Don't Ever Forget 10 ~ Just When Everything Seems To Be Looking Up…

EPOV

I tried forcing myself to sleep after returning home from Bella's, but my mind continued to race all night. Any excitement I should have been feeling after just becoming engaged to the girl I loved fell to the background when I heard my parents speaking in rough, hushed voices in the kitchen as soon as I walked in the door.

"Esme, will you please just calm down and come to bed? It's getting late," my father said in an exasperated tone.

"No, I'm going to wait up for Edward to come home," my mother replied, her voice sounding equally as tense.

"He's a grown man, dear. He doesn't need his mother burning the midnight oil waiting for him," he sighed and I quietly closed the door behind me. I knew I shouldn't have been eavesdropping on my parents' conversation, but I hadn't heard them speak to each other in such a way since my enlistment. And even that was mild compared to what I was hearing at that moment, and I couldn't comprehend why they would be.

"I don't care how old he is, Carlisle. He is still my son and I will do whatever I damn well please when it comes to him," she hissed with such venom, it caused my blood to feel like ice coursing through my veins.

"Esme, why are you behaving this way? You knew he was bound to grow up someday."

"Why don't you get it? The only consolation to that has been ripped away from under my feet!" my mother exclaimed, now with evident tears in her voice. "This was supposed to be our time. The boys are grown, the Army is behind us, I was supposed to get my husband back. We were supposed to grow old together, play with our grandchildren, everything we've been waiting for. And now, we won't even get that!"

"Esme, this isn't a death sentence," my father said softly and I stood frozen in fear in the hallway. "They caught it early and the prognosis is good."

"It's cancer, Carlisle. I don't need to be a doctor to know that there are no guarantees with that!" my mother yelled and I fell back with a thump against the wall, bile rising in my throat.

I didn't need for them to clarify—the last few days made it all too clear. His demeanor, the tired, drawn appearance, the heightened tension in my mother. My strong, resilient father, my hero, had cancer.

"Son?" his voice sounded from a few feet away from me and I slowly lifted my eyes to look at him, shaking my head. "Edward, let's talk about this."

"No. Just … no," I replied, backing away and heading for the stairs with tears burning in my eyes. "I can't…"

I ran as fast as my legs would carry me to my room, slamming the door behind me and collapsing on my bed, where I still laid hours later. Anger and disbelief coursed through me in equal measure, causing silent cries to escape my chest. Why is this happening? I kept asking myself over and over, pounding my fists into the mattress beneath me. My father couldn't have cancer—he just couldn't. As much as I loved my mother, my dad was my pillar of strength, my backbone. All I'd ever wanted to be was him, and to have him there to watch with pride as each rank and achievement came to fruition. To be present the day I got married and eventually welcomed my first child into the world.

Not this. Never this.

After a sleepless night, I finally rose and made my way downstairs. The smell of brewing coffee assaulted my senses and before I could move to return to my room, I heard my father's voice calling from the kitchen.

"Edward, please come here."

I sighed heavily and swallowed hard, my entire body rigid as I made the hesitant steps down the hall until I reached the doorway My father was seated on one of the stools at the island and reached over to pull out the one beside him, gesturing for me to join him. I stood still, folding my arms over my chest—I wasn't sure I was ready for what was to come, but it appeared I had no choice. "Does Emmett know?"

My father leaned forward on his elbows on the counter and slowly nodded. "Yes, your brother knows."

"But you hid it from me," I said tensely, my gaze locked on him as his shoulders fell slightly. "What, I'm not grown enough for that?"

"Son, please come sit down," my father pleaded in a tired voice and I crossed the kitchen to the coffee pot. It had been a while since I indulged in the bitter liquid, but with no sleep under my belt, I knew I'd need it. Without bothering with milk or sugar, I took the cup and settled onto the stool across from him instead, waiting for him to speak. "Listen, I know you're upset—"

"Upset? Why would I be upset? I only just found out that my father is dying and didn't feel that I had the need to know. Or maybe that I'm man enough to serve my country, but not enough to handle this," I growled, my anger returning in full force. "I knew it. I knew something was wrong, but you told me not to worry about it."

