A/N: Woah dude, it's been nearly two years since I updated this? TBH I wasn't ever going to touch it again because mpreg still doesn't sit right with me, but I had a sudden spurt of inspiration and wrote up a timeline for the rest of this fic (I had no internet for over a month and got desperate) so there's a chance we may actually reach an ending (if anyone is even still interested in this story?). Give me love so I continue to be inspired please. XD

Gestation: conception.

o0o

"So, how'd it go?"

The smile on Tsunade's face was giving Kakashi the creeps, and he vowed that she would never ever find out about his embarrassing performance the night before.

"Mah, what did you expect? We fucked like bunnies all night long." He waggled an eyebrow suggestively.

Actually, he'd lain awake for a fair amount of time after Iruka's breathing had evened out into sleep, running his eyes over the chūnin's glistening naked body and wondering at how it had changed, and how it would change in future. It had surprised him when Iruka had rolled over, burying his face in his chest, his breasts pressed tight against his side, but it hadn't been unpleasant. On the contrary, he'd quite enjoyed the contact.

Iruka's foot came down hard on his toes and he barely managed to refrain from yelping. "Please, Tsunade-sama," the chūnin said, his voice perfectly calm and composed, "I'd just like to take the tests and get out of here, if that's possible. I have a lot of things to do."

Tsunade grinned at him. "Of course, Iruka-sensei. And might I add, you're quite cute like this. Are you sure you don't want to stay a feisty kunoichi?"

Kakashi was quite happy to second that motion. Iruka's hair was pulled back in his usual ponytail, but it was longer and softer than it normally was. He'd flat out refused to wear anything remotely feminine, instead obstinately donning a pair of baggy uniform pants and a large t-shirt, which he was currently drowning in. The gentle curve of his breasts and stomach were hinted at underneath the thin material, though, and Kakashi thought he looked more arousing than he had even last night.

"Tsunade-sama," Iruka growled.

"Yes, yes." Tsunade smiled sweetly. "Shizune will take you through for examination. Generally we wouldn't be able to tell this early, but because your body is, ah, unique, we should be able to get an idea of whether you've conceived or not." At Iruka's frown she added quickly, "Though it is highly unlikely that you didn't conceive. This is merely a routine check."

Kakashi's eyes followed him out of the room. Man, he has a delicious ass.

"Brat."

He snapped his attention back to his leader.

"I don't think I need to tell you this, but I'm warning you anyway. Be very, very careful with him. This is going to be difficult for both of you, but his life is about to become physically and emotionally stressful in a way that you can't even begin to contemplate. Remember that he is doing this for you."

It irked him that she was treating him like a child, but Kakashi realized that he was not particularly known for his empathetic qualities, and Tsunade perhaps knew him better than most. If she thought he was going to have trouble dealing with Iruka – well, he was already having difficulty simply dealing with the fact that he was living with another person. But it couldn't get that much worse, could it?

o0o

Iruka snuck his hands up under his shirt to touch his stomach for what was probably the millionth time. There is a baby growing inside me. It didn't quite seem real. He didn't feel any different, except for the fact that he was still outwardly female, and Kakashi kept staring at him in a way that was slightly unnerving. Shizune had told him that right now the life form inside him was just a couple of cells, but it would grow rapidly over the next few weeks. He couldn't imagine what he'd look like at the end of all this, and he didn't really want to.

"Are you having fun feeling yourself up over there?"

Iruka stuck his tongue out childishly at the jōnin and turned away, but at the same time removed his hands from his shirt. It was the first thing Kakashi had said to him directly since – well, since the night before, when they'd been tangled in each other's arms. He didn't know how he felt about that.

"Because I could help with that, if you like."

Iruka almost jumped. The voice was suddenly right beside his ear, and Kakashi's hands were sneaking around his waist. "Pervert." Iruka halfheartedly swatted at the questing fingers. "What do you want?"

He realized it had probably come out harsher than he'd intended when Kakashi quickly withdrew his hands, but couldn't quite bring himself to take the words back.

There was a pause, and then Kakashi asked awkwardly, "Would you like a drink?"

Iruka bit the inside of his cheek. He really shouldn't have said it like that, Kakashi was skittish enough as it is. "Water, please," he said quietly.

He sank down on the couch as Kakashi clattered about in the kitchen, staring blankly at the coffee table. I'm going to be a father. Mother. Whatever. I will have a child of my own. He couldn't wrap his head around it, and he had a vague feeling that he wouldn't actually get used to the idea until he had the baby in his arms.

