In the end, Dipper, Mabel, and Ford all agreed that they were in no state to have a big party. A smaller, more intimate affair with them, Soos, and Wendy; maybe some of Wendy's friends, since Mabel figured they could use something non-high school-ish to sooth their teenage trauma.

The party was set for the day BEFORE their birthday. The Pines wanted the last day of summer to be between themselves, and it was something everyone could agree on, schedule-wise. They still knew it would be something of a somber affair.

Soos and Wendy were aware of Stanley's 'leaving'. It had been difficult to tell them, but Mabel rationalized that Soos and Wendy would be able to tell what was up, and could instantly tell the difference between the two elder Pines.

To his credit, Soos seemed to be handling the absence of his father figure maturely, knowing that it wasn't the same situation with his birthfather. He'd been in Gravity Falls all his life, and knew the weirdness sometimes did things that couldn't be understood. If anything, it gave him a reason to extend his planned visit to Portland to meet up with Melody, mentioning 'Mr. Pines always asked if I was gonna date Melody properly an' settle down. Guess now I don't have a reason not to, right?'.

Wendy took it worse. She had almost been too upset to hear about the birthday party, but she had accepted the invite, brushing past Ford on the way out, emitting a tangible aura of contempt. She hadn't gone home, but rather sat outside on the couch, staring out over the property.

It was nearing dusk when Ford stepped outside, pausing when he saw her still sitting there. "…Are you alright?" he asked. "Do you need a ride home?"

Wendy rubbed her arms, scowling. "No," she replied bitterly. "I'm fine."

Ford looked around awkwardly, sort of forgetting what he had come out here for in the first place. "…It's getting late," he said. "Are you sure you—"

"Was it you?" she demanded sharply, glowering at him. "Did you make him leave?" Ford stared at her, his brain scrambling to come up with an answer out of the jumbled mess that was spewed up.

"…I…no, I…" he stammered, unable to properly say 'no, I didn't make him leave'. Because that would be a partial lie. It WAS because of him that his brother was gone. "I didn't…"

"Because I'm not stupid," she continued, her eyes looking glassy. "Soos told me the whole story, and I've seen you two interact. You always looked at him like he was some stray mongrel ruining your PERFECT little world! So FORGIVE me if I'm not convinced you didn't have anything to do with this!"

"He's my brother!" Ford snapped, feeling his nerves fray slightly. "I'm no heartless monster, I wouldn't have thrown him out!"

"Yeah, well, you wouldn't have made him feel welcome either," she shot back, crossing her arms. "I have THREE brothers, and they get under my fingernails so much it's sometimes unbearable. But you bet your ass if they need me, I'm there!" She glowered, her eyes hard. "Three years back, they wrecked my chainsaw sculpture that would have taken me to nationals in the US Young Lumberjacks competition, but I didn't throw them out of my life for it!"

Ford clenched his hands tightly, quelling down his first instinct to lash out. "Some silly competition is no comparison to a possible entrance to the best school in the country—"

"By WHOSE impossible standards, you jackass!?" Wendy snapped. "That competition was important to ME! So what do I care what YOU think of it, you elitist prick!" She scowled, wiping her face furiously. "So maybe to an elitist like YOU, he wasn't worth much! But to us backwoods simple folk, he was EVERYTHING! That man gave me a job when every store in this town kicked me to the curb and my dad was going to send me to a logging camp, and he let me KEEP it, even though I was a crap employee!"

She wiped her eyes, her face red with anger. "Stan's bailed me out of trouble, paid off cops to keep 'driving without a license' off my record, and punched out stupid guys who wouldn't stop harassing me. I've known that man all my life, and now he's GONE, and it all started when YOU came here! So yeah, excuse the CRAP out of me for thinking the worst!" She sat back hard on the couch, her chin quivering from the effort it took to not make a noisier fuss.

"…He's as good as family," she said quietly. "I'd even go as far to say he's my best friend. He's certainly more reliable than anyone else in my life, and he's a professional conman. And now that he's gone, I've got no more reliable rock, no more job, and nowhere safe to go when I want to get some sleazebag off my back." She kicked at the porch floor almost petulantly. "So I hope your stupid house and supernatural crap was worth it."

Ford's first reaction was to shout, rave, and rant, and possibly kick the surly teenager off of his property, but he forced himself to remain calm, take a few deep breaths, and rationalize. HE was the adult, he needed to act like it.

He was also 93% sure Stanley would come out of wherever he went and shove his size 11 foot up his ass if he made the girl more upset than she already was. So he began following the mantra that had helped him through THIS much so far: What Would Stanley Do?

Ford quietly sat down on the arm of the couch, staring out at the darkening forest. "…It wasn't," he said softly, his voice thick with restraint to keep it civil. "If burning my house, my birth certificate, and my journals could bring him back, I would do it in a heartbeat. It only serves me right that I realize the lengths I would go for him now that he's gone."