"Edward, first of all, I'm not dying. It's very early on, and people come back from far worse," my father replied calmly, meeting my gaze with his ever-gentle blue eyes. "I didn't want you worrying over nothing for your holidays."

"This isn't nothing, Dad. Mom was right. This is cancer, there are no guarantees. People also die from far less, as well," I answered through clenched teeth, my hand gripping my mug in a vice-like hold.

"Only when they give up, and I am far from that. I'm going to fight this, and that's more than half the battle right there," he replied, resting his hand on my arm.

I shrugged off his hand, realizing what he was trying to do. "I'm not one of your patients. I don't need that false hope crap," I said after a moment, my voice lowering minimally as my eyes fell to the counter. "You still should have told me."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I was just waiting for a better time," he replied and held up his hand as I looked back up to him with a clenched jaw. "I was going to tell you long before you left. I just didn't want to ruin your Christmas or your proposal to your girlfriend.

"Well, Christmas has been ruined anyway, and now, I can't even focus on the fact that my girlfriend said yes," I said in an anguished voice, releasing my cup to bring my hands to either side of my head, folding my fingers behind my neck.

"That is still wonderful news, son," he replied, and with my eyes closed, I transported my mind to how that moment should have been. My father, strong and healthy, embracing me at the announcement. Maybe even making a half-hearted remark about how young we were, but supportive all the same. But I couldn't hide forever in the childish imaginings and I opened my eyes again to look at him. "I'm going to be fine. I'm having surgery a few days after you head back to Maryland, and I expect to have a near clean bill of health by summer when you return again."

"That's a little too optimistic there, Dad," I said in a slightly sarcastic tone, my forehead creasing with my words. "Where is it?"

"Prostate," he replied simply and I leaned harshly against the low back of the stool.

"Fuck, Dad," I exhaled heavily, my eyes rolling back as they began to burn again.

"Edward, you may be an adult, but watch your language," he admonished me.

"Sorry, sir," I replied obediently, scrubbing my hands over my face. "It's just … prostate?"

"The tumor is small and local. As far as we can tell, it hasn't spread anywhere. It was sheer chance that they found it at all. I went to the doctor for my kidney stones acting up again," he explained slowly, tenting his fingers in front of him on the counter. "The survival rate is very high in cases like mine. Don't worry yourself until there's something to worry about, and that's not now. I have no intention of going anywhere and leaving my wife and boys."

I nodded non-committally, my voice lodged in my throat. I wished I could feel the confidence echoed in his words, but I couldn't shake the instant stigma attached to the term "cancer". Pain and suffering. My father gaunt and pale, losing all his hair to the treatments. Death, mourning, the utter devastation to my entire family. My chest was tight and my hands shook under the strain of my thoughts, and from pure exhaustion.

"Edward, I've never lied to you, or shielded you from anything, even as a boy. And I've never made a promise to you that I didn't feel with absolute certainty that I would be able to keep. You know that. I've got a lot more fight left in me than this is going to take. And I will be here when you marry that beautiful girl of yours and long after," my father said in a reassuring tone, and I wanted so badly to believe him wholeheartedly, every word. But instead, I rested my forehead on my arms, folded on the table. "You should go get some rest, son. You're exhausted."

"No, I'm fine. I'm just going to take a shower and head over to see Bella," I replied, shaking my head as it rose and taking a sip of the lukewarm coffee in front of me. I needed her far more than sleep.

"All right. Just be careful, and please, bring her by later. I'd like to hug and congratulate my future daughter-in-law," my father said with a genuine smile, standing up and resting his hand on my shoulder. "I'm very happy for you both."

I rose and wrapped my arms around him, uncaring of the fact that I felt about ten years old again with the motion. "I love you, Dad."