A loud growling startled him out of his reprieve, and he squinted at the sudden appearance of Kakashi's ninken. All eight of them, all with hackles raised. "What's wrong?"

Guruko was in his face, teeth barred and lips pulled back into a snarl. "Who are you?" he growled.

"Umino Iruka?"

"Lies," Bisuke yipped. "If you lie again we'll rip your throat out."

"Who will rip whose throat out?" This time it was Kakashi growling, and he lifted Bisuke by the scruff of his neck and tossed him to one side. "Why are you imbeciles here anyway?"

"You promised us steak," Pakkun said haughtily. "We've come to collect."

Kakashi placed a glass of water down in front of Iruka and glared at his dogs. "Charming. I promised you nothing. He promised you." He jabbed a finger at Iruka.

"False," Ūhei said. "We don't know this intruder."

Kakashi frowned, and peered at Iruka. "Oh?"

"While this person appears to be Iruka-sensei-like, this person is undeniably female while Iruka-sensei is not." Shiba nodded sagely.

"Interesting. Seems like your scent had changed along with your physical appearance," Kakashi mused. "I suppose that makes sense."

"I really am Iruka," Iruka said helplessly. "I don't know what else to tell you."

Kakashi flapped a hand at the dogs dismissively. "Get lost. I don't have any meat for you, anyway."

The ninken did not move. Pakkun stared at him obstinately. "We are not going to leave while there is an intruder here. We cannot allow the last Hatake to knowingly put himself in danger."

"Last Hatake, huh? You sure have a way with words." Kakashi glared sternly at him, crouching down to be closer to his level. "The only thing I am in danger of is throwing you all out the window. Whether you're willing to believe me or not, I am 100% sure that that person is Iruka-sensei, and all you're doing right now is hurting his feelings. All of you at once is too much for this house, so please just leave. I'm tired and I don't want to deal with you right now."

With a tiny, fizzling pop, Bull disappeared. The rest of the ninken gazed uneasily at each other, and one by one slowly popped out of existence until only Pakkun was left.

"Explain," he demanded.

"I don't have to explain anything to you," Kakashi said disdainfully. "I am your master."

Pakkun growled. "What was that, brat? I am decades older than you –"

"Come here, Pakkun," Iruka interrupted.

Kakashi and Pakkun stared at him.

"The reason I am like this is because, well, Kakashi's not exactly going to be the 'last Hatake' anymore." He scratched his head awkwardly.

Pakkun continued to stare at him blankly.

"You are aware of what that stupid competition was for, right?"

"Kakashi is supposed to have a pup," Pakkun said. 'What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well." Iruka smiled nervously. "I am carrying his, uh, 'pup'."

Pakkun looked expectantly at Kakashi.

Kakashi shrugged. "It's true."

Pakkun lay down and put his paws over his eyes. "I don't believe this. Do humans usually do things like this?"

"No, they don't," Kakashi said curtly. "But it was necessary, and frankly none of your business. So get lost, and please refrain from telling the others about this."

Pakkun dropped one paw to the ground so he could see again. "You're keeping it a secret?"

"For now. Some of the pack get a little… excitable sometimes. I don't want to deal with that just yet."

"Fair call. If Bull knew his favourite Iruka-sensei was having your pup he probably wouldn't leave your side." Pakkun sighed, and stood up. "I guess I should take my leave then. Kakashi, practice being a gentleman."

"Only if you practice being a loyal canine," Kakashi retorted.

Pakkun snarled halfheartedly, and finally poofed out of existence.

Iruka let out a long sigh.

"I'm sure they didn't mean to offend you," Kakashi said after a moment's tense silence. "They can just be a little… overbearing sometimes."

Iruka shook his head. "I'm not offended. It's just rather exhausting."

"Is it the baby?" Kakashi asked worriedly.

"What?" Iruka frowned, then his face cleared and he burst out laughing. "No, I'm not exhausted because of the baby. That sort of thing shouldn't happen for a few more weeks. It's more everything surrounding the idea of having a child. It all feels so surreal."

"Oh." Kakashi's hands fluttered like he didn't know what to do with them. "Is there anything else I can get you? Food? Something warmer to wear? A book?"

"Sit down, Kakashi," Iruka said gently. "Please."

Kakashi sunk slowly onto the far end of the couch.

"I appreciate that you want to help me, but I need that to stop before it becomes a habit." Iruka smiled gently. "It's sweet, but I'm not sick. I can look after myself. And I need you to look out for yourself and prepare yourself for what's coming, because it is going to be difficult."