"It's not just YOU that's getting served," Wendy said bitterly, rubbing her arms. "You've been out of touch, old man, you didn't even KNOW him like we did. YOU feel like shit out of guilt. I feel like shit because I just lost someone who's been a constant my ENTIRE LIFE, and I didn't even get to say goodbye." Tears dripped down her face, but she made no move to brush them away.

"You know, my first memory was of this place. My mom brought me here. I dunno what for, this place had been around long enough that it wasn't anything new or whatever…but everyone in town's been here." She rubbed her arms. "I can just remember Stan being nice to me. He likes kids, as long as they don't wreck anything…so of course, me being like, five years old, I bit his hand." Her lips twitched slightly. "Guess I've been a pain in his ass ever since, and ten years later, he hires me for his shop."

She looked upwards at the sky, which was fading from dusky red to nighttime blue. "…That's…just the kind of guy he was," she said. "I kinda get why he was so accommodating to me now, considering we both have daddy issues and no one really thinks we're gonna amount to much in the long run." She let out a softy, shaky scoff. "…Never did tell him 'thank you' for everything…"

"…Neither did I," Ford said, wringing his hands. "And you're right. I DIDN'T know him like everyone else did. I didn't want to. And now he's gone, and I'm finding out just what a…a GOOD person he was, through little things he left behind…through people who knew him…not from him…when he was RIGHT THERE, willing to share…"

He sighed, his fingers clenching around themselves. "…the last conversation we had, I told him I didn't think I would be able to forgive him for everything." He swallowed a prickling lump in his throat. "Now…the past seems so trivial and STUPID…it's so easy to forgive now, when you'd give anything to get them back." He took off his glasses, rubbing his face.

"'I'm sorry' just…doesn't cut it now, does it?"

Wendy snorted, wiping at her own face. "No," she replied. "It doesn't." She looked up at the sky. "…But it's a start." She glanced over at him, seeing his surprised expression. "…I might not know a lot about you, but you sure struck me as the kind of person who has a ton of trouble saying 'please', 'thank you', and 'sorry'."

Ford put his glasses back on, giving her a wry smile. "How do you figure that?" Wendy smiled back.

"…Stan's the same way."

Ford sat there quietly, feeling oddly…GOOD, being compared to his brother by someone who cared for him, even if the subject wasn't that much to be proud of. It was just…something. He felt a more genuine smile twitch at his lips as he sighed.

"…do you think you could help me with something?" He wrung his hands together again. "…Dipper and Mabel deserve a good party…and you know them both better than I do. Do you think you could…?"

"Give you some pointers?" Wendy provided. "Sure thing. Soos could help too. He'd do anything for the Pines family."

Ford nodded quietly, recalling that Stanley seemed to include the young man in on many family discussions and outings. "Thank you," he said.

"Old dog can learn new tricks," Wendy muttered, snickering at Ford's annoyed expression. "Don't worry about it. We'll make sure Dipper and Mabel have a great birthday, alright?"

Ford gave her a grateful smile, standing. "It's too dark outside for you to be walking anywhere," he said. "Please, let me drive you home."

Wendy looked up at the sky again, grimacing slightly. "…you're right," she said. "Alright. I don't…really feel okay walking around in the dark anymore." She stepped off the porch while Ford poked his head into the house.

"Kids, I'm driving Wendy home, alright? I'll be back soon!"

Stampeding footfalls let him know his departure wasn't well-received.

"Grunkle Ford, can we go with you?" Mabel asked, a twinge of fear in her voice. Dipper didn't ask, but he rather began fumbling to put his shoes on. Ford sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.

"…Kids, please…" he said softly. "It's just for a few minutes, not more than a half-hour." He took his cell phone out of his pocket to show it to them. "I have my phone on me, fully-charged in case of an emergency, and I made perfectly sure the wards around the house wont let so much as a gnome or fairy through." He put his phone back into his pocket, ruffling their hair. "If it makes you feel better, you can each pick something from the armory to keep on you…but I'm going to come back, I promise."

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other, identical looks of worry and a twinge of distrust displayed fully on their faces. Ford sighed, kneeling down to their level.

"…I know you have no reason to, especially considering…" he said quietly. "…but please, kids. TRUST ME. I'll come back. And when I do, we'll watch a movie with some popcorn. Half an hour. Thirty minutes. Okay?"

The twins shared another look before giving him a tight hug and stepping back.

"Thirty minutes," Mabel confirmed firmly, crossing her arms. "If you're even ONE minute late, you're singing the 'Stan Wrong Song'. WITH dancing. ON CAMERA."

"…The what?"

"…I'd just make sure you weren't late," Dipper said, looking at his watch. "Seven forty-four now. Mabel MEANS it."

Ford smiled, shutting the door behind him, turning to Wendy. "Ready to go." He walked to the car with her, starting it up.

"I'd drive a little fast," she said, buckling up. "When Mabel makes you perform a song-and-dance of shame, she goes all out. And it's twenty minutes to my house."

In hindsight, she sort of wished she hadn't teased about the distance to her house. Crazy driving seemed to be a Pines family thing.