I felt his embrace secure around me gently and he patted my back. "I love you, too, Edward. Always have and will."

x-x-x

"Wait, what did you say?" Bella gasped as she shakily lowered to the couch beside me after I told her the news, tears immediately welling in her eyes. "But that's impossible. Your dad is so healthy. He doesn't look sick at all."

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my palms until I gave in and lowered my head to her lap, finally succumbing to the sob I'd been restraining all night. "He says it's early and insists he'll be fine. But God, Bella, what if he's not? I can't lose my dad."

I heard her breathe out slowly and hugged my arm around her legs as she gently stroked my hair with her fingertips. With anyone else, I would have felt like a complete idiot, crying as I was into the fabric of her jeans and allowing myself to be completely vulnerable. There was also the twinge of guilt running through me for ruining what should have been one of the happiest days of our lives. It was Christmas, we were together, and we'd been engaged for less than twenty-four hours. And instead, I was sobbing into her lap like a child, desperate for the comfort only she could give me.

"I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry," I cried, pressing my lips to her denim-clad thigh. "I just couldn't break down in front of him. I couldn't do that."

"It's okay, Edward. I understand," Bella replied softly, her hand moving to my back and rubbing slow circles against it. "And call me an optimist, but maybe things really will be okay. He's a doctor, so he would know his odds better than the average person. He's a strong man and you said they caught it early, right? And he's got excellent medical care at his disposal."

I sighed and rose from her lap, leaning back against the couch. "But what if he's not? And he dies and I'm thousands of miles away. Hell, just the surgery alone runs just as many risks as any other."

"Baby, listen to me," Bella said firmly and I looked at her as she moved to settle onto my lap. "I love your dad, nearly as much as I love mine. And I can't even begin to imagine how I would feel if this happened to my own father, though I'm pretty sure I'd be just as scared as you are. I am scared right now. But Carlisle Cullen is the last man in the world I could ever see giving up at even a worse obstacle than this. And you shouldn't, either. Fearing the worst isn't going to help at all, Edward."

I slid my arms around her waist and pressed my face to her chest, listening to the low thrum of her pounding heart, and allowing it to calm me a little. I held her tight as what felt like a million thoughts ran through my mind simultaneously. I knew she was right; I couldn't give up. But with my father's diagnosis came a slew of fresh realizations.

While I hadn't understood my mother's behavior before, I did at that moment with startling clarity. For more than twenty-five years, she had been everything an Army wife should be. Patient and understanding, married with two children, and never complaining when, at times, she was raising us on her own while our father was deployed or on other Army business. She had been waiting and praying for all those years to have her husband home and safe, and finally begin her life with him. And suddenly, she was struck with the reality that it might not ever happen. I could understand how it would be difficult to be optimistic when it seemed as if the world was crashing down around her. Both her children had grown and begun their own lives, and the possibility of her husband dying and leaving her completely along was more real than any battlefield he'd ever faced.

There was never a doubt in my mind how much my father loved my mother, and vice versa. But suddenly, my future with Bella reflected in my parents flashed before me, and I didn't like what I saw. Even if I didn't have plans to become a career officer like my father anymore, there were never any guarantees in in this world, and I vowed that I wouldn't make my parents' mistake. I'd never take Bella for granted or make her feel that she was anything less than a priority in my life. If we ever had kids, she wouldn't be a married, single parent. And if I died tomorrow, she would know exactly how much I loved her and how important she was to me. I would tell her and show her in any way I could, every single day for the rest of my life.

"Thank you, Bella," I murmured, gripping the back of her shirt tightly in my fingers. "You really are the best thing to ever walk into my crazy life. You know that, right?"

Bella's lips pressed to the top of my head and I could almost feel her body flush in response to my words as her embrace tightened around me. "I love you, Edward."

"Love you, too," I barely managed to mumble before my body went lax in her arms and I finally fell asleep there against her.

x-x-x

I wasn't sure how long I'd been out when I woke on the couch, lying flat with a blanket over me, and Bella nowhere in sight. I rose to sit, my body still trembling with exhaustion, but I didn't want to sleep anymore and waste another second I had with her.