"I don't know what I should do," Kakashi admitted.

"You don't need to do anything right now," Iruka soothed. "What do you normally do when you have spare time?"

Kakashi shrugged. "I visit the memorial stone. I train. Sometimes I take Gai up on his annoying challenges."

"And?" Iruka prodded.

"And what?" Kakashi looked at him blankly. "That's it."

Iruka blinked. "You don't have anything you do for fun? Hobbies?"

"Training's fun, I guess. Oh, and I suppose I spend quite a lot of time reading." Kakashi held up an Icha Icha from the coffee table.

Iruka snorted. "You lead an exciting life."

"Don't let out my secrets or everyone will want to be me," Kakashi said dryly. "Copy Ninja, Master of Fun."

"Reading's not a bad hobby," Iruka consoled, "Though I must say I really judge your taste in literature."

"Jiraiya-sama writes compelling plots," Kakashi protested. "You're missing out."

Iruka shook his head. "You keep telling yourself that."

"I will." Kakashi paused, staring deeply at his hands, and then looked back up at Iruka. "How long are you going to look like that?"

Iruka glanced down at his feminine form, hidden in the folds of his baggy clothes. "Until tomorrow. Tsunade-sama said it was a good idea to hold this outward form for a while longer just to make sure the inward changes stay for longer. Is it weird?"

"A little." Kakashi studied his soft face and the gentle, sloping curve of his shoulders carefully. "I do find you very attractive like this, though."

"More so than normal?" Iruka asked, quickly biting his tongue.

Kakashi sighed. "This, again?"

"I shouldn't have said anything. Sorry." Iruka looked guilty.

"Does it seriously bother you that I'm also attracted to women?"

Iruka bit his lip. "Yes," he said quietly. "It bothers me that you're good-looking, rich, talented, powerful and fantastic in bed, and that anyone could be a potential partner for you. I realize it's an unfounded worry, and I'm working on it. But in the meantime, I'm insecure."

"You left out socially retarded, dangerous, and mentally unstable," Kakashi said sardonically. "My list of virtues is nowhere near as long as my profound deficiencies."

"Fair call." Iruka folded his legs up underneath him and settled back into the couch, drawing his fingers through his ponytail. "But fear is not a truly logical thing. I wanted to ask, how do you feel now about becoming a father?" He held up a hand quickly. "You don't have to answer if you don't want. I'd just like to know honestly, if you're comfortable sharing."

Kakashi leaned against the armrest and thought carefully. "I don't know." He stared thoughtfully at Iruka's flat stomach, buried underneath layers of fabric. "Truthfully, I still can't imagine it. It doesn't feel real to me."

Iruka rested his hands on his stomach. "Me either. This whole thing is so surreal that I feel any moment now I'll hear someone calling to wake me up from a coma. I mean, it wasn't so long ago that I thought just kissing you was a distant fantasy, and now I'm sitting here planning to have your child. It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?"

"I wouldn't believe it either if I hadn't had to sit through all those meetings with Tsunade-sama about it."

Iruka's voice turned serious. "Kakashi, now that there's definitely going to be a child involved you need to try letting your guard down a little. I want you to feel comfortable here, and I want you to feel comfortable with me. If there's anything I can do to help you with that, please tell me."

Kakashi breathed in deeply, and tugged his mask down under his chin.

Iruka blinked in surprise. "I didn't mean that. Not that I'm complaining, but I want you to be more comfortable, not push you out of your comfort zone."

"Maa, I'm expanding my borders." Kakashi gave a crooked smile to hide his nerves. "If I can get used to baring my face, maybe I'll become a little more normal. Besides, you changed your entire body for me. If I can't even show you mine, it makes me look pretty weak, doesn't it?"

"Don't put it that way." Iruka sighed. "I know it's a big deal to you, so please don't belittle yourself. I'm actually kind of honoured that you trust me enough to do that."

Kakashi shrugged. "But it shouldn't be a big deal, so I'm fixing it. It's important to you, right?"

"Well, it's difficult to spontaneously make out when I have to ask you to uncover your face before kissing you." Iruka fidgeted, weaving his fingers together nervously. "Speaking of, may I kiss you? These pills have been making me ridiculously horny and it's driving me nuts."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow suggestively and beckoned with his index finger. Iruka collapsed into him, crawling onto his lap and kissing him softly, then deeper as his hot, wet tongue explored the roof of Kakashi's mouth.

