I normally never work from an outline, but I finished a rough one for the remainder of Vanquished yesterday, just because I have so much going on that I was afraid I would leave out something important. I have a feeling I may be forced to write a sequel when it's finished to address some loose ends I'm likely to leave hanging open at the end. Emmett's story, however, will be wrapped up when it's all said and done, in about another 20 or 30 chapters. =)
I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.
Chapter Ten - Worries
If I had been in the car with anyone else, we would likely have ridden in silence the rest of the way to Port Angeles. Edward's habit of responding to my unspoken thoughts when we were alone prevented me from lapsing into silence altogether. Besides, I wasn't going to let whatever was going on weigh on me too much. It wasn't as if Rosalie could be planning anything that would get to me too badly. Sure, I'd lost it with Aro one time. I'd been back to my normal self ever since. Aro was grating on everyone's nerves, and I hadn't even come close to blowing up at him since that first time.
"So what exactly is on Aro's list?" I asked. I wanted to talk about something, anything, other than speculating about what Rosalie might be planning that was so bad she had Bella blocking her thoughts from Edward for her.
Edward chuckled to himself. "I don't know how many stops we might need to make," he informed me. "Aro has been watching quite a bit of late-night television, and apparently he's quite susceptible to advertising techniques, not having built up any kind of immunity to them over the years like most adults."
Edward proceeded to rattle off a list including dozens of different types of food products, plus a number of as-seen-on-TV items. In addition, Alice wanted us to buy some clothes for him. After only a week of sitting in front of the television, eating junk food, and drinking beer, Jasper's clothes were already starting to get a little snug on Aro.
"What exactly does Aro want with a Sham-Wow anyway?" I wondered aloud. "It's not as if he actually cleans up after himself. Guy can't even be bothered to take a shower."
"He is aware that he should shower," Edward told me as lightly as he could manage. "He's just afraid of angering you again."
Great. Just like Alice and Jasper had said. I'd scared Aro away from showering. The fact that he reeked was my fault. I didn't have the foggiest idea how I was going to make this right.
"Carlisle is planning to speak to him today actually," Edward informed me. "He assumed the reason I'd asked you along on this trip was to make his conversation with Aro a bit easier."
Suddenly, I remembered that Esme had asked Edward something when he first asked me to come along shopping. "Esme had some other idea about what was going on, didn't she?" I asked suspiciously.
Edward snickered. "She wanted to know if I was quite sure I could handle you at the store."
"Oh." In spite of everything, I couldn't keep myself from grinning. "I'll be on my best behavior," I said solemnly.
We stopped first at the supermarket. Edward chose a different place than the one I'd visited before with Esme, to my relief. I really didn't want to go any place where people might remember my bizarre behavior from the last trip. I managed to restrain myself from being too overwhelmed. I passively took in the sights, sounds, and smells while Edward buzzed about the store filling a shopping cart with Aro's personal selections. He spent a comparatively long time in the aisles with cereal and snacks. Before long, the cart was full and Edward went to get a second cart.
"This can't all be for Aro," I commented when Edward returned.
"Much of it is," he allowed, "but Esme asked me to pick up some things for Renesmee and Jacob as well."
"I guess it's a good thing our tournament got called off," I muttered bitterly while following Edward around pushing the full shopping cart as he proceeded to fill up a second one. I couldn't even imagine how many shopping carts we would have had to fill if we'd needed to buy things for all the wolves.
"I know it was disappointing for you," he said sympathetically. "There was really no other option though. Aro's presence changes much."
"I know," I sighed. "Plus, it probably would have been too overstimulating for him to be around everyone at once. Still, I was looking forward to kicking those wolves' butts."
Edward turned to face me, grinning. "Perhaps we'll have a chance some other time. You weren't the only one who wanted to find a way to beat them without causing any actual harm."
Surprisingly, it actually made me feel better that I wasn't the only one upset over the cancellation of our tournament. It had been just a small thing, I knew, but I had really been looking forward to it. Our lives were perfect, by most peoples' standards. After all, we would never grow old, never get tired, never become sick, and didn't even need to sleep, so we had plenty of time to pursue our favorite activities. What most people didn't realize was that life could get boring when you did the same exact thing day after day, night after night, without the monotony even being broken up by work or school. As much as we loathed going through high school over and over, it was at least a change of pace to study different things every day, even if they were things we'd already studied dozens of times, and to have people to be around, even if we didn't speak to them much. Living in Forks for so long meant that we had to go into hiding, and being in hiding meant that we were all starting to get just a little stir-crazy. The wolves were the only ones we could be ourselves around, and that was enough to make us not mind their presence so much, even if they stunk.