"Bella?" I called out, standing slowly from the couch.

"In the kitchen," she replied, her voice carrying down the hall and I followed the sound.

However, I stopped abruptly in the doorway when I spotted Alice sitting at the table, carseat at her feet and her arms folded over her chest. I fought a smile at the severe look on her face and quickly made my way over to Bella, kissing her cheek and then crouching down in front of my goddaughter. "Good morning, sweet girl."

"Afternoon is more like it," Alice chimed in with her foot bouncing impatiently as I lifted Sarahlynn into my arms. "And don't think you're hiding behind my daughter. How could you not tell me you were planning to propose to my best friend last night?"

"I told Jasper," I replied and a laugh finally escaped me as she gasped with her mouth wide open. "And we both knew that you couldn't keep a secret."

"Oh, that is so not true!" Alice exclaimed, and after the heaviness of the morning and the night before, it felt good to be able to have a light-hearted banter with her. "I'm an excellent secret keeper!"

Both Bella and I looked at her with eyebrows raised sarcastically, and Alice pouted with a huff. I stood with the baby in my arms and took the seat on the other side of Bella, focusing on the tiny fingers that stretched out and then curled back into a fist as I lightly traced the back of her hand. Sarahlynn gazed up at me, gurgling while the girls resumed the conversation they'd obviously been having before I interrupted.

"Honestly, Bella. How is a wedding supposed to come together in the matter of eight months?" Alice asked with the hint of a whine in her voice.

"Very easily. People do it all the time We could even elope if I thought my father would give his consent, since I'm only seventeen," Bella replied, and I was unable to discern if she was serious or not by her expression. Until she broke into a laugh at her father's "Not a chance, Isabella. Graduation first," echoing from down the hall as he came down the stairs to sit in the living room.

"And Edward wouldn't dare do something like that. If Charlie didn't kill him, his brother and best friend would," Alice added, her gaze moving to me with narrowed eyes.

"No, Ma'am," I answered with a smirk.

"But Bella, seriously," Alice began, turning her attention back to my fiancée. Fiancée. God, I loved the sound of that. "You're still going to be seventeen in August anyway, so why the rush? A few more months would give us so many more options to work with."

Bella stiffened slightly, reaching for her glass of water in front of her and taking a sip. "That's not really a luxury we have, Alice. Edward is in the Army, and we both want to be married before he gets his assignment, and that could be anywhere. Which leaves us with August, when he comes back from AIT. Besides, I'm not one of those girls who's been planning and envisioning her perfect wedding since I was a kid. I never did the pillowcase veil or pretend weddings in my bedroom. I didn't even think I'd ever want to get married before Edward and I got together, quite honestly. So the how and when don't matter to me at all. I just want to be with him."

Alice was surprisingly silent following Bella's rant and I glanced over to the love of my life to find her roughly brushing away a tear that had fallen down her cheek. "I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean…"

"I know," Bella whispered back to Alice with her eyes lowered to her lap. "I just really don't want anything extravagant. Things like that aren't important to me. It's just a bunch of unnecessary things, all for the same desired result. To marry Edward. I'd be happier walking down the aisle in jeans and sneakers than all that. As long as our family and friends are there, that's all that really matters."

"Well, aside from the jeans and sneakers thing, which will never happen," Alice replied with a small smile. "I think that sounds amazing and completely you. And August will still be warm enough to even have it outside."

"In Washington, Alice?" I piped in finally. "We have more likelihood of being rained out than a chance at a dry day."

A smile, however small, returned to Bella's lips and her hand came to rest on my leg. "But we still have plenty of time to figure all this out. We just got engaged last night, Alice."

"So? We already had Rose's wedding half-planned by this point when she got engaged to Emmett," Alice quipped with an arched eyebrow.

"We really just want to enjoy our time together right now, before I have to go back," I replied and felt Bella's fingers gently squeeze my knee. "And we're going to my parents' house for dinner tonight."