He licked his top lip seductively as he pulled back, and grinned. "You're growing whiskers. I kinda like it." Iruka ran his palm along Kakashi's scratchy jawline. "I suppose you've never thought about growing a beard, because it'd look strange with the mask."

Kakashi rubbed his chin against Iruka's hand like a dog begging to be pet. "My hair grows too slowly to bother anyway. It's only like this because I haven't shaved since that stupid competition started."

"Really?" Iruka tugged on the fine, silvery hairs, rolling his fingers against the grain. "I wish my hair was like that. I have to shave nearly every damn morning."

Kakashi snorted.

Iruka raised an eyebrow. "You don't believe me?"

Kakashi shook his head, and reached under Iruka's shirt to cup his heavy breasts. "It's just funny to hear you say that when right now for all intents and purposes you're a woman."

Iruka leaned into his touch and gasped as Kakashi flicked a nipple. "I forgot," he said breathlessly, and pulled away with great effort, pushing Kakashi's hands out from under his shirt. "I'm not going to seep with you again in this form."

"But you're so horny, remember?" Kakashi grinned. "You very nearly gave in just then."

Iruka huffed. "You tricked me."

"Maa, I did no such thing."

Iruka folded his arms across his chest, annoyed at how his breasts got in the way.

"You're the one who came onto me," Kakashi pointed out.

"I guess you're right," Iruka admitted, "But I still don't really want to do it like this." He jabbed a finger into Kakashi's chest. "As soon as I'm a man again we're doing it."

A leer slowly spread across Kakashi's face. "Well, who am I to argue with that?"

Iruka rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. "And no blindfolds, right?"

"Of course." Kakashi's tone turned serious. "Iruka, will you tell me why being blindfolded is so bad for you? If I'd known, I wouldn't have asked."

"And if I was truly uncomfortable, I wouldn't have allowed it." Iruka hesitated, biting his lip. "Sensory deprivation was a favourite tool of Mizuki's to throw me off-balance," he said slowly. "He'd lead me to expect one thing was going to happen, then do something completely unexpected. Because they were generally not pleasant surprises, I tend to freak out and expect the worst if I lose my sight or my hearing."

"Which is why you wanted me to speak and touch you," Kakashi theorized.

Iruka nodded. "It sounds kind of dumb in the light of day, but I needed proof that it was still just you in the room with me."

Kakashi frowned. "Did Mizuki –"

Iruka shook his head vehemently. "Please stop, Kakashi. I promise I'll explain whatever you want, but right now I'm emotionally exhausted. These past few days have been crazy, and I don't have the energy or desire to think about 'Zuki right now." He smiled tiredly, and pressed a finger against Kakashi's lips. "But thank you for this, for trusting me with your face and your child. I'm glad."

"I'd rather you than a reality TV show contestant," Kakashi said, nibbling his finger gently. "And I promise I won't bring up Mizuki until you're settled with all of this." In the meantime I could steal and scan through your records.

Kakashi smiled. He was much more comfortable with a solid plan in mind.

o0o

Kakashi stifled a sneeze. Tsunade really needs to pay someone to come in here and clean. He stared at the rows upon rows of dusty files, lit by thin, uneven bands of weak moonlight filtering in through the small windows. Maybe not. Given the confidentiality of much of the information here and the fatal traps on some of the files it wasn't a task that could be left to genin, and no jōnin would be idiotic enough to sign themselves up for a mission as a maid.

He frowned. He'd thought that Iruka's mission records would be the easiest to get ahold of, but whatever filing system had been used here was terrible and he couldn't make out where on earth to even find them. There were shelves marked genin, chūnin and jōnin, and shelves marked with the names of the other villages and surrounding areas, scrolls hanging perilously off them in some places and jammed flat in others.

This must just be every mission completed overall. It makes sense to keep some sort of record of that, given that most missions are carried out in teams. But where are the personal files? I know they exist. They must be somewhere else.

Kakashi skirted the perimeter of the room until he found another door, hidden in the shadows. Squinting at it with his sharingan, he grinned. Bingo. The door was covered with an intricate network of shimmering wards. He was surprised to sense traces of Iruka's chakra in them, but was smart enough to realize he shouldn't be. As a senior administrative staff member who also wrote many of the personal files on the pre-genin, of course Iruka would have access to this room. Heck, he probably even helped design the wards.

Focusing carefully, Kakashi slowly traced a swirling pattern onto the door, allowing only the smallest amount of chakra into his finger. This particular set of wards seemed like it was designed to eat chakra in order to keep a non-falsifiable record of everyone who entered. He had the clearance to be here, of course, but he didn't particularly want Iruka knowing. The wily chūnin would know exactly what he wanted to get from here.