Without anything constructive to add to the shopping trip, I busied myself by peering at Edward's selections in the full shopping cart while he continued to fill the second cart. Try as I might, I couldn't find a single thing that would remotely pass for healthy food. Considering that Aro was already beginning to put on weight, I wondered what was going to happen when he had an even bigger variety of junk to pick from.
"It's kind of disgusting how this stuff is all that gets advertised, isn't it?" I remarked.
Edward was trying to select meat for Jacob and Nessie and seemed to be having a hard time of it. I could understand that. It smelled absolutely horrid—like death that was beginning to rot. "Yes," he replied to my statement, "but it's also somewhat understandable. The companies who make those products have the most money to spend on advertising."
"True. Still kind of a shame. I mean, I understand that the effect it has on Aro is exaggerated, but it probably has some effect on everyone else too."
"I'm sure it does. Everyone else doesn't live with us though." Edward seemed pretty distracted, so I just let the subject drop. I had matters more pressing on my mind anyway than whether or not Aro gained some more weight while he stayed with us.
Rosalie. What was she planning? What could I possibly do to try to give her what she wanted? I knew she wanted to be human more than anything else in the world, but I honestly didn't think there was any possible way I could give her that. Picturing eternity without my Rose in it—it was like picturing misery itself wrapped in pain. It would make her happy though. Could I really begrudge her that, if she figured out a way to make it happen? I was torn.
Stop worrying about it, I reminded myself. Worrying wouldn't solve anything. Whatever was going to happen, it was beyond my control. Rose was going to do what she was going to do, and no one could stop her. Once she set her mind to something, she would achieve it. She was nothing if not strong. All I could do was wait, and worrying wouldn't make the wait any easier.
Edward was listening quietly to my thoughts, of course. He stopped suddenly in front of me, and only my own enhanced reflexes prevented me from plowing the full shopping cart I was pushing into his back. Not that it would have hurt him anyway. "Are you quite certain that Rosalie would be happier as a human than she would be with you?" He spoke in tones that a human would never be able to hear, even standing beside us.
Of course I can't be certain, but it's what she's always wanted. She's made no secret of the fact that she would sooner be human than be with me. I never paid it much mind before, because I never thought it was possible.
"I simply do not want you to repeat my mistakes."
There was a difference. You left because you thought she'd be happier having a normal human life, but Bella didn't want you to leave. If this is really what Rose wants, what kind of man am I if I refuse to give it to her?
"It isn't your fault if you're incapable of giving it to her. If she wanted the moon itself, you wouldn't blame yourself for being unable to capture it and place it into her hands."
That was true enough. I really needed to stop worrying about this. In all my years, I had never once spent much time worrying about anything. I hated that my own happy attitude had changed seemingly overnight.
"Perhaps you've never encountered anything worth worrying about before," Edward remarked.
Argh, I couldn't handle this. I needed normalcy. I needed to take my mind off of Rose and whatever she was plotting or thinking. My mind wasn't built for wallowing in angst and self-doubt. It was built for helping others get through their problems and for kicking back, relaxing, and enjoying life. I needed something to enjoy.
"Now that, I believe I can help you with," Edward smiled at me as he pulled out his cell phone. I could hear Leah on the other end of the line. "Hello Leah, it's Edward. May I speak with your brother please?"
Leah growled something incoherent before answering "Fine, he's a big boy, he can talk to whomever he wants." A few moments later, I heard Seth's voice come through Edward's phone.
"Seth, Emmett is in need of some cheering. I wondered if you might have some free time this afternoon?"
"Of course!" The joy in Seth's voice was contagious. I couldn't keep myself from feeling better even if I'd tried to stay down.
"I hoped you'd say that. We'll see you at our house in a few hours, then?" With that, the plans were complete. I couldn't pretend not to be pleased about the prospect of spending some time around Seth. He was so upbeat and cheerful, it was impossible to be sad and downtrodden around him. He was even better than Jasper at spreading joy. With Seth, you knew that the joy was genuine and had originated from inside you.
