let them do everything they want when I go. I mean, I've only gone twice, but the last time was in September." Sara's first visit was a year ago. She had managed to get a yeast infection, which the nurse had said can happen when certain things occur or, as the nurse put it, 'sometimes just because you have a vagina'. Because she wasn't sexually active, they set her up with an appointment for her first pap smear after her 21st birthday in August, which was her second visit. "But I don't know where the papers from that are."
"I can show you!" Tegan's eyes lit up. "They put everything online. Have you accessed your account on their site?"
"No? I don't think I have." Sara shook her head. Tegan put their empty plates in the sink and grabbed her laptop.
"Here. I'll show you mine, then we can set up yours." Tegan sat on the couch and waited for Sara to join. She went to her bookmark for the clinic's website. "Since I have an account, I just log in, go here, under this tab you can click 'records', and that's a list of your visits with the most recent at the top. You can click each to get anything you need, like test results. Obviously, things don't go up here until they talk to you first, in case something is positive, but it's all here after that." Tegan clicked on the link for her last visit, which showed 'negative' next to a long list of STIs. "This was October, so I should still be negative, unless you have something that can be transmitted through kissing...or dry humping." Tegan smirked.
"Oh my god..." Sara covered her face with a hand at the mention of 'dry humping', causing Tegan to laugh.
"Come on." Tegan nudged Sara's shoulder with her own. "Let's set up your account." She logged out and went to the registration page. "Here, type in your info." Sara took the laptop from Tegan, still avoiding eye contact. After she filled out the forms, she logged into her new account and followed the steps Tegan had showed her. The record from September was nearly identical to Tegan's; the same list of tests with 'negative' next to each.
"Well that's convenient." Sara scanned over the list of things she had been tested for, as she hadn't paid a lot of attention before. This was much more relevant to her now that she was seriously considering having sex with someone.
"Uh huh. You can check your vaccination records, any tests, all of it. You have to go in if you need any official paper stating that you've had whatever shots or tests, but you can unofficially check pretty much your whole medical history that the clinic knows about." Tegan knew that she was in 'information-giving' mode, like when she was a volunteer, but she decided to roll with it. "Do you have any other questions?"
"Yeah. Do you work for the clinic or something?" Sara grinned.
"No," Tegan laughed. "I told you my mom works at Planned Parenthood, right? I help out sometimes, and what I usually do is this kind of stuff. You know, basic things you don't need a medical license for."
"Oh. That makes sense." Sara paused, biting her lip and furrowing her brow. "Wait. So, like, why didn't you bring this up before? Getting tested, I mean. Like, we could have, you know...done things by now."
"Honestly? I kind of figured that we wouldn't have had sex yet. You haven't been ready, and I respect that. But I would have brought it up if I thought we were going to," Tegan shrugged. The wording she used did not escape Sara. It seemed Tegan did not consider what they had done the previous week to be sex, which relieved Sara somewhat.
"But what about, like...'in the heat of the moment'?" Sara hoped she could find out something about protection without having to ask directly.
"I, uh, carry stuff in my bag, just in case." Tegan nodded, but realized that might have come off differently than she intended. "Not that I expect anything to happen! I usually just give it out to friends, but like, I made sure to be stocked in case you were ready."
"What kind of stuff? Like condoms?" Sara was more confused now than she was before. Everything Tegan said seemed like she was talking about the condoms they had to put on bananas in her sex ed class. Tegan grabbed her backpack and brought it back to the couch with her.
"Male condoms." Tegan started naming off things as she pulled them out and handed them to Sara. "Female condoms. Dental dams. Latex gloves. Finger cots. Water-based lube." Sara looked at all the packets in her lap with wide eyes. There were only a few of each thing, and the lube was in single-use packets, but she was a little overwhelmed with it all.
"Holy shit." Sara picked up the gloves and cots with hesitation. "What are these for?"
"Hands that may be...inserted...places." Tegan wasn't sure how much detail she wanted. Sara just nodded and put them back down, trading for the female condoms and dental dams.
"I didn't know that there were female condoms. And what the hell is a dental dam?" Sara was a little afraid of the word 'dental' being in the name.
"Yeah, those go inside you. And dams are just a sheet of latex for, uh, oral use. Do you want to see one?" Tegan asked.
"No," Sara shook her head. "I don't want to waste them, and I don't...I'm not..." Sara trailed off, staring at Tegan with uncertainty.
"Oh!" Tegan understood what Sara was implying. "No no no. I don't mean a full demonstration," she chuckled. "I've done demonstrations a bunch of times, and believe me, no clothes were removed." Tegan took a pamphlet out of her bag and one of each item from Sara's lap. "Here, I'll just leave this on your dresser. This is instructions for all of them. You can look at them whenever you feel comfortable. I get them from my mom for free, so don't worry about wasting them. Knowing how to use protection effectively is not a waste." She placed everything she was leaving for Sara on the dresser by the bathroom door and packed the rest back in her bag.
"Thank you." Sara breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn't expected Tegan to be quite so prepared, and it was all a bit much to take in with Tegan still there.
"Besides, now that we know neither of us has anything, and we can't exactly knock each other up, so uh, none of this is technically necessary whenever we do decide to have sex. Unless you want to use something. That's okay, too. Condoms and comfortable is always a better idea than no condoms and not comfortable." Tegan didn't want Sara to think that they couldn't use any protection just because they had shared test results. After all, Sara was the one who had asked about it. As soon as Tegan sat back down, Sara engulfed her in a hug.
"How do you continue to be so amazing?" Sara was convinced that a better girlfriend didn't exist.