Bella's head shot up and turned toward me quickly, her eyes wide with surprise. "We are? But I thought…"

"Change in plans. My father wants to see his 'future daughter-in-law'," I said as she trailed off, kissing her temple and attempting to block out the heaviness weighing in around us again, and to quell her confusion. My house was the last place I'd wanted to be that night when we'd last spoken of it the previous evening, and I hadn't had the chance that morning to inform her otherwise.

"And your mom?" Bella asked with questioning eyes, seemingly forgetting that we weren't alone in the room for a moment.

"It will be fine, I promise," I replied reassuringly.

"Wait, what's up with your mom? I thought she loved Bella," Alice inquired, reminding us of her presence.

I looked to Bella, who shook her head subtly, telling me without words that she hadn't divulged any information to Alice concerning my father. And in that particular moment, I was eternally grateful for it. I turned my attention back to Alice and offered a forced smile. "She was just a little taken by surprise with the engagement. Thinks we're a bit young for that."

Alice looked between us with a disbelieving expression, but thankfully, let it go. "Okay, well, I was just stopping by to wish Charlie and Bella a Merry Christmas, and really should be heading over to Grandma and Grandpa Whitlock's with their grandbaby. First Christmas and all, they're kinda making a big deal of it."

I nodded and leaned down to kiss Sarahlynn's forehead before she was lifted from my arms by her mother, asking Alice to give the Whitlock's my regards and a promise to visit them before I left.

With a farewell to Chief swan, Alice was out the door and Bella immediately turned to me. "Your parents' house? Really?"

I stepped toward her and wrapped my arms around her shoulders, kissing her hair. "It will be fine, baby. And if it's not, we'll leave."

"Okay, but I'm driving," she replied and my forehead creased. "You're still exhausted, if the snores rumbling my entire house a little while ago are any indication."

"I don't snore," I called out to her as she pulled away from me and headed for the stairs.

"You do, too!" she practically sang as she disappeared up to her room.

"Like a train," Chief Swan added softly from his recliner with a chuckle and I turned to look at him, meeting his sympathetic gaze.

Well, he knows, I thought to myself with a heavy sigh.

x-x-x

Bella's hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as we pulled to a stop in front of the house, her lips pressed into a thin line and moisture brimming her eyes. I reached over to trace along her arm lightly and then loosened her hold, gliding my fingers between hers and bringing them to my lips to brush a kiss against my knuckles.

"Baby, we don't have to go in there if you're not ready to," I said softly and she turned her gaze to me.

"No, I'm fine," she replied with a small smile and I raised my eyebrow at her. "Really, Edward, I'm okay. Are you?"

I sat silently for a moment, thoroughly pondering that. However, it didn't take long for me to have my answer, and then slowly nodded my head, squeezing her hand gently. "Yeah, I am."

"All right, then let's go," she said, nodding her head toward the car door.

"Okay," I whispered, leaning over to give her a gentle kiss and releasing her hand to step out of the car.

Bella met me at the front and slid her arm around my waist as we made our way to the door, immediately walking into the house to find my parents standing there, waiting for us. She released me once again and walked toward them, wrapping my father tightly in her embrace.

"Congratulations, Bella," he murmured against her hair as he rested his cheek against the top of her head.

"Yes, congratulations. We are so thrilled to have you become part of the family," my mother added from beside them, pressed close to my father's side and her gaze met mine, mouthing "I'm sorry".

Bella opened her eyes to look at her and brought one of her arms to wrap around my mother as well. "Thank you. Both of you."

As I stood watching my fiancée being engulfed in my parents' arms, I found myself relaxing somewhat, despite all that had transpired in the last few days. For the first time in weeks, it really seemed as if things might actually be okay. Even though I would be a few thousand miles away very shortly, I knew that everyone I cared about would be together, and no matter what the outcome of my father's illness, both my parents would have an added support system in Bella.

The next chapter is complete and in the process of being pre-read and edited, so hopefully it won't be much of a wait for the next part. Thank you so much for reading