As soon as he removed his hand the door clicked open, and he slunk inside. These files here were neater, as if someone had reorganized them in recent years. The file system in the previous room had probably been designed when the village was first constructed.

A quick glance at the closest shelf told him the files were in alphabetical order, which made things laughingly simple. A. I. U. Here we go. Ubai, Ubaraki, Uchiha?

Kakashi paused. There were only two Uchiha files left on the rack. Uchiha Sasuke. Uchiha Itachi. The last time he'd seen these records the Uchiha had an entire cabinet to themselves. He wondered if there was another room somewhere that housed all the records of dead shinobi. Probably. He'd assumed that deserters were also kept in a separate system, so it was a little strange to see Itachi's name. But that's not what I came for. Ueno, Umemori, Uotani. Where is Umino?

Kakashi frowned, irritation building in the back of his skull. There was a chance that Iruka's file had been temporarily misplaced, but he had a niggling feeling that it had been purposefully removed. Fine. I'll try medical records, then. That might actually tell me more.

A quick transportation jutsu and he landed in the hospital reception, startling a passing nurse into dropping her clipboard. "Oops." He smiled apologetically, but the effect was lost under the mask.

Kakashi strode up to the desk and leaned one elbow on it, peering down at the receptionist. The trouble with medical records was that they were all stored on a database rather than in a filing room, and while breaking wards and stealing papers was Kakashi's forte, technology most definitely was not. "Maa, I don't suppose you could help me, could you?" he drawled.

The poor woman looked terrified. "What can I do for you Shinobi-san?"

Kakashi was impressed. Her voice shook, but she'd managed to get out all the words in a comprehensible manner. "I'd like a printout of a certain shinobi's medical history. Is that doable?"

The woman quivered. "I'm sorry Sir, I am only authorized to give you your own records unless you have written permission from the Hokage."

"I am very impressed by your loyalty to the system," Kakashi said pleasantly, nonchalantly tugging his hitai ate upwards. "Now I'm going to ask you again, may I have the medical records for Umino Iruka? Please."

The woman's eyes grew round and blank, the light shuttering out of them. "As you wish, Shinobi-san."

It was a stupid, rash decision to use the sharingan and there was a high possibility he'd regret it later, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

"I'm sorry, Shinobi-san," the woman said after a few minutes of clicking. "I cannot get you the files for Umino Iruka."

"What?" Kakashi's tone was amiable. "I'm not sure I heard you correctly."

"I cannot get the files for Umino Iruka," the woman repeated. "His profile has a block on it that only the Hokage can remove. He has essentially been removed from the system."

"Thank you," Kakashi fumed, storming out the glass doors into the cool night. Tsunade-sama. That bitch.

o0o

"I figured you'd be here sooner or later. Sit down, have a drink." Tsunade gestured to the half empty bottle of sake on the table, seemingly undisturbed that Kakashi had broken into her house in the middle of the night. "Frankly, I'm amazed you managed to hold out this long. How's Iruka-sensei doing?"

"Iruka is fine," Kakashi bit out, refusing the drink and the seat and instead standing in an offensive stance in front of her sofa.

"Very good." Tsunade sat up and poured herself another drink. "Now, I suppose you have something to say to me?"

"Why have you hidden Iruka's records?" Kakashi growled. "Did he ask you to?"

"No, he hasn't asked me for anything." Tsunade took a gentle sip of sake, and then downed the rest in one gulp. "I decided to do it of my own accord. For both of your sakes'."

Kakashi folded his arms across his chest. "I need to see them."

"No, you don't." Tsunade stared at him, hard. "Brat, Iruka-sensei is terrifyingly honest. If you ask him about his history, he'll tell you. But if you go behind his back to secretly disassemble his past you're setting yourself up for a future of mistrust. Do not treat your relationship like a mission, is that clear?"

Kakashi scowled.

Tsunade sighed. "Look, I understand it is hard for you to only gain the information you want in incomplete chunks, but it's for the best. Trust in him, so that he can trust in you."

"Easy for you to say," Kakashi muttered.

"Kakashi," Tsunade said sharply, "You must understand the enormity of what this man is doing for you right now. You will not go searching for Iruka-sensei's records again, have I made myself clear?"

Kakashi glared at her, his genius brain already working overtime. "Hai, Hokage-sama."

If I can't access his formal records, who else is there I can mine for information?