It took twenty-eight minutes for him to get back, and Mabel was only SLIGHTLY disappointed she wouldn't have a matching song-and-dance of shame for him and Stanley. It was made up for when the movie they picked out was a nice compilation of them of whatever they managed to capture over the summer.

It was a little hard at first, seeing Stan in some videos, but Mabel picked out the more lighthearted ones, coming up with the final take of Stan performing the 'Stan Wrong Song', the end of which Mabel had told him to throw a handful of glitter and birdseed for a flourishing finish, and Stan proceeded to get attacked by birds, running around and shouting as he batted them back. By the end of the short video, Dipper, Mabel, and Ford were howling with laughter and didn't settle down until well after the clip was over.

A couple more videos in—consisting mostly of Dipper exploring some Gravity Falls weirdness and Mabel showing off her questionable knowledge of all things glitz and glamour—the kids had fallen asleep. Ford continued to watch through the movies, too interested in getting to know his family to just turn them off.

He had just finished off a clip of Mabel's puppet show—as well as almost turning it off when he heard Mabel shout 'GET OUT OF MY BROTHER'S BODY YOU EVIL TRIANGLE!' and end things with a literal bang—and was about to turn the tape off when another clip showed up.

He saw Stanley on the screen, burying his face in the newspaper and trying to ignore the camera that was pointed at him.

"For th' last time, Mabel, I'm not doin' it," Stanley muttered gruffly. Mabel sighed heavily behind the camera and set it down on the table, the sound of a chair scraping on the floor giving the audio cue of her sitting down.

"Okay, fine, the camera's off," Mabel fibbed. "But please, Grunkle Stan…I really wanna hear one."

Stanley put the paper down, his expression exasperated and almost tired. "Mabel, why th' heck do you even wanna know so badly?" he asked.

"…Because I'd like to hear something NICE about you two for once," Mabel replied, sounding dejected. "It doesn't hafta be gushy or anything, just…nice."

Stanley drummed his fingers on the table, looking contemplative. "…ugh, alright," he muttered. "But tell ANYONE this, an' I'll deny it forever."

"Lips are sealed, Grunkle Stan."

"…It was back in th' seventh grade, during a really bad spring fever that turned into th' flu. His fever got so high, he almost caught meningitis, started hallucinating an' all. He kept crying about how he was gonna fail math because of a huge exam comin' up. Man, our math teacher was a REAL piece of work then. Couldn't stand it that Stanford was so smart. Heck, I even think Stanford was smarter than HIM, y'know?

"…anyway, Stanford was SURE he was gonna fail math since this exam was gonna be worth a fourth of our grade, an' he was HOPING so hard t' get into a trigonometry class th' next year with th' high school crowd, but he HAD to keep his A grade…"

Stanley paused, drumming his fingers on the table again. "…I couldn't stand seein' him like that, crying for three days straight over that stupid exam, even after his fever broke an' he wanted to go back to school…so I studied my a…my butt off for a week, wore my glasses to school, an' took all his classes in his place. I forged a note from Ma sayin' he was feelin' better, and that I was feelin' sick. Took that jerk's exam, an' passed it with an A."

He rubbed the back of his head. "…'course, that meant that 'Stanley' DIDN'T take th' test, an' failed. By th' time Stanford got back to school an' took a few after-school makeup days, he thought he'd taken his exam with one of 'em an' passed. He got into his trig class like he wanted…I never had th' heart to tell 'im it was me that got 'im there."

"Awww, Grunkle Staaaaaan, that's so sweet!" Mabel gushed off-camera. "Kinda like when I dressed like Dipper and punched some bully's tooth out when they wouldn't stop picking on him!"

Stanley laughed. "That's my girl. We gotta stick up for th' nerds, even if they never know it."

"Yeah! Go Team Personality!"

"Team Personality!"

They high-fived over the table.

The clip cut to black.

Ford stared at the screen, sitting back on the couch hard. Did that really happen? Did Stanley REALLY do that for him? Sure, they'd done the Twin Thing before…and certainly, once the teachers got over the novelty of his extra fingers, they sometimes had trouble telling them apart if Stanley wore his glasses to school…but did Stanley REALLY take HIS exam and pass?

…Enough selling your brother short, Ford, he thought to himself, sounding exasperated even in his own head. Of course he could have. Stanley learned physics and quantum mechanics to start up the portal again…his brother was capable of so much when he applied himself.

He wiped his eyes, smiling. Without his brother, he would've been stuck behind in math because of a bitter jerk teacher…and who KNOWS how that could have panned out in the long run.

"…You never cease to amaze me, Lee," he muttered, closing his eyes. "…just wish this 'doing questionable things and not telling each other' business would end already. It's already been established that we can handle more than the other thinks."

He paused as though giving his brother some means to answer. Of course, there was none. "Alright, fine. Keep your secrets. You know I'll find 'em out anyway…"

He settled back for some shut-eye, drifting off to sleep, though one final thought passed his mind, and not in his own voice.

'You should know by now that some mysteries aren't worth solving.'