I felt much more lighthearted through the rest of our errands. Buying the groceries had gotten us some strange looks, and Edward had been forced to use the same "throwing a party" line that Esme had used last week. After the grocery store, we had stopped at a drugstore that had a large "As seen on TV" section to purchase some more items on Aro's wish list. I couldn't understand what in the world Aro could have wanted with a purse organizer or underwear to make womens' rear ends look better, but Edward just shrugged and picked up the items without questioning. We spent several minutes trying to decide which color Snuggie was appropriate for Aro, finally deciding on the forest green shade because it was least likely to remind him of the robes worn by the Volturi.
"We'll need to be relatively expedient at picking out clothing," Edward commented. "I should have considered the fact that we were buying perishable food items and stopped at the supermarket last."
"Let's just pick him up a few things for now then, and let Alice go on a proper shopping trip for him later in the week," I suggested. She probably wasn't going to like whatever we picked out anyway. Edward nodded his agreement, and we picked out three sets of clothing for Aro from a local department store before heading back to Forks.
Every time I started to feel sorry for myself on the ride home, I remembered that Seth was coming by this afternoon and felt better. I hoped that whatever Rose had planned, she would get it over with pretty soon. I didn't know how much longer I could handle this, and I didn't want to have to keep hauling Seth out every time I started to feel anxious about the future.
We arrived at home in record time, since Edward could tell that there were no police on the way back and felt free to exercise his lead foot to the fullest. Within a minute or so, we'd unloaded all of our purchases, and Esme and Bella set about finding places to store all the food. I decided that maybe Aro would feel more disposed to my presence if I made him a peace offering, and Edward seemed to agree with me, so I approached him with our purchases from the drug store.
"Hi Aro," I said, summoning all the cheer I could for my tone of voice. Much to my relief, it was apparent that he had showered during our absence. Carlisle's talk must have been a success. He flinched noticeably at my approach, cowering slightly against the corner of the couch. I set all the bags down beside him. "We picked up all the things you asked for."
"Oh!" Aro's posture relaxed considerably as he began to peer into the bags cautiously. I got the distinct impression that he thought a snake or something was going to fly out and assault him. I helped him open all the packages, watching his face light up like Nessie's used to do when she was a little girl. I still didn't have the foggiest idea what he planned to do with most of these items, but he was nevertheless pleased to have them. When he got to the Snuggie, he was absolutely delighted.
"Such an exquisite color!" he exclaimed. I could tell just by looking at the thing that it was made of inferior fabric, but I wasn't about to tell Aro that. He pulled it on immediately, and I had to conceal my smirk.
"Maybe we should wash that first? Keep it from making you itchy?" I offered.
"Oh, I suppose that's a good idea," he replied, disappointment evident in his tone.
"Not to worry, you'll have it back in a couple hours. There are some new clothes for you in here somewhere too," I told him, digging through the bags and retrieving the clothing we'd bought for him.
"Oh, very good!" He snatched up the clothes and scrambled up the stairs to change. While he was gone, I tossed his new blanket into the washing machine. Several minutes later, he descended the stairs again, and it was painfully obvious that he was wearing the underwear designed to improve the appearance of womens' rear ends. I managed to contain myself, just barely.
"Lookin' good, Aro," I lied. His rear end was sticking out like one of the girls in a music video, and I couldn't imagine those underwear were particularly comfortable for a man to wear. He was walking a little strangely.
"Thank you," he replied sincerely, seating himself once more on the couch. I guessed he hadn't thought about the fact that no one was going to see his backside when he was sitting on it all the time anyway.
"Seth will be over in a few hours," Edward informed Esme and Bella as he helped them rearrange the cabinets in the kitchen to accommodate Aro's selections.
"Oh, should we prepare something for him?" Esme asked.
"I'm not sure," Edward admitted. "I think he and Emmett will be going out."
"Well, we can always make something quickly if he's hungry," Bella said reasonably.
Rosalie, who had been milling around the room dusting, suddenly stopped and exchanged a look with Bella. She arched a perfectly-manicured eyebrow at Bella, who dipped her head down once. Then, Rose seemed to remember something important she needed to do. I watched uncomfortably as she zipped upstairs, returning seconds later wearing her overalls, then darted out to the garage. Well, maybe she just needed to go out there to de-stress. Working on cars was like a drug to her. Still, I hadn't missed the exchange with my sister. One didn't need to read minds to understand the point of that mini-conversation.
Am I still shielded?
Yes, of course.
Try as I might, I couldn't stop myself from wondering why she would need to know before going to the garage that Bella was still protecting her thoughts from Edward.